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BASARA BADMINTON

Arrow: Hi and welcome to the first annual Basara badminton tournament!! YAAAAYY! Your host today are myself (Arrow) and everyone's favorite baby owl, Shinbashi!!

Shinbashi: ::waves a wing:: Piii! [Hiiii!]

Arrow: O.O SHINBASHI, YOU'RE TOO DAMN CUTE!!

Shinbashi: ~.~;; Pi. ::ruffles his feathers:: [Hurry the hell up. I'm tired.]

Arrow: -.- Yeah, yeah. Damn owl. Anyway, let the games begin! Our first match is the one we've all been waiting for, the match…between--

Shinbashi: --PIIIII!!! [MY TURN!!]

Arrow: …Go ahead.

Shinbashi: Pi. Pi piii pi PI pi pipipi!!! [Thank you. Between the super-spiffy, wonderful-beautiful-kick-ass-sword-wielding star of Jipangu, TATARA, and that fuck-head, the Aka no Ou.]

Sarasa: ::jogs out on the court, waves at Shinbashi:: Hi Shinbashi! Hi… Arrow …

Arrow: ::waving little flags that say "Tatara" on one side and "Sarasa" on the other:: Eeee! Good luck Sarasa! Where's Shuri?

Shuri: ::comes out regally, has his funky big-ass lump of metal helmet on his head:: Tatara!!--…Sarasa..?

Shinbashi: ::sweatdrops:: Pi. [Dammit.]

Sarasa: …Shuri..um…are you going to be alright, with only one arm..?

Arrow: *.* Shuri'll be fine…a missing arm wouldn't bother Shuri…

Shuri: ::shrugs:: Geh.

Shinbashi: PI! Pi piii! [Okay! Let's get the game going!]

Sarasa: ::throws off her…thing…that's like a cloak, but not really, and takes out a spiffy badminton racquet that's all engraved and stuff:: Let's go.

Shuri: ::takes out a racquet that has a BRIGHT red frame:: Alright. Tatara.

Arrow: O.o Heya Shuri, two questions--number one, is that racquet RED enough, and number two, HOW BLEEPING BIG DOES YOUR HELMET-WHATEVER-THAT-IS HAVE TO BE?!

Shinbashi: ::twitches:: Pi. [Pretty damn big.]

Shuri: ..Shut up.

Arrow: *.* Yes, Shuri.

Shinbashi: Pi? PIII! [Ready? GO!]

Sarasa: ::hits the birdie, in Tatara mode and stuff now:: Aka no Ou…

Shuri: ::hits back:: Nice serve…Tatara…

Arrow: -.-

Shinbashi: -.-; Piii. [This is boring already.] ::falls asleep::

Sarasa: ::hits the birdie::

Kagerou: … [You know, badminton is insulting to birds everywhere. I mean, what's with calling the thing you hit a "birdie"? Why not just a SHUTTLE or something?] ::flaps his wings:: [Geh.]

Shinbashi: ::hops up to him:: Piii! [Daddy!]

Kagerou: …. [Hello, Shinbashi.]

Arrow: ::leans back in her comfy announcer/commentator chair:: God, this is BORING!! Hurry it up, would you guys?

Shuri: ::losing to Sarasa:: Tatara!! Korose!!!

Sarasa: ::winning by…10 points:: -.- Shut up, Shuri. You can't kill me with one arm. Dork.

Arrow: Yeah, dork. What the hell were you thinking, letting Hiiragi-sensei cut your arm off?!

Shinbashi: Pi pi pii. Pi piii! [That's enough now. Game over, Sarasa/Tatara wins!]

Sarasa: Yay!! I won, Shinbashi!!!

Shinbashi: Pi. [I just said that, stupid.] ::falls asleep again::

Shuri: Fuck. I lost. ::drops his racquet, whips off his helmet and grabs Sarasa with his good arm and kisses her:: Good game.

Sarasa: -.- ::socks him:: Shuri. You're still Aka no Ou. Get the hell offa me. ::thwackthwack::

Shuri: ::puts her down:: ;.; Sarasa… ::walks off::

Arrow: ::waves to Shuri sadly:: Aw, bye, Shuri…you can always come up here if you want to.. ::winks::

Shuri: O.o ::sidles away:: Ew…

Arrow: ;.; Damn.

Shinbashi: ::wakes up:: Pi? [Are they done now?] Pi! [Next match!]

Arrow: Yeah, okay..uhhhh…who's the next match? Shinbashi?

Shinbashi: Pi pi pii pi piiiii! [The next match is between…the Ao no Ou, Asagi, and our favorite one-eyed government conspirator-person, AGEHA!]

Arrow: O.O YES!! I've been waiting for this for weeks! KICK HIS ASS, AGEHA!! ::Gets out her "Ageha is a hottie!!" and "Asagi can go suck…eggs! Yeah!!" flags:: Eeee!

Asagi: ::jogs out, wearing his stupid-looking headband with the blue crud on it:: ^.^v Hel-LO, dear viewers!

Arrow: -.- Die, Asagi. PLEASE go die.

Shinbashi: ::flies down and whaps Asagi in the face with his wings:: Piiii! [You're a diiiick!]

Ageha: ::just walking out, looks around with his good eye, wearing his black assassin-guy outfit:: …Interesting.

Arrow: *.* |> ::Waves her flags:: Eeee! Kick ass, Ageha!

Asagi: ::gets out a blue racquet, swings it a few times:: Okay..here we go, you one-eyed..uh…buttpuppet..!!!

Arrow: -.- Oh fuck you, Asagi. ::chucks a big-ass BATSU sticker at him::

Ageha: ::Gets out another blue racquet and just glares at Asagi--with one eye::

Asagi: oXo HEY! You dick, you have the same racquet!!

Ageha: -.# …No. I have had this racquet since I was a little boy. I know you ordered your little monkey boy Muratake to get a racquet just like mine for this match, Ao no Ou.

Asagi: ;X; You..you…you…!

Arrow: ::too mad at Asagi to say anything::

Shinbashi: Pi. [Play, guys.]

Ageha: ::Serves 'cause he's cooler::

Asagi: Okay, okay, okay, I got it, I got i--fuck. ::misses:: I had that! ::throws the birdie over the net to Ageha::

Arrow: HA! I told you, Ageha kicks ass.

Ageha: -.# ::stands perfectly still, continually slamming the birdie at Asagi's feet::

Asagi: ;X; This SUCKS!

Shinbashi: Pi pii! [No, you suck!] ::whacks him in the face again::

Asagi: ::runs off, weeping like the stupid dork that he is::

Arrow: ::jumps up and down happily:: Eeee!! Yaaaaay Ageha!!

Ageha: ^.#v ::jogs out, comes right back:: o.# Don't go outside of the gym.

Shinbashi: Pi pi? [Why?]

Ageha: ::shudders:: Tatara…

Arrow: -.- Are they out there boinkin' each other again? Jesus Christ…

Sarasa: ::from outside:: SHUUUUURIII!

Arrow: o.o ::hides:: Save me, Ageha…

Shinbashi: >.<

Arrow: ::winces, comes back to the mic:: O-kay, next match! No one go outside, just stay in here and you'll be safe.

A couple voices from in the stands: ^.^ Hey, SEX! Huh-huh-huh, kick ass, let's go, like, check 't out, dude!! Huh-huh-huh-huh….huh…

Ageha: ::stands in the corner, looking at the crowd for government officials for him to conveniently assassinate, having changed into his other, spiffy eyepatch:: ^.V

Crowd: ::mostly chained down and duct-taped to the bleachers, being very nice so that Arrow doesn't punish them:: …

Shuri: ::from outside:: SARASAAA!!

Arrow: ::curls up into a little ball, traumatized::

Shinbashi: ::pats Arrow on the head with a wing:: Pii, pi… Pi pii pi PI, pi, pi pi pii!! [It's okay, they should be finished soon… But, ladies and gentlemen, our next match is between our two princesses, Senju-hime and Shima-chan!!]

Arrow: O.O ::curls into a littler ball:: I don't think this could get any worse…

Senju-hime and Shima-chan: ::simultaneously:: My goodness, where's Shuri-sama?

Miyuu and Kaede, in the stands: ::throw stuff at Senju and Shima:: >D

Sayoko: Hey, it's the chick with the blob-of-jello-baby! Heh heh…

Sushu: ::trying to follow everything:: Um… Arrow…this is REALLY crazy…

Reiko, Mia, Emma, and Ayesha: ::bored because they have no idea who these people are:: Dum de dum… Arrow's a nutcase…

Kaede: ::trying to peek out the door at Sarasa and Shuri:: Heyyy…check it out… >.< Nevermind, don't.

Miyuu: >.< God, they sure take a LONG time! I'm sure if Kenshin and Kaoru did it--

Kaede: --they'd be boinkin' each other for DAYS! ^.^

Everyone else in the Gumi: >.< ::scoots away from Kaede:: Nasty thought…oh, man…

Kaede: 9.9 ::discreetly sticks a bumper-sticker-thing that says "I'D RATHER BE BOINKING THE BATTOUSAI" on Miyuu's back as she scoots away:: ^.^v

Senju-hime: ::can't find her racquet:: ;.;! Oh no!

Shima-chan: ::trying to figure out how the racquet works, confused:: Oh my…how does..this..oh…

Sayoko and Reiko: -.-; ::take over throwing stuff at Shima and Senju:: STUPIDS!!

Sushu: ::gives up on the badminton:: Geh. ::takes out her latest book and reads::

Arrow: ::sitting in the announcer's booth with new flags that say, "YOU SUCK" on one side and "GET OFF THE COURT" on the other, gives one to Shinbashi:: Woo.

Shinbashi: Pii! [Yee-ha!]

Shima-chan: ::gets hit in the back of the head with a…hot dog…:: ;.;!!! ::falls over, snuffling::

Everybody: -.-

Miyuu: OhmiGOD, can she just die or something already?! ::chucks a handy sharp object at Shima::

Shima-chan: ::gets impaled through the forehead:: x.x

Shinbashi: ::bikubiku:: Pii pi pi! Pi! [So Senju-hime wins by default! Or something!]

Arrow: YAY--oh wait, nevermind. Screw you, Senju. Go mourn for Shidou the Dick.

Senju: ::shuffles off into the bathroom to nurse::

Crowd: >.<

Kaede: HEY! It's not gross!

Miyuu: ::pokes:: But it's Senju-hime and Shidou's kid.

Kaede: …Oh yeah. Eww.

Miyuu: Yeah.

Arrow: ::peering through the glass at Shima:: Duuuuude, whoa, is she dead?

((::keeps wanting to write "Shinma":: Heh…Shinma…Ranka… "Ra…en…Ra…en…." "Larva…" "::be's spiffy and returns Raen/Baku to the Dark::"))

Shuri: ::comes back in, fixing his shirt, a big-ass grin plastered all over his face:: …Whoa damn. ::pokes Shima's body with a stick:: Oh well. ::over his shoulder:: HEY, SARASA, WANNA GO BACK TO THE ONSEN?

Sarasa: ::pokes her head in, bright red:: Shuri…later! ::throws a shoe at him:: Prick.

Arrow: ::has a mixed expression of disgust, embarrassment, and flabbergastedness:: Shuuuuuriiii…I'LL go to the onsen with yo--OW!!

Mia: -.- ::threw HER shoe at Arrow:: Sick, twisted…girl. ::goes back to her DD fold-out:: Ooooh…

Sayoko: OhmiGOD. I'm leaving, I don't know these people, but--heyyyy… ::looks over Mia's shoulder at the DD fold-out::

Reiko: ::sleeping, stretched out on a bleacher..thingie-steppy-mabobber::

Shinbashi: ::motions for the janitors to clean up the mess of Shima's cadaver:: Pi pi pi piipi. {Okay, next match.}

Arrow: Yeah…next match… ::dazed from getting hit by a shoe::

Shinbashi: ::hops away from her:: Pi piii pi piipii pi pi PIII!!! {Between our two dead Jipangu inhabitants, Shidou and…Tarou-chaaan!!}

 

TO BE CONTINUED…