Date: 5/10/00 12:19:57 PM Eastern Daylight Time

From: Kris Maxwell

To: SilvVenom@aol.com, sparrowskit@hotmail.com

Day One

Floating in the vast reaches of space, a girl decides that her life is way to dull. Though she realizes her life involves an empath, a chauvanist, a clown (not really, just his job.), a psychopath, and a thief, she wonders where she could meet more people like that. She yawns in the lounge as she hears the space toilets flush and Duo's laugh. Once again, she sees various items float by the window. He's seemed to have flushed a magazine, a gun, a chibi?! *Kris races for the space suit and out into space for her despiratly squawking and turning blue Chibi Duo named Grimmy.

Duo leaves the bathroom with a grin on his face, only to be sprawled on the floor. "I'm bored." Kris states with a frown. Trowa walks into the room. "Let's go to school."

"HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND?! SCHOOL?! THE MOST TORTUROUS PLACE ON...oh wait..." Kris's eyes narrow and her mouth turns into a grin. "Remember our last mission?"

Quatre walks in suddenly. "The Akio-car mission?"

"Yeah..."

Kris grins. "I've got an idea. Let's go!!! Let's go to Ohtori Academy!!!!" From the spaceship Zero Star, the new space akio-car flies for Earth with Kris, Two Chibis, and Five Gundam pilots for Ohtori. The license plate reads, "GIGLO4U". Kris discovered it in the trunk.

Day One at Ohtori

It's a quiet day at Ohtori. Well, Quiet for Ohtori. The new students Heero Yuy, Quatre Raberba Winner, Trowa Barton, Duo Maxwell, Chang Wufei, and Kris Maxwell (Yes...she took Duo's last name early..she is engaged...like Ohtori...she doesn't keep it all of...the...time. *Duo's braid flies up. Kris *eeps* and continues to narrate her story.).

Several days passed, and day 2 of our story...

She holds the lamp up to the light to look at it's glistening gold plated...uh...body? There's a loud scream of "My Shining Thing!". But before sweet and gentle glomping Miki can glomp Kris and the lamp, Wufei sticks his foot out.

Kris carries her lamp away and figures that the best place to do this would be in the dorm room of Becca and Karen. (Albeit she has no idea why that would be a good place.) The six pack (as we will call the six as a whole now), journeyed to the far reaches of space, known as Becca and Karen's dorm. Kris knocked on the door, and she is welcomed by a strange sight indeed. Once again, Karen is stapling Calvin Klein touga pictures on the wall, and Becca is despiratly trying to get out a straight jacket. Kris waves. "Uh...hi!"

The two girls look up, not surprised, and reply, "Hello."

"Miki's going after the lamp. Can I rub it here?"

"As long as you don't say that around Akio you can." Karen voices with a shrug. "What kind of a lamp is it?"

"Not sure. It was found by Duo over here."

Duo gives a smug look. "It was in the trunk of the Akio Car we stole."

"I see. Well then. Go ahead."

The six pack piles into the dorm and Kris plops down onto a bed and starts to rub. At first there's no response, then suddenly, she feels someone behind her mutter, "Ooh baby, that feels good.

Karen, Becca, and Kris *eep* as Akio leans against a wall, wearing a pair of Arabian silk pants, no shirt, and has a grin. "I am the genie of the Akio Lamp."

"WHAAAA?!" The three disgruntled girls run towards the other end of the wall, well...becca kind flomps over there, but they get there somehow.

Heero stares at her for a few moments. "You rubbed the lamp. What's wrong with that?"

"B-but it's hiiiiiiiiiim..." She mutters. Trowa cocks his head to the side.

There's a knock on the door, and Touga, Saionji, Utena, Anthy, Miki, and Juri walk in. Touga pauses for a brief moment, takes notice of Akio's attire, and turns around to write down notes. Returning with a grin, he sits down on the bed in his typical fashion, and admires his own pictures.

Juri steps towards Kris. "Don't worry, I'll protect you."

Kris's eyes get wide, and the gundam boys, all except for Heero and Quatre, bow their heads with sweatdrops.

"I get three wishes, right?" Kris asked Akio.

"No. You get as many as you want, but they have to be strange."

"What?" Kris blinked several times, looked at Karen and Becca, and then realized why he just said what he did."

The quiet and chauvanistic (very chauvanistic) Wufei stepped forward. "Why let a woman have wishes? She'll wish for power, even though she is weak."

Saionji suddenly had an idea for a club, and Wufei was his first target for Vice President.

Kris's eyes narrow. "Alright Genie of the Akio Lamp. My first wish, is for an hour, we all switch genders except for Me, Karen, and Becca."

At that particular moment, everyone screamed and Akio grinned. "Well that certainly shall be interesting."

He snapped his fingers and everyone was..um...different for the moment. At least. Karen and Becca blinked as Touga got up. "Damn." Karen stated. "Even as a chick he's fine..." Touga did a model's pose, and grinned.

Duo pulled open his shirt. "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH I've got..*This has been edited for content.*

Kris crosses her arms. Saionji and Wufei seem to be having a hard time though.

Wufei balls up his/her fists and Saionji starts to cry. "This is a disgrace!

I can't be a woman! They lack endurance! They lack strength! I hate this plushy body!!!" *

Kris rolled her eyes. "Shutup. Don't be so emotional woman."

Wufei stares in shock, and then runs away. "WAHHH NATAKU!!!!"

Saionji follows behind poor crying Wufei towards the bathroom, as all chicks go the the bathroom in packs.

Touga doesn't seem to be having much difficulty. Juri didn't care either, considering she was lesbian. Juri quickly ran off to find Shiori, or some chicks. Touga started to turn green with envy, and Becca stared. "Chrismas!"

"Kwanza!"Karen chirped.

"Hmm..." Akio grinned and moved next to Kris between Becca. "How are my beautiful ladies doing?"

Kris was okay until she saw Heero. "Heero..um...you need to wear a bra with spandex..."

Heero turned around. "Unfortunatly I don't have one..."

Trowa coughed. "If you did you'd be a pervert."

Quatre also didn't seem to care too much.

"I can't be a chick!!!" Duo squealed. Quatre smiles. "We understand Duo."

Duo hugs Quatre.

Quatre giggles. "You haven't changed that much, anyway."

"What's that supposed to mean, flat chest?!"

"FLAT CHEST FLAT CHEST! QUATRE'S GOT A FLAT CHEST!"

Trowa shakes his head as Quatre cries. "Wahhh! Duo's making fun of me."

Suddenly, there is a scream from a nearby bathroom. Miki runs out looking...well...genderless. Kris blinks. "What IS he?"

Karen and Becca step forward and the three grab Miki and push him down on a bed to inspect. "He hasn't changed...at all."

Akio blinks. "What? I don't make mistakes. I turned him into a female. I know I did."

He walks over between the three, and Becca eeps and backs away. He stares a poor befuddled Miki, and shakes his head. "Now why didn't it work. Okay, I'll change her into a male then." He snaps his fingers, but Miki stays the same.

For the first time ever, Akio starts to get worried. "What's wrong with him...I mean her...I mean...aww screw this. Female! Male! Female! Male!"

Quatre, Duo, Heero, and Trowa watch as the Genie of the Akio lamp tries despiratly to make some kind of difference in Miki's anatomy.

The three girls shake their heads and sigh. "Another day...another sad attempt to figure out Miki's gender."

Akio flomps down on the floor exhausted with a soft inaudible "damn."

Kris blinks and shakes her head. "Okay...well that's enough for now I guess. You can change them all back."

Touga, picking his head up, blinked. "What?"

Utena and Anthy, who had been hiding behind a door, sighed relief.

"Finally..."

Kris shook her head.

Day three of our story, a week later:

From outside a week later, Kris finds herself in Akio's office, with Touga not far away, Becca and Karen sitting in a chair also not far away, and her six pack outside the door, save for Duo.Akio stares at her on the lounge and blinks. "So could you explain to me why you're in here?"

Kris, knowing she was in deep crap because of her wish for an hour...(even if he WAS the genie) knew that her punishment might be a bit severe. "Well Dean...I wanna kill."

They all look at her strangely, as her first few weeks at Ohtori had been deranged anyway. They strugged and ignored her, as she was good at getting them out of trouble.

Duo leaned over to Touga. "Watch this. It's a classic move of hers."

"What do you mean?"

"Ever hear Alice's Restaurant?"

"I wanna kill, dean...I swear...I do..."

"Hmm...Continue." Akio give the okay with a grin on his face that can only say one thing. Kinky.

"I wanna see blood on the ground...veins in my teeth...kill...I wanna kill...I wanna...wanna kill..." She let her southern accent slip into it and even the rest were surprised.

Karen munched on a bag of popcorn, and Becca wiggled around in her straight jacket. Akio glanced over at them. "Be quiet...I'll get to you to later..."

The two girls stopped and stared in horror as their faces then went wooden.

Duo leaned back as Kris went on into one of her rants. "Kill...that's what I wanna do, because I'm the fianceé of Shinigami!!!"

Touga glanced over at Duo. "She must be pretty exotic."

"Yep. That's my girl."

Akio rolled his eyes. "Alright, enough of your drama. I'm charging you with sexual harrassment to Miki. But he probably won't let the case go far, considering nothing happened. The rest of them, save for Saionji and Wufei, don't care too much, they're back to normal."

Kris smirked. "Alright! We're off the hook!"

Day Four:

Kris sits in her Ohtori dorm room, with her sixpack crowded in the room as well. That's when she hears a knock on the door and Becca and Karen walk in.

"Hey. We got your message. What's up?" Becca asks as they walk in, step over a sleeping Wufei (who looks like a cabbage patch doll.) and grab a Chibi to cuddle. Duo sits on the bed behind her. Kris leans over.

"I gotta really good wish..."

Becca and Karen grin evilly as Kris spouts it.

Somewhere not far away, Nanami screams very deeply. "BIG BROTHER!!! LOOK!" Kris, Karen, and Becca order a pizza and make shaved ice to celebrate their new wish. Then...they might just invite Touga over for the third wish.

((Believe it or not...there might be a sequel to this...the duel of the pimps...I dunno...))

Ja ne!

Kris Maxwell!