Part 248

The exhausted group made their way to the elevators only to be met by Billy and the rest of their bodyguards.

"What’s up, Billy?" asked Kevin.

"The press has gotten wind of the birth and Sarah being here. It’s pretty bad downstairs."

"Can you get us through?" asked Brian.

"That’s what I wanted to talk to you about. Do you really want to face them now? We can get you out another way."

Everyone looked at each other and then at Sarah who had her arms around Howie’s waist leaning on him. She was exhausted and the guys were worried about her.

"Howie, what do you want to do?" asked Kevin.

Howie looked at Sarah. "Angel, it’s up to you."

Sighing deeply, Sarah said, "I’m not going to run from them."

"You don’t have to do this, Sarah," said Raoul. "You’ve been through a lot."

Howie said softly, "Angel, NO ONE will think less of you if you don’t face them."

"Howie’s right, ‘Tigger’," reassured AJ.

"I’ll be okay as long as I have you guys with me."

Kevin spoke, "Standard answer, guys…’No Comment’. We get Sarah in the car and I’ll make a statement before I get in."

The ride down was quiet and just as they were ready to step off the elevator, Raoul put his hand on Sarah’s back.

"I’ll get you through," he said quietly.

"Thank you," whispered Sarah.

Raoul and Tommy surrounded Howie and Sarah following Brian and Jimmy and as they stepped off the elevator, the assault began. Cameras popped, microphones were shoved in their faces, and questions rained down on the group. The security moved them through the crowd easily with the guys repeating ‘No Comment’ and Howie holding Sarah close by his side to protect her.

With Sarah safely in the car, Kevin turned to the crowd of reporters.

"Kevin! What’s going on? Why are the four of you here with Sarah? Where’s Nick and his wife? Is Sarah okay?"

"Look, it’s been a long day for all of us. I promise, as soon as we get some rest, we’ll answer ALL your questions. Just give us some time."

"Why wasn’t Sarah on that flight and why was it reported she was?"

"I told you…you’ll get your answers."

"When Kevin?"

"Soon…before we leave Toronto." With that, Kevin got in closing the door on the chaos. "Let’s go."

On the ride to the hotel, Sarah put her head on Howie’s shoulder and fell asleep quickly. None of the guys wanted to disturb her so they rode in silence.

As they neared the hotel, Kevin asked, "Want me to carry her, D?"

Howie was exhausted physically and emotionally but he didn’t want to let go of his wife…his angel. He shook his head, "No, I’ve got her. I need you to do me another favor though."

"What?"

"Find out why her message wasn’t delivered. I want answers and if she told them she was my wife, why wasn’t her call put through."

"Howie, you know management. If they put a stop on calls, it was ALL calls, no matter who it was," said Brian.

"To hell with management," growled Howie. "She’s my wife and they knew I’d want the call."

Sarah shifted and mumbled in her sleep.

"Calm down, D," urged AJ. "You’re gonna wake Sarah."

"Howie, think about it. There are reports that your wife is dead and the airlines had confirmed that she was on that flight. A call comes through, someone claiming to be your wife. Would you REALLY want them to put a call through and it be a prank?" Said Brian rationally.

Howie thought about it. "I guess not."

"I’ll find out why her message wasn’t delivered though," said Kevin. "Just take her to your room and get some sleep."

Gratefully, Howie said, "Thanks….all of you."

At the hotel, the guys helped Howie get Sarah out and they all headed inside. There was a handful of fans waiting for them but when they saw Sarah in Howie’s arms, they backed off.

Tommy got Howie’s room opened for him and before he took Sarah in, AJ and Brian started to say goodnight.

"Let us know if you need anything, D," said Brian.

"Yeah…we’re just a phone call away," said AJ.

By now, Howie was finding it difficult to hide his emotions. He’d held it together all night for Sarah’s sake. There was Becca and the fans too. He had already broken down once in front of the fans. But now in the security of their hall where no outsiders were allowed, Howie started to cry, his whole body shaking.

In a raspy voice, Howie said, "For a short time, I thought I’d lost her…the only woman who has ever truly loved ME…the whole me."

Fearing that Howie was going to collapse, AJ quickly took Sarah from him and carried her inside while Brian put his arm around Howie helping him into the room. Howie collapsed on the couch never realizing that AJ had taken Sarah into the bedroom.

Brian pressed a glass into Howie’s hand and he quickly downed it. "Thanks, Bri."

Brian sat beside him rubbing his back. "Are you going to be okay?"

"God! What if I had lost her?"

"But you didn’t, Howie! She’s in the next room, safe and sound!"

"If…IF I hadn’t insisted she go…IF she hadn’t gotten sick…."

"You can’t dwell on the ‘what ifs’, Howie. They’ll kill you."

In the bedroom, AJ had set Sarah down on the bed and was starting to undress her when she called out softly for Howie. "Shhh..it’s me, ‘Tigger’."

Sleepily, "Where’s Howie?"

"He’s out in the other room with Brian talking."

Feeling AJ unfastening her jeans, Sarah was wide-awake. "What the HELL are you doing, Alex?"

"Undressing you…so you can go to sleep."

Sarah sat up. "I don’t THINK so!"

"Tigger, I’m hurt," shot AJ putting his hand on his heart and pretending to pout.

Sarah smiled, "Oh, get over yourself, Alex. Besides, what were you gonna put on me? I don’t have anything here."

"I figured I’d just get your jeans and shoes off and let Howie handle the rest. I wasn’t gonna do any more."

Howie’s voice drifted in to the two and Sarah heard the fear and pain. Looking at AJ, she said, "Oh god…he’s blaming himself, isn’t he?"

"No, he’s just letting it all out. Sarah, I’ve never seen him so scared. He never gave up on you but he was terrified of the reality."

Getting up, Sarah started for the other room. She stopped at the door to listen to Howie.

"Damnit, Brian! When I said ‘till death us do part’, I imagined a long, long time. Then this! We’ve only been married three months! And if she HAD been on that plane, it would have been my fault," and Howie threw the glass he’d been holding against the wall shattering it.

The glass hit just inches from where Sarah stood, causing her to jump.

Alex was behind her and said, "Damn, D! You keep throwing glasses like that and you’re gonna end up hurting someone."

Through his tears, Howie saw Sarah and realized he’d almost hit her and he started crying harder. "All I’ve done is hurt you, Sarah!"

Sarah saw his pain and she moved to him quickly taking him in her arms as she sat on the couch. Howie melted into her arms needing her security. She held him as he cried letting all the feelings he’d had over the last two days go. Her own tears mixed with his as she cried too.

Brian and AJ let themselves out quietly leaving the couple alone.

After some time, Sarah whispered, "D, you haven’t hurt me!! In fact, if it hadn’t been for you, I would have been on that flight. It was because of you that I was throwing up."

"I could have lost you…forever Sarah! We’re suppose to be TOGETHER forever."

"We will be, Howie. I’m here now!"

"How can you be so sure? Look at what almost happened!"

"There are no guarantees in life, Howie, but even if we are separated…we’ll still be a part of each other," said Sarah as she pulled away. She put her hand on Howie’s heart. "You always tell me that I’m your heart…well, that’s where we’ll be together…forever…in our hearts."

Howie wiped his tears with his sleeve. "I kept seeing my future without you, Sarah…and I wasn’t sure how I was going to go on."

"You’d have found a way, D…once you thought about it and realized that Jesse needed you. You’ll always have a part of me and Jesse loves you, Howie. She’s NEVER doubted your love or that you are her daddy. You’re her boyfriend, her hero," soothed Sarah as she caressed his cheek. "In the few short weeks, you’ve been more of a father to her than Russell EVER was."

"I love her too," answered Howie softly. He put his hand on hers and turned his head slightly to kiss the palm. "Angel, I’d take care of her but it wouldn’t be the same without you."

Sarah brushed his cheek with her thumb. "You won’t have to find out, Howie. I’m here and I’m okay! Tired and in need of my husband’s arms around me…but I’m okay."

Howie lay her down on the couch covering her body with his. "I need you too, Angel."

Sarah ran her fingers through his hair gazing into his eyes. "I need to call Dusty before we go to bed and I need some clothes off the bus."

"You aren’t gonna need anything to sleep in," smirked Howie. "Don’t take long and I’ll get Lisa to loan you some clothes until we get back to the bus. Make the call so we can go to bed."

 

Part 249        The Dance Index(3)