Part 481
As the door closed behind them, Howie watched as Sarah practically collapsed on the bed. She had one arm across her eyes while she held her stomach. He lay on his side beside her propping his head on his hand. Reaching out, he pushed her hair back.
"Do you hurt?"
"Some. I’ll be okay if I rest."
"I thought you were going to take a nap when you came back?" scolded Howie gently as he wove his fingers with hers.
"I was," she answered defensively, "But when I got back, Nick needed me."
"What happened? Did they have a fight or something?"
"No, nothing like that," said Sarah as she moved her arm so she could look at Howie. "Know how you said Becca was acting strange this morning?"
"Yeah."
"Well, she went to see her landlady this afternoon and took Nick and Garrett."
"Oh wow! I completely forgot that Becca came here to Denver. Makes sense now."
"I hadn’t forgotten but Bec never let on that Denver was a problem for her…not to me anyway. While Nick was there, Mrs. Chambers gave him Becca’s journal."
"And he read it?"
"We both did."
Sarah’s voice dropped to an almost whisper and Howie heard the tremble. All the emotions Sarah had felt during Becca’s self-imposed exile were now resurfacing and he knew his wife. She had held them in while talking to Nick for his sake but now, alone in their room, she could let it go.
What were those feelings? Anger – angry that Becca had been too, in Sarah’s words, chicken-shit to face her problems; angry that Becca hadn’t trusted her or Nick to help her; angry that she had promised Nick that Becca was different from all the others but Becca had trashed Nick’s heart far worse than any of the others; angry that Becca had placed her in the middle once she HAD contacted her. Another emotion; guilt. Sarah had felt so guilty for allowing her own problems to get in the way. Confusion; why hadn’t Becca come to her? Why hadn’t she at least told her where she was going? Frustration. Oh the countless nights of bitter frustration. He remembered watching Sarah stare at the computer screen praying Becca would get on-line and she’d be able to talk to her and then he would have to carry her to bed because she would cry herself to sleep in front of the computer. Frustrated that once Becca HAD gotten on-line, all her emails had bounced back to her. Hurt. All he had to do was close his eyes and he could see the hurt Sarah had felt for Becca imagining what she had gone through having to learn that Andrew had died of AIDS all alone; the hurt she felt watching Nick try to sing ‘More Than That’ without breaking down or when she held him as he cried himself to sleep; the hurt knowing that her best friend, her sister, needed someone to lean on and not being that someone.
Watching her now as her tears spilled forth once more, he remembered his own feelings of anger, hurt, and frustration. He had been so angry with Becca for running out on Sarah and Nick when they both loved her so much; for leaving Sarah when she needed her the most. He too had been frustrated not being able to do more for Nick or help Sarah find Becca. He had even hired a private detective to search but it had turned up nothing. And hurt. Hurt that Becca hadn’t trusted her faith in God or her friends to get her through that horrible time.
He held Sarah now as they both cried for their friends and for release. It was a cleansing of their hearts and souls.
Sarah finally said, "I’ve never seen Nick so upset or so mature. He understands her so much better now."
"Something good came of it then. I’m glad he had you." Howie pulled Sarah tighter to him.
Sarah ran her hands across his arms. "I’m glad I have you."
Howie nuzzled her neck, his beard tickling her neck, and he felt her giggle. Knowing what it did to her, he did it some more.
Laughing, Sarah squirmed in his arms. "Howieeeeeee….that tickles."
"I know," he teased continuing to tickle her.
Sarah squirmed and giggled but didn’t try to get away from him.
"Say ‘You are my master, Howie’ and I’ll stop."
"NO!"
"Say it or I’m gonna start tickling you all over."
"NO!"
Howie rolled her onto her back and began tickling her all over. Sarah squealed and tried to get away from him.
"Say it, Sarah!"
"Okay! Okay!! You are my master, Howie!"
Howie stopped tickling her and dipped in to kiss her. "That’s better! Now how about we go out and see if the other two are ready for dinner."
"What did you have in mind, ‘D’?" asked Sarah as she took his hand that he offered.
"There’s a family place called the ‘Funplex’. It’s got bowling lanes and miniature golf. I thought we could hang out, get some pizza and beer, and bowl a few games."
"’D’, I probably should take it easy since I didn’t rest much."
"That’s why I thought we could do this. You can keep score and be my
‘lady luck’," growled Howie as he hugged her, kissing her on the neck.
"I can do that," laughed Sarah as she turned her head to kiss him.
"I love you, ‘D’!"