Help The Coming Of JesusTron

As it is written in the NEW Bible, in the year 2047 when the great, magnificent, glorious, unstoppable JesusTron Mech will wreak havoc upon all that exists on Earth, but to fulfill this prophecy we need all the Jesusites such as yourself to donate all your hard earned money to the reigion of Jesusism. As it is written in the NEW Bible, JesusTron will somewhat resemble a giant Power Ranger Zord, but unfortunately for now we do not have the funding to bring this prophecy to life as you can tel by the pictures indicated below :( The final JesusTron will be manned by Jesus and Ex-Disciple E Of The Apocalypse. Due to the high levels of radiation that JesusTron will emit, Jesus and Ex-Disciple E Of The Apocalypse will be required to wear special protective suits. With all the money that our Jesusites have sent in we have managed to build 2 prototype suits, but unfortunately Ex-Disciple E Of The Apocalypse does not approve of his suit, so therefore we need more funding for the suits as well as the JesusTron Mech.

Here is the first prototype of JesusTron Version 1.0 built entirely by Ex-Disciple E Of The Apocalypse out of toys from Radio Shack while he was drunk. Unfortunately Ex-Disciple E Of The Apocalypse was so drunk that he could not read the blueprints correctly so therefore this prototype is only 2 feet tall and only has enough room for Jesus. This prototype also has no weapons and needs AA batteries to work.

Here are the animated blueprints for JesusTron Version 2.0 ???

Since all of our funding was spent on the prototype of JesusTron Version 1.0, Jesus has constructed JesusTron Version 2.0 entirely out of Jesus Magic and a garbage can. As you can tell by the picture, JesusTron Version 2.0 is using its Jesus Magic Flame Thrower of Doom, unfortunately a malfunction occurs when the Jesus Magic Flame Thrower Of Doom is fired and causes a giant explosion inside of JesusTron Version 2.0. Both Jesus and Ex-Disciple E Of The Apocalypse were injured in the giant explosion but luckily Jesus healed them with his Jesus Magic, once again showing that he is the real son of god.

This is the Jesus Suit Version 2.0 (the original version 1.0 was sold to George Lucas which was later named C3P0) It is unknown how Jesus is able to fit in this suit which is more than 10 times his size, and it is also unknown what magical powers the guitar has, but you should not question your Personal Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.

This is the Ex-Disciple E of The Apocalypse Suit Version -8.4. It is unknown if this suit will be completed by the year 2047 or how it will protect Ex-Disciple E Of The Apocalypse from radiation since it is made primarily of bodily waste.