COOL THINGS THAT PEOPLE SAY...

Just a few quotes I've collected and have been given...



"Since Americans throw rice at weddings, does that mean that orientals throw hamburgers?"(?)


"Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appesr bright until you hear
 them speak"(?)


"When I look at the television, I want to see me staring right back at me"
(Counting Crows-Mr Jones)


"If it is zero degrees today, and it is supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow; how cold is it 
going to be?"(?)


"Why do you press the buttons on the remote control when you know the battery is dead?(?)


"Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?"(?)

"Why do people without a watch look at their wrists when you ask them what time it is?"(?)


"Does the reverse side also have a reverse side?"(?)


"If the universe is everything and scientist say that it is expanding, what is it expanding to?"(?)


"If you got into a taxi and the driver started driving backwards, would he owe you money?"(?)


"What would a chair look like if your knees bent the other way?"(?)


"If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it?"(?)


"When I erase a word with my pencil, where does the word go?"(?)


"Tell a man there are 400 billion stars in the sky and he will believe you. Tell there's wet paint 
on a bench and he has to touch it."(?)


"If con is the opposite of pro, what is the opposite of progress?"(?)


"Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?"(?)


"Last night I dreamt I was a butterfly. Or am I today a butterfly dreaming I am a man?"(?)


"IF we are ever to love a butterfly, we must first care for  a few caterpillars."(?)


"I don't mind what is written about me so long as it isn't true"(Katherine Hepburne)


"Let there be light"... and there was... and He saw that the light was good."(Genisis-the holy bible)


"I do not want people to be agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them"(Jane Austin)


I am an invisible man. No, I am not a spook like those who haunted Edgar Allen Poe: 
nor am I one of your Hollywood movie ecoplasms. I am a man of substance, of flesh 
and bone, fibre and liquids- and I might even be said to have a mind. I am invisible
simply becase people refuse to see me."(Ralph Ellison)


"When I discover who I am, I'll be free."(Ralph Ellison)


"Don't bother to be better than your contemporaries or predecessors. Try to be better 
than yourself."(William Faulkner)


"Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no
one's definition of your life, but defie yourself."(Harvey Firestein)


"One should be able to see that things are hopeless and yet be determined to make 
them otherwise."(F. Scott Fitzgerald)


"All intelegent thought have already been thought, what is neccessary is to try 
to think them again."(Goethe)


"To avoid criticism do nothing, say nothing, be nothing."(Elbert Hubbard)


"Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored."(Aldous Huxley)


"Faith means not wanting to know what's true."(Friedrich Nietzche)


"We don't see things as they are. We see things as we are."(Anais Nin)


"Anxiety is loves greatest killer. It makes one feel as you might when a drowning 
person holds on to you. You'd like to save him, but you know he will strangle you
in his panic."(Anais Nin)


"So now I know the things I know
And do the things I do
And if you do not like me so
To hell, my love, with you"(Dorothy Parker)


"When I die, I hope I go to heaven. Whatever the hell that is."(Ayn Rand)


I do not recognize anyones right to one minute of my life."(Ayn Rand)


The secret of happiness is to face the fact that the world is horrible, horrible, 
horrible...(Bertrand Russell)


"Some of my best friends are children. In fact, all my best friends are children."
(J.D. Salinger)


I have often wished I had time to cultivate modesty... but I am too busy thinking
about myself."(Edith Sidwell)


"The man who goes alone can start today, but he who travels with another must wait
till that other is ready."(Henry David Thoreau)


"I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude."(Henry David Thoreau) 


The man who does not read books has no advantage over the man who can not read
them."(Mark Twain)


"I think it pisses God off if you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and 
don't notice it."(Alice Walker)


"You can't hold a man down without staying down with him."(Booker T. Washington)


"He drew a circle that shut me out- Heretic, rebel, a thing to flout. But love 
and I had the witt to win, we drew a circle that took him in."(Edwin Markham)


To live is so startling it leaves little time for anything else."(Emily Dickinson)


"Only those that risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go."(T.S. Elliot)


"I may disagree with what you have to say, but I shall defend, to the death, your 
right to say it."(Voltaire)


"The books that the world calls immoral are the books that show the world its
own shame."(Oscar Wilde)


"I am not young enough to know everything."(Oscer Wilde)


"When one door of happiness closes another door opens, but we often look so long 
at the closed door that we don't see the one that has opened."(Helen Keller)


"If you're going through hell, keep going."(Winston Churchill)


"Don't be so humble- you aren't that great."(Golda Meir)


"You must do the thing you think you can not do."(Eleanor Roosevelt)


"Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans."(John Lennon)


"I've been trying for some time to cultivate a lifestyle that doesn't 
require my presence."(Gary Trudeau)


"All my life I've wanted to be someone; I guess I should have been more 
specific."(Jane Wagner)


"If you drink, don't park.Accidents cause people."


"'I meant,' said Ipslore bitterly, 'What is there in this world that truely makes 
life worthwhile?' Death thought about it 'Cats' he said eventually. 'Cats 
are nice.'"(Terry Pratchett)


"I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it."(Garrison Keilor)


"I am a DEEPLY superficial person."(Andy Warhol)


"Everything you can imagine is real."(Pablo Picasso)


"Maybe it's in the basement, let me go upstairs and check."(M.C. Escher)


"That's the way things become clear: all of a sudden. And then you realize how 
obvious they've been all along."(Madeleine L'Engle)


"Listen three eyes, don't you try to outwierd me. I get stranger things than 
you with my breakfast cereal."(Douglas Adams)


"Rabbit's clever" said Pooh thoughtfully. 
"Yes," said Piglet, "Rabbit's clever."
"And he has a brain."
"Yes," said Piglet, "rabbit had a brain."
There was a long silence. 
"I suppose," said Pooh, "That's why he never understands anything."


"They're funny, accidents. You never have them until you're having them." (Eeyore)


"One can't complain. I have my friends. Why someone spoke to me only 
yesterday."(Eeyore)


"Oh Lisa! You and you're stories! Bart's a vamoire! Beer kills brain cells! 
Now let's get back to that... building... thingie... where our beds and T.V.
... is." (Homer Simpson)


"You tried your best and failed miserably. The lesson is. never try. " (Homer Simpson)



My crazy life
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