Bored At Work 5
Sci-Speak 101
by Jinx

Summary: Jack's translations of Daniel and Carter

Rated: G

Notes: Bored at work still. What's new?

Warnings: Total PWP, so if you don't like those stories, go away. No sex, either! Oh no!!!!

All right. So it's a well-known fact that I'm not the brightest bulb in the factory. I mean, sure, I went to college. It was kinda a requirement for the air force. Well, not necessarily a requirement per se, but I did my duty and went off to OTS and the rest, they say, is history.

Somehow I made my way to colonel and with that came the oh-so-joyous station to the SGC; that would be Stargate Command for those not in the know. Anyway, with that came the oh-so-joyous command of SG-1. (Yeah, I'm sure you can figure out what that means.) Anyway... with that came one Dr. Daniel Jackson and Major-Doctor Samantha Carter: SG-1's resident linguist and astrophysicist respectively. And, I'm sure we can all figure out what that meant... No? Well, I'll tell you...

Listening to those two talk is like listening to your high school science teacher explain the textbook you read the night before. Heaven forbid they explain anything in words that the normal, layman, unlearned, uneducated, whatever can understand. No, no. They have what I call 'Sci-speak'. And for the life of me, I can't understand why? It's so much easier to just say something like, "I think" instead of rattling off a bunch of words, "It is believed that..." "I think"... how easy is that, I ask you?!

Well, because of all this, I carry this little notebook around with me with 'Daniel-translation' and 'Carter translation'. What's so funny is that Daniel gets all bent outta shape when I pull it out and start flippin' through the pages. He knows I'm teasing, but you know Daniel... But, then again, it's worked really well, too. Whenever I take the notebook out, Daniel and Carter know to tone it down a bit and start speaking English.

To give you an example of what I've translated already, when Carter says, "A statistically-oriented projection of the significance of these findings..." I know she is really saying, "A wild guess." When Daniel says in our mission briefings, "A careful analysis of obtainable data..." he means that "three pages of notes were obliterated when" he "knocked over a cup of coffee."

It's rather very interesting how much I've learned from this 'sci-speak'. Though I doubt I will ever understand it all. Between Carter and Daniel I'll have hundreds of little notebooks littering my pack before it's all done.

Oh well. They keep me on my toes! Besides, it's kinda fun. And one of these days, I'll be able to go into Hammond's office and say, "It is hoped that these missions will stimulate further investigation in the various fields..." Translation: I quit.

Finis