I walked out of the doctors office, wondering whether I should break down and cry now, or later. It was a strange feeling, not knowing whether or not there is something growing, living, inside of you. I wondered whether I should go see Jimmy now and talk to him. I wondered if maybe I shouldn't tell him because he would worry about it too. I can't be pregnant. I wondered what would happen if I WAS pregnant. Would he leave me? No, Jimmy isn't that type of person. But then again, how well do I know him?
I found myself getting into the car completely confused and dazed, as I drove myself to Jimmy's house. I wouldn't tell him. I figured that telling him would only make him look at me differently. he had a career. I don't. He doesn't need me dragging him down. He doesn't need the headlines "Fallon Father of Ferry's Baby" I could see it now... I could see him become nothing because of me, and it was tearing me apart.
Chapter 11