The Librarian's Tale

        There once was a woman who worked at the town library; a mean old woman who lived on the hill in a creaky old mansion. She wore thick red glasses, had slightly graying hair and a round little face. This little old lady was not very friendly to children. In fact, a couple of strange instances in which young children had been injured had occurred at the library. Of course the first suspect was the strict library worker, but, strangely, no evidence could be found to justify and arrest, so charges were not even considered. "Besides, why would a little old lady hurt children?" That’s what they all said—all the parents anyway. But the kids knew different. The kids who dealt with her ever-changing mood and unpredictable mood swings knew that she was guilty of all the strange injuries. But nobody dared to step forward, because all those with big mouths had a strange history of joining the injured list, and for those special VIPs, they joined the missing list...

        "I know it’s her doing it, Mom!" a high pitched voice said.

        "Tommy, we’ve talked about this!" an adult’s voice replied.

        "But, but..."

        "Enough! I’ve heard enough. Just apologize to this nice lady, and we’ll talk about this when we get home."

        "I'm sorry, Miss Hammermill," the boy said in a forced apologetic voice.

        The Librarian looked still in shock from the absurd accusation.

         "A...A...Apology accepted," she said in a shaky voice that almost sounded as if it were a question, or as if she didn't know what to say.

         The car pulled out of the short driveway that led to the old, dusty library. Just as it left, the librarian stepped away from the window, her "people person" facade left her face and her usual scowl crept back onto her face. "Snotty kids," she said, as she always did after some little brat was forced to apologize for the same old stupid things. "I’m sorry I was bad in class today," or "I’m sorry I forgot to bring my book back on time," or any of the other dumb things they had to say.

         She stepped onto the creaky old staircase and stumbled on her arthritis-ridden feet down the stairs to the storage closet. She pulled out a jingling key chain from her pocket and picked out one of the many keys. Opening the door slowly, she walked into the dark room, searching for the light on the ceiling. Finally she found the light, and she turned it on, exposing three bookshelves. She searched for the familiar book. "Ahh," she said, "Here it is."

         It was A Tale Of Two Cities. She pulled on the book and a small opening appeared on the floor next to her. She stepped carefully into the hole and flicked on the little light switch, exposing four dog crates, with children, aged 7-15 in them. "Well, well, well," she said. "Nice to see all of you again."

         "You won’t get away with this, woman," The oldest one said......

        "Hold on, hold on!" a child’s voice interrupted the storyteller. "What is A Tale of Two Cities?"

         "Don't interrupt me you little brat!" the Librarian/Storyteller yelled, lifting his fist. "That was a warning, boy. Don't think I won’t hit you next time."

         "So anyway, back to the story..." He started to continue.

         "Well, actually I’d kind of like to know what it is too," another man said.

         "Fine! A Tale of Two Cities is a horrible book. Has anyone ever been forced to read that story?"

         A few listeners raised their hands.

         "Ok. Would you ever go and get that book from the library?"

         Silence.

         "That’s what I thought." He said satisfied. "Before I continue, everyone who has to go to the bathroom better go now because I don't want you getting up during my story. Ok, where was I?"

         "You’ll never get away with this!" He repeated as the woman stepped towards the food containers and water jugs.

         It was a daily ritual of hers; she would come downstairs, feed the kids, and read paragraphs from "A Tale Of Two Cities" in an attempt to drive them crazy. These kids were strong, unfortunately. She had tried everything, The Great Gatsby, Beowulf, and every other boring book ever made; nothing worked! This was her last hope at killing them without it being known it was her behind it.

         "Where was I?" she said in a scratchy voice, "Ahhhh, yes. Here it is. Ah-hem. It was the best of times it was the worst of times..."

         The car pulled into the driveway at about noon, and John (the boy from the library) had just finished getting scolded by his mother. "Go to your room young man!" She had said, "And don't come out until you have thought about what you’ve done!"

         So he trudged up the stairs pouting as much as his body would allow, and shut his door. He sat down at his computer and began searching for anything he could use to prove that he was right about the librarian. He went to Yaboo.com and typed in "Scary Librarians."

         Miraculously, twenty different sites came up with names that were very closely related; Mrs. Hammermill, Mrs. Mammermill, Mrs. Mammerhill, and Mr. Danderfill. He clicked on the first name and a web site popped up a wanted poster with a picture that very well resembled Mrs. Hammermill.

         After reviewing the information provided by the wonders of the internet John discovered that the same strange occurrences happened in twenty other towns all over the country, in small town libraries. They all started innocently enough, random paper cuts, book bruises, and eventually kids started disappearing, and some even turned up dead. But the strange part was that they could not find any evidence of struggle, poison, or any distinguishing evidence.

         So he thought to himself, "What could she do to kill these kids?" and he finally came to the conclusion that she must be driving them insane. Being as how she worked in a library, she must have used books. Well it was all up to him now, he had to stop her. So he sneaked out his bedroom window and was on his way.

         He arrived at the old, dusty, creepy library at around 8 o’clock, just in time to see a kid leaving with his mother pulling on his ear for upsetting the nice old lady.

         John stepped through the creaky doors just as Mrs. Hammermill stepped down the stairs toward the basement. Following as slowly as possible, John noticed her walking into the small room with the bookshelves. He quietly followed her into the room, until he started to notice the sound of children’s voices. Becoming nervous, he picked up the first item he could find. It was the book It, by Stephen King.

         He turned the corner to see a line of six dog cages with children in them. "It was the best of times..." Mrs. Hammermill read.

         "Ahhhh!!" they screamed, "I cant take it!"

         Sneaking "sniper-style" behind her, John slowly got behind the old lady and smacked her on the head with his mightiest blow. While she was knocked out, John let out the children, and they began to slowly file out the small trap door.

         Starting to come to, Mrs. Hammermill noticed that the kids were gone, and that she was probably going to be arrested for kidnapping. Hoping that she could still catch them, she shook herself off, and ran after the little brats as fast as her little legs would take her.

         John knew that the kids wouldn't be able to get away, on account of the fact that they had been cramped up in cages for months, stayed behind and waited for Mrs. Hammermill. He could hear her little footsteps rushing up the stairs, and as she finally turned the corner, it was the final showdown...

         There they stood; kid versus adult. Normally, this would be a one sided battle, in favor of the adult, but in this case, there was a slightly leveled playing field brought on by the age differences and the determination of the younger party.

         She made the first move, going for her ruler, which she used for hitting disobedient children. He grabbed for the closest book and threw it at her as hard as he could. She dodged the book, and ran to the side into the stacks of books.

         Realizing the possibilities for a domino effect, he pushed over the bookshelf in front of him, knocking over the whole line of shelves, crushing Mrs. Hammermill.

         Later, the police found out about everything she was doing, the families were reunited, and everyone was happy forever after that... THE END!

         "Well, that’s my story" the librarian said, getting up.

         "Wait, wait, wait!" a passenger said, "That’s the end? That wasn't a very good ending. You just sort of summed it up.

         "Well, that’s because I have to go to the bathroom!" He yelled

         He sprinted to the back of the bus to find the bathroom door locked. "Hey get out of there you little imp or I’ll give you the spanking of your life!"