Review - Goodbye Lover

Patricia Arquette will never be as well-rounded a performer as her brother David. David, in his short career, has appeared in three good films (Scream, Scream 2, and Never Been Kissed), has made Courteney Cox, his co-star, into is fiancee, has become a spokesperson for AT&T, and has developed a following. Basically, he has only made good choices.

Patricia, however, has been AWOL for so long that people have forgotten she exists. Also, she has no depth as an actress, and makes bad choices along with it.

For example, in Goodbye Lover, Ms. Arquette is reduced to prancing around in stilletto heels with and irrepressible vixen look on her face. Everyone around her is made to stop and take notice, and anyone who wants to sleep with her probably can. But beware; just because you sleep with her doesn't mean you'll live to tell about it.

This is because Sandra, Arquette's slutty character, is secretly a maniacal killing machine. By the end of the movie, you want to wonder what exactly made this woman so screwy and money-hungry. But, actually, you don't even care.

You know your career is over when no one cares or even mentions your presence on the news after your own movie's premiere party. This is what happened to Patricia. But guess who did get mentioned? Her brother David.

Patricia, sweetie, let me give you some advice: Get out. Right now. Because, honey, your little brother's gonna eat you alive. And no number of songs from The Sound of Music can save you now.

Grade - C-

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