Our Plan

. Over the summer we, Bobbi and Laura, had a running joke that we would kidnap the Boys as well as a few others. After living on Bobbi’s boat for a week, we decided a boat would be involved. At the beginning of the week there was a party. To be festive we put up Christmas lights on the metal railing in the pouring rain. Thereby electrifying the boat. When Bobbi’s parents returned her mother had a fit, like we were going to get hurt or something. On the other hand her father went out on front to figure out why half the lights didn’t work. Anyway, we decided to work that into our plan.

. The details of the plan were worked out during a late-night babysitting job on another boat. The children had fallen asleep and we had nothing to do but avoid spiders and plot. We were extremely tired and slaphappy. By 12:07 a.m. Bobbi was doing the Macarena to the music played by the near-by drunks. Thing is the song wasn’t the Macarena… By 12:22 a.m. we decided that if the parents hadn’t returned by 3:00 a.m. the boat and all its contents, including the children, were automatically ours. Kinda like if you live with your significant other for seven years they become your common-law spouse.

. Looking around our soon to be new boat we decided on sleeping arrangements. This stemmed from an earlier argument as to if you could fit four people in the front bed of Bobbi’s boat. We decided that it was definitely possible on this one… They go as follows: Bobbi, AJ, Laura, and Brian in the front. Howie would be given the option of sleeping between Laura and Bobbi or out on deck. We figured we’d be real nice to Howie. For some reason we haven’t found someone we know, or have conversed with more than once interested in living on a boat with 9 others just for Howie. (We will though) In the back room, where there is a one and a half person bed, and a two person bed we put Kevin and Kristin in the first bed and Nick and Amy in the other. Amy is the writer of some great fan fiction. She’s about 18. We figured she’d enjoy this, she likes Nick, and she has intelligence and obviously a good sense of humor.

. Now, for what has been said so far, we give the warning: Don’t try to use logic. It won’t work. For some reason Brian has been convinced to leave Leighanne and the others their girlfriends. We put Kristin in the plan because she’s married to Kevin. So it’s all legal and stuff, plus, Laura wants Brian, and this is our fantasy, not Leighanne’s. The other not logical thing (besides the entire story) we don’t want mail about is how they came to be in the boat and like it. We have a story of how they get there, but they just magically like it ok? No questions. (If you have any, make up your own answers. That’s how we answer questions)

. We recently decided that we would take pets as well as people. So, tally this up: Two shi-tzu’s, two Chihuahuas, four pugs, and one black cat. That is nine animals. Now, if Howie has a small animal (not big, big dogs can’t go, there’s no room) and I’ve left it out, please e-mail me about that so I can include it. Thanx) This boat is going to give new meaning to lack of personal space.

. Also, there’s the question of what stuff people will bring. Each girl get’s one bag and each boy gets a half a bag. Wait… this leaves an extra half a bag for clothes. Ok, Brian and AJ each get three quarters of a bag. Just because. Another stipulation is that the clothes are in the power of us. If it’s a warm day, we can just lock the shirts up, and they boys can’t have them. Simple. (Don’t you wish you were on that boat?)

. OK, so as you know, this boat that we’re in is on the Great Lakes. (Now you know.) Now, the bathroom holding tank on your new boat is kinda small. Therefore we’ll have to stop and pump out from time to time. As we said, the Boys like it, they don’t run away. If you didn’t get that statement, just go on, we don’t feel like explaining about the bathrooms on a boat.