What were you doing on the day Empire first went on sale?
How the fuck do I know what I was doing in 1989?

What was your last birthday like?
I dunno, I was drunk.

What's been the best thing in cinema in the last seven years?
Computers. I can't see that there has been anything made since 1989 that is better than what was made before 1989 - but it seems better because it was enhanced by computers.

Like Rainbow? (Hoskins' second film as a director)
No, not particularly, because we had a budget of about three bob. So trying to do fucking special effects with no money was a joke.

What do you think of Oliver Stone: genius or goat?
He's a genius. Mad as a March hare but a genius. On Nixon, I had Oliver Stone, this sort of intense genius, likely to blow up at any time and has been known to on quite a few occasions, and Tony (Hopkins) who's a daydreaming Welshman. Lovely man but he's away with the fairies half the time, do y'know what I mean? You gotta keep checking him out to see if he's still in your world. But the point is, with Tony if you ask him to do something, he'll do it but he'll do it ten times better than you asked him to do it. Oliver Stone's been used to bleeding his performances out of his actors. So with Tony, he couldn't believe it. The two of 'em together were pure harmony. People were saying, "Ollie's going around like a Buddhist monk. He's so happy with everything!' Tony loved him, he thought he was great. (Adopts Welsh accent) "Very unusual man.'

Who was your first crush on?
Who was my first crush on? What you talkin' about, the sort of bird you have a wank over?

However you want to take it.
Marilyn Monroe, I suppose. The first serious film I went to see, I went with my mum and I was only a kid. We went to see Niagara. And Monroe was fucking sexy in that, Jesus Christ!

Which character or star would you most like to have sex with?
Jessica Rabbit.

What's the most outrageous thing you've ever read about yourself?
Well, it's all outrageous. It's been a pile of bollocks from start to finish. It's all lies. If you don't make up lies about me, I'm gonna tell you lies anyway. You ain’t gonna print the truth because it’s not interesting. So what’s the point?

Nothing that's particularly irked you?
Fucking irked me, what are you talking about? We've all gotta earn a living, ain't we?

Do you care about reviews?
Yes. Never having had any training, just suddenly I was a professional actor earning a living. To learn how to do it, to get some kind of response or opinion about what I was doing, the critics became my teachers. I always read the critics avidly. There are three types of critic; the illiterate; the man who can write but don't know what he's talking about; and then there's the man who knows what he's talking about and can write - a real critic. You soon begin to know who they are. They're the ones you read and take notice of.

Does any piece of criticism stick in your mind?
Yeah, like I'm gonna get myself in trouble with the critics now. Fuck off!

Is there one movie that's changed your life?
It wasn't one movie. It was one performance that changed my life. There is a film called The Year Of Living Dangerously with Mel Gibson and Sigourney Weaver. But, there is Linda Hunt who played a boy. If you know anything about the techniques of the game and you watch that performance, it's like watching a brilliant chess player. It is one of the most astonishing performances I've ever seen in my life. But unfortunately I couldn't steal any of it.

Do you see a lot of movies?
I never go to the cinema. If you was a plumber would you come round my house and have a look at my pipes for fun?

Can you quote a line of poetry? 
'Auntie Mary had a canary up the leg of her drawers, 
When she farted, 
Down it darted, 
To a round of applause.'

Who was the poet?
My Aunt Rose.

Who is the most powerful person in the film industry?
The most powerful person in the film industry is someone that you don't know.