Part 300

Everyone had left the stage for some down time except Sarah. She sat on the drum risers looking over the revisions they had made in her material.

From the shadows, Kevin stood watching her. Her hair fell across her face as she tried for about the hundredth time to push it back and his thoughts went to the times she’d lain in bed with him, her hair falling just the same way as she’d look up at him with those blue eyes begging him to touch her or kiss her.

Before September 11th, he’d reconciled himself to having nothing more than a close friendship with Sarah but in those thirty-six hours that they had thought Sarah was on that plane, Kevin realized just how much she meant to him. There was no getting around it; he was as deeply in love with Sarah as she was with Howie.

Hearing a noise, Sarah glanced over to see Kevin watching her. "I thought you were gone."

Kevin ambled over to her and stood between her legs facing her. "I came back to tell you that the photographer won’t be here until after dinner. You’ll have time to rest this afternoon."

Sarah smiled. "Your doings?"

"Yeah. Howie was right."

"But you’ll never admit it to him, will you?"

"No. Are you okay?"

"I’m a little tired but other than that, I’m fine." Sarah looked up at him and brushed his hair back. "Question is, are you okay?"

"Sure. Why wouldn’t I be?"

"I don’t know. You’ve just got this sad look about you, like something’s wrong."

Kevin gave her a lazy smile as he took her hand in his. "Always looking out for everyone else…first Becca, then Nick, and now me."

"Gotta take care of my friends," she as she wove her fingers with his. "Kevin, do me a favor, please."

"Sure."

"Back off Howie. He doesn’t need you trying to one up him at every turn or trying to tell him what to do when it comes to me. His patience is really stretched thin right now and I’m not sure he’s going to make it through the week without hurting Nick…or someone else."

"Okay. What’s up with Howie’s mood anyway? I thought after you two got back together, things would be okay."

"I’m not exactly sure but I expect it’s all that’s happened SINCE I joined him in Toronto…Garrett being born, my melt-down, my dad, Claudia’s crap, me collapsing. He hasn’t been sleeping all that well worrying about me."

"We’ve all been really worried about you, Sarah, and it’s even worse because we can’t hold you at night and reassure you…"

"You mean YOU can’t hold me at night?"

Kevin smiled, "Am I that obvious?"

 

"Yeah, kinda…especially to Howie."

"I can’t help it, Sarah. When Jeff told us that you were on that plane, I thought I was going to be sick but I had to hold it in. It wasn’t my place to show how I truly felt, especially since you’re Howie’s wife. All I could think about was what I would never be able to do with you again; dancing with you backstage, holding you tight, seeing those beautiful blue eyes looking at me, hearing your sweet voice as you sing or talk to Jesse to soothe her fears," said Kevin as he took his free hand and ran it through Sarah’s hair. Leaning in close, he kissed her tenderly, his tongue slipping in to taste her.

With her hand on Kevin’s chest, she pushed him back, surprised that he’d do this. "Kevin, don’t!"

He looked at her and said, "You don’t mean it…you want me to kiss you."

"No, Kevin…I don’t. It’s not right. I love Howie very much."

"Sarah, I can’t help it. I’m hopelessly in love with you and that night in Toronto, when I saw you coming towards the stage, I wanted to take you in MY arms and never let you go."

"Kevin…you have got to stop this! I can’t stand to hurt you but I’m Howie’s wife, his soul mate. We were meant to be together."

"I know that but I can’t help myself. I thought I had it under control…that I was past it…until we thought…"

Sarah reached up to wipe his tears. "Kevin, stop it! I do love you a great deal. Next to Howie, you’re my best friend and you’ve done so much to help me realize my dreams. I know that if I ever need a friend, you’ll be there in my corner to help me. But I LOVE Howie totally and completely. He’s my other half, Kevin."

"I know all that. You two are so perfect together…I was just…hell, I don’t know what I was thinking. Howie is one of my best friends, my brother, and I’m standing here hitting on his wife who is pregnant with his children."

"It’s okay, Kevin."

"Where is Howie anyway?"

"He’s spending time with Jesse. He was going to take her to a park or something to get her out."

"Come on. You haven’t eaten and I’m NOT gonna make him mad by keeping you from food."

Kevin stepped back and helped Sarah down off the drum risers. Together, Sarah’s arm wrapped around Kevin’s waist, the two headed to find something to eat.

************

From the wings, he stood watching the two and as Kevin kissed his wife, his fists clenched. Starting towards them, he saw Sarah push Kevin back and stopped. Moving off to the side, he listened as she proclaimed her love for him once again.

‘Let her handle this,’ he thought.

Stepping back into the shadows once more, Howie listened to the two. Seeing that they were headed backstage, he moved quickly so that they wouldn’t know he was there.

As Sarah and Kevin came through the double doors, Sarah spotted Howie leaning against an equipment box talking to ‘Mook’.

"Hey, D," smiled Sarah as she rushed to him to hug him. "How long have you been back?"

"Not long. Jesse was tired so I brought her back and she’s taking her nap on the bus. Have you had lunch yet?"

"No, not yet. That’s where Kevin was making me go now."

"I’ll bet," glared Howie at Kevin. Then looking back at Sarah, he said, "I bought you lunch and it’s out in the refrigerator on the bus."

Sarah looked at Kevin. "Thanks, Kevin."

"No problem."

Kevin watched as the couple walked hand in hand out of the arena headed towards the buses before going off to find something to do while they waited to do soundchecks.

**************

 

As Sarah finished the last of her seafood salad that Howie had brought her, she looked at him as he strummed his guitar. She knew she had to tell Howie about Kevin and she wanted to tell him. What she wasn’t looking forward to was his reaction but better here where Raoul, Billy, and Tommy were close by in case she needed them to stop him from going after Kevin.

"Howie, something happened earlier…with Kevin."

Howie looked up knowing what she was about to tell him. He had known that she would tell him, it was just a matter of time and it was a relief to know that she’d chosen to tell him sooner rather than later. He didn’t say anything but nodded his head to tell her to go on.

"Kevin kissed me. You were right…Kevin’s not over me."

Howie set his guitar down and took Sarah in his lap. Holding her close, he said, "I saw what happened, Angel, and I heard what you said to him."

"Why didn’t you say something, let me know you were there?"

"Because if I had gone with my first instinct, there would have been a fight. You handled it the way it should have been handled without causing any problems or hard feelings."

"Howie, I love you with all my heart and I meant what I told Kevin. You are my best friend, my soul mate…my other half."

Sarah watched him, seeing that his dark mood hadn’t really gone away and she was worried. It wasn’t like Howie to be like this and she knew that soon, he was going to ‘blow’. She prayed that when he did, she’d be able to handle him.

"I know, Angel." Howie put his hand on her stomach asking, "Are they moving much?"

Sarah smiled, "Yeah, they are! Your swivel hips must be hereditary. I swear they are dancing in there!"

Howie laughed, "Not much room for them to do but so much. What are you going to do this afternoon?"

"I really need to go get some maternity clothes and Kevin arranged for the photographer not to be here until after dinner."

"You gonna get Lisa to go with you?"

"Yeah. I hate shopping so having someone with me will make it less painful."

Howie laughed. "MY wife doesn’t like to shop!! I am glad to see you and Lisa doing stuff together though."

"Yeah, Lisa’s pretty cool. I’ll have to admit though. There was a time when I thought she had the ‘hots’ for you."

"She did but she knew I loved you. How long before you two leave?"

"Whenever I go in and get her. I hadn’t told her we weren’t going."

"Think we could make out for a little while?"

Sarah grinned, "Is that ALL we’re gonna do?"

"Oh, I don’t know….it could get interesting," he answered as he slipped his hand under her shirt and leaned to kiss her.

Before they could go any further though, Nick and then Jesse interrupted the couple. Howie groaned in frustration, gave Sarah a kiss, and watched as she got Jesse ready to go with her shopping.

Part 301       The Dance Index(3)