Something
was different.
The
air…? Yeah, the air smelled funny. Like honeysuckle? And something else,
something distinctive, something….
New car, realized Cordelia. She loved
new car scent.
But
there were no cars around.
No cars! That was it! There was no such thing as
a day in
Oh crap, she was in a
parallel universe. Great, just great, Cordy thought irately. And those gorgeous Manolos she was wearing were probably just an
illusion. Dammit.
“Mind
if I sit down?”
Well,
what was it this time? Being tempted with her ideal life? Impregnated by some
demon? Mocked by—“Anya?”
Anya
sank into the chair opposite Cordelia and signaled to the waiter. “A large mocha, please. With a great deal
of sweetened cocoa powder on top, and a generous amount of whipped cream-like
substance.”
Irritation
speared through Cordelia. “What are you doing here?” she demanded irately, not
especially sure of why she was outraged.
“Oh,
I live here. Well, not here—this
isn’t a late-‘90s sitcom about the serial relationships of a group of
twentysomethings with implausibly large apartments. And we’re probably not
really friends, for that matter.”
“No,”
Cordelia snapped. That had been a
long time ago. And she and Anya had really only been friendly for a few days
when Anya had abruptly lost interest in their friendship—due the whole losing
her demonhood thing and consequentially the raisin d’whatever of their friendship,
which Cordy didn’t find out the details about until some time later, when she
barely cared anymore. It wasn’t really much of a loss as far as she was
concerned, except that former demon friend or not, you’re not supposed to go to
the prom with your ex-friend’s ex-boyfriend. That was just Faithishly
stank. Cordy in no way cared by that point what Xander Harris did or who he did
it with, but it was stank. And it certainly didn’t bother her any longer.
“Why
did you go out with Xander?” Cordy demanded.
Anya
looked at her blankly.
“I
mean, there were plenty of guys at Sunnydale High, and most of them had
achieved at least a minimal level of social competence. But you chose Xander
Harris. Xander. Harris. What did I ever do to you?”
Anya
blinked. “And they think I’m self-absorbed,” she mumbled.
“What?”
“Cordelia,
it didn’t have anything to do with you. He was there, and I enjoyed looking at
him, and he enjoyed looking at me, or at least parts of me, and obviously there
was something there or we wouldn’t have almost gotten married.”
“Almost—what? What are you talking about? You almost got married on
prom night?”
Anya
rolled her eyes. “Don’t be ridiculous, that would have been illegal. My ID said
I was 17, and even if I wanted to I couldn’t have gotten my parents’ permission
due to them being dead for a thousand years. I mean last year. Or maybe it was
two years ago—I lose track of time these days,” she said airily, accepted her
mocha from the waiter.
Cordelia
squinted at her suspiciously. “You almost married him?”
“Yes.”
“Almost married him.”
“You
keep saying that. Are you experiencing some sort of a brain event? Is it—oh god. It’s because we didn’t send you an invitation, isn’t
it? I told Xander we should invite
you, but he was all, oh my god, that will be so uncomfortable, blah blah blah—”
“I
did not want to go to your wedding,”
Cordelia informed her indignantly. As if she just sat around hoping for
invitations from her castoffs and their runner-up girlfriends! “I didn’t even
know you’d seen him after graduation!”
“Oh.
Well, I understand; you had things of your own going on. Auditions and
manicures and answering the phone must take up a lot of time. But yes, we saw
each other. His proposal was very beautiful, and not at all prompted by the fact
that we were facing yet another in a long line of apocalypses and weren’t sure
we’d still be alive the next day.”
Oh.
“Guess some things never change,” Cordy muttered.
“What?”
Cordelia
was silent for a moment, thinking back to being trapped by a bug man and
sharing an ill-advised kiss. That man hadn’t just been a bunch of bugs, he’d been a slippery slope that slid her all the way
to Xander Harris. “Well … he does tend
to act rashly when he’s upset.”
Anya
rolled her eyes. “Tell me about it,” she agreed. “He asked me to marry him on
impulse, he left me at the altar on impulse, he … did many other things on
impulse that I can’t remember but are right on the tip of my tongue … and he
usually cared more about what his friends thought than what I did.”
“You
don’t have to tell me about that one,” Cordelia assured her, looking off into
the distance. She’d been so angry with Xander once upon a time. But now it
seemed like so long ago, and so many worse things had happened. And being an
adult made all those stupid, hurtful things they’d done as children seem so
unnecessary. “But he was kind of sweet sometimes.”
“He
is sweet,” Anya agreed softly, looking down at her mug. “Sometimes I didn’t
always appreciate him.” After a moment she looked up, decisively putting the
regret behind her. “Of course, sometimes he treated me like I was an idiot, and
it was an act of kindness of me not to make use of the many items in the Magic
Box that would render him limp, odorous, or uncomfortably warm.”
Cordelia
suppressed a sympathic smile. She should have trusted her instincts where
Xander was concerned; she had fought against the relationship as hard as she
could, but his surprisingly awesome kisses and equally surprising sweetness had
conspired against her. They’d been a mistake from the start. Even if they
hadn’t been such a mismatch, she wasn’t a Sunnydale girl at heart. She always
wanted something more. Besides, a guy who couldn’t keep his lips off some other
girl just because they were imprisoned by a drunken vicious vampire wasn’t the
guy for her, because that kind of thing tended to happen a lot in their world.
“Did
you ever wonder if you’d made a mistake—breaking up with him?” Anya asked
quietly.
Cordy
shook her head. It seemed so long ago, and it was hard to remember how innocent
she’d really been. “Don’t worry, I’m not
suddenly going to show up in Sunnydale and steal him away him away from you,”
she said, blinking rapidly to clear her eyes of what were not in any way,
shape, or form tears. She’d found other men she’d loved deeply, even if she’d
lost them.
But
nothing was ever as simple as puppy love.
Anya’s
smile was sad. “I wasn’t worried about that.”
Cordelia
began to feel uncomfortable under Anya’s wistful regard. It didn’t matter where
she was or why she was there; she just had to get away from Anya. “I really
should be getting back to the Hyperion,” she said a little busily, reaching
over to grab her smart little handbag. Ooh,
Kate Spade.
“Cordy
… do you know where you are?”
Cordelia
froze. Maybe Anya wasn’t such a flake after all. “Not
“No.
Not
“An alternate reality?”
Anya
considered the question. “I guess you could call it that. Most people would
call it something else.”
Cordelia
felt a chill go down her spine. “Can I get back?”
“No.
Well, I know one person who came back. But she didn’t get herself out; it was …
other people. Jury’s still out on whether that was a good thing. Anyway, you
can try if you want, but there wouldn’t really be a point. This is where we’re
all headed anyway. If you’re lucky.”
It
was a long moment before Cordy spoke again. “How’d you get here?”
“Helped
save the world.”
“And
me?”
“Bad
luck. At least that’s what I heard through the grapevine.”
“Bad—” After all she’d been
through, what she’d suffered, what she’d survived, what she’d given up, and it
was bad luck? Bad
luck?!
“You’re
upset,” noted Anya with a trace of surprise. “That’s interesting. I wasn’t, but
then I went into it knowing that might happen. I mean, you can only fight evil
for so before evil finally takes notice of you.”
“I
thought you said it was bad luck!”
“Well,
bad luck that was the result of evil. Evil gets around, you know. It doesn’t
just rest on its laurels. If it did, it wouldn’t be evil, just smug and
annoying.”
“Like
Harmony?”
“Yes, exactly.”
Cordelia
signed in disgust. “Great. So much for fighting the good
fight.”
“Oh,
I’m sure you did a lot of good. I mean, if not, you would have ended up, you
know, somewhere else. I certainly know I did many amazing things for which I
never received nearly enough credit. At any rate, I think you’ll enjoy it up
here,” Anya concluded blithely, signaling to the waiter for another
mocha.
Cordy
regarded her skeptically. “You do?”
“Beats
Comaville or Possessiontown—those were
the last places you lived, right? Anyway, you should really be going now.
There’s a lot to see up here. I believe that young man down the block was
hoping to show you around.”
The
glare of the sunlight impeded Cordy’s view out the window, and all she could
see was a blur. She glanced at Anya questioningly.
“Oh, the one by the corner, slouching and acting all casual. A rather ineffective
attempt, if you ask me.”
Cordy
squinted. When the man came into focus she gasped. “Is that—Doyle?”
Anya
shrugged. “He didn’t tell me his name. Incidentally, you should tell him that
shifting from foot to foot like that really isn’t an attractive look. More of a
woman deterrant, I’d say. Unless ants in the pants is suddenly a desirable
attribute in the opposite sex, which I’m fairly sure it isn’t.”
Cordelia
wasn’t listening. She ran out the door and into Doyle’s arms without even
remembering her purse. It didn’t matter, Anya knew; it would find its way back
to her. That was just the way things worked here.
Anya
felt a little twinge of jealousy as Cordy and Doyle disappeared from view. It
was fine, really; Anya didn’t mind. She’d be welcoming Xander soon enough—well,
not for years, but there was a lot to do in the meantime. She’d dated Xander
for almost the entire time after she gained her humanity; she had some wild
oats to sow.
Still,
it was good to see Cordy again. She’d have to remember to call her, so they
could have lunch.
But not for a while. After all, wild oats took time.
The End