"Good morning, Ran-chan…wake up, sleepy head."

Opening eyes that felt glued shut, Ranma found himself looking up into the face of his mother, framed in the morning light streaming in the window behind her…dressed in a summer yakata, with a bunch of bananas on her lap.

And Akane, sleeping with her head on his chest, one arm draped across his body. Flinching, he looked up to see his mother smile, and bring a finger to her lips. "Little bird told me, " she said quietly. "Now, what’s this about you feeling sick all day?"

"Well, you know…" And felt himself blushing to his fingertips.

"Why didn’t you tell me? You could have called…."

"Well, I – uh – Mom! You wouldn’t want to – "

Silently, she began to peel a banana…and then broke off a bite-sized piece. "I seem to recall a time once when I was pregnant," she said tartly. "And yes, dear, I do want to know…say ah."

"What’s that – hey!"

Plopping a bite into his open mouth, she continued to break off another piece. "My mother swore by these when she was pregnant…I remember her telling me all about it when I was carrying you. Don’t pick your head up just yet. Let’s see how well you do with this."

He wasn’t at all sure about bananas first thing in the morning…but hey, it tasted pretty good. Chew…swallow…hmmm. Not bad. "Mom…bananas?"

"Better than crackers, don’t you think?" Plopping another bite into his mouth, she smiled. "I’m sorry I haven’t been by much as of late…your father has kept me busy, you see."

"How is he? Is he okay?"

"Of course, darling. He’s fine. Let’s have another…"

"Mom, Akane…"

"Is sleeping very peacefully right where she is. Don’t wake her. She’s fine. She isn’t bothering you, is she?"

Looking up at her, he could feel the frown forming on his face. "Isn’t there something wrong with this picture? Ulp-"

"She’s on top of the covers…and still in her school clothes from yesterday, I see. Poor thing. Bad day at school?"

Gulping down the banana, he felt like the world just shifted on its axis. Akane is sleeping with me…and Mom thinks it’s cute. I don’t get it…. "Oh, the worst, Mom. I think I’m going to have to quit school."

She studied his face for a moment pensively, then nodded. "We’ll see about that…how does shopping with me today sound to you?"

"Uh, sure…what for?"

"Well, I’m sure we could find a few things for you…"

"For me…aw, jeez Mom…not maternity clothes…."

Plop. "Maybe we won’t have to look in that specific department…but I’m sure you’d like to have some comfortable things to wear. You liked what I brought you the first time, didn’t you?"

"Yeah…but I don’t want any more dresses, okay?"

"Deal." Putting the peel aside, she reached for another banana. "How do you feel now? Still queasy?"

He thought a moment. "No…matter of fact, I think I smell Kasumi cooking breakfast…and it smells good."

The weight shifted on his chest, scrubbing sleepy eyes. "…mmm…yeah, I smell it too…"

"Hey, you awake down there?"

Yawning, Akane got up and stretched, keeping her blanket wrapped around her. "Guess I fell asleep, " she said, smiling. "Oh. Auntie Saotome…"

Ranma’s mother smiled brightly at her, cocking her head. "Hello, Akane dear. Would you like some?"

Standing, he was amazed. There was no mad rush to the bathroom, and the room wasn’t doing its normal spin, and his stomach felt…normal. And all it took was a couple of stupid bananas… Kasumi was making breakfast…and he was hungry. All of a sudden, he was hungry… "Wow. What a difference. Thanks, Mom."

She only smiled up at him. "Just keep a couple next to your bed…and make sure you have some before you get up. You get sick because you’re hungry on an empty stomach. You’ll have to get used to eating a little bit every so often…you get queasy when your stomach’s empty, you know."

"No, I didn’t know…"

"And school wouldn’t allow for that anyway." Akane just sat there in yesterday’s rumpled clothes like it was an everyday occurance…what was with her, anyway? "Guess that’s that. There was only four weeks left, anyway."

He was looking at her funny, he could feel it. "Don’t expect me to complain…I was sick of it, anyway." Akane only smiled back at him, and munched on one of the bananas, and absently opened one of the packages of rice crackers, handing him one.

Damn, if it didn’t taste good.

"Oh, I wouldn’t be so sure your school days were over, my dear. That’s one of the reasons I came by. Akane, dear…would you like to come with Ranma and I shopping today?"

"Shopping? The three of us?" Nonplussed, she looked at Ranma, then his mother's smiling face…and smiled herself. "Sure."

"Then let’s go down to breakfast…and as soon as you two have bathed and gotten dressed for the day, we’ll go."

Going down the stairs without being dizzy…walking into the dining room without the smell turning his stomach…food actually looking good for a change…and Alex was sitting at the table, accepting the miso, tofu and rice Kasumi gave him. "Morning, ladies…Ranma."

Akane froze on the stairs and looked distinctly uncomfortable. "Don’t you ever sleep?"

"Didn’t you?" Sniffing the bowl curiously, he took a poke at the contents. "Guess who your escort du jour is?"

"You’re going shopping?"

"No, I’m actually going skulking around…but it’ll look like I’m accompanying my dear friend Nodoka Saotome and her girls shopping. Hmm…."

"Yo Alex…are you gonna eat that or dissect it?" Sitting down next to him, Ranma took his bowl from Kasumi, and dug in. Quickly emptied, he went to hand it back to Kasumi, and he froze. Everyone was starting at him. Everyone, that is, but Alex, who was trying hard not to laugh as he neatly ate his breakfast. "What are you all lookin’ at?"

"You ate it. You ate it all." Kasumi just looked at the empty bowl, and then took it. "That’s wonderful, Ranma. Would you like some more?"

"Huh? Aw, c’mon…I haven’t been that bad."

"Oh, please…" This from Nabiki, sitting across from him. "You’ve turned green at the very mention of food for weeks." Smiling, she began to eat her own breakfast, neatly picking at the grains of rice. "That was almost like your normal self."

Scowling back at her, he took the second bowl…and it went down as easy as the first. This is great…but maybe I’d better not overdo it. "Thanks. That was good."

His reward was a dazzling smile from Kasumi. And he watched Akane just beam and shake her head. Now what’s gotten into her? She turned to look at Alex…and damn, if the two of them didn’t start laughing! What the hell…

"C’mon, you…if you’re done, I want to talk to you for a moment." Getting up, Alex offered his hand. Taking it, he wobbled a bit getting up…crap, center’s changed again…stiff.

"I’ll get the bath ready…shall I lay out some clothes for you, Ranma?" Handing her dishes back to Kasumi, Akane got up from the table as well.

"Oh, Akane…I already did that. And for you, too."

Blinking, she looked at Nodoka. "You did?"

She smiled and tugged at her own collar. "Yukata are just right this time of year…and they’re very comfortable. Flattering, too, if you know what I mean."

"What a wonderful idea, Auntie…thanks."

Smiling, Akane left the room.

"Y’know, there are some situations where you just need a Mom." Alex opened the door and stepped out onto the veranda…and then the garden. "Come on out here. It’s going to be a hot day, but it’s nice right now."

"Why do I think I’m not going to like this…"

Sitting down under the tree, Alex patted the rock next to him. "Come on…it’s not going to hurt. Much."

"Now what did I do…"

Looking at him, Ranma waited for Alex to say something, but he only looked back, staring a hole in him. Nothing more. Oh jeez, guess I gotta face the music sometime….Sighing, Ranma picked up a rock and skipped it across the fish pond. "Guess you heard about last night…"

Alex nodded, raising his eyebrows. "I don’t know, Ranma," he answered. "I guess I’d better start off by telling you I spent most of last night talking to Akane about you. It took me quite a while to calm her down - she's been really worried about you. Where has your brain been the past few weeks? Tahiti?"

"What? I’ve been doin’ just what I was supposed to be doin’"

"Wrong."

"Huh?"

The American leaned forward and caught Ranma’s eyes with his own. "You sir, have been trying to bull your way through this like you’ve done with every other obstacle in your life. Unfortunately, your body has other plans at the moment."

That smarted. Thought he was gonna chew me out for missing school…what the hell? Frowning, he pulled away, crossing his arms. "What do you know? I’m the one who’s gotta be pregnant…."

"Why didn’t you tell anyone you couldn’t keep food down? And it’s no shame to be tired…or to complain if the shoes don’t fit."

Jeez, I know he means well…"Look, buddy…you want to try it? You go right on ahead. I feel like such a freak of nature as it is…don’t want to make a big stink about it. Anyway, it’s my life…I’ll decide how to live it."

"Wrong again!" Alex only shook his head. "Didn’t you see the look on their faces when you inhaled that food in there? They all knew, Ranma. They all knew all about everything…but because it is your life, after all, nobody stopped you from doing exactly what you wanted." Skipping a rock himself, he added, "I’m confused. You gotta know they’d do anything for you. But you won’t ask for a thing…not even a kick in the teeth…why?"

Silent, Ranma turned away. "You wouldn’t understand."

"What, is this some kind of bushido thing I don’t know about? Sounds like a bunch of macho bullshit." Looking over his shoulder, Ranma only glared back at him.

"Someday, I sure hope you’ll tell me what this is all about, Ranma." Alex looked at his hands. "Maybe not. But there are a couple of hard facts to deal with here, and you’ve been ducking them."

"Such as?"

"You are pregnant with twins." He said each word slowly and distinctly. "That’s easily between twice and four times as hard as carrying one kid. Your body is primarily concerned with keeping them healthy, whether you like it or not. When you don’t eat or rest, they take those resources anyway…that’s why you’re feeling like you do."

He had Ranma’s attention…grudging though it was. "Your reserves are gone, Ranma. Keep going the way you were, and you’ll endanger your life as well as those two babies as well. And get this – they didn’t ask to get mixed up in this mess. So don’t expect me to keep my mouth shut if you keep acting stupid. It isn't just your life -- it's their's too."

"I know," Ranma answered, his voice grown small and tight. And you know that I know that. "Poor little kids, with me for a Mom --" Looking away, Ranma didn't see the frown appear on Alex's face as he looked at the ground between his feet.

He’s right…dammit, he’s right again… It was impossible to stay angry with Alex very long. The bravado left like water spilt from a jar…what was left sitting next to Alex was a very small woman with tears springing to her eyes. "I got obligations, y’know. Besides them. What can I do?"

"Slow down." Hands on knees, Alex leaned forward to get under Ranma’s nose. The face he presented to Ranma was open, honest and as receptive as he could manage. He meant it. Every word was spoken clearly, but calmly as if he was reading the newspaper aloud. He knows he has the high ground here…he has all the advantages, but he won't rub my nose in it. "You’ve been trying to live your life just like nothing happened. You were attacked – hell, you haven’t really recovered from that yet, and you’re pregnant. You’ve got to make changes…you’re so busy trying to prove to the world that you’re still the Great Ranma Saotome, that you’re ignoring the warning signs your body is sending you."

Looking at him, Ranma bit his lip to keep it from trembling. I am not going to cry…I am not going to cry…can't I just do that one thing? "How is it someone like you knows so damn much about someone like me?" he said quietly.

"That’s my job…" he said, and laughed, cocking his head. "And then again, you gave me that wonderful opportunity to get to know you better."

"I was you…and you were me." The memory was growing distant, but when he thought about it, it never failed to make a small part of him shiver inside. "I got to know you real well, too -- I think," he said, watching his view of Alex's face blur and clear as the tears fell. "Damn." Brushing them away angrily, he tried to make them stop but it was if his eyes had other plans apart from his own. Leaning forward, Alex gently blotted them with the plain white handkerchief he produced from a jacket pocket.

That made him start. "I do! I do so trust you - I'd trust you with my life, I know I'd trust you with Akane…these kids…anyone!" His voice caught in his throat, and he knew if he said any more, it would be through sobs and more tears. Alex saw it too, and he only handed him the handkerchief and put an arm around him.

"Okay, that's enough. I believe you. You trust me with the big things, that's your way. I'm okay with little things too, Ranma. Little things, okay?" Ranma could only nod, scrubbing his face with the handkerchief, taking deep breaths to try and stave off the tears. "This is good - this is normal. It's okay."

"Cryin' is not normal! And it's not a little thing -- " Blurting out the words from between gasps of air, Ranma tried to glare at Alex as best he could between them. "There's nothin' normal about me! Nothing!"

If anything, Alex's expression only softened a bit more as he smiled back at him, tapping one finger on Ranma's nose. "And it's normal to be angry about that. And I'd rather you cried than shoved those feelings down so deep nobody can see them."

"You'd get tired of it, fast enough."

"Think you've got enough to cry me a river?" It was an absurd question, but for once, Ranma actually considered it. Staring up into Alex's eyes, he thought about it, hard. It must have showed because as more time passed in silence, the more somber Alex's expression grew. "Ranma, that was a joke."

The man Alex saw superimposed over the face of the girl in his arms only shrugged. "You asked. God, I could do it from the embarrassment alone -- do you know how often I gotta go to the bathroom these days? Do you know how many times I've waited in line behind a bunch of giggly girls because I got to sit down to do it? Do you?"

Alex only blinked, keeping his attention focused completely on Ranma. It made Ranma want to squirm away and hide, wished the ground would open up and swallow him whole. "The guys talk when they think I can't hear them. I can't figure out if they're jealous or grateful." When that made Alex frown, Ranma continued. "Jealous 'cause someone did it with me and they wanna know what it's like --

"Grateful 'cos they didn't have anything to do with it and it didn't happen to them. But even that's not the worst part." Looking away, Ranma coughed and choked as his throat tightened against his best attempts to keep from sobbing. "Listen to me…this is what happens when I get mad, now. Every time. Bawling like a fucking baby!"

"The worst part," Alex said quietly. "Go on."

Turning to face him again, Ranma bit his lip and stood up. "Look at me," he said in a tone so soft and deadly Alex began to wonder if he'd gone too far. "Go ahead, look at me."

Alex looked up at Ranma and slowly shook his head. "You know you make me dizzy just looking at you, buddy. What do you want me to see?"

"You know what I mean. God, Alex…please. Look at what that bastard's done to me…" Angrily wiping away the tears, Ranma dried his hands by rubbing them on the t-shirt Akane had dressed him in the night before. Wiped them quickly, once. Then, once again, he gingerly let his hands travel down the front of his body, slowly pressing the shirt against the curves so they were thrown into clear view. "Is there anything normal about this?"

"Showing? Jeez, Ranma…you're pregnant. Four months gone, with twins. I--"

"Since we stopping burning the incense for them. It started then -- I can't wear any of my clothes anymore, Alex. I don't even recognize myself in the mirror."

That long? That was months ago… "Ranma, what is it? Yes, you're normal…for a young girl pregnant at nineteen as a result of a rape. Shit, you're above average. I'd be a basket case by now." Cripes, now I'm babbling…

Ranma didn't respond. Standing with both hands on his belly, he stared back at Alex , tears continuing to fall unchecked. Then slowly, he moved both hands. Resting the wrists at the sides, he tried to interlace the fingers over the curve -- and they no longer met. "A week ago, my fingers touched. A week before that, I could fold my hands over it. I've read the book -- none of the pictures look like me."

"None of those pictures show twins, Ranma." But now Alex was standing too. "I don't think I like where this is leading."

"You don't believe me."

"Oh no, don't even go there." Closing the distance between them, Alex cupped his hand under Ranma's chin, gently making him look up at him. "Whatever you're thinking, Ranma…even if it turns out to be pure garbage…I'm listening to you. I'm taking whatever you say very, very seriously. I believe you when you say you're concerned…or if you have questions. But you don't really think - "

Ranma closed his eyes, and Alex could see the struggle going on inside him even so. Frowning, Ranma was biting his lower lip so hard Alex was almost expecting blood. "I feel like my body's been hijacked," he said, hissing through clenched teeth. "I don't even know how it happened…and every day is another surprise I never asked for."

"No wonder you're feeling queasy. Looking at it that way makes me sick, too." Ranma choked on a laugh that was halfway to a sob and coughed, but brought a hand up to clasp the wrist of the hand Alex was still using to hold his head up as he opened his eyes.

"Then it doesn't sound stupid?"

"No, it doesn't sound stupid…stupid."

Blue eyes opened wider. "Watch it. Only Akane gets to call me that."

He only cocked an eyebrow in return. "Oooh, do tell. Is that her pet name for you?"

The truth would have hurt, if it hadn't made one laugh harder. "You'd think! Jerk. I'd deck ya, 'cept I like you too much."

Alex chuckled and took a hammy grab at his chest. "Wounded to the quick…I'm touched by your concern."

"Bite me."

"No, thanks." Watching Ranma grin in spite of himself, Alex gave him one last chuck under the chin before letting him go. "Seriously, though…why aren't you telling Akane about this? You've been keeping her out of the loop, you know…she knows it, and she's worried about it. She's your partner, buddy --"

The look on Ranma's face darkened. Biting his lower lip again, his head dropped back to his chest as he hugged himself. "She cries herself to sleep enough nights a week," he said. "She spends every spare minute looking over my shoulder…but every time I look at her, she looks away like she wasn't watchin' at all. I scare the shit out of her, Alex. If I told her everything that's going through my head these days, I'd do more than that."

"Like the fact you love her?"

"Not fair." Looking up, Ranma could look across the lawn at the veranda where Akane was standing at the door from the dining room. The rest of the family was still seated around the table, drinking tea and talking comfortably from what he could tell. But Akane was waiting for him. "I make sure I tell her every day. And she tells me -- and I know she means it. But it's just not fair."

Alex sighed. "She said a lot of the same things last night, Ranma."

"Don't I know it," he muttered. "Alex, it kills me that she’s cryin’ – and there’s nothing I can do about it. She thinks I don't know how bad it is for her - thinks she's got it all covered. She don't, man. She don't."

"She'd feel better if you let her help."

"I let her help, Alex. I do…but I don't want…y'know. She's got enough to do, right? I got to pull my own weight. Take care of myself. That sort of thing."

Ranma sensed the hand Alex rested on his shoulder before he felt it tighten. "Look at me," he heard him say quietly. Ranma considered it before turning and the pressure increased just enough to convince him that he needed to obey or suffer the consequences.

"You said this wasn't gonna hurt."

"Much."

"Jerk."

Doing as he was bade, Ranma turned clumsily to face Alex again, slowly trying to look up at him, but hesitated at the collar of his shirt. Chuckling, a hand found Ranma's chin and tipped it up so that he had no other choice but to look Alex in the eye. "Boo."

"What?"

He wasn't angry. Staring up at his friend, Ranma fully expected a blast and more lecturing, but Alex was only smiling and shaking his head. He is older than me, isn't he? The eyes crinkled at the corners, and there wasn't a trace of irritation anywhere to be found. "Alex, if you're gonna yell at me, hurry up and get it over with, willya?"

"Who wants to yell at you? I keep trying to get it through your thick head that the last thing anyone wants to do is be angry with you -- nobody thinks you're a burden, nobody wants you to do any more than you are already. You've done the best job anyone could possibly have done with this situation - so far."

"But --"

"You can't do it alone. And nobody's asking you to. That's all."

"I just don’t know what to do, Alex. I try to be strong for Akane and everyone, but…I’m terrified. I’m afraid and I don’t even know what I’m afraid of."

"That, Ranma, is probably the first sensible thing you’ve said today." Watching Ranma closely, he was rewarded with a wan smile as Ranma wiped the tears away with the palms of his hands. "She’s scared too, Ranma. Maybe you ought to talk to her about it sometime. It might help you both to be scared together." Looking at Alex out of the corner of one eye, Ranma smiled wryly, nodding.

"You have no idea how much I’d like to put you back to bed for a week…how’s breakfast sitting?"

He thought about it for a moment. "Good. So far."

Tapping the tip of Ranma’s nose with a finger, Alex smiled. "I've got a feeling. Today, something magical is going to happen…just you watch. And I’m not going to have to do a thing."

"You know something I don’t?"

He laughed. "Oh, a lot of things…but today isn’t one of them. It’s new for me every day – just like it is for you." Looking away for a moment, Alex then turned to meet Ranma's eyes again. "It's not all going to be this bad, Ranma. Promise."

"One step at a time, one thing at a time, one day at a time."

"Yup. Who knows what can happen? All that, and a side of fries…." Putting hands on Ranma’s shoulders, he pointed him towards the house. "Go get your bath, you. I’ll be waiting downstairs with your Mom. Nice lady."

"Yeah…she is." Walking away from him, Ranma turned once and looked over his shoulder. "Guess I should have been talking to her about this, huh?"

He only closed his eyes and shook his head. Smiling, Ranma went into the house. But as he went, Alex noted the stride was definitely taking on a roll away from normal, towards the pregnant waddle he was sure Ranma wouldn’t want to know he had.

Putting chin to hand, he wondered himself how he’d missed it. Ranma was certainly good at misdirection. Then again, you never knew what was going through Ranma's head until he opened his mouth. But he made a mental note, counting the weeks on his fingers. I need to spend more time here, they’re a whole lot more frightened than I like. Almost afraid of their own shadows. Tapping a finger on his chin, Alex frowned. That doesn’t fit. But then again, what would at this point? Only 16 weeks…so much change in only 16 weeks…."Time’s getting away from all of us…damn." Sighing, he started back to the house himself, deep in thought. "Where is he….where the hell does he go?"

Because he knew…sooner or later…he’d be back. And there would be another body to bury…or, please…a body to mend this time.

I’m going to get you…kamigaki…whatever you are. I’ve got to….

<HR>

"Thanks Akane. How did you know?"

Akane took a pull from her ramune bottle. "I took a wild guess."

Walking into the bath, Ranma had first noticed the clothes sitting out waiting for both he and Akane when they finished bathing. And the sign on the door – "Ranma Only" – with a little ramune sticker attached to it. They were alone – and wouldn’t be disturbed.

Akane was already soaking in the furo, which was fine with Ranma. Not knowing quite how he got into the clothes he was wearing, getting out of them might prove to be a struggle. And struggling with his clothes was not something he wanted Akane to see. He smiled as he looked at her. Holding her bottle loosely between fingers and thumb, her eyes were closed as she sighed in sleepy delight. Baths had been quick affairs as of late for him, taken alone when nobody else wanted to use the furo. It was strange to feel vulnerable without his clothes, almost ashamed at how he looked. There had been wounds, then scars…now there were other things that made him uncomfortable to be naked. He felt odd and out of place without so much as a towel to cover up, even though he knew he had nothing to hide from Akane. Quickly disrobing and scrubbing clean, he slipped in next to Akane and took the bottle of soda she offered him without opening her eyes.

Taking a long drink, Ranma relaxed into the heat of the bath, sitting next to Akane, who looked perfectly content, head resting on her folded arms at the edge of the tub, eyes closed. Smiling, even.

"Akane…"

"Mmm?"

"Can I ask you something?"

Turning her head to look at him, she didn’t pick her head up, but just slowly opened her eyes a fraction. "Sure. What’s on your mind?"

"Would you marry me…if you didn’t have to?"

Oh please, don’t let her get too mad at me…But she only frowned a bit. "That’s a loaded question," she said. "Why do you ask?"

"Cos I wanna know."

She looked away briefly, but then opened her eyes and met his – with a smile. "I don’t know what I could say that you would believe, Ranma. But the simplest answer is yes – yes, I think I would."

"If I wasn’t pregnant, and our parents didn’t make this whole thing up for us, and all that stuff…you’d still want to marry me?"

She made a rueful face and shook her head. "Baka." And then she looked away. "What about me? Would you marry me, Ranma?"

"Are you asking?"

"What, do you want me to propose to you or something?"

Leaning on his folded arms, Ranma looked straight ahead. "Well….yeah. Yeah, I guess I would. I mean, it would be nice to be asked if I wanted to do something, for once. Y'know?"

"You’ve got to be kidding." But the expression on her face turned almost playful. Yeah, I wouldn't mind being asked myself!

Looking back at her, he found himself smiling. "I’ll ask you, if you like, Akane."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

Looking at her, Ranma felt something warmer than the bath water flow through him. She’s really cute…and the way she’s looking at me…she doesn’t look at anyone else like that. Maybe it is true….

Trying to reconcile the two images vying for her attention – it happened a lot when she was thinking this way – Akane tried to look Ranma in the eye as she took a deep breath. She saw Ranma as a girl, sitting in the tub next to her, red hair wet and plastered to her head. But just at the corner of her vision, she saw Ranma as a man…faint, but there…overlaying the girl with a gentle golden glow. And he was looking at her with nothing short of absolute love in his eyes. But then again, so was the girl. No matter what, Ranma is Ranma after all…and Ranma loves me.

Ranma loves me.

"So, what are you waiting for?"

The picture dissolved as Ranma gave a guilty start and flinched. "Me! Waiting? Uh…no, I'm not waiting. It's just --"

"Feels odd." Akane supplied. "I know. It's the last thing I expected, Ranma. That it would be okay, y'know? That getting married is what I want."

Ranma's eyebrows were just about even with his bangs. "You want to get married? You're joking."

"Not if it's to you, it's not." Akane continued to look Ranma in the eye, trying as hard as she could not to stiffen or betray any of the tension she felt inside. Marriage! Children! Forever...with Ranma...oh, gods. I must be mad! "Ranma…it'll be okay. I don't mind it anymore, really. I'm kind of looking forward to it."

"Like you'd look forward to a grudge match," he answered, carefully draining the bottle to the last drop as his tone became serious. "You want to see if you're up to the challenge."

Holding her head still, she fought the urge to jump out of her skin and bolt from the room. Oh, he has me there…but that's not the only reason, is it? "Is that what you really think?" And then when he didn't respond, the light dawned. "I'd be lying if I didn't agree with you, Ranma…but that's not the biggest reason, you know. It's what I think about when I wake up, when I go to sleep…"

"When you wake up crying." Watching his eyes narrow, Akane knew the blood was draining from her face, as she fought not to slap him.

"That's not fair," she heard herself reply. You're not supposed to notice that. You're not supposed to…

"Are you going to deny it?" He looked back at her, the blue of his eyes gone hard as ice. "How could you possibly…want someone who does that to you?"

The tears filled her eyes and spilled down her cheeks, she couldn't help it. "That's not what you do to me. Your love does not make me cry."

His mouth twisted into a wry smile as he touched her cheek with one finger and showed it to her. "Then what's this?"

She bit the words back, the ones she would have used before. I can't hit him - even with words! I can't -- gods, let me find the right thing to say, I can't make a mistake now -- The tears continued to fall as she struggled to find an answer, staring straight ahead into Ranma's eyes. He looked away first, then turned away. "You don't have to answer that, y'know." He said it softly as he slumped back into the hot water, folding his arms on the edge of the furo, then resting his forehead on them.

"If I didn't care…" The sounds were harsh, forced air with little tone as she made herself speak.

"Don't tell me it's because you love me, Akane. Love makes people happy."

"I am happy, you jerk." Clenching the washrag in her hands, she still didn't move as she trembled, fighting to regain her voice and composure. "But I am so scared…"

There. The hated words had slipped out without her permission and she couldn't take them back. "I'm such a coward," she added, hissing the words as her throat tightened, and she dipped the washcloth into the water, wrung it dry and threw her face into it.

"There you go again." Ranma spoke softly, not raising his head. "Can't you just get it? I don't want this marriage thing, Akane -- not if this is what it does to you. I don't want it."

And what else could I do and live with myself afterward? "Isn't that what it's all about, Ranma? What if it were me? How would you feel?"

Thin shoulders hunched as the hands tightened into fists. "One, " Ranma said distinctly, "if we were getting' married because you were pregnant, it would be because I was the father. Two, if anyone hurt you because they got past you and got a lick or two in, I'd kill 'em. And then…" One fist scrubbed eyes as Ranma threw himself back upright and locked eyes with Akane. "Then I'd set you to training so it would never happen again. Ever." Blinking rapidly, Akane watched the stern set of Ranma's face fall as if it were melting wax. "But we're not talkin' about you, are we?" Leaning back, Ranma winced as a hand went to a space below his breastbone and Akane felt her breath catch in her throat as she finally saw what she had suspected last night.

He's kept this from me. How did he keep it from me? She swore she could count his ribs and the finely toned arms were so lank, she was afraid to touch them. Paling as she watched, Ranma expression turned inward and Akane knew innately then why Ranma had put so much distance between them. He's sick. He's really sick and didn't want to tell me. And he's more than just "showing" -- he's huge! "What excuse could I possibly have for getting like this? Akane…I'm so far past scared…I just wonder if I can keep it together long enough, and every day I find out I probably can't." He took a sharply inward breath, pain flashing across his face as she clearly saw a spasm force air out of his lungs. "Shouldn't have eaten so much breakfast…now I'm probably gonna lose it too…."

"No, you won't. Come here…jeez, you're like ice!" Gently, but firmly, she leaned Ranma against herself, and lowered them both down into the warm water up to their chins. "I'm going to lean up against the wall here…you just lay back and relax and take some deep breaths. It'll pass."

Cold. "I hate this." But with his head on her shoulder, Ranma slowly took one deep breath, then another without another wrenching spasm abruptly cutting it off. Even in the warm water, he shivered. "I hate this, Akane. The only time I'm not puking my guts out is when I'm asleep and even then, it wakes me up sometimes…." Taking another deep breath, he released it in a sigh. "It's supposed to be normal. Some of the books even say the worse it is, the better off the baby is."

"It's hurting though, isn't it?"

Covering his mouth, he closed his eyes as the other hand rested between his belly and his breastbone, wincing. "I got the mother of all charley-horses in there right now."

"I'm sorry. Feeling any better?"

Sighing again, he nodded. "Some." Turning his head to look Akane in the eye, he blinked as he continued to absently apply counterpressure. "There's no challenge to this, Akane. There's nothing to fight. It's won, even before I started." The eyes opened wider, but didn't focus and tears brightened them, though they didn't fall. "That bastard's killed me. I just haven't died yet." The voice was barely a whisper.

"You don't mean that, surely." Surprised to hear her own voice so thin and scared, Akane held him closer.

"I'm so sick of this." So thin…gods, I hadn't noticed. He's gotten so thin! The tears fell, and with them, the last hope Akane had that there was still some piece of Ranma left unwounded. "Akane, I'm no good at this. I'm no good for you at all."

Dipping her free hand into the warm water, she gently washed the tears away. "Ranma, it doesn't matter. You're doing good enough for me. You're doing fine."

"Then how come I don't feel fine?" The rhetoric went unanswered as Akane continued to gently bathe Ranma, making soft, soothing noises as she did so.

"I'm beginning to think you didn't eat enough breakfast," she said quietly. "We'll get you a little snack when we get out of here, okay?"

"Can we get out now?"

"Sure."

Leaving the furo first, Akane tucked a towel around herself, but got two for Ranma and helped him step out of the warm water. He flushed to his fingertips as she smiled at his embarrassment, wavered a bit and sat down heavily on the edge. "Dizzy."

Swallowing hard, Akane kept smiling as she wrapped first one towel around him, then the other over his head and towelled the hair dry. "I'm sure this isn't helping, but you'll be warmer…it'll be even better once we're in the sun, won't it?"

"Thanks, Akane."

"Hey."

"What?"

The towel covering his face fell away as Akane appeared in his field of vision, hair damp and mussed, eyes shining. Then she smiled. "Ranma, I love you."

"Love you too, you goof --"

Her cheeks flushed even pinker as a smile warmed her entire face. Then she leaned in and softly placed a kiss on his forehead. Oh Akane…if I wasn't a girl right now…. "Ranma, can I marry you?"

"Yes, you can, if you want to." He heard the words, felt them leave his mouth but he hardly believed he had said them himself. "Please Akane…only if you want it. Promise me it will be because you want it." Ranma watched Akane's face change suddenly, the eyebrows drawing together as the eyes widened.

"Are you all right? You don't look so good --"

His vision blurred, dimmed and danced in a pattern he had come to know well. "Jus'…a second." Then his stomach would clench and try to empty itself…can't! Don't! Strong, slender arms wrapped around him as his head came to rest on Akane's shoulder and hands began to gently stroke his back. "It's…still morning, Akane. That's all."

"Have you talked to the doctor about this?"

"Nah, the books all say it's normal. When would I get to the doctor, anyway?"

"And Alex knows, doesn't he?"

"Dunno."

"Ranma!"

He only chuckled. "Now that sounds normal."

"Oooh…wait 'til I tell your mother!"

Dressing in yukata began as an experiment in frustration when Ranma discovered that he couldn't tie the obi the same as Akane and neither of them knew what to do next.

"Jeez, it's like tying a string around a basketball! Ugh!" Pulling the sides together, Ranma stood in the dressing area in underwear and tabi glaring down at his stomach. "And don' try to tell me this isn't all that bad, Akane…"

"I wasn't even considering it." She sighed herself, holding the wide obi between two outstretched hands. "There must be a way to do this - your mother was the one who picked this stuff out for you."

A gentle tapping at the door interrupted Ranma mid-fling as he had nearly removed the yakata and was well on his way to discarding the garment. "Can I come in now?"

"Mom? Oh, you bet…hurry up!"

Standing between Akane and Ranma, Nodoka gave Akane a cursory glance and then turned to her son. "You know, when I gave birth to a boy, I wasn't expecting to be doing this at my age." But she said it smiling, and gently took the yakata from Ranma, holding it up for him to put his arms back into the sleeves. "No doubt about it, you're really a little boy under all this…"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means," she replied, pulling the sides together, judging the fit and then releasing them, "that a girl would have asked her mother for help." Reaching into the basket where she had laid the clothing, Nodoka withdrew a handful of pads and sashes she had put there.

"What's that, Auntie?" Akane asked, "I didn't know what that was."

"It's a little padding to straighten things out. Hold your arms out, dear."

Mortified, blushing a deeper and deeper pink as she worked, Ranma held still as his mother deftly placed pads above the crest of his belly and tied them firmly into place. He thought he saw her pale slightly, but she said nothing as she worked. Then she pulled the sides of the yukata together and motioned Akane to come around with the obi sash.

"There. That should make this considerably easier…" Using Akane as an extra set of hands, Ranma had to wait until they finished tying the sash behind him, listening as he heard his mother chuckle as she worked. Akane put in a word or two, and he was pleased to hear the strain leave her voice. By the time she finished the intricate knot, Akane almost sounded happy again.

"Oh, Ranma…it's so cute!"