~*~Member Contributions 2~*~

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Welcome to the Member Contributions page 2. If you have a song or poem about Richard (or a Richard-related topic like Match Game, Family Feud, Hogan's Heroes, The Running Man, etc.), and you'd like to see it posted here, just drop me an eMail with what you wanna say, and I'll gladly put it up.

LONG RED LIMOUSINE
(to the tune of Prince's "Little Red Corvette") -

Well I guess I should have known
By the way you looked me up and down
As your limo passed,
That you're the kind of man
Who's used to getting what he wants,
No need to ask.

Then your driver stopped,
Backed up to where I stood,
And you rolled your rear window down.
In the pale moonlight
You said "I'm alone tonight,
So c'mon, luv, let's take a spin around town."
And honey, I said...

Long Red Limousine
Just like you, so sleek and so fast.
Long Red Limousine.
I've got a feeling this just won't last.<> Well, I slid in beside you
On those plush leather seats,
You offered me a glass of champagne.
"I'm Damon," you said
With a twinkle in your eye.
I smiled, "Yes, I know your name."

Then you looked into my eyes,
And kissed me so deeply
The world started spinning so slow.
And as you held me tight
You whispered "Darlin', tonight
This ain't as far as I want to go..."

Long Red Limousine
Just like you, so sleek and so fast.
Long Red Limousine.
I've got a feeling this just won't last.

The way you came and stole my heart,
You ought to be in jail,
And the way you kiss should be a felony.
So I'll say goodnight,
Before it's too late,
But if you ever want to share more
Than just a good time with me..

In your Long Red Limousine
Just call, I'll be there so fast.
Long Red Limousine.
I pray someday that your love will last... Cheryl B.:

Kiss (to the tune of Prince's "Kiss") -

It ain't your wealth or fame
That turns me on,
Just let me see that watch chain swing
From dusk 'til dawn.
You don't have to wine and dine me
To make my night.
Just let me look into those gorgeous eyes -
It makes me feel alright...

You don't have to be rich
To be my guy,
It's what's inside your heart
That makes me fly.
No other host in the world can make me feel like this,
I just want to play the Feud
And your...kiss.

I don't need to pick a lollipop
To be in luck.
'Cause your kiss hello is worth to me
More than that hundred bucks.
So baby ask those questions if you will,
I'll try to do my best.
But win or lose, it's all the same -
'Cause you beat all the rest.

You don't have to be rich
To be my guy
It's what's inside your heart
That makes me fly.
No other host in the world can make me feel like this.
I just want to play the Feud
And your... kiss. Cheryl B.:

Dream Lover -

He comes to me
In dark sweet dreams
His voice so soft
And seductive
Heated whispers
Secret words
My soul aches to hear
Within his gaze
Lie fire and ice
His eyes a grey-green
Mystery
A puzzle
I long to solve
For he is
My only answer
He beckons me
And I come
What choice have I
But to obey
And as I approach
His waiting embrace
I awaken
To the cruel sun
And sigh
That it was
But a dream
As I pray for night
And blissful slumber
To bring him back
To me once more...

Racy Tracy -

Racy Tracy you're so fine
You've been flighty before
But I swear I'll make you mine

You're quite flirtacious
And some say you're a heel
But you're like a dream in that suit
And baby I know you're real

That British accent just drives me mad
And being with you makes me want to be bad
So go do your show
And after it's through
I'm sure I could think
Of some *things* for us to do

Never Say Goodbye -

He cracks safes by day
Deals poker at night
Many times I've dreamed
Of being in Newkirk's bunk at night!

Oh if I were that Hilda
Around the prisoners every day
Hogan would be my friend and all
But my taste would be British all the way!

And when the war is over
And he started to head back west
I think I'd sure as hell go with him
With those dimples I couldn't possibly resist
Then as we'd leave that German tundra
Heading for that London sky
I'd wrap my arms around him
And never say goodbye

You And Me And The Survey Makes 3 -

Watching Family Feud as always
Glued to my chair that night
As I stared at him I thought to myself
'Richard Dawson, was there ever a more beautiful sight?'
After it was over I crawled in bed
With the words 'Survey says!' still ringing in my head
That night I dreamed the dream of 'em all
No longer was he a fantasy in my head
To my shock and surprise there he was--in my bed!
He said "good morning darlin'"
As he smiled and got out of bed
And I felt my heart soar as I listened to what he said
After he stepped out of the shower,
Turned on the music and started to dance
I couldn't help but giggle
As he slipped on those white pants!

Hot Crossed English Muffins -

Richard Dawson is his the name
Kissin' the ladies is his game
I drool and stare like in a trance
Whenever he appears in those tight white pants!

The sexy Brit we all know and love
That Match Game stud we all dream of
His unmatchable wit as a game show man
Tell me, which one of us wouldn't mind
Being his tan???

Red Suit Song -

Richard do me favor
And put on that red suit
The producers don’t like it
But it SURE is cute!

Your name is on the back
But I must say
I wasn’t paying attention
To the lettering that day

Show that suit off baby
Don’t be afraid to strut
I don’t care about the feud
When I’m checkin out that butt

I thought it was for the Olympics
But now I know
You wore that suit for the ladies
And we enjoyed the show!

Richard Dawson -

Ravishing
Irristable
Cute, Caring, Cuddly
Hot
Attractive
Radiant
Dreamy

Damn fine
Awesome
Wonderful body
Sweet at heart
Open-minded
Nice butt

Yummy English Baritone -

Yummy English baritone.
Why are you here all alone?
Come on, lemme take you home
And keep you for my own.

Lonely was I on Saturday.
Needed someone to make my day.
Then you came walking by my way
And your lips had something to say. 'Are you lonely, too?' you asked.

In your beauty, I did bask.
Sorrow and darkness soon were dashed
As we walked along the tracks.

Finally, after all these tears,
I've found someone to hold me dear.
Never far, he's always near
To protect me from fear.

Damon's The Man -

Damon's the man
With the master plan
And he rules with an iron fist.
Someday soon,
If you meet your doom,
He'll be there. Get the jist?

He may look nice,
But his veins are full of ice
In this man who carries no grudge.
And with all his power,
He will soon devour.
His words are final 'cuz he's the judge.

From civilian to outlaw,
We all stand in awe
In the presence of this mortal man.
Handsome and fearless,
Alone and peerless.
What a man, Damon Killian.

Richard's Last Match Game -

You really are kidding, right?
Tell me it ain't so.
I can't believe you're leaving.
I don't wanna let you go.

You've had problems with the bosses,
The "Production Team Elite"
You held your ground and left the stage
And never kissed their feet.

I admire you for your courage,
I admire the way of your pride.
Don't be afraid to show 'em off.
We, your admirers, will smile wide!

Though you've gone and left us here
To struggle with the dudes.
Look what happened to the "cocky Brit"
He became the host of "Family Feud."

Who would have thought you'd make it big
When you struck out on your own?
Everyone in town thought they had you pegged
As a has-been, in the cold, all alone.

With "Family Feud", you gave us joy
And made us smile through the strife.
But the best thing about the "Feud"
Was that's where you met your wife.

So, thanks so much, MG men
Who thought they'd drag him down!
But look who's laughing louder than us:
Richard Dawson, the happiest man in town.

Richard The Punk -

Look at him sitting
On of his neighbor's fence.
Cutting class again,
This month's 10th offense.

Got his hair slicked back
And tryin' to look cool.
But there's something about that boy
That makes me wanna drool.

His eyes are cold like winter
But shine just like the summer sun.
His body drives me crazy
And it's got me on the run.

Strolling with his friends by day
Or running from the cops,
If you hear someone laughing loud,
You know he's busting someone's chops.

His parents tried to warn him
About those girls like me.
But when I looked into his eyes,
I knew it just had to be.

Wearing your leather jacket
And trying to act tough.
Oh, my God, there's something about you
That screams, "I can't get enough!!!"

Born Too Late -

Everyday, I open my eyes
And the sun comes up, no surprise.
But today, I learn my fate.
I've fallen for a man that I cannot date.

More handsome than a Roman god,
Could melt me with a smile or a nod.
My head spins when we're alone.
You're all I want for my very own.

Restlessly I toss and turn.
My heart aches, my heart yearns
For his strong arms to hold me close
And tell me who he loves the most.

My heart, how it aches for you
And all the sweet things that you do.
But you're my friend of the highest rate.
That's all you'll be cuz I was born too late.

Tongue Flick -

Tongue flick
so slick
lemme lick
that good stuff.

Sensual,
instinctual,
so sexual
you can be.

So sly,
how fly,
for you I'd die
just lemme lick your tongue.

Who? -

Funny? Certainly.
Adorable? No doubt.
Handsome? Definately.
Green eyes? I'm gonna shout!

Charming? Of course.
Dashing? Yes.
Romantic? I hope so.
Anxious? No stress.

Witty? Totally.
Kind? He's awesome.
Fiction? He's real.
Who? Richard Dawson.

Green-Eyed Boy -

The day God made you,
Was the day He made the sun.
He wanted something bright and cheerful
To bring joy to everyone.

So down to earth the angels brought
A beautiful, green-eyed boy.
One day soon, you'll be a man
And you will build, not destroy.

Little did he know he'd own the hearts
Of those whose lives he's graced.
There's never, ever been a kinder man
In all of time and space.

I often wonder why I was the one
With whom he spends all his time.
In his arms, he held me close
And said that "You're mine, all mine."

By the fire, we sit and cuddle and talk
Until we fall asleep.
And in his arms so strong I sink
into dreams, so pleasent and sweet.

I can't believe he's real,
I can't believe he's here with me.
Forever by my side he'll stay
And grow old and grey... you'll see...

Hogan's Heroes Theme
(To the tune of The Monkees Theme) -

Here we come, flyin' overhead.
Droppin' bombs over Berlin
And really knocking them dead...

Hey, hey! We're the Heroes!
And Jerry shot us all down.
But we're too busy workin',
Diggin' tunnels underground...

My Corner -

In the corner, all alone.
No one here to call my own.
This house is not a home
Without you.

Though you're not far away,
In my heart is where you'll stay.
Where nobody will make you sway
But me.

I was sent into the corner
Instead of your arms, where it's warmer.
I'm so lonely, I'm a mourner
For the silly words I used.

My insanity for you grew stronger
Until I couldn't hide it any longer.
I realize now that it was wronger
To say those things outloud.

I should have kept my mouth shut
And not said all that smut.
But you're white pants are just too much
To go unwhistled at.

Everyone sits around me
And pokes fun at my misery.
Why won't they let me be
And live out my punishment?

I have a picture of you,
Well I lied, I have two.
The one of me and you
Sitting on your boat.

It's decorated nice,
But without you, it has no spice.
You walk by and I look twice
To see what you're wearing.

My nose is pressed here firm.
I can't move, but I can squirm.
Oh, Richard, when will I learn
That you're too hot for me?

Words cannot express
The feelings in my chest.
Of all the men, you're the best
At lookin' mighty fine...

Dickie Dawson's Dive -

Welcome to the Dive,
The place that really thrives.
It's not that far a drive
From my place or yours.

He says "It's a hideout."
And when we're in doubt,
We all go there and shout
Until the sunlight comes.

The nice folks come here
From points far and near.
Sippin' tea or drinking beer
And we'll sit and watch the show.

The young guy's funny.
He makes lots of money
And shares it with his honey
But he lets us have the laughs.

We wanna take him home
And keep him for our own
To build a pleasure dome.
But he's gotta stay here.

I'll be back tomorrow
To chase away my sorrow
With the the laughs he lets me borrow.
Good night, my little Prince.

A Poem Called "Thud" -

Thud is the sound you hear
Whenever Richard's near.
He looks nice from the front
But there's a better view from the rear.

Wearing those pants so tight
He looks fabulous and out of sight.
I got the nerve to as you
Hey darlin', what are you doin' tonight?

There's only one word to use
For those who snooze and lose.
"Blind" is the term that comes to mind
For them, that's what I choose.

When he walks out onto stage,
He acts like he's the rage.
That's all fine, 'cause he's all mine
And I keep him locked in a cage.

I'm telling you, he's a stud.
Not a boring, dirty dud.
Like the lady carpenter once told me,
"I'm gonna nail that stud."

Fire and ice is fine.
And so is a glass of wine.
But Richard, baby, I'm not gonna rest
Until I make you mine.

Please tell me you'll stay
And chase my blues away.
Days are long, but nights are longer
So by your side, I will lay.

These feelings I have are new,
So tell me you'll be true.
I promise on my honor
I'll never be bad to you.

I just want to know
That everywhere you go, I go.
Mother Nature will never seperate us
Not wind, or sleet or snow.

I won't let you be
Until you're here with me.
I won't share with anyone else
I'll make you happy, you'll see.

I can dream of a rose's bud,
Or my heart that goes "lub dub."
Aw, but baby, when you walk by
My head just drops and THUD!

King Killian -

I'm bolded by your presence,
The danger in your eyes.
They don't understand.
You're in command.
And you're makin' my fever rise.

The runner's feet start jumping
As soon as they hit the street.
And on his tail
A Stalker will wail
And meet his own defeat.

You can sit back and watch the fun,
But I got my eyes on you.
Hungry and alive,
Lemme take you for a ride,
And let you do what the Stalkers do.

I'll run all over Heaven and Hell,
Watch me and I'll make you smile.
Don't make me wait.
And tell 'em you'll be late
And won't be back for quite a while.

You seem so mean and you seem so cold
For such a handsome guy.
Those grey-green stones,
Beckon me to come home
With you. Let me satisfy....

You, you evil bastard.
The man I can't live without.
You invaded my head,
I'm better off dead,
All night long you made me shout....

Your name, not once, not twice.
But over and over, all night long.
A hot situation,
Not infatuation,
Kept you lovin' me right and strong.

A man in control intrigues me.
Makes me ponder and makes me think.
I can't believe I found him.
Caught him and I loved him.
Damon, my missing link.

In the control room, on the floor,
Or even on the makeup table.
Any time of day,
You can hear me say,
"If you're willin', then I am able."

Ode To Damon Killian -

Some say you're evil.
Others say you're mean.
But that's what I like about you.
It's what makes you keen.

You're tough against the world,
And to your crew, you have no class.
But high in the rafters my eyes looked down
And I was attracted to your ass.

I really wonder why I find
A man like you so hot.
I've been with other guys before,
And Damon Killian they're not.

They never made me angry
And they were never, ever cruel.
So why do I go for a bad man who's got
All the goods to make me drool?

I told you that you're handsome
And you only laughed at me.
Your rejection only spilled the fuel
On the fire of my need.

Our lives are really different
So I guess I better learn
That to run in your tight circle
I'm gonna have to squirm.

I'll make you notice me
One day, to that there is no doubt.
I'll take you on the set so fast
And give ya something to yell about.

Then maybe in your office where you
Decide who lives and dies.
I'll go down on you, or if you want
I'll just stare into your eyes.

Until the day comes when you find
That you're without someone,
Look me up, and we'll run it around
And really have some fun.

No matter where you go
And no matter what you do,
I'm only gonna be a few steps behind
And be ready to make love to you.

Ode To The Watch Chain -

Gimmie the watch chain,
And give it to me fast!
Better hurry up
Cuz I may not last!

Swingin' back and forth,
And maybe to and fro.
Not brass or cheap silver.
Gold's the way to go.

Hold on to me, baby,
And hold on tight.
One tug is all you need
To set your mind right!

Been good all my life
But I tossed it down the drain
All because I pulled
On that little gold chain.

Random Candy -

Racy Tracy Ratigan
Makin' hubby mad again.
We need a kilted hero
To show us where it's at again.

Devil's Brigade, with bagpipes in hand,
Hogan's Heroes and King Rat, too.
Go ahead and tell us now
Which Dawson's does it for you.

Was it the dark, wavy hair or the gentle smile
That caught your undivided attention?
Perhaps it was the greying hair
And the sideburns I dare not mention?

Match Game, The Running Man, Family Feud,
And even You Bet Your Life.
It's hard to see him play someone mean
But, hey. You know, that's life!

From the time he first set his feet
On the USA's good soil,
He held the world in the palm of his hand
And the ladies hearts did boil.

Weaver the chuteman, makin' the jumps
And McDonald will walk you through.
Sticky-fingers Newkirk will steal your heart
And make sure you're never blue.

Killian's the man who'll take your life,
And send you to your doom.
But watch your back with Oliver Fair
When you're both trapped a room.

All in all, he's not so bad
For a boy from across the sea.
I think I'll lay down and close my eyes
And dream of him and me....

A Word About Tuxedos -

Mother said men are flashy
In their nicely tailored suits.
It shows that he has money
And other assorted loot.

But I think men are finer
And really kinda neat-o
In a bow tie, vest and studs
That go with a tuxedo.

Shiney black shoes and a cumberbund
Add a real nice touch.
Turn around, baby, one more time
And show me what I love so much.

Ditch that boring wrist watch
For a gold watch with a chain.
Let it swing around all night long
And watch me go insane!

Take me someplace quiet,
Where we can be alone.
Lemme swing that watch chain
And it's your name that I will moan.

Is it possible to love a man
Just by virtue of what he wears?
Or is it maybe the way he runs
His hands through his hair...

In the sun or in the dark
Or even incognito.
You'll never get my hands off
Richard Dawson in his tuxedo!

Beachcomber -

Strolling along the sand today,
I saw before my eyes
A man too fine to be all mine
A god among mortal guys.

As I walked on passed, I heard him say,
"Hey, girl, come sit by me."
I ground to a halt, gonna be my fault
I won't wanna let him be.

He was sweet, he was gentle and really very kind
To me, someone new.
He looked in my eyes, didn't tell no lies
And said, "I wanna make love to you."

Like a shot from a gun, I stood straight up
And reached down for his hand.
"Come on, pretty baby. Lemme drive you crazy."
And we headed out down the strand.

All night long, under the stars
He wouldn't let me rest.
I got mine, time and time
Again. God, he is the best.

If ever you're lonely, head on down
To a stretch of open beach.
Take it from me, then you'll see
That Love's never out of reach.

Left With Only You -

Candy and flowers may be nice
For a girl who thinks you're sweet.
But flash those eyes right at me,
And I'll make you feel the heat.

Sometimes it's just not proper
For a girl to mess around.
But for you, I'll make an exception
And just let those old thoughts drown.

I'll take you up high, I'll take you down low.
There ain't no place I fear.
As long as you're beside me, boy,
Close and very near.

Some people say that love ain't real
but that's 'cuz they don't see it.
You are the expression, loud and clear,
"Don't dream it, baby. Be it!"

So, come with me. Take my hand.
I promise I won't bite.
But if your lips just touch mine once
I'll surrender without a fight.

Don't promise me the moon,
'Cuz I can't reach that far.
But your eyes shine just like the sun
And show how lovely you are.

Don't love me once, don't love me twice,
For love has no cash amount.
Your kiss is just like a knock-out punch
And have you got me down for the count.

You send me to another world
Like Jupiter or Mars.
The time we spend together
Is yours, mine and ours.

Yeah, I know that you did "Laugh-In,"
And I know you did "The Feud."
But we got a little show of our own
That we like to do in the nude.

There's no one in my life
That I can compare you to.
'Cuz if I subtract the pain from my life
I'd be left with only you.

The Pants That Dance -

The Pants that dance all over the world,
From London to L.A.,
They got us droolin'
And I ain't foolin'
When he gets up and walks our way!

I took one glance
At his tight white pants
to make my heart start yearnin'.
I hopped on a plane for Germany
And I found him in Berlin.

They love 'em in Russia
In the cold white snow
And they love them in Bombay.
Ev'ry time I see them pants so tight
The sun shines on a cloudy day.

Paris, Milan, and Dublin, too
Kiev and down to Rome.
All this globehoppin' is wipin' me out
Baby, I just wan-na take you home.

Say you'll stay home with me tonight
I'll give you a reason to stay.
He looked at me
With love in his eyes and said
Baby, you got me! I'll stay!

~*~

I woke up this mornin'
in my baby's arms.
I don't wear no saints medallion
'Cuz he's my lucky charm
My paycheck was callin' me at work
I really had to go.
But he jumped up and blocked my way
And said, "Girl, I need you so."

How could I say no to him
After all he's done for me?
He gave me his love and tenderness
And he did it voluntarily.

He looked at me with eyes so green,
So gentle and so kind.
I said, "I really, really hate my dead-end job
He can kiss my behind.

So there we stayed, in bed all day.
Just holdin' one another.
He's the best thing that ever happened to me
And won't trade him for an other!

'Burns On The Water -

I got a potion from the ocean
To set us in motion.
I've got to have you near.
If you can do me, baby, all night long,
I might just let you steer.

I need you close and I need you now.
So come over here and please me!
You know yourself that you want me too.
So don't you try to tease me.

Oh, yeah....
Oh, yeah...
Right here...
Right now....
Hold on!!!

'Burns, Baby, 'Burns -

I woke up this mornin'
In a state of shock.
I got up and I went outside
On the deck of someone's yacht!

"How'd I end up here?" I wondered
As I looked around.
"Good Mornin'" said a voice so sweet
In a deep and sexy sound.

"Remember where you are, my love?"
He asked, no harm attached.
"We came back here, and I sipped your love.
And in an instant I was trashed."

"How long we been driftin'?" I asked
He said "A day, maybe two.
I couldn't help it, need you all to myself
To make sweet love to you."

So there I was, set adrift
With a man who needed to learn
That mixin' tight white pants with grey green eyes
Is just as lethal as greying sideburns!

Boss Burns -

Why was I alone
On such a hot, hot night?
I had no one to be with.
No one to hold tight.

I was standin' at the bar
Just sippin' my drink,
When down sat a man
Who gave me a wink.

His eyes were grey-green
And they called me over.
I said, "Hey there, baby.
Need a four leaf clover?"

He smiled and looked away,
Kinda bashful I guess.
Then I saw his sign
Of utter sexiness.

This man had sideburns,
Untamed and wild.
Then I went "ga-ga"
Just like a lil' child.

"Would you mind too much
If I stroked your face?"
He smiled and answered back,
"Let's go to my place."

I touched much more
Than his sideburns that night.
All night long
He didn't put up a fight.

Oh, my God!
Baby how I yearn
For one more touch
Of your Killer Sideburns!

A little ditty about the "Pants" -

Come here, boy
I know ya wanna dance
Turn around now
And lemme see those pants!!!

Oh, my God!
Baby, you look fine
Come a little closer
I'm gonna make them mine!

You got style,
You got class,
Lemme put my hands
All over your a$$!

I want you now,
I'll leave nothin' to chance
I can't get enough
of those Tight White Pants!!

~*~

The moon was low
And the time was right
To see my baby's back
In something nice and tight.

He said, "Come on let's cruise
All over town."
But I could't stop myself
From looking down.

I couldn't stand any more
I wanted him near
Feel his hands around me tight
Feel his breath in my ear.

Damn, he looked hot
And I started to melt.
I needed his body
And tell him what I felt.

We both said "I love you"
What a fine romance
Just me and my baby
and those Tight, White Pants!!!

~*~

Strollin' by the beach
I was lookin' for action.
Then before my eyes
appears a pleasant destraction.

He was lookin' real fine,
Sittin' in the sand.
I had to find out
What was with this man!

I said "Hello, sexy boy
I saw you from afar,
Could you be the one
That's ment to melt my heart?"

He said he wasn't sure,
but he'd like to find out.
And would I care to follow him
Back up to his house.

We stepped in through the door
And we both started kissin'.
I said, "Now that's the kind of stuff
that, baby, I've been missin'."

He loved me strong,
And he loved me right.
We had each other rockin'
All through the night!

A pillar of perfection
Looked in my direction.
I think I'm gonna scream
'Cuz I made a connection.

And for the rest of my life
I'll be in a trance,
All because I looked
At some Tight, White Pants!

Note: Keep in mind that opinions vary, and everyone's
comments and opinions may be different from yours.

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Last Updated: 26 November 2001.

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Go to: The Richard Dawson Experience.

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Email: philhartman49@aol.com