Producer: What are we to do? Arcee you said you knew someone.

Stagehand: 2 minutes till we're back on the air.

Producer: Well? We don't have much time.

Arcee: Do I have to? He's a [Beep]ing jerk.

Rattrap: Just do it, I have my own [Beep]ing problems and I'm finally on prime-time.

Arcee: [Beep], I hate him and what is with beeping me out? We aren't even on the air.

*Meanwhile, back stage, on the phone*

Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen: What… I don't care, just catch him… You lost him… No, you won't get paid… just find him… Hold on I have another call. Hello… you saw what… so he is eh?… well just replace him I need a new assistant and don't do this yourself, I don't want to scare any potential employees with stories about a giant shark! *hangs up* Oh great, he was my favorite assistant, Oh well.

(Author's Note: He is not behind the screen at this time.)

*A voice* Now back to our show

Audience: Jerry, Jerry, Jerry, Jerry!

Rattrap: Jerry's dead!

Producer: No, he isn't, he's just in a coma.

Rattrap: Same thing.

Producer: Uh... no. Introducing our new host, Springer.

(Author's Note: Some of you expected this didn't you.)

Arcee: [Beep]

Springer: Why do you always criticize me?

Arcee: Criticize you, I never…

Rattrap: What about me?

Arcee and Springer: Shut up Rattrap!

Arcee: You [Beep] sucking hog.

Springer: You're just a [Beep] [Beep] bot.

*Jerry Bouncers are going over to break up the fight but realize that the robots are much larger so they back away*

*At this time the Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen goes behind the screen*

Audience: Boo!

*A lone figure rises out of the Audience. You hear a click as the rocket launcher clicks into the firing position*

Moon Kitty: You killed Dinobot! Die Hasbro scum!

*Click*

*Click*

Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen: You do know that a rocket launcher is a projectile weapon?

Moon Kitty: [Beep] this.

*She continues to storm out*

Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen: That was predictable.

Producer: I thought you screened for Wakos, Kooks, and, Message Board Junkies.

Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen: *To self, with pride* We fail again.

*Arcee and Springer continue to fight*

Producer: Could we break this up and get on with the show?

Arcee and Springer: No!

Producer: Then can you take it somewhere else?

Arcee: Alright we can move.

Springer: And what about me what if I don't want to move?

Arcee: Do you want to move?

Springer: Yes, but that is beyond the point.

Arcee: No it isn't.

Springer: Ahhhhhh *as Arcee throws him a cross the studio*

Rattrap: Final about my problem…

Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen: What problem, you are well pay and reasonable benefits.

Rattrap: Reasonable? Is that what you call working for nothing? I don't get paid and I could get killed off at any time, there is no job security.

Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen: I beg to…

*Phone rings*

Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen: It's mine. Hello… I see… couldn't you fake the records?… well, ok. *to all* I have just been informed that I am wr… wrrr… wrong. *quietly to self* [Beep] this.

Megatron: What about me? I'm a floating piece of Mecha-[Beep] with an ugly dress. By the [Beep] it looks awful.

Rattrap: You never were much for the optics.

Megatron: Why you little…

Rattrap: What are you gonna do, give me warm soda?

Megatron: I'll give you a [Beep]ing warm soda?

*Megatron lifts a chair and tries to throw it, but his right arm is too weak and it falls on him*

Rattrap: Ha, you couldn't lift an army let alone a [Beep]ing chair.

Producer: Where is Springer? He is supposed to be running this show.

Rattrap: Out with Arcee.

Springer: No I'm right here.

Rattrap: Then where, may I ask, is Arcee?

Springer: She is tied up talking with Skir. Moving on, Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen I hear you have a drug problem.

Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen: That is a lie, I have never used any [Beep]ing drugs in my life.

Springer: Then how do you explain what you did at the premier of Star Wars: Episode 1?

Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen: There are no [Beep]ing photos, you have no proof.

Springer: Oh really then how do you explain these? *holds up a manila folder*

Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen: It's a setup, they spiked the punch I tell you.

Rattrap: And who would this be?

Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen: Takara!

*Springer falls to the floor and starts crying*

Springer: I too was addicted to drugs, I was on Ener-crack.

Megatron: I can't believe it.

Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen: Is this true?

Springer: No, not really, I just did that for dramatic effect.

Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen: Up your [Beep]ing [Beep].

Rattrap: [Beep] you, you made me the most [Beep]ed up character, I look awful. I'm not Rattrap, I'm [Beep]trap.

Megatron: What about me? You gave me an ugly dress and now I don't scare children, they just laugh at my ugliness.

Rattrap and Megatron: We're both ugly!

Megatron: I know, I'll sue that guy behind the screen.

Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen: You can't, that wheeling [Beep] pile already did, and if you sue me it's double Jeopardy

Rattrap: Not if it's a group action lawsuit…

Springer: So now we…

*Arcee runs up behind Springer and knocks him over with a chair.

Arcee: You tied me up.

Springer: You told me to bring the high tensile steal rope on our last date.

Arcee: That was to tie up my new chandelier, I would have told you about it, but I knew you would skip out on our date, and you did anyway.

Springer: I was called out to go, a giant vacuum cleaner sucked me up!

Arcee: I knew you were cheating on me.

*Arcee picks up and throws a chair at Springer*

Rattrap: Run for cover.

*Everyone screams and runs off for cover*

Megatron: It suddenly occurs to me that we are getting enough air time.

Rattrap: Yes, I want to sue NOW!

Megatron: *To Hasbro exec. in a Shakespearean voice* I will sue you and your little dog too.

(Author's Note: We're off to see the wizard, the… oh.. uh... yes, I don't I any idea what just happened to Megatron.)

Rattrap: What!? How… who… I…

Producer: Everyone look, the wheeled rat is dumbfounded.

(Author's Note: This shocks everyone, who knew the Land of Oz could do this. Idea: Get Rattrap sucked into a tornado more often.)

*Rattrap wheels off while "towing" the floating Megatron*

Springer: Come on, I didn't cheat, I just died. Why are you still hitting me?

Arcee: Because you liked it too much.

*Everyone gets out while they can*

Springer: Owww! Stop it, you're hurting me.

Arcee: You think that hurts?

*She picks up a metal support beam and begins hitting Springer with it*

Arcee: Remember folks, Tune in, same *swings* BAT time, same *swings* BAT channel.

*In the back parking lot, Mysterious Hasbro Exec. Behind the Screen is getting in his car*

(Author's Note: NO, he is not behind the screen.)

Moon Kitty: You gave Dinobot a bad toy. Eat this Hasbro!

*A beam of energy is emitted from the shadows and the car burst in to flames, in the shadows we see two "shadowy figures" one is Moon Kitty the other is a well dressed man*

(Author's Note: Ouch, talk about a woman's scorn.)

Moon Kitty: Thank you, I would have asked someone else but no one had any energy weapons, and nothing like this.

Well Dressed Man in the Shadows: Yes, the plasma canon is my favorite too. If you need anything else just ask. Now I have a date, have a nice night.

Moon Kitty: Do you want this now?

Well Dressed Man in the Shadows: No, drop it off tomorrow. Tonight we are working on the Medieval Weaponry Game.

Moon Kitty: Ok, have fun

Well Dressed Man in the Shadows: We will.

*Back in the studio*

Skir: Rrr wrrr br reverd. Rrr wrrr br reverd. Rrrrrrrrrr wrrrrrrrr brr *long pause* REVERD!