Date: 6/15/99 11:34:43 PM Eastern Daylight Time

From: Sailor Dragon

To: SilvVenom@aol.com, sparrowskit@hotmail.com

Hiyas! ^O.O^ <--- Sailor Dragon's wired on mints....

I must say that I'd been avoiding your page for quite some time. Looking back on it now, I can see exactly WHY I avoided it... ^o.O^;; *ducks a mallet and sweatdrops* Kidding, kidding! ^n.n^;; Anyway, at first I just skipped over all the intro stuff on the pages because I was lazy (as my cohort who is not here at the moment, Neo PinkBunny will attest to...) Then I went into the The Creative Information Page and saw the whole bit with the 'underwear of the mobile asshole.' That's when I decided to read the rest of the pages. I'm still not through yet, but I nearly split my Sailor fuku I was laughing so hard! ^n.n^

Now, I have a few questions for you (well, actually, it's only ONE question, but you must answer truthfully or face my wrath!): was that the young Obi's nose or the old Obi's nose? *Either way, Sailor Dragon begins plotting ways to get Anthy and Utena drunk enough to summon Ewan McGreggor for her... ^H.H^ <--- Hentai Sailor Dragon*

I must admit, though, your pages have been very useful; as a Disciple of the Stopwatch, I have an obligation to... apprehend Miki-kun. ^H.H^ I now know how to lure our beloved pianist into my HDG (Hentai Drooling fanGirl) clutches! Mwahahahahaha! *Sailor Dragon puts on one of those miners helmets with the cute little light in it and flips the light on*

*Suddenly, a shout of "My Shining Thing!" echoes across the room and Sailor Dragon is bowled over by Miki (ala Enzo from ReBoot). Sailor Dragon takes this opportunity to GLOMP onto Miki* Miki-kun! ^n.n^ <--- one happy HDG

"Stop right there!" a new voice calls. The camera pans up and we see a rabbit-eared figure in Sailor fuku backlit by several radioactive rapidly gestating and multiplying Rabbits of Doom. Miki gasps! "It's..."

"The other half of the Freaknamic Duo!" Sailor Dragon supplies cheerfully.

"Who's the first half?" Miki asks.

"Me!" Sailor Dragon cries and squeezes Miki tightly. Suddenly we can see that, wonder of wonders, the figure is Neo PinkBunny!

"What're you doing to him? That's MY Tasuki, you know." PinkBunny jumps down from the incredibly tall lamp-post she stood on and tries to wrest Miki away from her cohort.

"Tasuki's got RED hair, PB!" Sailor Dragon shouts, exasperated.

"Oh," PinkBunny says, letting Sailor Dragon have Miki. As if on cue, Touga walks past. A typical HDG grin spreads across PB's face and she plasters herself to Touga. Sailor Dragon snickers as she sees Touga headed for Becka and Karen's dorm...

"She gets everything she deserves for trying to steal MY Miki!"

Miki coughs politely, "Don't I have any say in this?"

"No!"

Anyway, if my HDG friends don't object...

Another voice is heard in the distance. "I object!" Suddenly a horse gallops up ridden by a 5'11" girl wearing a shirt with a snake on it.

"Who's that?" Miki inquires. Sailor Dragon heaves a sigh.

"That's La Neigh, the OTHER Disciple of the Stopwatch (for the moment). What do you need?"

"Miki, of course," she replies. Sailor Dragon pouts.

"I let you have Demando," she protests. "I'll even share Saffiru with you, but PLEASE let me have Miki!"

"But Demando and Saffiru are dead," Neigh pouts. Sailor Dragon heaves another sigh and hands Miki over. La Neigh thanks her friend and the two gallop happily off into the sunset (while incidentally almost running over Nanami).

Drat. I was so close! Oh well, there's still Akio. *As if on cue, a red car careens to a stop mere inches away from a VERY frightened Sailor Dragon.*

"Hidooi! This is NOT in my contract!" a very feminine voice shouts from behind the wheel. The camera pans over and we see a very disgruntled... Nuriko? Indeed, it is Nuriko with his braid undone and his hair flowing around him in a very Akio-esque manner.

"Well, you're not Akio, but I still love you!" Sailor Dragon giggles and leaps into the passenger seat. "Ne, Nuriko-sama, why're you here?"

Nuriko goes starry-eyed. "I wanted to pick Hotohori-sama up for a date but I didn't have a car or the money to rent one. So I called my agent and asked him what I could do." His expression darkens. "He said they needed a gorgeous man with purple hair to fill in for someone on the 'Utena' cast. I would get to drive a car, so that was the only reason I agreed. I never realized I'd have to show people the Ends of the World, OR have to put some girl named Becka in a straight jacket."

Sailor Dragon looks perplexed. "Ne, Nuriko-sama.. If you're here, where's Akio?"

*SCENE SHIFT*

Akio overshadows Miki (who fell of his horse somewhere between here and the sunset), holding his stopwatch in one hand and a straight jacket in another...

*SCENE SHIFT*

"Oh, nevermind. I've forgotten what I wanted to say at the end of this email. Ne, Nuriko-sama, what are you supposed to do first: show me the Ends of the World or tie up Becka in a straight jacket?" Nuriko starts the car and drives off at high speeds, his beautiful purple hair streaming in the wind.

"Um... I think I'm supposed to put Becka in a straight jacket first, then show someone the Ends of the World..." He glances warily at his passenger. "Why?"

Sailor Dragon goes SD for a moment. "Sugoi! That means I can deliver this e-mail to them personally!"

And so our epic saga (an E-Saga, if you will) comes to a close as our heroine and her favorite cross-dresser drive off into the sunset in Akio car. The scene fades to black.

THE END

Suddenly, SD Sailor Dragon pops up. "Oh yah, keep up the spiffy work you two! Thanks for listening to me ramble!"

-- Sailor Dragon (AKA the Bespectacled Bishounen Hunter ^o-o^)

PS No anime characters or Drooling Hentai fanGirls were harmed during the production of this e-mail.