I Am A Demented Soul -- Fanfic -- Anyone Got A Flashlight?

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Disclaimer: Bleh...you know this already. I own any original characters in the story (me and my friends) but everyone else is owned by Marvel.

Okay, I wasn't planning on writing a sequel, but I gave in to the masses (and I got inspired by a little incident that I had recently....O_o). So, here ya go. This one's a little longer......and not as funny, if you ask me. There's a little more angst in this chapter, but you be the judge. And if you're wondering who Marian is, then read Liz's fanfic "My Partner In Crime."

Enjoy... ^_^

Anyone Got A Flashlight?
by Jen (padme_76@yahoo.com)

Chapter 2: Squabbles

True to his word, Harry restarted "Hannibal" from the beginning. He figured Norman would want to see the scene when Mason Verger tore his face off. Recently his father was taking an interest in violent films......O_o

MJ was practically begging Harry to stop the DVD. "I don't want to see that again! It was awful!!" She squeaked.

Harry just snickered. "You had your eyes closed the whole time, MJ."

"That's beside the point! I could hear him ripping his face off! Ugh!!!" She shuddered.

Harry shrugged. "Hey! I'm just rewinding it for my dad!"

"Oh.... you're such a great son, aren't you?" Felica grinned wryly.

Harry frowned. "Was that a compliment?"

She rolled her eyes. "No, it was meant to be sarcastic, Harry..."

Norman flashed a dirty look at Felica, and turned back to his son. "Oh, just ignore her. It's probably PMS or something.."

"WHAT?!" She whacked Norman on the arm.

"Ow!...." He rubbed his arm gingerly and glared at her. "...or maybe not."

Harry turned to narrow his eyes at her, as well. "Oh, thanks so much....first you insult me, then you beat up my dad!" He suddenly got a wicked glint in his eyes and went to turn off the lights.

"Okay! Okay...I'm sorry! Geez....." Felica said.

He turned the lights off, anyway. Everyone yelped, screamed or complained....except for Norman, who was chuckling to himself. Harry's voice was heard: "That's what you get for messing with me! Ha ha!"

"Ack! Don't do that! I'm scared of the dark!" Peter cried.

Harry shone a flashlight at his face, and grinned at his roommate. "That's just too bad, isn't it?" He cackled.

Peter sank further into his seat and pulled his blanket over his head. MJ scooted closer to Peter and shared his blankie.

"We can sit together, 'kay?" She shot Harry a do-that-again-and-I'll-personally-castrate-you look. "You are positively evil, you know that?"

Norman was trying his best not to laugh at the irony of it all..... then again, he WAS beginning to worry about his son. Harry was always rather..... weird.

Flash snorted at the two lovebirds and threw popcorn at them. "Eh, you two are such babies!"

"Am not!" Peter scowled, but not before scooping up some of the tossed popcorn from his lap and eating it.

The bickering continued until Norman threatened to turn the power back off. Everyone reluctantly settled down to watch the movie.

(Halfway through the film)

The scene:

Harry and Norman were watching with rapt interest, while MJ kept her hands over her eyes, peeking every so often. Flash and Felica looked bored, and Peter was quivering in the corner, cuddling his blankie. O_o

After two hours or so, the cowards of the group sighed in relief when the credits started rolling.

"Thank god that's over!" Peter rushed to turn the lights back on.

"Coward," Norman muttered.

"Heh... I can't wait for 'Red Dragon' on DVD...." Harry commented idly.

Everyone groaned. Peter was the first to protest. "Ugh, we have to go through this NEXT year???" He moaned.

"Not if I can help it," MJ vowed, eyeing Harry on the floor.

Norman smirked rather sinisterly at her. "Don't even think about it ..." MJ winced and ducked under Peter's blankie.

"I'm hungry. Anyone up for some take out? I could go for some pork-fried rice," Harry quipped.

Everyone hurled a pillow at young Osborn, knocking him off the sofa. Harry starting rolling around on the floor, laughing.

Flash moaned. "Don't mention pork...."

"Actually, don't mention food at all," MJ winced.

Harry snickered at them. "It wasn't THAT gruesome....geez." Everone stared at him....even Norman gave his son a wary look. Harry blinked several times. Feeling a bit uncomfortable with their stares, he cleared his throat. "Okay....so the brain eating part was a little over the top....."

MJ shivered. "Ugh...just a little?!"

Norman almost let out a chuckle. Peter didn't say a word, for fear that Harry or Norman would hit him.

MJ just shook her head and grabbed her handbag. Her face was taking on a greenish hue.... "I have to go, Harry. I don't think I can take much more of this!"

"We only saw one movie so far!"

"That's enough for me! Bye" MJ bolted from the apartment, leaving everyone else to stare in amusment.

Suddenly, Norman's pager went off. "Dammit.... ugh, I gotta go. Sorry Harry...."

Harry scowled in annoyance. "Dad! It's ten at night! Who on earth would be at calling at this hour?!"

Norman frowned as he put on his overcoat. "Mr. Johnson. Something about his cable TV.... This shouldn't take long. I'll be back in a little while." He left the apartment in a hurry.

Peter sighed. "Figures. He IS the landlord..."

Felica twirled her keys in her hand, looking bored to death. "Well...we lost two of 'em. Now what?"

Harry smirked. "We continue the marathon without them! Turn off the lights...we'll watch 'The Shining!'"

Peter moaned and pulled his blankie over his head again. "Nooo....."

--------------------

((about two hours later))

Their audience was dwindling....oh well.

After an hour of trying to remove the video tape the VCR ate, Flash was reduced to watching the Snow Show (in other words, nothing was on). Felica and Harry came in with several bowls of popcorn and a big bottle of Pepsi. They plunked them down on the coffee table next to the beer, and sat on the sofa.

Flash grabbed the remote (which wouldn't really make a difference, since every channel had the Snow Show on). "All right!

We're ready to start!"

Felica was looking around the apartment. "Wait! Where's Peter?"

"Yeah... where is he? He didn't chicken out again, did he?" Harry snickered.

Flash frowned as he flipped through the channels. "Oh, while you guys were in the kitchen, he got a phone call from MJ and then he ran off somewhere. He seemed really upset about something. I wonder what's wrong."

Felica blinked. "Oh! Didn't you know? Mary Jane's pregnant."

Flash dropped the remote in shock. "p...p...pre..."

Harry was in too much of a shock to say anything.

Felica looked at them strangely. "C'mon, guys, say it with me. P-r-e-g-n-a-n-t."

The men just sat there gaping.....

"Hello? What, is it something about the word pregnant? Geez! How 'bout baby? No, wait, sex, there's a goody. C'mon. Say sex five times with me, it'll do you a world of good..."

"Felica, shut the hell up!" Harry scowled.

Felica rolled her eyes. "I just don't see what you're getting all worked up over."

A beat. Then:

Flash suddenly sat up. "Holy shit! MJ's..."

Felica nodded. "Yeah."

Harry gasped. "So that means that Peter..."

"Yup."

Silence fell over the room. Everyone seemed lost in their own thoughts. The Snow Show played unwatched on the TV screen.

Flash frowned at Felica. "Just exactly how long have you known?"

Felica shrugged. "Couple of days. Peter didn't know until just then."

Harry grinned slightly. "I guess she's already getting morning sickness, then. She looked a little green to me."

Flash laughed. "No wonder she bolted like that. Poor girl's probably propped up beside the toilet as we speak."

Harry shook his head. "I wonder if Aunt May knows... "

-------------------------

May Parker was sitting in her living room, looking a bit stressed. She rubbed her eyes and drank some more coffee. She wasn't sure how to go about this. But she vowed not to lose her temper.

Suddenly there was a knock at the door. "Come in."

Peter entered, looking very pale and nervous. Large dark circles were visible under his eyes, and he hesitated as he entered the living room. He stood against the wall and waited for his aunt to speak.

May looked up. She stared at Peter thoughtfully for a moment, then put down the newspaper she was reading. She had a calm expression on her face, which meant that if she knew everything.....inside she was fuming, and she just didn't show it. "Is it true?"

Peter shuffled his feet a bit before answering. "Well... um... yeah."

She simply shook her head. "You've disappointed me, Peter."

"But..."

Her expression grew more stern. "How could you let this happen?"

He started to protest. "But Aunt May..! It wasn't..."

May shushed him....and continued. "You'll just have to try harder next time."

That statement confused the hell out of Peter. "WHAT?

May narrowed her eyes at Peter. "If you don't do very well on your next test you'll fail. I expect to see you pull your grade back up."

A dawning realization spread on Peter's face, and he nodded. "Ohhh... right, of course, Aunt May. I'm sorry. I'll make sure I do exceptionally well on my next test..."

May nodded approvingly, and gave a warm smile. "Failing a test isn't the end of the world. But you've been under a lot of stress and it's showing in your grades. Maybe you should calm down, take a break. What do you have left?"

Peter frowned in thought. "Um... physics, I think. They keep putting the test day off."

"Then you'll have to make sacrifices and just study more."

"Okay... I promise I'll do better, Aunt May."

She grinned. "Oh, alright. You'll come over this weekend?" Peter nodded. "Okay, I'll see you then, dear." She watched as he closed the door behind him and smiled. It hadn't gone very badly at all. In the back of her mind, however, May had the impression that her nephew had been keeping something from her. She shrugged, and continued reading her newspaper.

-----------------------

About twenty minutes later, Peter returned to the apartment and sagged against the door. He let out a sigh of relief. Then he looked up and saw his friends staring at him. Peter barely managed to stifle a moan.

Flash crossed his arms, narrowing his eyes at Peter. "So she doesn't know after all."

Felica frowned and looked up at Flash. "What makes you say that?"

He gave a smirk. "Because egghead's still breathing."

Peter groaned. "I take it you heard already. I'd appreciate it if you kept this quiet, ok?"

"You know, Aunt May's going to find out eventually. Don't you think she should hear it from you, and not some gossiping neighbor?" Harry reasoned.

Peter shook his head. "I'm not ready. Not yet. Besides, how are they going to find out? I mean, it's not like you can tell just by looking."

Harry stopped for a second and thought of something. He turned to Felica. "Felica, how did you know?"

"She told me."

All three men gaped at her. Peter looked as though he were about to have a conniption.

Felica bit her lip in worry. "Uh-oh..."

"Don't take this the wrong way, Felica, but... WHY THE HELL DID SHE TELL YOU?!"

She winced. "Because she wasn't sure how to tell you?"

Harry nodded. "I'm beginning to see why."

"And what is that supposed to mean?" Peter growled suddenly.

Felica and Harry exchanged glances. No one said anything for a while. Then:

"Well... it seems to me, at least, that you are having anger management issues," Felica started off.

Peter narrowed his blue eyes at her in irritation. "What?"

Felica backed off, feeling a bit intimidated by Peter's....mood swings. ": ......well--"

Harry took over. "You're always angry. You get mad over the silliest things. You-"

Peter snarled at his roommate. "That's not true!"

"See?"

Peter sighed in resignation. "Ok, so maybe I've been a little... edgy lately. But that doesn't mean anything! And I don't have to time to deal with my temper right now, I have to deal with this stupid pre... pre-he..." he stammered.

Felica rolled her eyes. "Geez! Just say it already! What, is there some unwritten rule about not saying pregnancy??"

Harry scowled again. "Don't start!" He smacked Felica's arm.

"Ow! Ow! Well, geez. I mean, really. Am I the only one here who can actually say pregnant?"

"SHUT UP ABOUT IT ALREADY!... Pregnant pregnant pregnant pregnant pregnant PREGNANT! There! Are you happy? I said it!" Peter grumbled.

Harry nodded. "Ok, fine. But seriously, you got MJ p - pregnant, so what are you going to do about it?"

Peter paused and thought for a a few moments. "I don't know."

Harry threw his hands up in exasperation. "Well, that's just great. You ruined the poor girl's life and you don't know what you're going to do!"

"Um, we've established this," Flash muttered.

"Seriously, guys. I don't see what business this is of yours anyways. This is between me and MJ."

Felica gave a worried frown. "This isn't going to be secret forever. In a couple months..."

"I know already! Just... look, I'd appreciate it if you shut up about this already, alright?" Peter let out an exhaustive sigh. "Look. I'm going into my room. I've got some thinking to do. You breathe a word about this to anyone and I'll kill you. Okay?" He slammed the door to his room, and everyone stared for a moment.

Harry broke the silence. "Heh...and he says I have issues...." he snorted.

----------------------
((Later))

MJ waltzed into Harry's apartment to find the gang watching TV. She noticed a sticker on the side of the TV that said "Property of Marian Welborn" and snickered. Everyone glanced up from the Snow Show and quickly looked away.

MJ frowned. "What?"

She was met by a chorus of "Nothing."

Clearly irritated, she crossed her arms. "What're the funny looks for then?" A pause. "You know. Damn."

"Yeah, Felica told us," Harry blurted.

MJ glared at Felica. The white-haired girl cringed and tried to look innocent. MJ more or less stood there. Uncomfortable silence followed. "So..." MJ trailed off.

"Oh boy! the Snow Show!" Felica feebly attempted to change the subject.

"Peter, can I talk to you?"

Peter looked at his friends, saw no sign of them leaping to his aid, and sighed. "Okay."

As they left, Flash, Harry and Felica looked at each other apprehensively. Harry winced. "This is gonna be..."

"Bad?" Felica answered.

No one said anything for several minutes, until a knock at the door broke everyone out of their thoughts.

It was Marian. She looked around the apartment and frowned in puzzlement. "Have any of you seen my TV? It seems to have vanished a while ago. I thought maybe Peter borrowed it."

Harry squirmed in his chair. "Um... no...?"

Felica stood in front of the sticker on the TV, pretending to adjust the ridiculously outdated rabbit ears.

Marian shrugged. "Oh, ok then..."

"We'll keep an eye out for it though!" Flash called out.

"Thanks."

---------------------

MJ and Peter walked down the hall, not saying much. Peter paused in front of the elevator and shuddered.

MJ frowned. "What?"

Peter just pointed at the elevator doors. "It just gives me the creeps. I get bad vibes from it."

She laughed. "It's just an elevator! You're just being silly!"

"Easy for you to say. This from the same girl who was squirming over...pigs."

She furrowed her brows in irritation. "Hey! They were scary looking, alright?! But you..." she started snickering. "Well, let's see this elevator then," she said out of curiosity, and reached for the call button.....

Peter started to panic."NO!"

"Please...???" MJ was getting whiny again.

"NO!"

She gave him the listen-to-me-now-or-no-more-EVER glare and he winced. "Please don't make me..." he started whining now.

MJ narrowed her green eyes at him. "We're going."

"But... "

She pushed the call button.

"But!"

"It's just an elevator...it's perfectly safe!"

"But!!!"

The doors opened. Peter tried to grab onto the wall, but MJ grabbed his shirt and started dragging him towards the elevator.

"Tiger...we are going to talk. In the elevator. Do you understand?" She said slowly.

"Chhhhhkkk..." He was being choked by his shirt collar. Apparently what they said about pregnant women was true. They tended to be scary at times.

MJ smiled satisfactorily. "Good. All right then." She grabbed his hand and led him into the elevator like a cow being led to the slaughter.

-----------------

Meanwhile, Felica, Flash and Harry were alone with a non-functioning TV. The sound of thunder outside blended in with the static noise from the Snow Show.....

...and they were out of beer. Not a good thing.

"Thanks for covering for me," Harry nudged Felica with an elbow.

She gave a little wave. "Eh, no problem. Don't you think she's gonna eventually find out it was you that took her TV?"

Harry shrugged indifferently. "Well if she hadn't left her apartment unlocked..."

"Hey, what happened to the one I gave you for Christmas anyways?" Felica frowned.

Harry tried not to wince...."Um... it had... an... accident. Unfortunate. Still looking for the culprit." The accident was in the form of a pumpkin bomb he was tinkering with.....

Felica looked at Harry suspiciously.

"What? It did."

Felica shrugged, and flipped through the channels. After several cycles through the channels, she grumbled, got up and kicked the TV.

"AY! That's Mar-uh... I mean... my TV! What are you doing?" Harry cried.

"This is so weak. Not even the Snow Show is coming in any more..." Flash mumbled from his seat.

"WHAT????" Harry sat in front of the TV and stared, horrified.

Felica snorted in disgust. "I think it's time we talked to Mr. Osborn about the cable. This is getting ridiculous."

Harry ran over to the TV and started banging on it. "Work, you piece of crap! Wooorkkk!!!" He did everything, much to the others' amusement. He screamed at it, he jumped up and down, he smacked it. It was all to no avail, however, as the TV remained lifeless.

"Keep it up, Harry! Your little performance is better than anything that's on that piece of shit," Flash snickered.

Harry gave Flash one of his say-that-again-and-I'll-rip-your-heart-out glares. Flash just laughed at him.

Felica giggled. "Calm down, Harry. Just go report it to your dad and he'll get a repairman in here right away."

Harry froze. "That means I have to take the..." *cue dramatic music* "....elevator."

Felica shrugged. "Unless you want to walk."

Harry moaned, wrinkling his brow in worry. "I don't know what's worse, the very idea of walking across floor 13, or taking the elevator. And frankly, I think I'd rather walk across floor 13. At least then my death would be quick and painless."

"Nice knowing you, Osborn," Flash gave a little smirk.

Harry growled, grabbing both of them by their shirts. "Don't think you two are getting out of this! You're coming with me!!!" He picked up his dad's trident on the way out....

...he figured he'd need the protection once he made his complaint to Norman. O_o

-------------------

Peter and MJ turned towards the commotion in the hall.

Flash grumbled. "Dammit, if you wanna commit suicide, that's fine, but why do we have to go?"

Harry snarled at the couple. "Stop complaining already! Just get in the damn elevator!"

Felica pouted. "But..."

"SHUT UP! GET IN THE ELEVATOR BEFORE I KICK YOUR ASS!!"

Down the hallway, MJ smirked. "They're at it again," she commented to Peter.

"It's the Elevator of Doom! Why? Why do this?" Felica whimpered as the trio met up with Peter and MJ.

Flash crossed his arms, frowning at Harry. "I still don't see why we have to go die with you."

Harry pointed at both of them and scowled. "Shut the hell up. I don't need to think about death. Just focus on the TV ..."

MJ stared at Harry for a moment, then raised an eyebrow. "What's with the....spear?"

Harry gripped the trident tighter. "Uh...protection. I'm gonna go complain about the cable."

MJ's eyes widened in understanding. "O....kay. Well...what floor can I get for you?"

"Fourteen."

The Gang stood outside the elevator. MJ stared at them. They stared right back.

Peter shifted his stance. "Um... give us a minute."

Harry shakes his head furiously. "No way. No fucking way. I can't do it!"

Felica growled. "Harry Osborn, you dragged us all the way over here, you're damn well going to do this!" She shoved him into the elevator.

He yelped and grabbed her arm, dragging her in with him. MJ hit the button for the fourteenth floor. The doors started to close when a familiar voice cried:

"Hold the door!"

Peter, seeing everyone distracted, tried to bolt out, but ended up being wedged in between the doors. "Wmmfle..."

It was Marian. She flashed a smile at Peter. "Oh, thanks hon." Marian pushed open the doors, and Peter fell back into the elevator, moaning in pain. Marian stepped into the elevator after him, and the doors closed.

MJ smiled sweetly. "What floor can I get for you?"

"Fourteen," Marian adjusted her eyeglasses.

Everyone stared at Marian.

She blinked, trying to look innocent. It didn't work. "What? I have to talk with Mr. Osborn. And what are you guys up to?"

"Death by elevator," Harry mumbled.

The elevator stopped at the third floor. Three girls got on, holding cups of coffee and cigarettes.

A girl with purple hair scowled at her friend, and took a drag on her cig. "Dammit, Tracy, why do we always have to take the elevator? Why can't we just walk for once?"

Tracy pouted. "Because I like the elevator!"

The third girl in the group (Ami) snorted derisively. "It's too early in the morning to walk, Geri."

The Gang stared at them. They stared back.

Tracy smirked at her friend. "I think the guy with the spear likes you, Ami."

The Gang stared at them for a minute more. Peter muttered under his breath.

The elevator stopped again, and the doors opened once more. This time two girls stepped on: one blonde, one brunette. They were carrying math textbooks and having a mathematical discussion.

"That one was so hard to figure out. Did you get it, Jen?"

"Nope....I had trouble graphing it. It kept coming out wrong."

"Heh...I transposed my numbers! Ugh....so did you get the delta-epsilon proof for 5.12?"

"How'd I get the wha??... ugh, don't ask. I think I got that one wrong, too."

The Gang stared....again. The two girls looked at each other, looked at the three other girls, looked at the Gang, looked at each other again, then resumed babbling about math.

Peter bit his lip and clung to MJ. "What if the elevator can't hold this many?!"

Felica thwaped him on the head. "Stupid! ... the certificate there says it can hold 15 people!"

Harry grimaced. "When it was new, that is..."

The elevator started to slowly rock back and forth inside the shaft. Loud groaning, creaking and straining noises could be heard all around them.

MJ groaned. "Oh...this is not good."

The elevator creaked, shuddered, and made an ominous cracking sound. As the elevator hit the 13th floor, the elevator tilted a little bit and the top part caught on an outcropping on the side. The lower part, now similarly tilted, caught on an opposite outcropping and the elevator stopped.

Peter sighed. "Oh, crud..."

TBC....

Author's Note: Eh, it was silly and dumb, I know.... and no, the recent event I was inspired by was not the pregnancy bit! LOL! I got stuck in an elevator recently....but I did find out one of my friends is going to be a mom, so I thought it'd be funny to include it here......^_^ I had the same reaction as Flash did. LOL!

btw, I thought that most elevators skipped #13 when numbering floors. I can't remember, but I wrote this in purely for fictional purposes. lol

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