Chapter 10

"They're giving you a pregnancy test." Audra said softly.

"I'm not pregnant."

"Cmon, Cat, don't worry, they're giving you a lot of other tests too." Fawn massaged my shoulder as I sat in the hospital bed, whimpering.

"I'm not pregnant."

"Cat, I told you to be careful with him, didn't I?" Flora was the only one talking normally to me.

"Flora, shut the fuck up, ok? I'm not fucking pregnant. I can't be pregnant I am fucking Jimmy Fallon. He would not get me pregnant."

They stared at me for minutes as I began to cry, thankful to God that Jimmy wasn't in the room. What would he say if he found out? Oh God, Catherine, you're worrying about nothing. Your not pregant.

"I'm not pregnant." I whispered again to myself as the female doctor came in, asking me to take a urine sample.

~*~*~*~*~

I walked out of the doctors office, wondering whether I should break down and cry now, or later. It was a strange feeling, not knowing whether or not there is something growing, living, inside of you. I wondered whether I should go see Jimmy now and talk to him. I wondered if maybe I shouldn't tell him because he would worry about it too. I can't be pregnant. I wondered what would happen if I WAS pregnant. Would he leave me? No, Jimmy isn't that type of person. But then again, how well do I know him?

I found myself getting into the car completely confused and dazed, as I drove myself to Jimmy's house. I wouldn't tell him. I figured that telling him would only make him look at me differently. he had a career. I don't. He doesn't need me dragging him down. He doesn't need the headlines "Fallon Father of Ferry's Baby" I could see it now... I could see him become nothing because of me, and it was tearing me apart.

Chapter 11