QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS
1. When did you decide to do this?
I have wanted to be in the military for a long, long time. I haven’t mentioned it except in passing among family because I never thought it would be received well. My decision to join the Marine Corps was made final in April 1999 after a full year of serious reflection and discussion with John and consultation after consultation with Marine Corps recruiters and friends we’ve made in the Marine Corps.
2. Why have you waited so long to tell us?
Like I said before, I have been afraid and am still afraid to discuss this with family. My fear is that my family will not support this decision – that they will think I’m not strong enough or that it’s a bad move on my part. I love all of you and really want your approval. I suspect that’s true for anyone. So…I’ve kept this desire quiet for fear of disapproval and rejection. I’ve learned that relationships, even family ones, are fragile. The last thing I ever meant to do with this was hurt someone. I sincerely hope that my loved ones will understand both my decision to do this and my decision to keep all of this quiet until I was sure I was going to do it.
3. How does John feel about this?
John is 100%, full swing, behind this decision. It was practically his idea. He and I have discussed this many times in great detail, and he feels that it will be the best thing I’ve ever done. He is currently my “coach.” He works me and coaches me and grills me on Marine Corps Values, history, and other goodies that I’ll need to have memorized. He helps me work out, and he tells me every day that he is glad I’m doing this. Beyond this answer, you’ll have to ask John.
4. What are your plans for finishing college if you do this?
My plans for college will be the same in the Marine Corps as they are out here in the civilian world. My only reason for wanting to finish college is to please my family. I have a vague interest in finishing a degree, but I’m in no hurry whatsoever. I’ve been making better money than my degreed colleagues and, at present, college is not my priority. I have been working off and on toward finishing my BS in Business Marketing for the past two years. I am roughly ½ way done, but my life will be complete in my eyes with or without a degree. If after I finish MOS school I feel a renewed need to finish college, the Marine Corps has many plans for helping me both financially and logistically with completing my degree.
5. How do you intend to have a family in the Marine Corps?
I don’t really think that this question is any of anyone’s business. John and I will reproduce when we think we’re ready, and John and I will raise our children as we see fit. If and when we get pregnant, we’ll fill everyone in on the details. People raise children in the military all the time – have for centuries. We’ll manage.
6. Where will you be living, and how often will you be away from family?
When this is all done, the Marine Corps will station us wherever they see fit. Most likely, we will be in either Camp Lejeune, NC or Camp Pendleton, CA. There are no guarantees, however, and it is a real possibility that we will move around a lot. This is the part of Marine life that appeals most to both me and John. We love an adventure, and we love trying new places together. Denver, Colorado will always be home, but the prospect of trying a new place is always welcome.
7. Why do you want to be in the military?
Well, beyond the explanation I gave in my “Why am I Doing This?” page, I can give three reasons off the top of my head. First, I am a patriot. I love this country and I want to be a part of the force that defends it. Second, I want to belong to something. The Marine Corps is the closest-knit family that I have ever encountered. When John was in Boot Camp, I felt a belonging stronger than I know how to properly describe. I want to be a part of that. Third, I want to challenge myself. I can’t think of a more fascinating challenge than this. That’s only three. I could probably give you at least 50 more that John and I have unearthed in our decision-making process.
8. Aren’t you afraid of having to go into a combat situation or a war?
Of course I am. Even though women are not technically ever placed in combat situations, women do end up in danger from time to time. Just like a man wouldn’t, I don’t relish the thought of dying in a battle or war situation. Facing the possibility of death is part of joining the military, and I accept that risk. Death is a risk in everyday life. I won’t let that risk deter me from doing this.
9. Don’t you realize that women in the military have a tough time?
Yes, I do. I know that a lot of military personnel have a problem with women and the politics of feminism in the military. I, however, don’t really care. I know that at this time, the politics of gender are more favorable to women than they ever have been in the past. I’m not worried about it.
10. You’ve never been an athlete, Amy. How do you think you’re going to do this?
Oh, that’s a toughie. I guess that anyone asking this question will want more than “diet and exercise” for an answer. All I can give you is this: I’m working on it harder than you’ll ever know. My life right now reads, “Get up. Work out. Eat. Go to work. Go Home. Work out. Eat. Shower. Go to bed.” I am seeing major results, but you’ll all have to wait for the before and after photos. Ha ha ha.
A FINAL STATEMENT
I am doing this. It’s real. It’s not a phase, a fancy, or a passing whim. I want all of you to know that if you want to talk to me about this in person, I do welcome that. Call me or write to me or even send me an email. I have only one request. That request is that you respect my feelings and the awesome amount of thought and preparation that went into making this decision. If all you want to do is talk me out of it or scold me, then be prepared to confront a side of me that only dear friends and my husband have ever been witness to. Most of you who took the time to read this know that I am a stubborn, pig-headed young woman. I have chosen this on my own, and the choice was made with a conviction 2nd only to my decision to marry John. This is some serious stuff I’m talking about, here. I truly want to answer all your questions and give you comfort in this decision. I love all of you and I want your support, understanding, and approval. Call on me any time you want to discuss this.
Love and hugs,
Amy
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The background image on this page is a slightly altered version of an photo that showed up in my email. I saved it long ago and do not remember who sent it to me. I'm assuming that this image is not copyright protected, but if it is and you know who I should give credit to for it, please, please let me know.
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Semper fidelis et semper gratus,
Amy L.
Creator – The US Military Spouses' Club
https://www.angelfire.com/co/militarywives/