Okay so we have already had one great interview so far in the magazine but I couldn't let the magazine be released without this very special interview with a very special person who is very close to my heart.
Wow! What a moment this is! The opportunity to interview my wife for KTCB! A lot of you out there ask about her and she agreed to do this interview to let you know a little bit about herself.
KTCB: When and
how did you become a Christian?
Kerstin: When
did I become a Christian, and how? I guess the latter part of that question
is simple: through the grace of God! But I guess that is not exactly what
you had in mind. Well, I grew up in a Christian family and have therefore,
in a way, always considered myself to be a Christian. Not that growing
up in a Christian home automatically makes me a Christian, but what I mean
is that to some degree I have always seemed to have a personal relationship
to Jesus. I made a conscious decision though when I was roughly 15, at
an evangelistic meeting in my home church. For quite a while afterwards
I wasn't sure though whether that step was induced by the fact that I had
seen some of my friends go to the front or whether it was truly God's calling
at that time. Whatever way, I reckon God can call you through whatever
means He chooses, so with hindsight I accepted it as His call to me personally,
and the conversion process has been ongoing ever since.
KTCB: What is
your favourite verse or passage in the Bible?
Kerstin: Oh
dear, I find that hard to say since every time I open the Bible or someone
expounds the Word to me I find myself thinking "Hey, that's a fab verse!
I've got to remember this!". But one passage that has been special to me
ever since I got baptised and that has cropped up at vital moments throughout
the years in different ways is Proverbs 3:5-6 - my baptism verses that
a friend of mine chose for me (in Germany we've got the habit of choosing
one special person as our "companion in baptism" - I guess on similar lines
like other denominations have godparents) "Trust in the Lord with all your
heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge
Him and He shall direct your path." It seems God has spoken to me through
these verses on numerous occasions and they have guided, helped, encouraged,
admonished and spurred me on probably more than any other passage in the
Bible. Apart from these, I could probably list at least 27 others which
I shall refrain from, however. Oh, and then there is of course our wedding
verse in Psalm 37:4 "Delight yourself in the Lord and He shall give you
the desires of your heart" - and how I have experienced this to be oh so
true!
KTCB: Do you
have a favourite Christian book?
Kerstin: Oh,
I'm awful with this! I've got a pea brain when it comes to remembering
such things. I love reading and would consider myself quite an avid reader
(though not as frantic probably as certain other people who shall go unnamed!
[I have no idea who she can mean - Ed.]) but my problem is that
after so many books I go "WOW!! What a fantastic book!!!!" - then I start
reading the next one and I can hardly tell you anymore what exactly the
previous one was about (my great hope is that what I read would stick with
me at least subconsciously and change me maybe even without me noticing
or remembering much). I mean I have a general idea but I am convinced that
that part of my brain that was supposed to be for such things must be shrivelled
up inside my head. Anyway, a few books do come to my mind after all where
I remember having been greatly blessed after reading them. These are "Don't
just stand there, pray something" and "When Heaven is silent" both by Ronald
Dunn, "The Life God Blesses" by Gordon MacDonald, "Heaven - What will it
be like?" by Joni Eareckson Tada (the very best book on heaven I have ever
read!!), "God meant it for Good" by R.T. Kendall, and….now, you have to
help me here…oh yes, definitely "The Grace Awakening" by Chuck Swindoll
(the most liberating book I've ever read!!). …. And "A Voice in the Wind"
thanks to Tim (yes, the Tim you all love!) - he sent it to us not long
ago and I tell you, I have hardly ever literally devoured a book like this
one! It was so amazing, moving, challenging and incredible. Can't wait
to read the two follow-ups!……That was a long answer, I'm sorry!
KTCB: That's
okay, we don't mind people who have a lot to say. I am sure that some of
the books you have mentioned would be good for others to check out.
So who are your
favourite Christian singers?
Kerstin: My
favourite Christian singers would definitely have to be Steve Green, Ray
Boltz, Don Francisco, Twila Paris and Point of Grace (I can hear the cheers!),
although I'm quite easy and enjoy a good variety of music. (That was a
short answer for once!)
KTCB: What is
the most amazing experience of God's work in your heart and life that you
can think
Kerstin: Now
we are getting to the tricky bit. How many pages have I got?
KTCB: As many
as you like! of?
Kerstin: One
of my most amazing experiences with God have to do with a period in my
life that I normally like to keep secret - I'm not very sure why, probably
because it makes me very vulnerable and I fear that from then on people
will judge the way I do things by that. Blahblahblah - I'm talking in riddles.
I am, on the other hand, however, also aware that God has maybe made me
go through this in order for me to share it with others. Anyway, here it
comes: a good ten years ago I was anorexic. I can't remember when it started,
I guess I gradually slipped into it over years and years. As you might
know, the symptoms of anorexia merely point to deeply rooted problems.
Again, I cannot fix these problems to certain events in my life that brought
them about. I had (and still do) loving parents, a good church, friends,
the works, and yet something inside me started to rebel at some point.
And that was expressed by me becoming anorexic. During this time I have
experience the parent-love of God through my parents like I never had before.
While all I could do was lying on my bed depressed to the core and ready
to give up, not able or willing to pray, my Mum would sit with me day after
day, night after night and pray for and with me, and just be there with
a deeply felt love. While for some reason at that point in time I despised
my Dad (which I am ashamed to admit because I have always loved him dearly
- I guess I just did because he represented in a way what I was rebelling
against: authority, control, expectations, etc.) and treated him in quite
a despicable way, he never once stopped loving me and letting me know that
he loved me still, and that he refused to believe that my momentary feelings
were "the real me" (my words), but only some cry that needed to be heard.
The more obnoxious I was, the more love he showed. That well and truly
knocked me for six!
The other amazing
experience I had during this time was really a miracle in the truest sense.
One Sunday evening, while I was as usual in my room behind closed doors
growling at the world, feeling miserable and sorry for myself and hating
everything and everyone (bar a very few exceptions), my parents and sister
were sitting in cosy togetherness in the living-room. I don't know how
it happened but the next thing I knew is I found myself in the kitchen
in front of an open fridge and ate everything in sight - without the slightest
trace of the suicidal feelings I'd had up to then whenever anything edible
passed my lips. I know it is very hard to understand for those of you who
don't know much about anorexia or indeed for anyone who's never gone through
it. Eating for an anorexic person is not (as falsely assumed by some) all
about not putting on weight - as I mentioned that is only the symptom.
It is about the only control you feel you've got left in your life, and
if that goes you might as well pack it in. Every morsel of food is a breakdown
of or crack in this control, a defeat, a failure - and an unspeakable sense
of panic and utter hopelessness and despair sets in. However, on that Sunday
evening for some reason that I can only explain as being a true miracle,
I did not feel any of this. All I felt was such freedom, such pure, dazzling
light, such beauty, hope and joy. My parents and sister were still sitting
in the living-room and had no idea what was going on with me. On my way
back to my room I knew I had two choices: I could either go back to my
room, close the door and pretend that had never happened, and never admit
"defeat" (that however, as mentioned, I didn't really feel then), or I
could grasp that one chance that God had given me and break free by calling
my Mum (who during my anorexic time was more or less the only one I would
talk to) and telling her all about what had just happened, thereby making
it impossible in a way to go back to the old way. Thank God I did the latter.
And I never ever regretted it! I still didn't feel like defeat when I told
my parents because all I could feel was that someone had released some
heavy, heavy chains off of me and given me nothing but love for everyone,
hope, joy, a total thrill and freedom, freedom, freedom!
That was the turning
point. I still had quite a way to go, because after all, the underlying
problems needed to be dealt with. So I went into therapy for 8 months during
which I still had to face some hard times but I had innumerable other marvellous
experiences with God where I experienced Him in ways I had never done before.
I'm still struggling
a wee bit with certain issues, but with God's help "I'm getting there"
and by His grace I am what I am.
I had actually intended to say a few things about the Summer Bible School in Hamburg where I met you, Dougie (need I explain that the interviewer is at the same time my husband?? Lucky me - I can cuddle my own interviewer![the Editor suddenly is overcome with a blushing cheek!] ), as this was one of the rare times I experienced the Holy Spirit and answers to every single prayer I prayed during that time as I had hardly ever done before. I felt I could have prayed for anything and it would for some reason have been granted to me. But seeing that I have already "outtalked my welcome" I shall refrain from it.
KTCB: Well you
haven't outtalked your welcome at all, I am sure that all you have said
will be of great benefit to our readers and will maybe give them an insight
into exactly what anorexcia is.
Who has been the greatest
influence in your life, and why?
Kerstin: My
greatest influence would have to be……oh, I don't know. Do you mean apart
from Jesus?
KTCB: Of course.
Kerstin: Hmmm.
That requires some serious thought. Present people excepted? I guess I
could now fall into a tirade of how you as my husband have been a great
influence on me - and I would mean every word. How you have challenged
me to think through and form my own opinions about issues I have never
really given much thought (especially biblical ones), how you have helped
me and encouraged me to try and worry less (I am unfortunately a natural
born worrier!), how you have been a pillar of strength and encouragement
to me throughout all these years, how you have shown me what unconditional
love is….but that might embarrass you. [It would not embarrass me at
all! - Editor] Therefore I shall swiftly move on to my parents for
the above reasons and because I have long since considered them to be true
Proverbs 31 parents (I know that passage applies to women, but if there
was an equivalent for men, that would apply to my Dad). I know they are
just as human and fallible as the rest of us but they have taught me vital
lessons in life. Then there have been numerous other people who in some
way or other have been an influence.
KTCB: Growing
up in a Christian family must have been good but do you see problems ahead
for those who have all their lives known the gospel?
Kerstin: Yes,
growing up in a Christian family can be both a blessing and…well, in my
case not a curse, but in a way a problem at the same time. In the light
of the above experiences it seems rather stupid to say I wish I'd had a
total, radical, 180-degree, world-to-Christ conversion, one of those "Wow-ieh!"
experiences that you get when your are turned upside down, inside out,
back to front. But that is what I have sometimes thought. Because God and
the Bible have always been a part of my life, I guess I started to take
it for granted, it became in a way "nothing special" anymore, part of your
life like eating and drinking, and school, and everything else that regulates
your life. There is a definite danger of becoming so over-familiar with
God, faith and the church that you lose the true meaning and purpose and
importance. Also, I see the danger of being "spoon-fed" in the church.
You grow up and get to know what your family, your friends, your pastor,
your church believe and you grow right into it without thinking for yourself,
just adopting what you are taught. There are so many issues that come up
where I have to realise that I have no idea what my own opinion is because
I have never really thought them through, but have unknowingly repeated
in a robot-like fashion what I had heard. Not that my home church did not
encourage us to think for ourselves. I consider this church to be a very
good, biblical church with an exemplary pastor. But there is a definite
danger there, however it is difficult to pinpoint the root, the cause of
this problem. I don't know the answer but somehow we have to try and do
everything to keep the "sensation", the excitement, the newness of the
Gospel, the living, vital relationship with God and the specialness and
awesomeness of our Lord Jesus alive in our children, that, yes, it becomes
such a deeply rooted part in your life like in a way everything else, but
also that it will always still remain different from the rest. That you
would miss it if it wasn't there like you would miss eating and drinking
and breathing, but not that it turns into something that you are hardly
aware of and do automatically or routinely, or that turns into some "also-rans"
part, if you know what I mean. The reality of the Gospel can be harder
to see - I'm not saying that is so in all cases, but I'm speaking of the
danger that we need to be aware of. I guess it is the same with everything
that you grow up with or have had for a long, long time and that is nothing
special to you anymore, but to those who are new to it, it might be overwhelming.
If you have always been rich in your life, money is nothing special anymore,
buying things is part of the routine; if you have always been a brainbox
at school and things fall into your lap easily; if you have always lived
in a paradisical spot on this planet that you are so used to its beauty
- all these things will be far, far more thrilling, life-changing, awesome
and incredible to people who haven't had that.
I'm not saying, I
would like to swap places with someone who didn't grow up in a Christian
home, but I am saying that we need to be very, very much aware of dangers
on this side of the road as well, and as those who are able to do something
about it, not to be so complacent to think or have a false sense of security
of an "easy road to travel". Am I making sense?
KTCB: Coming
through loud and clear. You know Kerstin, a lot of people who read this
magazine and who frequent the Point of Grace Chat Room ask about you, so
would you like to pass on a wee message to them?
Kerstin: They
do??? Wow-ieh! (blush) I don't know what to say! Why are they so good to
me? I hardly know them, they hardly know me (not that I don't want to get
to know them - they seem like people who are definitely worth getting to
know!)……why??
Okay. A wee message.
I guess if there was a word approximately a gazilion times stronger than
"Thank you", and if you multiplied that by another gazilion - well, that
would come close to my "wee message". But seriously, I am always positively
struck by the love, fellowship, friendship and goodness that people express
both to Dougie and I. To be a part of it seems amazing. You are very dear,
special people, folks! Don't ever believe that you are not making a difference
in someone's life! I would like to be as much a friend to you as you are
to me!
KTCB: Finally
can you explain a little to us about your work as translator and do you
hope to use that in some way to serve the Lord?
Kerstin: Final
question (boy, aren't you all glad that Dougie hasn't chosen any more questions?!)
- my work. Oh, where to begin…Well, I have been a freelance translator
for exactly one year now, after having worked in a translating agency for
4 1/2 years. And it's been a dream come true. Not that there weren't trying
times, and still are (see above…worrier…not trusting in your own understanding….),
but I would never have imagined that things would take off so well so quickly.
When I started out on my own, other established translators had warned
me that I needed to be patient, that it would take a good year or so to
get established, etc. But God had other plans and blessings. And by His
grace I have been "up and running" for most of my first year. In order
to get most of my clients I had to do what I hated most - phoning around
and making yourself known. I have had the good fortune (can you say that
as a Christian?) that I was able to take the one or other client with me
from my days in the agency, who did no longer want to work with the agency
because of prices, and who seemed to be quite happy to stick with me. My
day starts depending on my schedule of work. There have been times when
I could start pottering about, waiting for jobs to come in, at around 9
a.m. and when I was able to finish up very early. There have also been
days that were totally quiet, where I would then read, do other work or
things that need to be done, phone around some more, write letters, pester
Dougie at work (by phone [ She is no pest at all - Editor]), and,
and, and. And there have been those days where I worked literally non-stop
from 6 a.m. right through to 11 o'clock at night, with only a wee break
at lunchtime to go jogging. I normally go out jogging around lunchtime
to give my brain and my muscles a break. I am a jogaholic - well, not quite,
but I am quite partial to it. Have always been, as long as I can think.
Also, after having sat at the computer for 4-6 hours in the morning, my
bones and muscles cry out to get released. And my brain always seems to
be cleared and nice and refreshed then for the "afternoon session". I translate
basically everything bar really technical stuff. Finances aren't my forte
either but for some bizarre reason these texts seem to force themselves
upon me. Some funny kind of humour on God's part?? At present I am involved
in a mega-project that has been ongoing since January and will be for another
good few months. On top of all the regular and one-off stuff I am getting
sometimes daily. What else? Does that explain a bit about my work? I have
just sent of my very first tax return, by the way, and am mighty proud
of myself!
Do I envisage serving
the Lord through my work? Don't I already? No, I know what you mean. Well,
I'd love to, but I am a bit like Moses "Lord, what on earth could you possibly
achieve through me, little Mrs. Nobody?!". But I have always wondered why
and for what purpose the Lord has given me such a love for the English
language ever since I started learning it. Who knows, maybe one day He'll
tell me what the special purpose is. Maybe one day, with my gift for languages
and your (Dougie) book-mania the Lord can use us as a team to supply the
German Christian book market with all the wonderful books that seem to
exist only in English but that I would love to see my family and friends
read! The Lord's mind is so much higher and so much more mysterious than
ours, however. I just hope and pray that when He'll tell me, I'll be eagerly
listening!
This has been a real
joy to be able to interview my wife for KTCB. She is a beautiful gift from
God to me and I am so grateful to have her by my side. Look out in future
issues as we might see Kerstin writing an article or
two for us here at KTCB.
If you would
like to contact Kerstin she would be very happy to hear from you I am sure,
E mail her at dwatson@easynet.co.uk
