~THE OPTIMIST~After dying
in a car crash, three friends go to
Heaven for orientation. They are all
asked the same
question."When you
are in your casket and friends and
family are mourning upon you, what would
you like to hear them say about
you?"The first guy
immediately responds. "I would like to
hear that I was one of the great doctors
of my time and a great family
man!"The second guy says.
"I would like to hear that I was a
wonderful husband and school teacher
that made a huge difference in our
children of tomorrow!"The
third guy thinks a minute and
replies."I would like to
hear them say......LOOK,
HE'S MOVING!!!!!!"
~THE LOTTERY~
Mabel comes home
one evening all excited. She runs
through the door and shouts out to her
husband."Honey! Pack
your things. I've just won the
lottery!"Her husband
responds. "Should I pack for the ocean
or pack for the
mountains?"She
says."I don't care,
just get the hell out !!!"
(Song)Shameless
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