I hope everyone had as much fun with softball this year as I did despite the often poor outcomes of game. I am looking forward to hopefully playing again this fall, next spring, and next summer
As anticipated, Davis fielded a team spliced with ringers but still short of the desired ten players. For the umpteenth week in a row, random Davis players unexpectedly did not show up, leaving the squad with only nine guys. The team could have used the extra player against a star-studded ACM lineup, which would stop at nothing to embarrass its unworthy Real Chili opponent.
To its credit, the overmatched Davis lineup kept the game interesting for a while. Per usual, things did not start off well, though. ACM capitalized on Davis pitcher Ryan Miller’s early wildness trying to find a diminutive and unpredictable strike zone and struck for an eight-run first inning. Miller and a much-improved Davis defense were able to hold down the mighty ACM offense for the next two innings, and an offensive outburst by Real Chili had the underdogs down only 10-6 in the middle of the fourth inning. But, it was all downhill from there.
Miller continued to struggle with the strike zone, and the ACM bats woke up in a large way for the last two innings. Home runs started leaving the field right and left, including a behemoth blast towards the tree in left-center, catalyzing the walks into multiple runs. Not even the incredible defense of Eric Kent, who covered the entire left side of the infield with ease and turned two beautiful double plays on the night, could prevent the nauseating eruption from ACM. As ACM piled on, the Davis offense went back into its typical hibernation mode, scoring only one run in the last two innings. Pianolegs Hanley fittingly ended the game by taking a called second strike to close out the top of the sixth.
Manager Hanley had mixed emotions about the game saying, “There really isn’t much we could have done about that. We played by far our best defensive game of the year and didn’t really shoot ourselves in the foot. That’s something we can be proud of. We just don’t have the ability to destroy a softball like our opponents do.”
If anything were lacking in the game, it would have to be the Real Chili offensive production. “Even though it doesn’t have the power to hit homers, the lineup could have produced more than seven runs,” said Hanley. Davis really missed a golden opportunity by failing to get the ball out of the infield. ACM had only three outfielders including an obvious last-minute replacement that could not play softball well. There were huge gaps in left and right-center, as well as a gaping hole in right field. However, in addition to four strikeouts, Real Chili hit 11 groundball outs to infielders and one line drive to the shortstop. In total, only two of the team’s 18 outs were recorded by outfielders. To its credit, the ACM infield played a fantastic defensive game. However, with a few more line drives and fly balls, Davis could have done some serious damage.
Real Chili once again will try to rebound and record its second win of the season next week at 7:00 at Wick against another powerhouse, 41 Express. The team will be extremely shorthanded and will for a second time be without a manager. Ryan Miller, $lash McLeod, and Matt Christel will be in charge of running the team and filling out the roster. Everyone should let Pianolegs or one of the three aforementioned players know if they will make it on Friday before this coming Wednesday. If anyone can find more guys to come, feel free. Also, for all those roster players that decide to randomly not show up, this will not be a good week to do that.
Things got out of hand after the first frame. Once again, Ryan Miller struggled to get strikes into a rather small strike zone in both the second and third innings. When Cy Miller did throw strikes, his defense let him down momentously. “Almost every ball hit into the outfield found the wall, throws took forever to get into the infield, and the infield was an absolute circus,” said a disgruntled Davis manager. “This was perhaps our worst defensive game all year, and that is saying a lot. It is a real disappointment considering this team’s steady improvement throughout the year.” Perhaps the most puzzling aspect of the performance was the fact that for the first time in weeks the Davis defense had roster players playing positions with which they were mostly comfortable. Despite the familiarity with their positions, the Davis fielders failed to make the call and dropped the ball.
As O.B.’s continued to rack up runs without hitting the ball well, the Davis offense put up a decent performance. Several players had good games at the plate including Ryan Miller’s 2-2 with a double performance, and Jon “Tanaka” Strelecki’s amazing 1-1 with 2 walk performance. The two walks pushed Tanaka’s OBP over .100 points higher than his slugging percentage; a feat well worth mentioning. Without a doubt, though, the most impressive plate display came from Old Hoss Brubaker. Old Hoss hit the world’s highest fly ball almost to the fence in his first at-bat for a long out. In his next AB to lead off the third inning, Brubaker hit another towering fly ball that landed at the base of the fence for his team-leading fourth triple of the year. In the fourth inning, Old Hoss managed to one-up himself with another towering drive to left field that humiliated the opposing left fielder and resulted in a three-run home run. The home run was only the second by a Real Chili roster player this year, and it moved Brubaker’s slugging percentage to an eye-popping 1.111.
Thanks to the slugging of Old Hoss, Real Chili put up 7 runs in 5 innings of play. The damage could have been much more had Davis not left 7 runners on base through the first three innings. The offense still was slowed down by a lack of extra-base hits. There are still a number of players on the team who have yet to collect an extra-base hit, including $lash McLeod, Jon Tanaka, The Bub, Triebs, and Johnny Marek. In response to his failure to hit a double, The Bub said, “Fuck, shit, damnit, fuck, fuck.” All of the aforementioned players failed to notch their firsts of the year of Friday, however, there were some noteworthy first-time accomplishments in the game. Matt Christel collected his first walk of the year despite taking a good amount of pitches throughout the season. Also, Triebs collected his first RBI despite having 12 hits and a .480 batting average on the year. As a whole, the team did not strike out in the game, certainly a feat worth noting.
Thanks to some rainout scheduling, Real Chili has three more weeks to put everything together and earn a second win on the season. Davis manager Pianolegs Hanley has targeted the rematch with O.B.’s on August 20th as the game that Real Chili can take. Davis will try its luck next week at 9:00 against the powerhouse ACM team.
Yet again, Real Chili found itself in an insurmountable deficit early in a game. Side Trackers put up a nine-spot in the first inning, and the Davis lineup stalled in the early going. Down 11-0, Davis started collecting some singles and scored a few runs. Unfortunately, any attempt at a comeback was silenced by a 10-run fourth inning by Side Trackers. Much to the chagrin of Davis pitcher Don Wadewitz, almost everything the human mallets connected with found its way over the fence. Tracker DuPree Griffey Jr. hit a ball an estimated 315 feet over the right-field fence and onto highway-41. Davis, a previous 300-foot homerun virgin, felt a little roughed up following Griffey’s blast. The team had never bled there before, and it was yucky.
When the dust had settled, Davis had lost once more by a large margin. Giving up 29 runs wasn’t too bad for Davis, but the Davis manager Pianolegs Hanley would have liked to see more than six runs scored. “Our team is improving every week,” said Hanley. “We are doing much better on defense, though there are still some rough edges that need to be smoothed. On offense, we are getting a good deal of hits and there has been across-the-board improvement of plate discipline. However, much like the Brewers of this year, we aren’t getting enough extra-base hits to bring runners home.” Paul Rauch was the only Davis player to collect an extra-base hit on the night.
Real Chili did manage a few laughs when Wadewitz intentionally walked two Trackers hitters that were going for the cycle in the fifth inning. The Trackers returned the favor by intentionally walking Wadewitz in the next inning. Wadewitz became the first player in franchise history to be intentionally passed.
Real Chili had some help from a couple replacement players in the game and will again be looking for help next week at 6:00 against the suddenly resurgent Prostar team. With manager Hanley suspended for next game, managerial duties will be on a triumvirate, Cerberus-like creature known as Old Hoss Brubaker, Matt Christel, and Chris Banach. Davis will need someone to keep score and will need the three-headed manager to arrange a roster and lineup. Also, the team would love someone to write up a game review. For anyone with questions, contact Pianolegs sometime before Wednesday.
Game two was likely the best game Real Chili has played all year. Unfortunately for the Davis squad, the win did not count in the official standings. The game did, nevertheless, give a feather to Davis to put into its hat. Davis played a man short after DuPree had to leave for Miller Park for some reason, but his loss didn’t affect the team at all. The highlight of game two would have been Davis’ 12-run fourth inning, where the team batted around twice, had it not been for the mind-blowing umpiring of veteran ump Funniest Person Ever. It was Ever’s first time managing a Real Chili game, and he did not disappoint. His calls were crisp and seamless. He had the opponent’s fans at the edge of their seats the entire game waiting for his patented strike call. Due to Funniest’s work and the fact that the game was an exhibition, no one seemed to notice the blowout going Davis’ way for once.
When asked his opinion on the game, infielder Erik Voight replied, “OOOOOOOOO, strike.” The Bub shared a dissimilar opinion weighing in with, “OOOOOOOO, just missed.” Old Hoss Brubaker had the most pessimistic attitude on the team mentioning, “OOOOOOOO, ouch.” Davis outfielder $lash McLeod could not be reached for comment due to a case of hysterical laughter. He will likely be available to play next week despite the symptoms.
“Ooooooooo, we played pretty well out there today,” said manager Pianolegs Hanley. “Oooooooo, our defense in both games was solid, and our hitting really came alive in game two. Oooooooo, of course, Donnie Wadewitz gave us a bunch of good innings on the mound. Oooooooo, I was disappointed at the beginning of the game when we had to obtain two players to fill out our roster. Ooooooooo, everything changed, though, when Funniest Person Ever got out there. Ooooooo, he really eased my tension when he pretended not to know how to spell ‘Real,’ ‘Chili,’ nor ‘Davis’ before the game. Oooooooo, from that all the way to his pseudo Rick Flair strike calls, he made the game a blast.”
Real Chili’s postgame celebration likely won’t last long as it will gear up for a rematch against Side Trackers next week at 9:00. Davis, who lost the two free agent acquisitions after the game, will again likely be short the ten needed players and will scramble to find able replacements. All the foundation is set for a huge upset next week.
When Davis, bloody leg and all, took the field, it again found itself down early and had no clear answer. Nick Meyers took the mound again for the Real Chili boys and pitched well. However, a few defensive gaffes put his team in an early 16-1 hole. The Davis lineup produced a respectable number of good at-bats, but some terrible baserunning flattened potential rallies that would have gotten the team back in the game. In the first inning, Meyers was sent home and thrown out as the second out in the inning. In the third inning, recurrence showed its ugly face, as Slash McLeod was gunned down at the plate for the second out. In each inning, Davis scored only one run. Had the outs not been made, several more runs likely would have scored. What’s more, the Davis squad almost had a third runner thrown out at home in the seventh inning, but some graceful dancing by Erik Voight down the third base line wooed the ACM catcher and caused him to drop the ball. Voight then pirouetted around the sprawled out catcher gently tapping the corner of the plate with his toe.
After the fourth inning, Davis found itself down 20-2 but refused to give in. Meyers and the defense behind him settled down nicely giving up only three runs for the rest of the game. Meyers even went so far as to throw a 1-2-3 fifth inning and strike out the side in the sixth. As ACM’s offensive fire was put out, Davis ignited one of its own. Real Chili scored seven runs in the last two innings highlighted by an RBI triple by Dearfoot Wadewitz in the seventh. As Wadewitz ran the bases with the blunt force of a Panzer Tank, Voight showed the aforementioned elegance and grace of a ballet dancer. Through a tear in her eye, one Davis fan declared, “That is the most amazing display of collective power and beauty I’ve seen since I last saw Back in Business starring Brian Bosworth!”
The late inning play dulled an otherwise sharp and painful loss. Manager Pianolegs Hanley stated, “At least that gave us something off of which we can build. Though this will sound simple and understated, as well as sounding like shrewdly appointed disparagement, [Davis] really needs to work on catching and throwing a softball. The pitching has really come around, but silly defensive faux pas continue to cost us runs.” The inexperienced Davis team has allowed countless baserunners to advance bases all year, but has itself failed to do so against the other teams. “That’s just something we need to work on,” said Hanley. “A little bit of practice will get us to be better at throwing to bases, receiving throws, and applying tags. Meanwhile, we have to know when the right time to try to take an extra base is and capitalize then.”
Davis had a few batters that struggled quite a bit at the plate. The team hopes that those guys can rebound and that the rest of the team can continue its hitting improvement. Many runs will be needed next week when Davis takes on 41 Express, a team that was scouted after the game, at 8:00 on Friday.
One explanation for passed balls and generally poor play was the presence of twenty 14-year-old girls playing on an adjacent field. "It just seemed like our heads weren’t in the game. We struck out five times and missed several balls in the outfield. We can’t afford to be Gallenberging it up out there, guys," said Pianolegs. After someone mentioned getting the girls to play on the Real Chili team, Hanley went on to mutter something about Hollywood blockbusters Juwanna Mann and Ladybugs.
One of the few bright spots for Davis was the stuff of rookie pitcher Nick “David Wells” Meyers. Meyers, possibly boosted by an unknown drinking agent, threw strikes and kept the ball from being hit hard. After the game, league officials tested Meyers’ concoction of what was believed to be beer and cold medicine for banned substances, but results came back inconclusive.
A team practice has been scheduled for Monday at 6 to iron out some offensive and defensive struggles. “We really need to work on catching balls, getting them into the infield, and hitting more line drives,” Manager Hanley stated in his post game tirade. “That will all be addressed on Monday.”
While some have said Davis is poised to make its move, others aren’t so certain. The lowly Davis plays this coming Friday at 6 against ACM Fire Protection, no doubt a team full of barrel-chested old-timers salivating at the thought of facing thus far the league’s most ineffective offense.
Once again, Davis found itself down early. Early wildness on behalf of The Bub led to nine quick runs by Tracks. As The settled into a grove in the later innings, his defense abandoned him. Pop-ups were finding the ground like nervous and awkward social outcasts at the 2004 National Spelling Bee. However, unlike the latter, the pop-ups could not spell, "Alapecoid.” Meanwhile, grounders were booted around the infield and outfielders threw the ball unsystematically to areas with no backup fielders. Manager Pianolegs Hanley said, “We’ve really got some stuff to work on.” Tracks hit the ball hard very infrequently, yet managed to score 20 runs.
The hitting wasn’t much better for the Davis squad. Most of the balls put into play were softly hit ground balls. The Tracks infield was weak and often allowed the squibbers to become singles. However, as men reached base, force-outs at second made it difficult to convert without hitting the ball out of the infield. When the Real Chili hitters hit the ball in the air, they seldom drove it far. The happy medium between pop flies and grounders that is the line drive was not achieved often tonight. Consequently, Davis struggled to push runners across the plate.
Real Chili Davis will try its luck again next week in a rematch with Damage Control at 7:00, weather permitting.
The game did not start well, and it came as a real test of Davis’ poise. Davis pitcher, The Bub, started the evening with extreme wildness. He walked the first five batters throwing very few strikes. However, he somehow got out of the inning giving up only two runs. Following the inning, The Bub made some changes to his delivery, including moving up closer to the batter and pitching off of a different foot, which greatly helped his control. He would walk only one more batter and strike out two for the next five innings.
Even though The Bub settled into a groove, Davis again found itself down six runs early. The Davis offense, sparked largely by a new bat, clawed back in the third inning scoring six runs on five hits and two walks. At this point, the downtrodden Davis squad realized it had a good chance to win. Once again, though, Real Chili did not want to make it easy on itself. It allowed two runs to score in the top of the fourth. With the 10:00 deadline quickly approaching, the team needed to put some runs up quick, which it did in the fifth inning. With two outs, it wasn’t looking good until Old Hoss Brubaker hit a triple to the wall driving home the first run of the inning. Nick Meyers followed with lined shot off the middle of the wall for a game-tying RBI double. Matt Christel followed with an infield single up the middle. As the Prostar middle-infield fondled Christel’s single, Meyers audaciously swiped home for the go-ahead run. Pianolegs Hanley and Triebs would follow with singles to load the bases for John Marek, who drew an RBI walk, his second walk of the game. Manager Hanley said, “I love the RBI walk. It’s my favorite play in all of sports.” The bases remained loaded for Eric Voight, who drilled a 3-run double down the left field line to add some much needed insurance, making the game 13-8.
Davis needed every bit of insurance it got. Prostar struck for four quick runs in the top of the sixth, but The Bub closed the door getting the final batter to foul out with the tying run on second. A gleeful Davis manager said of the victory, “This was an awesome game. Everyone contributed in a meaningful way. We didn’t play our best game defensively, specifically that goofball shortstop of ours, but we made the plays when we needed to. Our offense finally did what it needed to do and we got a hard-earned victory. This is the first step towards a good year.” The Davis manager then proceeded to give most of his teammates hugs.
Davis, now 1-3, will take on O.B.’s next Friday at 6:00.
Nick Meyers gave Davis an early 3-1 lead with a 3-run blast in the first. However, the lead didn't last long, as Tracks took the game over in the top of the third. Three errors by the Davis outfield in the third allowed 5 runs to score. Many routine fly balls were hit, but the outfielders had trouble keeping their feet under them. Davis manager James Hanley said, "Our boys just weren't prepared for these weather conditions. None of our outfielders had cleats. Playing in this kind of rain, there was no way any of them could make cuts or get a jump on the ball. It looked like a circus out there."
Hanley moved second-baseman Chris Banach to the outfield in the fourth, but it was one inning too late. With his cleats, Banach helped settle down the outfield defense for the remainder of the game. He also had a solid day at the plate going 3/4 with a double.
More defensive miscues and some strong hitting by Tracks put the game away late. Tracks put up 3 runs in the sixth and 5 in the seventh to silence a comeback effort by Real Chili in the later stages of the game. Wadewitz, who was unsatisfied with an inconsistent strike zone remarked, "I don't know what the hell this umpire is doing." With the help of pitching coach Skip Adams, Wadewitz kept his head and finished out the game.
The Davis manager remained pleased with his teams efforts after the game saying, "I think this team showed a lot of potential out there tonight. We've got two, maybe three, future all-stars out there, Charlie. Tracks' guys all had cleats, and we didn't. Perhaps with a little better footing, we could have avoided the two big innings that killed us. Our hitting wasn't bad, but we definitely have room to improve on defense. This was only one game, and we'll get better as the season goes along."
Real Chili Davis hopes to notch its first win of the year next week against bitter rival Damage Control.
(April 10th) Well, the injuries keep on piling up. Matt went down today with a nasty eye injury seen to the left. Unfortunately, not many people came to practice today. We really have a lot to do in the next three weeks, and I'm not going to have any time to do much of anything. At most we can go out once a weekend for the next two weekends. Out first game is less than three weeks away. We need to get our player cards in very soon, so I need money from many people very soon. I wish I had time to make player profiles and other fun stuff, but I really won't until the summer starts. So, anyone with some time who is willing to help out doing something can let me know. Since time is tight, I need to know in advance when people can make it to practice so that I'm not scheduling a time when only 4 people will be there.
Get back to me with any questions you have and with anything you are willing to do to help the team out. I will continue to keep posting this site since it is easier for me than emailing or IMing 14 different people.
You all can email me at James.Hanley@marquette.edu or instant message my name "The Ytsejames"