Sunday, October 29, 00 

Well, Saturday was pretty much a bummer day for me. I woke-up feeling 
really depressed and blue. I was dealing with the aftermath of Ed's 
visit and the fact that I really miss home. 

So, like any sensible 20-something year old woman...I went shopping. First, 
I had to figure out how to get to where I wanted to go...this entails a 
bus schedual, a city street map...plus, a lot of luck and patience. Luckily, 
it really wasn't that hard. So, I hopped on bus 36 and made my way towards 
Wal-Mart. 

First, I stopped at a gift shop and bought my roommate a cute little piggy bank 
(it's so small only one penny can fit in it) as a gift for letting Ed stay in 
the dorm suite and eat all her fancy chocolates and use all her shower gel. 
Then I went to a nice clothing store and bought a pair of black wool slacks I've 
had my eyes on for quite awhile. Everything seemed great in the world. I was 
a happy girl...then I made the tragic mistake of going to Wal-Mart. 

I'm not really a person who believes Hell is a place with lakes of fire and 
burning bodies...but if there is a Hell I think it would look a lot like Wal-Mart 
on a Saturday afternoon. The place was completely chaotic. 

To shop at Wal-Mart on a Saturday, a person really should eat their Wheaties. 
First step into the building I was surrounded by manic children and old people moving 
slower than slugs. Somehow I made my way towards the photo department to drop of 
the film of Ed and my weekend for one hourdevelopment. OF COURSE, the machine had 
broken 30 seconds before I got there. I left the film anyway hoping the machine 
would be fixed and the film ready when I was done(this was an act of pure faith 
on my part). 

Stamina is key when shopping at Wal-Mart. I had to dodge unattended children 
and switchback between aisles. My theory is this: There is a tribe of 3 to 6 year 
old children who live in the inner recesses of the building and come out during 
shopping hours to torment costumers. Where are the parents of these children??? During 
this whole time I somehow managed to get all the cleaning supplies I needed (Wisk, 
Lysol, Downy wrinkle releaser) and made my way towards the hygene aisle. 

The hygene section is incredibly small...and always seems to be stuffed with woman 
pondering whether to pay the extra $.30 cents for Herbal Essence or save on Suave. 
My mother raised me not to block people or open up packages but apparently that 
theory of child rearing has gone out of fashion and a more laid back approach is being 
used. One woman had 5 children in tow and was completely oblivious to the other 
15 woman waiting for her to move her damn ass out of the way. Her kids where hanging 
all over the damn cart and yelling out gibberish. I grabbed my shampoo and shower gel 
and hi-tailed it out of there. 

I finally made it to the check-out (and no the film was predictably not ready and 
wouldn't be for a day or so). I asked to buy some smokes and she said only the first 
two aisles could sell ciggerettes. I looked at the aisles and they were, of course, 
a zoo. I decided I would rather go a few days without smoking then deal with Wal-Mart 
another minute. I got the hell out of dodge and ran to the bus stop. 
--- 
So, my relaxing day of shopping turned out to be a day of torture. I was even more emotionally 
ragged than when I left to go shopping. I felt edgy and sad. Ed called to tell me he 
made it to California in one piece and that only made matters worse. I needed to talk 
to someone...so I called my friend Shawn in Bakersfield. 

Aaaaaah...Shawn. He's my favorite boy out of all the ones I know. He was supposed to 
be my husband but that fell through around the 8th grade. We've been friends since 
fifth grade. One day he was a short chubby cheeked tyrant and the next a tall, handsome 
studpuppy. He's been through so much and has managed to succeed in life...I really admire 
him for that. I love the guts out of him and he loves me too. I chatted with him and 
cried a little bit...afterwards, I was so tired and worn out...I just wanted to be 
home with my Mom and Dogs and Tina and Chris...sigh. I miss HOME!!! 
--- 
Today, I am going to be a subject in a psychological experiment. I will be sure to share 
that with all of you. 

Smooches, loved ones!