I would love to beat the face,
Of any mother fucker that's thinkin' they can change me,
White knuckles grip pushing through for the gold,
If you're wantin' a piece of me I broke the mother fuckin' mold,
I'm drowning in your wake
Shit rubbed in my face
Teething on concrete
Gums bleeding

Dig bury me underneath
Everything that I am rearranging
Dig bury me underneath
Everything that I was slowly changing

I struggle in violated space,
Sell out motherfuckers in the biz that try to fuck me,
Hang from their T's rated P.G. insight,
I ain't sellin' my soul when there's nothing to buy
I'm livid in my space
Pissing in my face
Fuck you while you try
To fuck me

Dig bury me underneath
Everything that I am rearranging
Dig bury me underneath
Everything that I was you ain't fuckin' changing me

Let me help you tie the rope around your neck,
Let me help to talk you the wrong way off the ledge,
Let me help you hold the glock against your head
Let me help you tie the rope around your neck,
Let me help to talk you the wrong way off the ledge,
Let me help you hold the glock up to your head,
Let me help to chain the weights onto your legs
Get on the plank fuck

Dig bury me underneath
Everything that I am rearranging
Dig bury me underneath
Everything that I was slowly changing
Wish you were committing
Suicide suckin' on a mother fuckin' tailpipe
Dead man dangling from a tight rope
Limbless in the middle of a channel bob away

Cop provisions feed my addictions mistakes I made then
I opened up the holes and they crawled in,
Now when it's time for the feed they won't let me forget,
They ride upon my back and they'll fuck me with their need,
My invisible enemies all my monkeys

Their coming they're coming their coming they're coming to take me away.

Disgusted with my position so submissive I am the only way we get away is give in sharpen up the razors stab the needles into pipes to kill cravings so sick of this in me can't stand the want to need can't get free always got a grip on me

There's no use to fight this wrenching tourniquet of deprivation obedience subservience leads to substance

Do you want more give it to me

Leave my motivation to chemical dependency no room for patience
Don't want it need it come on right now

Everything I've become now is everything I didn't want to be

Every time I try to run away I fall on my face they drag me back
Every time I try to run away I fall on my face

Help! They won't leave me alone

If I would have known back then what I know now I 'd take it back
If I would have known back then what I know now I 'd take it back,
I'd take it back I'd take it all fuckin' back

Stay away stay away
Hold me I'm shaking violently
Pull me out of my covering
Mold me into a new man
Lull me into a deep sleep

There's no use to fight this wrenching tourniquet of deprivation obedience subservience leads to substance

Even if you want you can't stop

Internal primates forever

Losses, losers and more, gain of life's pleasures cohorts listen behind the doors to a life meaningless less than 0 in me all my
walls falling down pains aloft misery I'm sure that the lessons were learned I'm sure that the punishments went well deserved by the pawn in the plan taste of shit bitterness walk from me everything systematically

Come on you were the one you were the one,
To dredge up shit inside of me in my pointless life of nothing
Tell me what I'm supposed to be
Tell me who I'm supposed to be
Tell me what it takes to ascend
Tell me what it takes to live

Patience, pleasures and rewards, come in due time stare at the sun I'm bored in a life meaningless
soaking up all of me like the cross you worship life is loss look at me I'm sure that some day we'll wake up I'm sure that some day we'll wake from the dream
Of success and focus...tunneling to the light glowing deep inside of me your taunting I wake up

Come on youweretheone youweretheone,
To dredge up shit inside of me in my pointless life of nothing
Tell me what I'm supposed to be
Tell me who I'm supposed to be
Tell me what it takes to ascend
Tell me what it takes to live
Tell me nOW!
Tell me nOW!

Pain misery distress dismal know where depressed idiot failure
In me......calling......loser......man I'm the Loser......loser.....loser......in me......who I am....in me....

Don't feel sorry don't feel sorry for me
Don't need your sympathy or empathy, don't need your sympathy inside of me,
Don't need your sympathy or empathy, don't need your sympathy inside of me,
Don't feel sorry don't feel sorry for me

Come on
I know you were the one you were the one
Numb to feelings inside of me why I've seized my vision
Don't need you to tell me who to be
Don't need you to tell me what to be
Don't need you to tell me how to ascend
Don't need you to tell me how to live

Cold seems crippling lame meander through corridors aroma's thick with age mark off the day reflections of my life are fading
Pull me out of body don't want it don't want in,
Feeble frail and rotting descending I'm lost in,
A structure that's collapsing don't want it cast into,
Maker take the body don't want it wants me

Past has found its place salvation is no more will god accept my peace bleached will pardon me reflections of my life are fading
Pull me out of body don't want it don't want in,
Feeble frail and rotting descending I'm lost in,
A structure that's collapsing don't want it cast into,
Maker take the body don't want it wants me

I just want to run fly kites wrestle jump and play
Swim through waves that crash to shore memories in me cocooned in misery

I'm sick and tired of embracing reflections of past time receive me or cast me away ...god please take me away
Resistance futile suicidal ideas I will crucify my own being satisfy selfish needs fuck the deities justify my own right to what's waiting for me

On the other side the time has come lock and load
I'm coming I'm coming I'm coming I'm coming home

Pull me out of body don't want it don't want in,
Pull me out of body don't want it don't want in,
Pull me out of body don't want it don't want in,
Feeble frail and rotting descending I'm lost in,
A structure that's collapsing descending don't want it,
Maker take the body don't want it wants me,
Pull me out of body don't want it don't want in,
Feeble frail and rotting descending I'm lost in,
A structure that's collapsing descending don't want it,
Maker take the body don't want it wants me

I just want to run fly kites wrestle jump and play Swim through waves that crash to shore memories in me cocooned in misery
The darkness overcomes soul soars to the other plain
Existence past the door I sail through purgatory's bay

I asked a god for poison cradle me sown to my dreams souls searching death blossoms where clouds lie over me held in god's hands death blooming

Dark for fear of failure an inner gloom as wide as an eye and fermenting roiling hate death grip in my veins unveiling rancid petals flowering forth foul nectar the space between a blink and a tear ...death blooms.

Breathe...
Push...
...I lost you, you were my god thought what do I do now you were never there for me never there to carry me,
26 years looking back that time is gone it was you I believed in look what you've done to me realize what you've done to

Me!!!

I can't see going on in this darkness I'm blind beneath my cradle the bough has broke, I exorcise my loss your lie the punishment

It takes time to try to mend the wounds of all the suffering,
What do I do now all I'm asking from you please send me a sign to guide me through the times that lie in front of me
I'll get by myself

Look at me now, a piece of shit like you.
Look at me now, you left me so fuck you.

Everybody leaves me, everybody's gone.
Watch my father leave me, there's nobody left.
Feels like I've never been loved.
Everybody leaves me, never gave a shit about me.
Everybody's gone, I'll rot in my head alone.
I don't give a fuck about you, go the fuck away.

Fake being, inside of my heart you are the liar.
Innocence displaced.
Been left.

Here I stand now and I'm alone,
With no one to comfort me.
One set of footprints in the sand.
No one to take my hand, I'll.
I'll walk through as long as I need.
I'll drift through my life though I'm alone.
Outgrown the cradle that once housed me
And I've found that all I need is
Me.

Found I've never needed you to push through
All the shit that stacks up inside of my life.
Endless plight that circulates through my body.
I'll keep stumbling, beating, pummeling
Teething on the rind and renounce my being.

I can't see going on.

I can't see
I'm so tired, of trying to mend the wounds of all my suffering.
What do I do now?
All I'm asking from you please,
Send me a sign
To guide me through the times that lie in front of me.
I'll get by myself

I can't see going on fuck it.

Cold and silent, soiled face I will wash it all away,
With my love,
That's all she's ever needed, from me
It's my time, to mother,
One of my own in my life,
I am so alone, left with no one
In my life, I'm so alone

Life submissiveness,
Hypnotizing the ignorant a little boy's best friend's always his mother,
At least that's what she said,
Life of a simple man,
Taught that everyone else is dirty,
And their love is meaningless,
I'm just a soiled dirty boy,
I'm just a soiled dirty boy,

Sheltered life innocence,
Insulated memories, spark reflections of my head,
Duality in my consciousness,
Caught in the war of hemispheres,
Between the love lost in my head,
Mommy do you still live inside of me,
I'm so lost in my life without any guiding,
Protected me my whole life from everything,
Nailed shut the doors to the shrine,
To screen your dead eyes from me and my sickness,
Mutilate and sew my new clothes for masquerading,
Aprons of flesh corpse scalped hair with skin upon my face,

Deliver the remains from her womb of earth,
Prep the rack and tie up for new love's rebirth,
Covert understanding of novice surgery,
I'll focus concentration and only take just what I need
For sickness I'm masticating,
Dancing and masturbating,
Celebrate in fields of night with skin upon my face

If I soak my hands in others blood am I sick,
If I wash my hands in others blood am I sick,
If I drench myself in others blood am I sick,
If I bathe myself in others blood

Blame mother for the sickness,
Mutilate and sew my new clothes for masquerading,
Aprons of flesh corpse scalped hair with skin upon my face,
Dance and masturbate in night light by myself..

Nothing is left for me to gain they're coming to take me far away,

Life of a simple man taught that everyone else is dirty and love is meaningless
I'm so soiled
Soiled

We swallow the spit,
Steal acceptance lend denial,
Telling me that my life is free and boundless,
Then I'm forced to stay between the lines,
They construct death to demolish life,
Plant the seeds to harvest loss,
Found empty truth is full of lies,

We're hoping for despair,
Starvation's gluttony,
Subtle chaotic peace,
War divided unity,
Pro life, pro choice,
Blinded insight,
Left wing, right wing,
Black, white,
Leaders following,

I am everything I am nothing,

Stop fuckin' with me,
I'm the accused I'm not the enemy
You're so confused no way you could enlighten me,
No freedom trapped in slavery, deceitful honesty mother fuckin' human not a machine

Lay your hands upon me,
In search for answers inviting,
Constant struggle inside me,
Guide me through this nothing that's everything

I am everything I am nothing

And we hide behind,
Lies, anger, Hate they shoo love away,
Build shells of ourselves outside,
It shelters body from cold reigns of reality,

Come on, Step out, of your rind, assemble strength, focus,

Release and run to me you can never look back to the visions from the past they fade and wilt in time,
You've got to just trust me to hold your hand through,
Then I turn and walk away,

Eclipse you,
And bleed you strip you of your states of ain soph aur,
Eclipse you,
I spit up on my plate and I push everything away,
I need,
And we sever all ties,
It creates disruption midst circle of friends,
I become the sacrifice,
Spare your life and leave me to my misery,

Get off the cross, and save yourself, run away

Run now get away from me if I can get my grip I'll pull you down into the hell I call my head you'll never get away
I sit down in my ugly place and build walls out of fragments from my past of all the people that I needed and loved that walked away,

You've got to just trust me to hold your hand through then I'll turn and walk away

I walk under the clouds of gray,
Sphere of storms in my head,

I'm trapped again in endless rain
I divorce the thoughts of you I love with me,
I divorce your innocence and my guilt,
I divorce the lying sellout confidence,
I'm divorcing every mother fuckin' thing
I divorce the love bled meaningless,
I divorce the makeshift harmony,
I divorce the taunting acts of violence,
I divorce the pastime of jealousy,
I divorce control,
I divorce the faith,
I divorce the virtue,
I divorce the rain,
I divorce the excuse,
I divorce the greed,
I divorce the need,
I divorce iniquity in this mother fuckin' bullshit life,
Just want it all to go away,
Just want to run away to die, take it, myself, my life
Text book fucking mental, off me and pitch me in a hole

I'll always be your shadow,
And veil your eyes from states of ain soph aur,
I can't be the hero anymore,
I spit up on my plate and then I turn and walk away,
I spit up on my plate and I disrupt the family,
I spit up on my plate and I sever the entity,
And I feel your warm sun on my face
Separate.

Eclipse you and bleed you strip you of your states of ain soph aur,
I need you,
It's always been this way, I push it all away,
From me

Emotions inside us troubling,
The hatred inside us escalating,
The sickness inside us keeps us weak,
The masses inside of us suffering they are bleeding,
The calling inside us sick with greed,
The voices calling to us deafening we're not listening

Cannot receive the obvious
Line up cattle and cut the necks
Swat at the flies omit disgust

The leaders inside us posturing,
The pollution inside of us suffocating me,
The science inside us menacing
The will that's inside of us its dying end is coming

Cannot receive the obvious
Line up cattle and cut the necks
Drain us of life and cleanse the mess

Wash me off inside, wash me off inside

We're killing ourselves killers
Goddamn we fucked up the circumstance,
Too late to save us from ourselves,
Callous minds against trust and confidence,
Too late to give a damn now
Too late to save us from ourselves, too late to make it all go away,
Too late to beg pardons from the mother, too late to give a damn

Now we'll sit and wait

Wait wait for the coming of the end
Wait for the coming the killing the ending the plight of man
Deserving no mercy expelling by god's hand,
It's okay the ending it's over no more pain.

Emotion the hatred the sickness the calling

Does your god come in a capsule,
To sedate you tear the walls down,
Headless prison cannibals chew,
to consume you bring the alien,

Halcium and morphine,
5-methoxy-n, n-dimethyltryptamine,
Psilocybin, mescaline, aspirin, histomine,
Brushite, darvaset, valium, caffeine, cannabis, and LSD,
Ayahuasca, harmine give it all to me I want it

These are just a few of my favorite things

Trisolam and zanex, serotonin, mdma, ibogaine, dopeamine,
Tetra-hydro-chloride, atenolol,
Amanita muscaria,
Boric oxide, arrabinitol, psilocin, and flamizine, Cylotec and harmaline
Give it all to me I want it

Does your god come in a capsule to sedate you,
Tear the walls down, headless prison,
Cannibals chew to consume you,
Bring the alien

You can't kill me,
I'm already dead
Inside my hole,
Inside my head,
We just beg for any way to be sedated,
It's all about escaping,
Numb to me,
Numb body from this hell,

I can feel them pushing, I can feel them pulling
I can feel them holding, I can feel them moving,
I can feel them prying, I can feel them prodding,
I can feel them breathing, I can feel them digging
I can feel them stabbing, I can feel them scoping,
I can feel them living, I can feel it,
Consume, take in, plunging, plumbing,
Instruments prying, aliens inside me,
Tooling the machine,
Intoxicating,
Feel it unfolding, riddles in me

It's all about escaping, we just beg for any way to get away
Who do you bow down to, does your god come in a capsule or on a plate
They're trying to sedate you, swallow self and bring on the alien
You tried to kill me, I'm already dead to this world
I'm already dead to this world

Nailed inside my head,
Fuck this I don't need your shit,
All the lies deceit and arrogance,
Talk your shit like my life is some kinda game,
Like you fuckin' know me,
Just go far away and be small,
Run far away and be small,
Go lie in a hole and be small,

Thorns, splinters, pushing,
Under my skin,
They want in,
Sharpened tongue to penetrate me,

If you really think you got what it takes to be me,
Then walk a mile in the skin of my head case mental being,
So you want a piece of this life that belongs to me,
Well make a cut on the line and take a deeper look inside of the freak,

That is me, fucker, come on,

Disturb, search me, prying up all my scales
To get in lance the core to penetrate me,

So you want inside of me,
So you want a piece of this,
So you want to tear me down, for your own selfish wants and needs

Disturb, search me, prying, up all my scales,
To get in, lance the core to penetrate me,

So you want inside of me
So you want a piece of me,
So you want to drag me down,
For your own selfish wants and needs

You were there like a punk,
Just to get in my face,
Wanted in me wanted to be
Till I gave you a taste
Don't need your goddamn pressure
Frontin' stress I'm superman motherfucker
Without the "s" on my chest
Trying to step in my circle I'm leaving you purple and black
On your back drop your ass like a heart attack
Rippin' through your life like a motherfuckin'
Hurricane fist full of Novocain for the pain
You're nothing in my life in my head
You're nothing in my life in my land
Nailed inside my head

You're under my fuckin' skin!
I have cleansed my life now of the people who pry
And threaten place always in my face I think it's time for them to
Go away always in my fuckin' space,
Always in my scene always in my sight,
Always in my way

You're dead to me punk ass fuck

There's nothing left

Frozen moments in time,
Stopped hourglass,
They predicate, what you will know,
Dispositions lie within,
And so do we,
Don't want to run.
Don't want to hide,
Renounce the prayers for inspiration,
If you dictate what I will be
Then smash my face upon the concrete I'm weary,

I feel the stares piercing,
So sorry to soil your precious eyes,
Reflections spoon-feed you,
The bitterness and disgust that is me,
If you choose to reach out to lend to me,
I'll chew off your hand

I'm not beggin' for your fuckin' change
I'm not beggin' for your fuckin' change
I'm in touch with myself,
All alone within myself,
All one. Alone

Do what you will make it the whole of your law,
Burn down the faith that shadows life
And take a deeper look inside of what makes you
Pull down the shades internal light can be blinding
Brilliance
I'm not begging for your fuckin' change,
I'm just begging for a fuckin' change,
Complacence quenched of me

Lineage is ending

I am that, once was me, rising upward, guts wrenching
Sculpted cold, blistering, break the mold, sever me

Cut your throat, be the martyr, bitter pills, that we swallow,

Take me, chase me, swallow with me

Know, now, know, now

Inside of truth, coming to, close to me, ground consumes and embraces me
Now forever

Born again,
I'm repositioning,
Self inside to self non-dimensional,
Lost to being,
I've recognized the cause,
Existence to come, alive now forever

I am once was
...that is me
I am once was,
That is me