NSYNC's Driver's Applications

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NSYNC's Driver's Applications Driver's License Applications

Hey peoples! Alex here. I got this LA Driver's License App. from a friend and I thought it'd be perfect for the guys. I made a few adjustments, and anytime it says "your camera" just think of it as Steve. =0) I changed the fonts for the guys' answeres, but apparently they're really special fonts so if ya can't see 'em, click on the link with the guy's name. They are'nt bugged or anything, so don't worry. And it's in a ZIP file, with instructions. If ya don't have like WinZip or anything, e-mail me... I'll send ya the font. Ok, I'm done. Enjoy!

Justin's APPLICATION:

Name: Justin Randall Timberlake
Stage name: "Thrrrrrustin Justin," but I'm thinking of changin it to "Bon-Bon-Baby-Blue-Boy" *Ed. Note: Justin's still undecided between ghetto-dawg and latin-heart-throb. Can we say "Identity Crisis"?*
Manager: Johnny Wright Attorney: Oh, you mean those guys who told us we were gettin ripped off and that we should switch labels? Yea.. they're cool. What about them?

Present address:
Orlando

Past address:
Memphis

Future address:
The Hood in Mexico, yo!

Sex: [X]Male [ ]Female [ ]Formerly Male [ ]Formerly Female

Please name brand of cell phone: Nokia... with a special baby blue face plate
(If you don't own a cell phone, please explain.)

Please check hair color:
Females:    [ ] Blonde [ ] Platinum Blonde
Teenagers:   [ ] Purple [X] Baby Blue [ ] Skinhead
Males:   [ ] Bald [ ] Multi-Colored [ ] Black

Vision: (Check all that apply)
[X] 20/20 (check if you've already been on the TV show)
[ ] Coke bottle glasses (can't see shit)
[ ] Lasik surgery (recently - still recovering from quack job)
[ ] Eye piercing or tatooing
[ ] Blind (have a registered seeing-eye dog)

Please check activities you perform while driving: (Check all that apply)
[X] Eating Eat, Eat, EAT/All Day Long/Eat, Eat, EAT/While I sing this Song...
[] Applying make-up
[X] Talking on the phone
[] Slapping kids in the backseat
[X] Having sex Awww Yea...
[ ] Applying cellulite treatment to thighs
[ ] Changing clothes
[ ] Tanning
[X] Watching TV Mah Benz is tha bomb!
[X] Cussing out other drivers
[ ] Reading Variety
[ ] Surfing the net via laptop
[X] Steering with knees only
[X] Loading your gun Best be gettin out my way, Essssaay *Ed. Note: Justin got stuck as a cholo while trying to be ghetto as he was listening to Ricky Martin.*
[ ] Sleeping

Please indicate how many times you expect to be attacked by rabid teeny-boppers while driving: at least 2,567,893,450,925 a day

TEST

If you are the victim of a car jacking, you should immediately:
a) Call the police to report the crime
b) Call Channel 4 News to report the crime, then watch your car on the news in a high-speed chase
c) Call your attorney and discuss lawsuit against cellular phone company for 911 calls not going through
d) Call your therapist
e) Grab your gun and go after the MFers
[E]

In the event of an earthquake, should you:
a) stop your car
b) keep driving and hope for the best
c) immediately use your cell phone to call all loved ones
d) look for cracks in the road
e) pull out your video camera and obtain footage for Channel 4 News Broadcast
[D] And If I see any, then A. Me and Benzito are too important to go down.

In the instance of rain, you should:
a) never drive over 5 MPH
b) drive twice as fast as usual
c) never have your car washed
d) not sure what 'rain' is
e) be sure to apply waterproof make-up
[C] Don't want no water-spots on mah babay.

Please indicate number of therapy sessions per week: 7... She's helping me through my cultural identity crisis

Are you presently taking any of the following medications?
[ ] Prozac
[ ] Zovirax
[ ] Lithium
[ ] Zanax
[ ] Valium
[ ] Viagra
If none of the above, please explain:
My doctor has me on hypnosis treatment

Length of daily commute:
[ ] 1 hour
[ ] 2 hours
[ ] 3 hours
[X] 4 hours or more
[ ] depends on when the car is stolen

When stopped by police, should you
a) pull over and have your driver's license and insurance form ready
b) ask if this is a made-for-tv movie scene
c) start singing 'Bad Boys, Bad Boys, whatcha gonna do...'
d) try to outrun them by driving the wrong way on the 405
e) have your video camera ready and provoke them to attack, thus ensuring yourself of a hefty lawsuit
[C]

JC's APPLICATION:

Name: Joshua Scott Chasez (Pronounced SHUZAAY!!)
Stage name: "JC"
Manager: Johnny Wright Attorney: There's a lot of those...

Present address:
Rehab in Orlando

Past address:
In Washington wiht Mom and Dad

Future address:
Out of Rehab in Orlando

Sex: [X]Male [ ]Female [ ]Formerly Male [ ]Formerly Female

Please name brand of cell phone: Qualcomm
(If you don't own a cell phone, please explain.)

Please check hair color:
Females: [ ] Blonde [ ] Platinum Blonde
Teenagers: [ ] Purple [ ] Blue [ ] Skinhead

Males: [X] Bald [ ] Multi-Colored [X] Black *Ed Note: I know you've all seen that bald spot on the back of his head...*

Please check activities you perform while driving: (Check all that apply)
[X] Eating
[ ] Applying make-up
[X] Talking on the phone Ya know I have to let Jerome know when I'm gonna pick up the new stuff
[X] Slapping kids in the backseat The rest of those guys count, right? I use a whip too.
[ ] Having sex
[ ] Applying cellulite treatment to thighs
[ ] Changing clothes
[ ] Tanning
[ ] Watching TV
[X] Cussing out other drivers Trying to cut me off? Don't make me pull put my whip...
[ ] Reading Variety
[ ] Surfing the net via laptop
[ ] Steering with knees only
[ ] Loading your gun
[X] Sleeping Sometimes ya just... ya know... nod off...

Please indicate how many times you expect to be attacked by rabid teeny-boppers while driving: Possibly twenty to thirty MILLION a day

TEST

In the instance of rain, you should:
a) never drive over 5 MPH
b) drive twice as fast as usual
c) never have your car washed
d) not sure what 'rain' is
e) be sure to apply waterproof make-up
[A]

Please indicate number of therapy sessions per week: 14... The Rehab facility I'm in makes me go twice a day. I mean, you all saw how crazy I really am in the video for IDMC

Are you presently taking any of the following medications?
[X] Prozac
[X] Zovirax
[X] Lithium
[X] Zanax
[X] Valium
[ ] Viagra I don't need that one, but I'm also on Cocaine, Marijuana, LSD, Meth...
If none of the above, please explain:

Length of daily commute:
[ ] 1 hour
[ ] 2 hours
[ ] 3 hours
[ ] 4 hours or more
[X] depends on when the car is stolen

Lance's APPLICATION:

Name: James L. Bass
Stage name: PooFoo
Manager: Johnny "he's always" Wright Attorney: which one?

Present address:
1486 Rainbow Lane

Past address:
I'm from Mississippi... M-I-CrookedLetter-CrookedLetter-I-CrookedLetter-CrookedLetter-I-HumpBack-HumpBack-I *Oh yea.. I can spell Mississippi.. "Mississipipi" LoL... ya have to speak Spanish to get that one (Me hice pipi)... Oh! haha!... Oh gawd... I have no life*

Future address:
Joey and I might get an apartment together... I hope so...

Sex: [ ]Male [ ]Female [ ]Formerly Male [X]Formerly Female

Please name brand of cell phone: HomoPhone
*Ed note: That is not a slur against homosexuals. Do NOT take it as such, it is for humor purposes only, I do not mean to offend* (If you don't own a cell phone, please explain.)

Please check hair color:
Females: [ ] Blonde [X] Platinum Blonde
Teenagers: [ ] Purple [ ] Blue [ ] Skinhead

Males: [ ] Bald [ ] Multi-Colored [ ] Black

Please check activities you perform while driving: (Check all that apply)
[ ] Eating And get crumbs on my clothes? No Way!
[X] Applying make-up
[X] Talking on the phone
[ ] Slapping kids in the backseat
[ ] Having sex
[ ] Applying cellulite treatment to thighs
[ ] Changing clothes
[X] Tanning I try to anyway..
[ ] Watching TV
[X] Cussing out other drivers Guess I'm not the sweet lil Mississippian you thought I was, eh?
[ ] Reading Variety
[ ] Surfing the net via laptop
[ ] Steering with knees only
[ ] Loading your gun
[ ] Sleeping I'm not JC!

Please indicate how many times you expect to be attacked by rabid teeny-boppers while driving: With my new look... about 50 or so... a trip

TEST

In the event of an earthquake, should you:
a) stop your car
b) keep driving and hope for the best
c) immediately use your cell phone to call all loved ones How bout the entire population of Mississippi?
d) look for cracks in the road
e) pull out your video camera and obtain footage for Channel 4 News Broadcast
[A, then C]

In the instance of rain, you should:
a) never drive over 5 MPH
b) drive twice as fast as usual
c) never have your car washed
d) not sure what 'rain' is
e) be sure to apply waterproof make-up
[E]

Please indicate number of therapy sessions per week: One... and she's from Mississippi too!

Are you presently taking any of the following medications?
[ ] Prozac
[ ] Zovirax
[ ] Lithium
[ ] Zanax
[ ] Valium
[ ] Viagra
If none of the above, please explain:
We prefer herbs and good ol' fashioned cooking in Mississippi

Length of daily commute:
[ ] 1 hour
[ ] 2 hours
[ ] 3 hours
[X] 4 hours or more You never know how the long the horse'll take
[ ] depends on when the car is stolen

CHRIS'APPLICATION:

Name: Christop-her Alan Kirkpatrick
Stage name: Craaaaaazy Chris, and then there's the new-and-improved Sophisto Christo
Manager: Johnny Wright... I shoulda been the manager though... I started the group! Attorney: Jim Carey! Hahahaha... I kill myself!

Present address:
Somewhere you don't know! Nanana-boo-boo!

Past address:
With Justin and his mom

Future address:
Somewhere you won't know! Nanana-boo-boo!

Sex: [X]Male [ ]Female [ ]Formerly Male [ ]Formerly Female

Please name brand of cell phone: CRAAAAAZYFONE
(If you don't own a cell phone, please explain.)

Please check hair color:
Females: [ ] Blonde [ ] Platinum Blonde
Teenagers: [ ] Purple [ ] Blue [ ] Skinhead

Males: [ ] Bald [ ] Multi-Colored [X] Black

Vision: (Check all that apply)
[ ] 20/20 (check if you've already been on the TV show)
[X] Coke bottle glasses (can't see shit)*Dude, you guys know those glasses he wears are prescription!*
[ ] Lasik surgery (recently - still recovering from quack job)
[ ] Eye piercing or tatooing
[ ] Blind (have a registered seeing-eye dog)

Please check activities you perform while driving: (Check all that apply)
[X] Eating
[X] Applying clown make-up
[X] Talking on the phone
[X] Slapping kids in the backseat Hey! I am the kid in the backseat!
[X] Having sex OoooOOoo... kinky!
[ ] Applying cellulite treatment to thighs
[X] Changing clothes
[X] Tanning
[X] Watching TV
[X] Cussing out other drivers
[X] Reading Variety
[X] Surfing the net via laptop
[X] Steering with knees only
[X] Loading your gun
[X] Sleeping

Please indicate how many times you expect to be attacked by rabid teeny-boppers while driving: With the new hair? I dunno, about 50-100 MILLION... heh-heh-heh... I kill myself....

TEST

In the instance of rain, you should:
a) never drive over 5 MPH
b) drive twice as fast as usual
c) never have your car washed
d) not sure what 'rain' is
e) be sure to apply waterproof make-up
[B]

Please indicate number of therapy sessions per week: I am a therapist!!

Are you presently taking any of the following medications?
[ ] Prozac
[ ] Zovirax
[ ] Lithium
[ ] Zanax
[ ] Valium
[X] Viagra Everything else comes naturally
If none of the above, please explain:
______________

Length of daily commute:
[ ] 1 hour
[ ] 2 hours
[ ] 3 hours
[X] 4 hours or more
[ ] depends on when the car is stolen

Joey'sAPPLICATION:

Name: Joey
Stage name: Fat-One
Manager: Jony? Attorney: hoo?

Present address:
a buss

Past address:
Orlandow

Future address:
Pimp Motelle

Sex: [X]Male [ ]Female [ ]Formerly Male [ ]Formerly Female

Please name brand of cell phone: Sammsing
(If you don't own a cell phone, please explain.)

Please check hair color:
Females: [ ] Blonde [ ] Platinum Blonde
Teenagers: [ ] Purple [ ] Blue [ ] Skinhead

Males: [ ] Bald [X] Multi-Colored [ ] Black

Please check activities you perform while driving: (Check all that apply)
[X] Eating
[ ] Applying make-up
[X] Talking on the phone
[ ] Slapping kids in the backseat
[X] Having sex
[X] Applying cellulite treatment to thighs
[ ] Changing clothes
[ ] Tanning
[ ] Watching TV
[X] Cussing out other drivers
[ ] Reading Variety
[ ] Surfing the net via laptop
[ ] Steering with knees only
[ ] Loading your gun
[ ] Sleeping

Please indicate how many times you expect to be attacked by rabid teeny-boppers while driving: abowt 25-50, rite?

TEST

In the instance of rain, you should:
a) never drive over 5 MPH
b) drive twice as fast as usual
c) never have your car washed
d) not sure what 'rain' is
e) be sure to apply waterproof make-up
[D]

Please indicate number of therapy sessions per week: therapy?

Are you presently taking any of the following medications?
[ ] Prozac
[ ] Zovirax
[ ] Lithium
[ ] Zanax
[ ] Valium
[ ] Viagra
If none of the above, please explain:
Is that food?

Length of daily commute:
[ ] 1 hour
[ ] 2 hours
[ ] 3 hours
[ ] 4 hours or more
[X] depends on when the car is stolen

Once you have completed this form, take it to the only DMV office in your area and pay the appropriate fees (bribes). Your license will be mailed to you in 4-6 months.

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