. Summary: Her choice changed everything, EVERYTHING! (Remember the season 4 promos when they played Madonna and had a lot of sad faces, yeah that's what I mean) What if one night did the trick? If you don't get my promo like summary let me elaborate, it's mid-season 4 minus all the P/J goo. Near the end of junior year Dawson and Joey get back together and then break up and I think the rest is pretty self-explanatory.  Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Epilogue

Leaning against the wooden post of the dock, Pacey rested his head on her shoulder as he snaked his arms around her waist. It was now July, and the fourth of July festivities had only recently been cleared out of the small town, though every few nights the left over fireworks would fill the night sky. Joey dangled her feet over the edge allowing them to flow freely in the salty wind that grazed just above the harbor. 

After Pacey had cleared out the beach house for the first time shareowner they hadn't had a time or place to be alone. While at the B&B Joey always felt obligated to help with the guests and while at Doug's, Pacey always felt obligated to stay away from whatever may have occurred in his brother's bed. 

Smoothing his hands over her swollen stomach he couldn't help but smile. He missed these moments, when he could just sit with the woman he loved, the child he would adore, and not a care in the world. Patting her abdomen in a melodic beat he crooked his chin to her ear. "Come they told me par-um-pa-pum-pum," he cooed in a soft breathy whisper. "A new born King to see par-um-pa-pum-pum." 

"Pacey," Joey giggled, "I'm sorry but your song simply isn't festive for this time of the year, if you haven't noticed there's no sign of snow and the heat is enough to fry an egg." 

"Obviously you've never heard of Christmas in July, Josephine. You know it's the half way point when you start writing up Christmas lists," he argued. 

"That would be June 25 actually, Einstein." 

Pursing his lips he nodded, "Alright, a song more appropriate for this time of year." 

"How about Just Shut Up by Joey Potter?" 

Scrunching his nose he shook it against her ear, "Never heard of it." Pausing he started a soft gentle drum roll, "Oh, Yankee Doodle went to town riding on a pony-."

A new batch of giggles hit her as she squirmed in his grasp only leading to him tightening it as he continued to sing in her ear. "Pacey, stop, Pacey!" 

Nuzzling his nose in the crook of her neck he dropped his voice to his low husky drawl, "You know you love it." 

"You know you're delusional," she countered tilting her neck so she could glance at him from over her shoulder. He simply smiled at her, his eyes bright happier then she had ever seen them, the blue of the water around them bringing out the light crystal of his deep orbs that tinted with a glorious glint from the sun. She could stare in those eyes for hours, she thought to herself; she could get lost in them for a lifetime. 

Repositioning herself she placed a light peck on the tip of his nose before settling back into his embrace. Dragging his lips along her jaw line he smoothed sloppy playful kisses accompanied by loud 'muh' noises that carried her brilliant smile throughout the daylight. 

"You know what I like about Pregnant Potter?" He asked his voice now deep, soft and melodic. 

"My increasing cup size?" She joked cocking her head towards him. 

"No," he replied shaking his head his nose brushing against her velvet cheek in the process. "You've got this motherly glow to you; it makes you look so responsible," he said kissing her cheek. Dropping his voice back down to a whisper he smirked, "and extremely sexy." 

Raising her brows she smiled shyly, modestly, "Oh really?" 

Running his tongue over his lips he nodded, "Yeah and the boob thing just happens to be a feet." 

"You are so vulgar," she stated melting under his warm eyes. 

"You are so cynical," he countered removing any space between their gravitating faces. 

"You are so naive." 

Rounding his hand up her stomach flicking his thumb over her nipple, "You are so aroused." 

Swatting at his hand she shook her head, "You are so delusional." 

"You are so beautiful." 

And with that they were kissing, not like any other kisses they had shared. This kiss contained something deeper an inner passion that neither of them had displayed to one another or to anybody else before. She snaked her arm around his neck pulling his face closer her other hand resting above his on her belly. 

She then jumped almost like a hiccup, "Did you feel that?" She asked her face now dancing with excitement as she smoothed his hand over the rounded surface of her abdomen. 

"Feel what?" 

"It kicked," she said continuing to move his hand over her trying to find the right position, "The baby it kicked." 

His face lit up as he felt the movement underneath his fingertips. The little life growing inside of her all the more real. 

~*~

Dawson walked out of the local grocers cradling a large paper bag as he shook the summer breeze from his long blonde hair. Heading out to the long walkway he saw them huddled in their own little world on the dock. "It hurts, doesn't it?" He turned his head to see Jen feasting on an ice cream as she stepped up next to him. 

"Why would it?" Dawson asked unconvincingly, his eyes once again lingering on the couple. 

"To see her so happy with somebody else," Jen stated her gaze falling on Dawson's. 

"She had to move on eventually I guess," he shrugged still not making his words believable. 

"But not with your best friend," Dawson bit back his lip his frustration finally seeping through his features, "he loves her." 

"That's what makes it even worse." 

~*~

Slipping into her room she identified the unmistakable lump as Pacey, sprawled out across her covers his shoes still on his feet. She eased herself onto the edge of the bed gingerly removing his work boots and socks. 

She pulled herself up to the head of the bed, her movements becoming more and more of a challenge as the days progressed. His innocence was uncanny as he nuzzled his nose into her pillow, his breath easy and content as he inhaled her scent. The moonlight grazed across his smooth skin and she couldn't resist the urge to run her fingers along his features. His strong jawbone that highlighted his manly facade was countered by his puffy cheeks around his lips that only reminded her how young they still were. 

His broad chest had gained new contour and muscle from his summer work and she concluded that he had just gotten back from his janitor job down at the plaza. In moments like these she couldn't deny how much she loved him. When she realized how hard he was working to be with her, to make her happy. When they were alone at night and she could just lay there and watch him sleep she knew she loved him. 

It was hard to decide when she started to love him, he was always the type of person that she could see herself falling for and she covered that with bantering bravado. It was hard to look at somebody else that wasn't Dawson that way, especially when fate and destiny were telling her that Dawson was the only one. But with Pacey it wasn't the cosmos telling her to love him; it was her heart, her soul. 

"Where were you," he asked groggily as she quickly drew her hand away. 

Realizing that he was her husband and she had touched him many times before in many different ways she ran her fingers through his sloppy hair, "I went out to dinner with Dawson; he wanted to make sure I was eating right." 

He chewed on his inner lip his blurry eyes still trying to focus on her in the dim light, "Oh," his heart flinched, "he really doesn't have to baby sit you." 

"It's nice to still spend time with him sometimes," brushing the hair off his forehead she placed a light kiss. "Too tired to make it all the way to your couch at Doug's?" 

"Nah," he said his voice still husky with sleep, "I just prefer lying in bed with you on my arm." 

"Definitely getting to schmoopy there Witter." She said snuggling into the crook of his arm. 

~*~

She had called him in tears about an hour earlier and he had feared the worst. She started babbling about how the world hated her and that she couldn't do anything right because she would just end up right back here no matter what she did. He had tried to comfort her when she finally told him that she was out of pickles and really wanted some ice cream. 

Swinging the plastic bag over his shoulder he broke through the door, "Okay I got your craving of the moment, anything else before I go?" 

Resting on the couch she dove her hand into the jar of pickles she was eating, "Oh don't worry Dawson brought some over." 

Puckering his lips he rose his brows, "He did, did he?" She nodded as she devoured another slimy pickle, "Why would he do that when I was running around town searching for pistachio ice cream and pickles for my wife?" 

"Because he called to ask if I needed anything," she answered not understanding the problem. 

"But didn't I say I was going to take care of it?" 

"What's the big deal Pace, so we have two jars of pickles it's not like I won't eat them." 

"I don't know, Jo," he said his voice deepening slightly as he slammed the plastic back on the counter. "Maybe it's the fact that I'm working my ass off in three fucking jobs so we can survive and I can support us while you're sitting around letting Dawson wait on you hand and foot," his eyes darkened as he paced across the room. 

"Calm down," she cried climbing off the couch, "What's your problem?" 

"Don't you understand?" He blurted out, "Dawson is the reason for all my insecurities in life. Do you know what it's like growing up being told how perfect your friend is and how worthless you are? All my life Dawson's always expressed how superior he is to me and how I'll never be worth the same things that he is. He's made it clear to both of us that I'm ruining your life and every time he does you a little favor its more and more proof how inadequate I really am." He was yelling now his furry and passion on the subject evident. 

"He's my friend! All he wants to do is help us Pacey, not rub in our problems!" Joey replied in annoyance, her eyes leering through slit lids. "I'm not going to stop talking to him because you're jealous!" 

"I don't even know why I'm doing this anymore!" He sneered his fists clenching by his sides, "I don't know why I bother when you'll just leave me in two years anyway." Turning to the door he swung it open dramatically. 

"Fuck you Pacey!" She called against his back. 

He turned a bitter smirk across his face, "Isn't that what got us here in the first place?" He questioned before disappearing through the door. 

~*~

The air around her was only filled with the soft rustling of the leaves and the chirping of the crickets as she waddled her way down the dock. She missed the days that she could run, the days that the wind would rush through her hair as she took off across Dawson's lawn flying up the ladder and spending the better parts of her childhood. 

She was stupid to deny fate, to betray her soul mate; she didn't need Pacey anymore because he didn't care, not like Dawson did at least. 

Her hand attached to the door like a magnet as the rasping sound of the clanking wood shook her out of the trance she was in. Moments latter Dawson was in front of her helping her through the door when she realized she couldn't move her feet that her knees wouldn't quite lock and that her stomach felt like it was twisting. She healed over slightly her hands shaking as her eyes began to flood blurring her vision. Taking a few deep breaths the pain subsided as she sank onto his couch. 

"What's wrong?" His voice rang through her ears and for a moment she forgot where she was and what she was doing there. 

"Pacey left," she nodded a few times her voice suddenly calm, "So I guess you can say I told you so anytime now." 

"Suddenly I wish he had proved me wrong," Dawson huffed smoothing his hands along her legs in an attempt to sooth her. They sat there staring at the empty fireplace a lightening bug catching their attention in the corner of their eyes every few moments. "Can I get you something?" 

She shook her head wiping at her clammy eyes trying to dry away all of her fallen tears only spreading the moisture with her damp hands. She felt her heart breaking as she realized Pacey was gone, that he was the type of person who could walk out a door and disappear forever, who could run away from life at the droop of a hat. She knew that because she was that kind of person too. 

"No," she finally whimpered. Not unless he could stop the swelling in her ankles, the shooting pains in her back, the reappearing clenching feeling in her abdomen, or the fact that Pacey was gone. 

He helped her up allowing her to fall into his arms as she continued to shake uneasily in his embrace. Looking down over her shoulder she fell harder against him shrieking, "Oh God Jo you're bleeding." 

~*~

Letting out another breath of air he walked back into the B&B still skipping through words to add into his apology of all apologies. The house was empty, all the guests down at the beach for a wedding, Bessie and Joey mysteriously missing. "Jo?" He called out glancing into her bedroom. "Joey?" he repeated looking though all the open doors ending at the bathroom. 

Sinking down to his knees he fell back against the cool tile burying his head in his hands. The sudden fear swept over him, the fear that she would leave him and never look back. That she would run to Dawson's arms and denounce any feelings she could have ever had for him. Letting his head fall back it made contact with the plush towels on the rack behind him. His hot breath escaped his lips as he sighed in frustration. 

He slid his hands along the radiator that ran along the length of the floor, the cool metal soothing against his callus clad fingers. Brushing over a rough cardboard feeling material he froze twiddling the piece between his fingers before retracting it from the crease of the radiator. 

To a long and happy marriage.

The print of the company had faded from the repeated water vapor that had filled the small quarters. The golden print of the logo was slightly smeared and the material of the cigar band was now worn and rough. 

He let out a bitter laugh as he continued to fiddle with the ring, the symbol for his and Joey's relationship. No matter how many times they tried to run away from it, to deny it, they needed each other and the bond they had formed wouldn't go away. 

"Oh my God!" Bessie shrieked from what had to be the kitchen. He heard her feet scamper up and down the hall as he climbed onto his feet peeking out the door. 

"What's wrong?" He asked stepping in front of her stopping her with his hands. 

"Joey she's in labor," Bessie panicked. 

"She can't be she's only 23 weeks!" Pacey said as calmly as possible swallowing the lump in his throat. 

"Pacey, it's not looking very good," she said suddenly gaining her composure knowing that she needed to be the comforting shoulder. "If they don't stop the contractions before her water breaks…" she trailed off. 

"The baby won't survive," he finished. 

~*~

"Pacey, I need Pacey," she mumbled repeatedly. 

Dawson helped Joey into the hospital the nurse immediately finding a wheel chair for her frail body. "What's wrong with her?" She asked. 

"She's started bleeding about ten minutes ago, she's a little over 5 months and I think she's been having contractions." Dawson stuttered out trying to remember all the details. 

"Alright, we'll get her taken care of, who is she exactly?" 

"Joey," he shook his head, "Josephine Potter." 

Joey clenched onto the armrests of the wheelchair as sweat trickled down her forehead pasting her long brown hair against her face, "It's Witter," she yelled through the pain. 

~*~

Pacey raced through the long corridors dodging carts and doctors as he headed towards delivery. He hadn't been very kind to the receptionists and nurses as he tried to gain the information to find her, but Bessie was on his heels apologizing for all the crude insults he had dispensed. 

Stopping short he nearly ran into a doctor as he exited a room. 

"Why isn't it crying?" He heard echoing through the halls. 

"I'm looking for Joey Potter," he called out. 

The man bit back his lip, "You must be the father," his voice was somber but rehearsed. "You're wife went into premature labor, usually there's a drug to dispense that will subdue the contractions but the amniotic sac was already broken." 

Pacey shook his head a few times trying to hide his breaking heart, "She had the baby didn't she?" 

"She must have been in labor longer then she thought she was. Fifty percent of all premature births have no identifiable explanations." He paused for a moment, "Our neonatal care isn't the most high tech but it's definitely going to need to go on life support seeing as she wasn't that far along. There's a fifty/fifty chance here seeing as your son is a little less than two pounds, but it's not looking good, I'm sorry Mister Witter." 

Pacey slid into her room rushing to her side cradling her hand as she continued to breathe heavily. Dawson stepped back as he watched how gentle he was with her, "Pacey," she breathed weakly grasping his hand. "I'm so sorry." 

"It's okay, it's okay," he repeated smoothing his hand over her clammy forehead. 

"I lost the baby, Pacey, he's gone." 

"Shh, shh, don't give up hope," he whispered, "We have to think of a name for our little boy." 

"Pacey, he's gone," she repeated huskily her eyes shadowed by a gloss of tears. 

"He's got to have a name Jo," he explained, "I've always liked the name Ethan." His voice broke as realization drained over him as well, "How do you like the name Ethan?" 

She nodded, "Ethan James Witter sounds nice." 

He smoothed his hand over her cheek the other one still gripping tightly on hers, "That's perfect." He bit his lower lip closing his eyes tightly as he tried to stay strong, "I guess we'll have to go clothes shopping earlier then we had expected." His voice broke again as he collapsed against her shoulder his tears overcoming him. 

She wrapped her free arm around his neck allowing him to burrow his face into her chest, "I'm so sorry Pace." 

Dawson stood from the chair in the corner crossing the small room he bumped into the nurse. She simply shook her head and Dawson led her out of the room with him leaving Joey and Pacey alone to their grief. 

"I understand if you don't want to be married to me anymore," Joey mumbled. 

He lifted his head his eyes misty and distorted, "What why would I want that?" 

"Because I lost our baby Pacey, I wasn't strong enough and I couldn't save him." 

"It is not your fault Jo; it was not your fault." 

Her voice cracked as she reached out cupping his face, "But you only married me for the baby." 

He climbed up on the bed next to her wrapping her protectively in his arms, "I'm not going to leave." She pressed her body flush against his finally finding comfort as her tears bleed through his shirt. 

~*~

He felt lost in the stale hospital room, his whole life gone. The woman that he loved didn't want him anymore, the child that he would adore was gone, and all the cares in his world came crashing against him hard. He felt empty inside and he was afraid that this was it, what life had wanted him to be, alone. 

His hand hovered over her afraid to touch her, that he would break her further then he already had. She clenched onto his shirt tight mumbling something incoherent every so often and soaking him with a new batch of tears. His hand hovered over her stomach, still slightly swollen but now it was empty. The tie between them was gone; severed through his own stupidity. 

It was then he realized everything he had just missed. His son's first cries, his first smile, the first time he would clamp his small fist around his index finger. He had missed watching him sleep at night stirring slightly before lulling back to sleep. He had missed his first steps, his first words, which he was sure would be 'momma'. He had missed driving him off to kindergarten for the first time embracing Joey as she cried that her little baby was growing up. He had missed teaching his little boy how to play baseball and taking him off to Fenway for the first time. In the blink of an eye his son's life was over, it had ended before it began. In the blink of an eye he had lost his son, his wife, his entire family was gone. 

"She loves you, you know," jumping out of his sorrows Pacey slowly raised his head the rims of his eyes visibly a bloody red and puffy from escaped tears even in the dim light. Focusing his attention on the door it took him a moment to identify the dark figure illuminated from the light outside the doorframe. "Almost as much as you love her," Dawson forced out, the words the hardest he had ever spoken. 

Pacey opened his mouth not sure of what words he was expected to speak, not sure if his quick wit could cover this situation. All that was released was a painful gasp of air as his tired eyes focused on his former best friend in disbelief. "Take care of her Pacey." 

~*~

"Pace, Pacey?" She mumbled groggily as she opened her eyes. 

"Don't worry I'm right here," he whispered stroking her clammy hair. "Shhhh, shh, just go back to sleep." 

Looking up at him with her glossy eyes she snuggled back into his chest, the small hospital bed leaving little room as a double. "About what I said, I completely understand if you want to end this." 

Reaching into his pocket he pulled out the rough cigar band straightening it out as he tried to make it regain its form. "I found this a few hours ago, remember it?" He whispered softly sliding it onto her ring finger resting it above the golden band. 

"Yeah," she nodded absently focusing on the colorful cardboard ring, the intricate pattern of the golden seal mesmerizing. "I can't believe you found it." Joey worked her way up into a sitting position grimacing slightly at the remaining pain. 

"I want to be married to you Jo, and I know this isn't the most conventional engagement ring or the most appropriate moment in our lives for me to be popping such a question seeing as we've been married for over a month now, but since when were we living the storybook romance?" He joked lightly but the emotion in his eyes not faltering. 

"I would like that," she nodded. 

"But I don't want to be married to you through obligation Joey; I want you to love me." 

"I do Pacey, I love you so much but I didn't think that you loved me," she wept entwining her fingers with his. 

He grunted biting back the threatening smile, "Diamonds and gold, soggy cigar rings, they're all just metaphors in this abstract world in which nobodies willing to admit how they feel! And when you peel away all the symbolism and hidden meanings behind them all that's left is how in love with you I am, Potter." 

"Would you stop calling me that?" She murmured her voice still heavy with tears. His brows furrowed as she caressed his hand still in hers, "It's Witter now."