Téa: (to Antonio) Quite a political system you've got here. That woman (referring to Alex) makes Evita Peron look sane.
Téa: (To Kevin) I like sex... and I like you.
Todd: You mean somebody actually pays you besides me?
Téa: No one else has to.
Kevin: Let me bring you up to speed. Todd Manning allowed me to be accused of raping Marty Saybrooke, which he did by the way, and Alex, she hired a costumed gunman to blow Cassie and my brains out down in Rio.
Téa: But, aside from that, is there a problem?
Téa: (to Rachel) Ahhhh, arroz con pollo, Puerto Rico's answer to the Happy Meal.
Téa: (to Andrew) We could pull a Mel Hayes, go on top of the Palace Hotel roof and thumb our noses at god. I'm sure that Todd Manning would put us on the front page of the paper - you and me screaming, "down with Banner reporters - they cheat on their husbands and girlfriends".
Rachel: Mom has sworn off caffeine
Téa: (to Nora) How did you survive the withdrawal?
Nora: (proudly) I didn't - until I found this fabulous natural substitute call garana.
Téa: (smug) Chica, didn't you pay attention in product liability - natural on the label doesn't always mean healthy. I mean caffeine occurs in nature - in coffee, tea, cola nuts, and garana - no wonder you survived withdrawal.
Rachel: You were the one who said Track was too good to be true. His fiance‚ showed up at Club Indigo tonight.
Téa: Did you kill him or did she?
Rachel: (talking about getting over the blues) Nothing that a summer sale and a credit card can't solve.
Téa: Hey, that's my line!
Rachel: Well you were right. Shopping is the ultimate anti-creep remedy.
Téa: I can use a good dose myself after being exposed to Kevin. Hey, but let Cassie have Kevin, I will take "Calvin".
Todd: (regarding Bo's defense) Nobody's that good.
Téa: I am!
Rachel: Bottom line is we need some new men in our lives.
Téa: How about these two? (their masseurs). They're strong and handsome Masseurs in Russian with Subtitles: Intelligent. Bilingual.
Téa: (to Todd, on the docks) So this is the scenic tour huh? First stop - site of the Armitage bombing. What's next? County Morgue?
Téa: (to Todd, looking under the sofa cushions) This is where you keep the cheese crackers, right?
Téa: (her reaction to seeing her wedding ring from Todd) Does this come out of my five million?
Todd: (about their 1st wedding ceremony) Anybody you want to invite?
Téa: Uh, no. No one I know would understand. You?
Todd: I don't know anybody. Except maybe Viki. But she's away. She's in Washington at a conference for the National Association of Boring Publishers or something.
Téa: Shouldn't you be there?
Todd: I'm not boring.
Téa: You're telling me!
Todd: This is America. Even the janitor's daughter can grow up to be the First Lady.
Téa: Or President!
Téa: (Todd appears anxious about the custody hearing) We must have really bonded. I'm drinking coffee and you're the one who's wired.
Téa: (to Moose regarding the Hitchcock movie) The birds die at the end.
Téa: (to Todd) I happen to like you, you jerk!
Téa: (to Todd) Remember I am the best friend that you have got!
Todd: I don't know what Viki was thinking - you know, acting like that in front of a bunch of people - it was like she didn't care what she looked like.
Téa: (under her breath as she watches him stuff food down his throat) Runs in the family.
Téa: (to Todd) May I simply say - you have the worst table manners that I have ever seen and I've eaten in some pretty funky company.
Téa: (to Rachel) I think I've been at pretty close range to Todd lately and, from what I've seen of him, he does have a problem with one race--the human race. He's an equal opportunity irritant.
Téa: (to Todd) Rape isn't about sexual attraction, it's about violence. And if you can't understand that, then we have NOTHING more to discuss!
Tea: (to Andrew) I never knew you played the saxophone - in fact, I'm still not so sure that you do.
Téa: (to Todd) Relax, I don't like you that much!
Tea: (to Eli) Okay, there's a deal on the table. Do you want to take it or do you just want to keep on acting stupid?
Téa: (to Andrew) I married Todd Manning for five million dollars. What could you possibly do that's worse than that?
Téa: (thinking Todd is drowning in the river) Todd? Todd? Todd.... how stupid!
Téa: (wondering why Todd hasn't been home since Georgie's murder, Todd explains he's the only one who can bring the Buchanans down) How noble of you, Todd. Like a small town marshall going up against the big bad ranchers.
Téa: (to Rachel, who accuses Téa of 'selling' her soul by taking Todd up on his business contract marriage proposal) What's left of my soul wouldn't fetch five dollars in funny money. Anyway, the point is I'm not selling my soul, but I'm perfectly willing to lease it on a temporary basis.
Téa: (during bedside chat) We're on the same path together, Todd.
Téa: (laughing, to Todd, at Bayberry Inn) We better hurry right down before all the glugg's glugged!
Todd: Anything else I need to do before I get married again?
Téa: Yes. You need to find a wife.
Téa: (to Todd) This has all the romance of a stock merger.
Téa: (after she and Todd save The Sun, Todd tells her she's being a 'nudgie nudge' and should mind her own business) Oh, I get it. Why can't a 'Téa' be more like a 'Todd'. What? Todd is SO honest and never a clod!
Téa: (after Todd attacks Del in jail and is placed back in a cell) You nitwit!
Téa: (to Todd during jail scenes) I'm not anyone. I'm the woman you say you LOVE.
Téa: (at Bayberry Inn) Uh.... I'm starting to feel something.
Téa: (to Todd, about Moose, on Halloween) Maybe you ruffled his feathers because you didn't get him a costume.
Téa: (to Todd) Grunt once for "yes", twice for "no".
Téa: (to Todd, on New Year's Eve) Listen, come on, what’s the big deal? So we go out and we get something to eat. You don’t have to dance. Come on, what else do you have to do? Watch the Jerry Lewis Festival with Moose? Oh you wouldn’t! That is pathethic, Todd!
Todd: It's gotta be his name.
Téa: A bird named 'Moose'?
Todd: I got a kid named Starr. No, it's gotta be his name. Or maybe he really is a moose and this is just a really good disguise.
Téa: (laughing) Oww, my ribs!
Todd: This is going to remain one of life's great "moosteries". That's gotta be his name, go ahead, try it.
Téa: Uh, here Moose. (bird squawks) I don't believe it!
Todd: There ya go, there's hope for you two yet.
Téa: Unless he's just playing 'fast and moose' with me.
Téa: (to Todd, at Jessica's graduation party) Take me with you.
Roseanne: .... even when he's being a stubborn jerk. I can't help myself. It's just that... there's nothing Christian could do that would ever make me stop loving him.
Téa: Sigh... I know the feeling.
Roseanne: Are you talking about Rj?
Téa: Actually, I was thinking of Todd.
Téa: (to Starr, on the way to Niagara Falls) Wherever your Daddy takes us is fine with me. Just as long as we're together.
Téa: (in a "dear john" letter to Rj, about Todd) The HEART knows its own truth!
Téa: (to Todd, second wedding ceremony) And pledge to you my laughter, my understanding, and my love... for now... and forevermore!
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