This page is written mainly by Tim, Kat's man.
Kat's written bits, but not much!
Updated Saturday 14th July 2001.
Tim:
Hey. I'm Tim. And it’s 4.30am. Kat asked me to write a bit about people in here and spruce it up a bit, but I'm not promising anything. The hard part came when I found a lot of the people in here I don't actually know very well, so excuse the extremely small descriptions in here. For those who I do know, well, there's a little bit about them as seen through my eyes. And I can be twisted. Did you know I invented the question mark? Oh yeah, and that little squiggle thing: ~ yup I made that one too. I'm in the process of creating new Japanese symbols, such as the character for "to do the power twist (turn 180 degrees, punch the air and yell "YES!"), but it's a part time hobby. I come with fruity fresh fragrance, extra beverage holders, 3 year parts and labour warranty, and exchangeable clothing. A lot of people ask me what I like doing, and I'd have to say music, talking, friends, movies, pool, driving and Kat come under the top categories there, although not necessarily all at the same time.
Anyway, welcome to the "who's who" in Kat's quotebook. Notice I have quote of the year thus far, I dare you to beat me... I'd also like to point out that I'm not HALF as arrogant as that quote suggests, like all her other ones it was taken out of context. Still funny though. The best quote you will find in these pages though is not from anything out there, however, but here:
"People will tell you Comedy is merely Tragedy plus Time...
I beg to differ. I say Comedy is Tragedy divided by Time,
multiplied by Bewilderment, and plus... 8."
~Bill Bailey.
And on that note, I'll get stuck into it. Long live Netherlands Football!
[Tim]
Kat: [Tim]
This is who its all about, its her web page and all…Kat designed this site, found all the quotes and wrote them up... all I did was write a page.. she's the main quoter of the site, mainly because it's her site, and most of the conversations she's in usually have her talking at some point in time, otherwise it'd be kinda pointless being in them, now wouldn't it? :) The other quotes are ones she's overheard her kooky friends say, and me. Kat's a great person, as most people reading this will agree with me I'm willing to bet. Sensitive, smart, good-looking, talented, witty, humorous, what more could you ask for in a girlfriend – or a friend, as I hope most of you don't have the same status as me, otherwise questions will be asked... :) A very interesting girl, we've had some crazy conversations and I know a lot of other people on this list have too, judging by the quotes.. I'm hoping if I shine her shoes enough in the future, I might be able to get in on her long long thank you list on one of her albums, and maybe I won't be last, maybe I'll get as high as 5th-to-last.. wow that would be trippy.. anyway. Kat kicks ass, you all already know that, 'nuff said.
Jeeves: [Tim]
Jeeves is the original quoter. A very funny quote Kat heard from him one day in a library got her deciding then and there to do this project. This quote was about what was termed as 'buttfuckage'. This was quickly followed by the 'knobbed stick' comment. Surprisingly blunt at times, he's a perfect quoter for Kat's page.
At present Jeeves is working on future Hollywood Oscar winners, but until he can find someone to translate the hieroglyphics he sees in his dreams the plots are going to be a little confusing.. so in the meantime he produces short films, the most famous being the saga
"The Gatecrasher", including a role from budding actress Miss Angus as the "gatecrashed" Lauren. Good film, I tell you. I'd pay a dollar or two to see it.. anyway. Silly Jeeves. Bloody nice bloke though.
Davinia: [Tim]
Davinia/Dav/Her royal "stirrer", a "quoter" in her spare time, is a lady you'd remember if you met. She entered Kat's life a while ago, and has made a colossal difference to who she is today. I'm not sure if it's the witty mouth, the immense sense of consideration and caring attitude, her enthusiastic and optimistic look on life or just the way she carried herself, but it's pretty unforgettable.
Whether it was London, Florence, anywhere else in the world or good ol' classic Wellington she was staying at, the girl carried out her life in class and many people were much the happier and wiser to know her. You can kinda tell by the quotes, she's a real character. Then again, this isn't a biography, just a two-second description. Davinia kicks ass? I think that sums it up. Miss ya Dav. Ciao.
[Kat note]: Davinia Ellen Riverton (nee Hunter), b. 16/04/75, d. 20/05/01.
Sarah: [Tomim]
Sarah can be seen in the famous blockbusters: Wizard of Oz as the Munchkin 2nd from the left at the very back in the shot where you see all the munchkins (you might not recognise her doing the happy dance), one of the original members of "Gremlins", the dwarf lady in the short info-film 'The 7 and a half floor' in the movie "Being John Malkovich", and in the up-coming play sensation "Daughters of Heaven" where she plays a dirty little mother-killing lesbian. Now that I've got your attention... Sarah is an awesome girl, with a wicked and educated tongue (hence why we see her so often in quote book). Extensive time with Kat has brought force endless conversations rich in quotey goodness, and its very easy to find yourself laughing at something she says at least once a day. In her spare time, if you look for Sarah, you will find Craig, inseparable in more ways than one (you figure it out, silly). Definitely a great asset to many people's lives. Good friend of Kat's, and a legend except she is intent on calling me "Tom"...Grrr.
Craig: [Tim]
Sarah's boyfriend! He’s a Sarah addict, if you catch my metaphor... no he doesn't smoke her, silly. But she might smoke if he's quick enough... sorry. ;) Seems like a nice guy, and has some good quotes... passes my test.
Rach: [Tim]
Rach/Rachel is Kat's hilarious cousin whom I have met a few times and am under the impression she is confused by me... hell, who isn't. Rachel is very funny, and I recommend that anyone looking for a real dose of Rachel humour visits her quote book. When Rachel's around, funny things get said. They just do. I think funny quotes follow Rachel around, waiting to get said like fans waiting for autographs..
Accompanied by her loony cousin and wacky friends and sidekick boyfriend Hayden, she could make anyone keel over laughing. Beware.
Hayden: [Kat]
A nice intelligent, funny guy who just happens to date my cousin. But, i'm very protective of her.. so the claws are out on this Kat.. ;) be good, you..
Richard: [Tim] Rach's father and Kat's uncle. Not quite as funny as either of them, but funny enough to be promoted into quote history.. *speights voice* "good on ya mate…"
D. Gray: [Tim] Kat's Classical Studies teacher, and the most quotable teacher I have ever heard of. I think she’s confused by me. :) She's got an awesome sense of humour, so Kat and co. just love her. Nice lady, and she proves a point that age is not inversely proportional to humour.. (English: she can be old and funny). Check out her pic in the recent pics, it's very classic Mrs. Gray.
Hannah/Hanz: [Tim] If I were anyone else, I would have said Hannah and me don’t get on. We’re at each other’s throats enough.. but that’s not true, she’s one of my closest friends, and the same goes for Kat and her (the friend part, not the throat part). I have never met anyone with such flair and dominance, especially someone as tall as Hannah. She adores Kat, Kat adores her, and she’s got a mouth on her like the Southern Alps have ice. Future for Hannah? World domination would be a good one.. if she could stop getting herself involved in bloody EVERYTHING and ANYTHING.. she thrives on stress, its her mana (English: driving energy. Maori lesson complete.) Watch for Hannah in future quotes!
Vaudin: [Tim]
Vaudin is more my friend than Kat’s, although she has plenty of involvement with him in her life, with music, and he hangs out with Hannah 24/7... Vaudin has a good sense of humour, and has occasional moments of quoting brilliance.. but you do have to fish them out of the large amount of material he attempts.. Vaudin is a guy who’s willing to please, almost too generous. (Not in that way, sicko..) Good guy, God I see him enough (4 spells from 6 at school, enough to know him kinda well), and he’ll make a good doctor as he so plans to do. I can see him singing lullabies to patients in bed... :)
Eion: [Tim]
Recent statistics show 9 out of 10 nutritionists recommend Eion as a part of your balanced daily diet... woah woah woah hang on, wrong description... gotta stop reading the cereal packets when I write. Eion kicks ass. If he was a breakfast cereal, he would be Kellogg’s Just Right mixed with Rice Bubbles for noise and a cereal that plays the Monty Python intro theme.. a very good friend of mine and Kat’s best guy friend. Very nice guy, a little dirty, very smart, smiles a lot, and he’s a brilliant quoter when he gets down to it.. T’was very funny getting him pissed up on his 18th, he acted 10 years younger (his correct mental age, one begs to argue). Eion would be a great counsellor, tour guide or TV show host... People need people like Eion.
Nat[asha]: [Tim]
Growing friend of Kat’s, one of the better ones that didn’t pick sides in a stupid misunderstanding. Proves she’s got a wonderful thing called a brain in her head. Nat likes Dead Flowers, so I like Nat :) Goes out with Regan, a “nice guy” who gets into trouble a bit.. she smiles a lot, passes my test (notice my test changes from person to person, sorry).
Danusia/Dush: [Tim]
Danusia’s another growing friend of Kat’s, another one from her old school who chose not to be a sheep and proves she’s got a nice big fully-functional brain too. Very smart girl, tall, blonde, can quote…nice job. She’s with Greg Robins (not featured, yet), that should be interesting... Great girl. Good friend of Kat’s.
Steve: [Tim]
Steve's a friend of Kat’s from the Internet. ‘Nuff said. Oh yeah, and he likes to play peekaboo with his computer. Nah, I made that up.
[Kat note]: He's only quoted once, so don't worry if this explanation completely evades you.
Lisa: [Tim]
Lisa should, by law, really be blonde (though she says she actually naturally is, under all that black hair and the cool floppy hat). She comes out with the most hilarious things sometimes. A good friend of Kat’s, a talented composer with a fantastic mind. Rock on!
Julie: [Tim]
Julie is a lovely friend of Kat’s and mine who returned to her homeland of Canada last year. She, as Kat quotes on the page: 'provides me with hours of endless entertainment'. Very intelligent, fun and sweet, Julie was a gem to have around. Oh Julie, you can’t pronounce New Zealand correctly. Its “Nyuu Zulund”... practise makes perfect.
J. Romanovsky: [Tim]
The former Japanese and French teacher at my high school. She's lovely, but very kooky and says the weirdest things, especially seeing Kat’s taken them out of context. She no longer teaches at our school, unfortunately! Note to readers: don’t ever spend more than a one-hour lesson at a time with Mrs. R. I spent 2 weeks with her in Japan and promptly came home and died of frustration. She means well, and she can be very funny when she tries, but I’ve never met anyone else who hasn’t fully mastered the relatively simple art of “listening to what other people have to say”. Nevermind. Enjoy her quotes! :)
Mel: [Tim]
A friend from Kat’s Japanese class last year. She has a terrific way of thinking. She played an old woman in the role-play, a host of a crazy Japanese cooking show... very funny. You wouldn’t recognise her after she lost the gray wig and shawl, but she’s still a cool person to talk to.. haven’t seen her in a while. Shame.
Beej: [Tim]
Beej is the DJ of a respectable American radio station, and good friend of Kat’s (despite age difference of 10 ½ years) This man is sex in vocal form. To use an Eion quote, “mmm, Aural sex..” ..Beej is the man to see -or hear in this case- if you want good quality radio in the state of Utah... K I don’t know much about Utah, but I know that Beej should probably be mayor or something, because he’s certainly the coolest guy in the state, and the only one to make it into quote book status... Rock the party that rocks the party Beej. He’s been known to say on more than one occasion that Kat is hot, and I have a few words for him...
”Great taste buddy.”
Petra: [Tim]
A school friend of Kat’s and Sarah's best friend.. she also stars in “Daughters of Heaven”, as my bitchy wife. See the play! See the play! PS. Petra’s cool, pretty close to Sarah.. ooh, tough contest.
Chris: [Tim]
Among his many traits and secret identities, Chris is the smiling Chinese guy (not to be discriminative on the grounds of physical appearance and racial background, I promise..), and is up for award in the “Raybon Khan lookalike” contest. Often perverse, this guy is great at making Kat laugh. Cool to have around. He too is a filmmaker like his trusty sidekick and dog-boy Jeeves, and some of his work is very impressive, esp. for its underlying themes. His most recent craze is to find words that are just bizarre: “ointment” to give an example. Don’t really see enough of Chris these days, a shame seeing as he’s a great guy. Bloody university, stealing all the cool older people.. never mind, I get stolen too next year..
Nick: [Tim] Nick hasn’t been the same since a deep and meaningful relationship with a stuffed crocodile at a party somewhere in the middle of 2000, and is now forever searching for that taxidermic kick he once loved, if only for a night. Along the way of his epic quest Nick has been heard spouting hilarious quips of utter nonsense, and many other budding comedians have begun to bug him, hoping to steal his legendary gift of the gab. Nick’s more recent lack of submissions to quotebook has been purely due to lack of time he has been within earshot of any quote journalists. But never fear, somewhere on this wonderful earth, Nick is still being funny, and causing admirers to laugh heartily.
Francesca: [Tim]
Girlfriend of the infamous “Andy” (below).. I feel real bad I took the piss out of her crutches, but she deserved it because she fell for the stupid trick where you tap the persons opposite shoulder.. when she saw me do it! Jeez. Nice girl. Quoter? You be the judge.
Andy: [Tim]
As above, a good friend of Kat’s with a cool sense of humour and a unique way of looking at life. Kat hasn’t really seen enough of Andy, he’s another of the “University Abductees”. But Andy is a funny guy, and a funny guy has gotta go in the quote book... ’nuff said.
Dustin and Tim, Shannon, Dwayne, Jason, Paul, Tim, Jeremy...: [Tim] Dustin's very dear to Kat’s heart, her “brother she doesn’t have” :) The others are friends of his I don't really know at all. ;)
N. Hannan (M Hannan or Mrs Hannan in the quotes): [Tim]
One of the 7th form (year 13/US equiv is your senior year) deans at my high school. Ooh, she can be a real bitch if you scratch her back the wrong way.. not that you would actually physically scratch her back, don’t get unholy thoughts in my head.. but then, to the right people, she can be a very nice and caring person…even picked me up when I was hitchhiking one time.. but she’s a little eccentric, she’s my debating coach and she fell asleep during my debate when I was speaking.. way to make a guy feel crap…I’m sure her quotes are worthy of status, she’s a crazy rambling lady...
Chris H.: [Tim]
No clue. Some guy Sarah talks to online. ‘Nuff said. He probably wears ladies clothing and has a fetish for pine needles. These online guys.. glad I’M not one of them...
Chessa: [Kat]
A chick in Kat’s classics class. Chessa is the queen mother of all head-biting humour, but she’s OK with me because she can actually be really funny... as you can see in the quotes.
Nick R (on the page as Nick H, tho, by mistake): [Tim]
Guy in Kat’s French class, Nick is sure he is adopted from a French family, and by the way he can speak the language, I wouldn’t be surprised. Nick is a guy who is sure that he must be the worlds curse, and acts pessimistic in front of everyone even when he’s in a good mood.. but half the time he doesn’t do a very good job of acting like he’s suicidal, and everyone gets kinda confused by him.. boy, but he can come up with some interesting evil/funny quotes.. Nick could be much happier if he tried, something he has to work on... hangs out with Chessa quite a bit.
Richard P: [Tim]
This guy, a good mate of Chessa’s and Nick R’s, is the funniest gay guy I know. OK, he’s the only gay guy I know, you got me there. But it doesn’t mean he isn’t funny. And totally insane. Nice guy when he tries. Very blunt though, and that’s one of the funniest things about him.
[Kat note]: He's evil! evil, i tell you!!
Jonathon: [Tim]
A brainiac of massive proportions, Jonno blessed us with his presence 4 years in a row at HVHS, and this year buggered off to Finland to try out his education there. And there was great rejoicing.. yay. He’s an OK guy, can be very funny... but I don’t trust monobrows. They get this look in their eye.. A good quoter.. and he beat me in every exam possible damn it. ‘Nuff said.
[Kat note]: for some reason, even tho Johnno and i decided that we'd insult each other as much as possible, we got along very well. :) Kinda weird having Richard and not John in Classics this year.
Strachan: [Tim]
Pronounced "Straun". Nice guy, he's the new guy at school this year and he's in Kat’s French and Classics classes. He’s a bit of a celebrity these days, a real looker and witty.. note why he’s in the quote book. Some people don’t appreciate his newfound popularity though, but hey, you can’t win ‘em all.. seems like a nice guy to me.. ;)
Linda: [Kat]
Another friend who is just as blonde-acting as Lisa. But currently a wild redhead.
Angie: [Kat]
Angie is a great friend of mine. We originally met when i was dating Phil because she was the wife of Phil's boss. Now i've split from Phil, she's split from Bri but we're still great friends. A wonderful person. Love her to bits.
R. Kilgour, Kelly, Asher, Cameron and Nicola H...: [Kat]
The first is Kelly's biology teacher, i think. Kelly is Phil's cousin from Auckland (she's fabulous!). Asher, Cameron and Nicola are Kelly's friends.
Adam: [Tim]
A good friend of Sarah's and a very talented composer/musician. Adam’s a dodgy guy, a bit of a Goth (bit??), but god he can write music! If he got some better sound equipment, and stopped singing his own lyrics, I’d say future star. Doesn’t really like me. I get that a bit. Ah well, can’t please em all.. Got a few quotes up ‘is sleeve ‘e ‘as…
Josh, Matt, Olivia, Janet, Kelly P: [Tim]
Sarah's friends. ;)
Bronwyn: [Kat]
A very strange girl from choir...
Amy: [Tim]
A girl who was in Kat’s French and Japanese classes last year. Very dominant! Nice girl though, a minor quoter...
Kirsten: [Tim]
A chick in Kat’s Japanese class. A bit snobby-like, but funny nonetheless, and she’s quotable.. Might start a rumour about her.. OK, Kirsten flirted with members of sensation band Placebo, failing with the straight and gay guys, but Brian showed extreme interest.. and so did she until he brought out the black rubber and chains…I think she thinks twice about whether to make passes at celebrities or not nowadays.
CJ: [Kat]
One of my BEST friends ever. :) Just moved to Auckland from Christchurch to go to Uni (CJ?!? Uni?!? what?!?) and live an independent life. Just got back from a Nepal/Sydney/London/Italy OE.. wonderful gal.. miss her like crazy.
Jackie: [Kat]
Steve S's Mum! she was classic! when i hung around with him, she would come home drunk and offer us her alcohol stash. *wicked laugh*
Scott: [Tim]
Tasha's boyfriend and one of Phil's friends.
Glen: [Kat]
One of the guys from the group i hung around with last year - one of the best rock and roll dancers in the world. :) No, truly, he IS. I'm not just saying so. He has the 2nd place title!
Mrs MacDonald: [Tim]
'Nuff said.
Phil: [Tim]
Phil is an ex-boyfriend of Kat’s. They had some pretty seedy conversations, really, when they were together, but that was mainly her fault (apparently according to him…). She doesn't really talk to the guy anymore... court battles, etc… But if you’re looking for someone who can tell you all about the cars he wishes he was driving, or who can pick the lock of a house for those times you just don't have (or don't own) a key, then he’s your man.. he made a wise choice on the black hair.
Steve S: [Tim]
A good friend of Phil's. Steve is another budding filmmaker, and secretly envies and wants to be half as talented as Chris and Jeeves.. plus he thinks Jeeves looks hot with spiked up hair. Nah, I made that up. Small credit to Steve for his impersonation of a redneck. Can be a nice guy, especially more so these days now Kat has less association with Phil.. interesting that way.
Matt and Kat M: [Kat]
These two got married, finally. They were engaged for a long while and are extremely cute together. Matt works with Phil. Nice people, but they have a great deal LESS association (if they can help it) with Angie and i now that we're no longer with our Chubb[tm] men.
MaryEllen: [Tim/Kat]
Rach's step-mum. :)
Tash/Tasha: [Tim]
Kat’s former best friend. She's a really great girl apparently.. they don't talk anymore because of a huge misunderstanding. :) But.. life goes on. Her quotes remain. [Kat note]: i worry about what she's become because of the friends she has.. she's become manipulative like them and i hope one day she sees past their lies. Miss her, and hope one day she'll see the light and return to her former self..
Bob: [Tim]
A.K.A. Andrew Berry, a funny but dodgy guy. Tasha's friend. Kinda don’t see him around much anymore. Probably good for both of us. :)
Jen, Antoinette, Salainaoloa, Siobhan, Rochelle, Mrs Bartholomew, Nadia, Nicola, Michelle W., Pete..: [Tim]
Friends of Tasha and teachers at Tasha's school. General crew. Some good, some so-so these days. Ah well, if they quoted nobly, in they go.. ‘nuff said.
Maranda, Robert: [Kat]
Phil's friend is Robert, and Maranda's his girlfriend. :)
Kat's Mum/Mum: [Tim]
Kat’s Mum. Very witty lady, can say some very funny things.. half the time I’m sure she hates me, the other half she acts pretty nice, so all in all you have a very confused Tim.. no matter. Nice quoter ;)
Daniel: [Tim]
Kat’s brother. Very funny. ‘Nuff said. :)
Liam: [Tim]
Kat’s friend Chantelle's boyfriend. :)
Brian: [Kat]
Angie's husband (separated).
D. Clarke: [Tim]
Actually a biology teacher, Mr Clarke got sucked into being Kat’s class’s relieving Classics teacher while Mrs Gray was in Italy and France on the school trip. Didn’t know what he’d gotten himself into. I’ll let the quotes speak for themselves…
Ceilidh: [Kat]
Prononunced "Kaylee". A crazy scottish lass who has been my friend for quite a while! Look out for her in future, cause she's one funny chick!
Izzy: [Tim]
A *short* girl from Y13 at Hutt Valley High School, Izzy is good friends with a few of my friends, and mostly just acquaintances with both me and Kat. Izzy gets extreme sexual pleasure off bitching at people, and most of all, bitching at me. We have our moments when we get along, but then its back to “Shut up Tim, you’re not good enough..” Kinda makes ya feel like you aren’t worth anything at all... but then I ignore it. I can’t remember what she quoted.. hope it was funny. :)
Roshni: [Kat]
She's kooky, she's sweet, she's in my french and classics classes! Yeeesss... it's Roshni!
Blake: [Tim]
This is my father. You don’t want to know my father. I think he has one quote in here, and its very typical of him (he was smiling when he said it, so he is joking..). He’s a very smart and witty guy, but I think the whole family thing means I am forced by natural decree to take the piss out of him, and it’s his lifelong job to embarrass me in front of my friends, deliberately.. he’s too tall for his own good, too. :)
C. Harter: [Kat]
LOVELY man who directs the school's one-act musical that myself, Hanz and Eion are a part of. :) LOTS of fun!
Amy L: [Kat]
A lovely caring friend from my Classics class. :)
Emma: [Kat]
Want an Austin Powers impersonation? ANY of the characters? Emma's your girl. She's incredibly funny and does the craziest things.. like getting up in English, walking over to my desk and saying, *fat bastard voice* "I'm soooo sexy" before walking away..
P. Doig: [Kat]
My french teacher! Lovely lady, but she can be strrrrict!
Dave L: [Tim]
David’s quite a quiet fellow, so it’s a big achievement for quiet people all around that he made it into the quote book. Its also proof that we don’t discriminate against quiet people in this quote book, they too can be exalted into this faux “Hall of Fame”. David is a good soccer player, a better badminton player and a very good table tennis player, plus he’s pretty hot in the piano too.. a very tall Chinese guy, although I’m still a little taller than him, so he’s got records still to beat..
H. Sophacleous: [Tim]
Kat’s English teacher, and works with my play that’s on in a few weeks! See the play! Live the legend.. woah I shouldn’t steal other people’s advertising. Anyway, Mrs. Sophacleous is the most optimistic and positive person I have ever met, and she is remarkably patient with all the kids who find it funny to call her “Miss Snuffaluffagus” when they first learn her name. ALWAYS smiles, I think she got stuck in smile mode and the controls broke down.. very nice teacher.
Leighton and Armand: [Kat]
Chris' brother and his friend.
R. Stevenson: [Kat]
My music teacher. Nice guy, but take him with a pinch of salt. :)
