Blood Soaked and Honor Bound: 101 Reasons Why...

blood soaked and honor bound: sku

A young dirty-blonde haired boy meanders across the bright and sunny campus of Ohtori Academy. His nose is buried in a small writing tablet with a rose seal on the front, and he prints with a large number two pencil. So engrossed is he in his work that he fails to notice three 2nd grade females who giggle and wave at him.
Yes, Tsuwabuki was on a mission. A mission of utmost importance (at least, that's how he saw it). A mission… to grow up.
How does one go about growing up? He'd tried stilts; he'd tried Jolly Green Giant vegetables… hell, he'd even tried spinach, but nothing seemed to work. So he continued to walk along when suddenly it hit him. He had it! The perfect, foolproof plan that would undoubtedly make him grow up. He moved his pencil to write down the idea on his paper before he forgot it, when… he tripped.
As he looked behind him, he saw a ladder in the middle of the road, laying there for no apparent reason. Before Tsuwabuki could wonder about the presence of the ladder, he heard a distant, Tarzan-like yodel. Looking up, he sees Karen, clad in naught but several strategically placed leaves. She swings from a long vine attached to the top of Akio's planetarium, and finally, as her voice reaches its crescendo, she crashes somewhere in the forest surrounding the arena.
Tsuwabuki only has time to blink before something zooms past him. A doubletake and a quick peek through his binoculars reveals it to be Becka. Wearing a grass skirt, a feather headdress, and lots of war paint, she perches and rides atop a flaming pink flamingo. She beelines in the direction whence Karen disappeared. More confused than ever, our little blonde trooper bravely decides to follow.
Several minutes later, he stands beside Becka (minus the flamingo), who stares upwards at Karen. She is hanging upside down, tangled in various gnarled vines and tree branches.
"Ka-chan, what were you doing?" questions the slightly puzzled Becka.
There is a pause, then a pathetic murmur, "… looking for a new page…"
Becka snorts, "Oh, like you're going to find a new page skydiving from Akio's planetarium. Just where was he when you were doing this?"
"Hey! I don't know where he was, and besides, I wasn't the one who came in here riding on a pink flamingo!"
Becka glowers, "It takes mad skill to successfully ride a flamingo, I'll have you know."
Karen sweatdrops and says nothing as Becka and Tsuwabuki cut her down. Becka continues, "Why were you looking for a new page anyway? What's wrong with the pages we have?"
Karen falls at Becka's feet, sniffling, "Our page has gotten out of hand! First it was the Pants! Then it was the Rabbits of Doom! And then there was… the Lord of the Dance… (which is better left unsaid…). It's just so messy! It needs… it needs…"
Suddenly Karen's eyes go wide and she climbs back up the tree Becka just helped her down from. Her voice puts in one's mind an image of Amelia, Sailor Moon, and… Martin Luther King Jr., rolled into one. It was scary.
"It needs organization! Together we can overcome this great chaos which threatens to destroy the lives of so many innocent people, crazed, insane- yes! This is what the world has come to… but no more! For today, we can bring health, order, and those little Tastykake pies, and although the heavens in their indifferent orbit choose to overlook this blatant evil, I, forsooth, cannot. In the name of Touga's bath towels, I will punish you… and… um… can somebody help me down from here?"
As Tsuwabuki and Becka recover from their collective facevaults, with mutters such as, "Gee," "Damn," "Wow," "Umm," "Err," and "Yeah…" Finally, the little blonde boy remembers the ladder he tripped over earlier and goes to fetch it. Tsuwabuki returns with the ladder, having had time to think about Karen's emotional speech, and he realizes something. That's not a bad idea! (Especially the part about those pies…)
Karen crawls down the ladder, and Becka is left blinking as Tsuwabuki offers the lady his squirely aid. Seeing as, well, both of them are two far gone to talk at this point, Tsuwabuki states, "Well, I'd like to help. I'm sure I'd be good at organizing things." He hopefully adds, "I'll learn responsibility, and maybe… it'll help me grow up…?"
Still on that motivational high, Karen slowly grins, "Oh yes… baby… you'll do very well…" Both redhead and blonde back away slowly. Karen whips out a stack of papers about three times her own height (don't ask where she kept them), and thrusts them at Tsuwabuki. Her grin can only be described as demonic. "C'mere honey… you can start with these."
Tsuwabuki ulps and begins to work.

101 Reasons Why We Love Touga
101 Reasons Why We Hate Akio
101 Reasons Why We Want to Be Utena
101 Reasons Why Juri Kicks Ass (list only)

Coming Next:
101 Reasons Why Even Juri Likes Miki

Much, much later, after Becka has fallen asleep cuddled against her flamingo, and Karen has run out of things for him to do, Tsuwabuki trots off in the direction of his dorm. Blinking, he smiles a little. If he had to continually do that sort of thing to grow up, maybe he'd better wait a few years…


A young dirty-blonde haired boy meanders across the bright and sunny campus of Ohtori Academy. His nose is buried in a small writing tablet with a rose seal on the front, and he prints with a large number two pencil. So engrossed is he in his work that he fails to notice three 2nd grade females who giggle and wave at him. Yes, Tsuwabuki was on a mission. A mission of utmost importance (at least, that's how he saw it). A mission… to grow up. How does one go about growing up? He'd tried stilts; he'd tried Jolly Green Giant vegetables… hell, he'd even tried spinach, but nothing seemed to work. So he continued to walk along when suddenly it hit him. He had it! The perfect, foolproof plan that would undoubtedly make him grow up. He moved his pencil to write down the idea on his paper before he forgot it, when… he tripped. As he looked behind him, he saw a ladder in the middle of the road, laying there for no apparent reason. Before Tsuwabuki could wonder about the presence of the ladder, he heard a distant, Tarzan-like yodel. Looking up, he sees Karen, clad in naught but several strategically placed leaves. She swings from a long vine attached to the top of Akio's planetarium, and finally, as her voice reaches its crescendo, she crashes somewhere in the forest surrounding the arena. Tsuwabuki only has time to blink before something zooms past him. A doubletake and a quick peek through his binoculars reveals it to be Becka. Wearing a grass skirt, a feather headdress, and lots of war paint, she perches and rides atop a flaming pink flamingo. She beelines in the direction whence Karen disappeared. More confused than ever, our little blonde trooper bravely decides to follow. Several minutes later, he stands beside Becka (minus the flamingo), who stares upwards at Karen. She is hanging upside down, tangled in various gnarled vines and tree branches. "Ka-chan, what were you doing?" questions the slightly puzzled Becka. There is a pause, then a pathetic murmur, "… looking for a new page…" Becka snorts, "Oh, like you're going to find a new page skydiving from Akio's planetarium. Just where was he when you were doing this?" "Hey! I don't know where he was, and besides, I wasn't the one who came in here riding on a pink flamingo!" Becka glowers, "It takes mad skill to successfully ride a flamingo, I'll have you know." Karen sweatdrops and says nothing as Becka and Tsuwabuki cut her down. Becka continues, "Why were you looking for a new page anyway? What's wrong with the pages we have?" Karen falls at Becka's feet, sniffling, "Our page has gotten out of hand! First it was the Pants! Then it was the Rabbits of Doom! And then there was… the Lord of the Dance… (which is better left unsaid…). It's just so messy! It needs… it needs…" Suddenly Karen's eyes go wide and she climbs back up the tree Becka just helped her down from. Her voice puts in one's mind an image of Amelia, Sailor Moon, and… Martin Luther King Jr., rolled into one. It was scary. "It needs organization! Together we can overcome this great chaos which threatens to destroy the lives of so many innocent people, crazed, insane- yes! This is what the world has come to… but no more! For today, we can bring health, order, and those little Tastykake pies, and although the heavens in their indifferent orbit choose to overlook this blatant evil, I, forsooth, cannot. In the name of Touga's bath towels, I will punish you… and… um… can somebody help me down from here?" As Tsuwabuki and Becka recover from their collective facevaults, with mutters such as, "Gee," "Damn," "Wow," "Umm," "Err," and "Yeah…" Finally, the little blonde boy remembers the ladder he tripped over earlier and goes to fetch it. Tsuwabuki returns with the ladder, having had time to think about Karen's emotional speech, and he realizes something. That's not a bad idea! (Especially the part about those pies…) Karen crawls down the ladder, and Becka is left blinking as Tsuwabuki offers the lady his squirely aid. Seeing as, well, both of them are two far gone to talk at this point, Tsuwabuki states, "Well, I'd like to help. I'm sure I'd be good at organizing things." He hopefully adds, "I'll learn responsibility, and maybe… it'll help me grow up…?" Still on that motivational high, Karen slowly grins, "Oh yes… baby… you'll do very well…" Both redhead and blonde back away slowly. Karen whips out a stack of papers about three times her own height (don't ask where she kept them), and thrusts them at Tsuwabuki. Her grin can only be described as demonic. "C'mere honey… you can start with these." Tsuwabuki ulps and begins to work. 101 Reasons Why We Love Touga 101 Reasons Why We Hate Akio 101 Reasons Why We Want to Be Utena 101 Reasons Why Juri Kicks Ass (list only) Coming Next: 101 Reasons Why Even Juri Likes Miki Much, much later, after Becka has fallen asleep cuddled against her flamingo, and Karen has run out of things for him to do, Tsuwabuki trots off in the direction of his dorm. Blinking, he smiles a little. If he had to continually do that sort of thing to grow up, maybe he'd better wait a few years…