wed., sept. 26,2001 12:23am(EDT).
el barrio/dah hood,connecticut,usa.

just what insanity is this crazy *white* dude
gonna type for his diary-starved readers?*chuckles*

dunno. all the ideas going thru this mind are *boring*! *laughs*

or not suitable for general audiences . hee heehee

down to brass tacks.*hrumph!*

we all know it's been just over two weeks
since the madness,terror,and horror
was unleashed on the u.s. of a.*sigh*

we,the citizens of cyberspace try to carry on.
folks are *starved* for email
that has to do with *anything*
*except* 09/11/01.

prayer and friendship forwards are surfacing again.
which is a *very* hopeful sign. YES!!!

i was getting kinda teary-eyed and grumpy.
wondering what i was going to write.

obsessing over my counter numbers.
my rankings in the gadzillion topsites contests.

my dad says do *NOT* put a counter on this page.
but i've never been very good at following advice.
so maybe one of those ugly angelfire default counters will appear.

the 24 million dollar question is:
who cares?

why do i keep making webpages?
about *me*?
and my moods and memories?

the answer i come up with is:
because it matters.
because *i* matter.

i matter.

this crazy white dude
with stinky armpits
who calls himself "big bear".

i matter.
there's a reason for my existence.
i may even be on a *path*.
"my path is different from plath's.
i took digel rather than turn on the gas."

to quote myself.

those "ideations":
suicidal and homicidal
still haunt me from time to time.

who asked the monsters to come in the room???

would you kindly leave NOW!!!!

exit monsters.

suddenly this diary's become a surrealist play.

how very french of me.
there's boudinot blood in this bear.
always fighting with the "bloody english"
and the swedes.
and those texans!

god bless cyberspace.

god bless america!