Culture Clash
Tap splits
double-header
Dictated by Local Inebriated
Funnyman (June 4th, 2006, 4:44 AM)
GAME 1:
After being spotted to a 3-0 lead. Leadoff single by Erik Kent. He scored later on a single by Jeremy. Schmidt, basically Wadewitz singled and alright that’s the second run of the inning. And then that guy over [The Bub, who is passed out on the couch 1 foot away. His mouth is still open!! And he’s still snoring!!! “I want to drop kick him,” said Carlson, “in the face.”] there flew out to zero.
He’s still fucking snoring…with his mouth open. And then, with drool. On your couch.
That means he
struck out. Second inning, we held them
scoreless. Ah, bottom of the inning was
started by
Alright
so we’re in the third inning. Ahhh, let’s see.
After shutting them down again, they got zero runs.
So after no runs by them, it was our turn. Two outs. Local Inebriated Funnyman lined one to center. Singled to center. In front of the guy that was driving them in all night. Erik Kent was the man. Put in something about the two out rally. At 14-11 Carlson would not let this lead decrease any further. You’ve already added in the piss-rod. You might as well add it lower the hands. Lowering the hands was an absolute battle decision. [break for urinating]. Where’d you end up? So anyway, single to lead off next inning. (You have to add to something in about how you thought the game was out of reach. So you made a bunch of defensive replacements. But it wasn’t. It wasn’t out of reach.) After they didn’t get anything. You get that in there? Cuz my single was to lead off the inning. Then this is where it got really tricky. Erik Kent had a home run, where we I scored and so did he for two RBI. Then a base hit by you and a fielder’s choice. Then it skips all the way down. I think it just stops scoring so you can just cut it off after that. We got 4 runs that inning. You got that in the game review? Final score was 8-3...10-3…14-7…14-11… So, 17-11.
We
have to edit this. I’m going to tear it
apart of verbage alone. You’re adding? I can’t read that cuz
my eyes won’t focus. What is this? What does it say? His mouth is open and he is a nuisance. I can’t think straight with his mouth open.
Ah, I’m typing in the words we’re both thinking (slash, his mouth is fucking
open and he’s snoring and I can’t believe it period I want to stab him in the
face with a boot. It’s a good thing we
just ignored him when he was at the stadium.
And that big boobs magee
over at the Why Not II decided he was not worth his time to acknowledge. Bub, make me a
sandwich before I wake up. Oh, he’s
not. God, he is still sucking in wind
immensely. Hurricane
Katrina anyone? I’m not lying to
you, it sounds like wind tunnels blowing through the downtown sector of
Game ended. We got three outs pretty easily. Though I’m not representing my third run, which is pretty important. God, would you shut up? I’m gonna put a sock in my mouth. My balls are out! They got the rest of the outs, the game ended. And everyone celebrated.
Game 2:
And with so, everyone else sat out. Steve tried to decrease his infinite
ERA. While lasting 6 innings and shaking
off numerous, numerous calls by the Funnyman, he managed to get outs. This overlooks the fact that
Anywho with a new sense of ignorance between my ears and a natural sense of deafness outside them, I am now ignoring the fat man with the blue shirt and the blue jeans and bringing you the rest of the game review. For the most part, there isn’t much to brag about. We scored some runs. We got some outs. The most important thing is that he’s not waking up right now while I’m looking at him with distain in my face. I hate him. It’s so loud! Unbelievable!!
In short, we wrapped it up. The fights didn’t outweigh the runs we scored nor the experience we gained. We are that much better of a team for having struggled through a strife caused by the people we know and the people we meet on the other side of the diamond – he’s still fucking snoring. I wish I could stab a dagger through his woman’s of an adam’s apple.
Tune
in next week for a new installment of Club Tap softball weekly. Keep those hits roarin’
and those Bubs a snorin’.