God. I can't believe it's March. It's MARCH. Where the hell did February go? It's almost hockey playoffs, for crying out loud.

I forget how fast the spring semester goes. Notice how I speak like I've been in school many semesters. But seriously, last semester I'd just figured out everyone's names, when suddenly we were waving good-bye after the final. This semester is exactly the same way.

Except...except the chipper attitude I had last year is gone. I am starting to turn into a looney toon. I guess I've Grown Up, but I didn't realize Growing Up meant becoming the bitter, owly person all my older friends were. It's so scary. I think about the naive 17 year old I was, bouncing up to my friends and saying "Gosh, why do you hate everyone?" and the cold, pitying glance they gave me.

I have that look now. I give that look to people. Everything, everyone drives me insane. When I ride the lightrail, it takes just about everything I've got *not* to scream at the person next to me, "WOULD YOU FUCKING STOP CRACKING EACH AND EVERY GODDAMN JOINT IN YOUR FINGER! I GUESS IT'S OBVIOUS WHY YOU RIDE THE TRAIN--YOU CAN'T STOP SCREWING WITH YOURSELF!"

Ahem.
Everyone except me and a few select people are stupid. I actually find myself telling them how stupid they are. Like, in public speaking, this chick took 20 minutes to set up the DVD player. You were supposed to come in and learn the equipment beforehand. If you didn't, you got knocked down points. Of course, the teacher didn't stick to the rule. And I made my annoyance known at this. Later, when he made the comment about how well I should be prepared for my speech (thanks to the week long delay) and if I wasn't, I'd lose points, I said "Yeah well, some people were supposed to be prepared to use the DVD player too." He told me that was out of line. I fail to see how.

But there's no point in keeping quiet anymore. People dislike you regardless. I seem to be disliked even when I'm nice. My entire English class hates me because...well, I am not sure why. I think it's because I'm young and cool. I have Spongebob Squarepants hanging on my backpack and an artsy photo of Bono on my 3 ring. This marks me as bizarre, but it's still sad to see a bunch of 25-40 year olds whispering shit about me as I give my theory on one of the Canterbury Tales. Really, people. This is college. And my Middle English is flawless.

Anyway, this rant has gone on a weird path. But my point is...I'm starting to hate everyone. Everyone and everything. I am trying really hard to stop this, I don't *want* to end up like the antisocial, underground people I've known in my life. I try not to let them, whoever they are, get to me.

If they just would stop cracking their fingers on the train....

Elisabeth