Part 64

Sarah walked into the club, her head pounding from the migraine that had started shortly after leaving Becca. She had gone back to the Youth Center and tried to do some work before going to meet Howie but she couldn’t get that hurt look Becca had given her out of her head. Her words kept coming back to her and she was kicking herself for saying anything in the first place. Becca deserved to be happy and Sarah wanted to be happy for her. She couldn’t help being protective of Becca though. Her best friend had had a rough, sheltered life and now she was guilty of sheltering her too.

Howie was in his office looking over the books when Sarah came in. He looked up at her as she closed the door behind her and leaned against it. He could tell she was punishing herself and decided to let her bring up what happened.

"Hey, Angel," he said as she moved across the room to give him a kiss.

"Hey, D," she said softly.

Sarah went to the couch and lay down, shielding her eyes from the light. It was a useless effort because the images that flashed through her mind were just as bad as the light.

"Migraine?"

"Yeah."

"Taken anything for it?"

"No…I can’t."

"Why not?"

"Screws up my system and if we’re going to try to get pregnant, I can’t afford to do that."

Howie moved to the couch and Sarah sat up so he could sit too. She put her head in his lap and he began to play with her hair as he rested his hand on her stomach.

"D, I screwed up today."

"Wanna talk?"

"Yeah. It’s Becca. While we were shopping, a couple girls recognized me and asked about Nick…wanted to know if he had a girlfriend. I looked at Bec and she gave that ‘Don’t you dare tell’ look so I told them no…for her sake. Then, as we left, I asked her if she was really ready for the whole celebrity issue and asked if she’d learned anything from the last five months. She’s still keeping things from Nick."

"Like?"

Sarah opened her eyes and looked up at him. "You know all those fan fics we’ve been reading?"

"Yeah."

"Bec wrote them…while she was in Denver…to pass the time…and she won’t tell Nick."

Howie laughed, "Hell of a way to pass time but that’s NOT the point. Becca said you don’t think she loves Nick."

"When did you talk to her?"

"She came by here earlier. She and Nick were both upset by what you said."

"I never said she didn’t love Nick. I just pointed out that she runs every time things get tough and they needed to be sure of what they were doing this time…especially with a baby on the way. God, Howie, you and I both know how tough it can be and Becca’s NOT strong. She has A LOT of insecurities that are just going to be intensified by being on the road, newly married, and a baby on the way. You wouldn’t even propose until I was able to deal with my problems and it had NOTHING to do with your career."

"Sarah, Becca will never learn to deal with those insecurities if you don’t stop trying to protect her. You hurt her today. I know you didn’t mean to but you did. You and I have GOT to back off and let them make their own mistakes."

"But D…."

"No, Sarah! We were allowed to make our mistakes and learn from them. That’s the ONLY way their gonna get past this. Be there if she needs to talk but otherwise, don’t give UNWANTED advice. She’s NOT you and stop trying to make her you. Nick loves her just the way she is…just like I love you the way you are."

"Okay, so what do I do to apologize?"

"Not sure, Angel. You know her better than anyone. What do you think you should do?"

Sarah closed her eyes again. "I can’t think now. My head hurts too damn much."

"Sit up," said Howie. Sarah did it and he began to rub her shoulders. "You’re shoulders are so tight. This is why you have a migraine."

As Howie’s hands worked their magic, Sarah closed her eyes and focused on his hands. She started to relax but she knew the only way she’d be able to get rid of this completely was to go to sleep.

"D, can we skip dinner and go home?"

"I’m afraid not, Angel," he said softly letting her lean against him. "I need to be here tonight since we’re getting ready to leave town again. Plus, I gave Tito the night off. You can go on home if you want."

"No, I don’t feel like making the hour drive. I’ll just go to sleep here."

"That’s fine." Howie moved so that Sarah could get comfortable on the couch and then knelt down beside her. He brushed her hair back and asked, "Can I get you anything?"

"An ice pack would help," said Sarah weakly.

Howie reached for the phone and called down to the kitchen to get an ice pack for Sarah. While they waited, he turned off the lights for her except for the one on his desk so that there was a little light in the room and sat on the couch beside her. He held her hand in his, stroking it absentmindedly with his thumb as he sang to her softly. When Stephanie brought the ice pack, he placed it carefully on her forehead and then gave her a feathery kiss on the lips.

Whispering to himself, "My sleeping beauty," as he watched her. She had drifted off to sleep rather easily, as was always the case when he sang to her.

Before leaving the office, Howie got his jacket and put it over Sarah then headed out into the club to make sure everything went off without any problems.

Sarah’s migraine had been brought on primarily by her argument with Becca but the fact that she’d been going full tilt for the last week and a half with the benefit and everything else added to it. When she fell asleep on Howie’s couch, that’s where she stayed all evening. Howie returned to his office after the crowd had cleared out and there was only a handful of employees left to find her still sleeping peacefully, his jacket pulled in close to her and the ice pack on the floor.

Raoul had followed Howie up, wanting to see Sarah. He had always been fond of Howie ever since Billy had assigned him as Howie’s bodyguard. He’d seen Howie hurt by a lot of women wanting to be with him only because he was a Backstreet Boy but when Sarah had stepped into his life, Raoul knew she was different. He made a promise to himself then that he’d do whatever it took to watch out for Sarah as well.

"Want me to carry her out to your car?"

"I can get her. You just follow me and lock the doors behind me."

"You know, she’s been around you guys too long."

"Why do you say that?"

"She slept through all the commotion tonight."

Howie smiled, "No, she was just exhausted. I’ve kind of been expecting this for a couple days now."

With that, Howie went to the couch and scooped Sarah up in his arms. Sleepily, she wrapped her arms around his neck and put her head on his shoulder.

Mumbling sleepily, Sarah asked, "Where are we going?"

"I’m taking you home, Angel," and he kissed her softly on the forehead.

"I can walk, D."

"I know but I’ve got you, Angel."

Raoul followed the couple down opening the doors for Howie and locking up behind him. He said good-bye to them and watched as Howie pulled off before heading home himself.

On the drive home, Sarah leaned against Howie and ran her hand lightly along his thigh. She asked softly, "Are you mad at me…about what I said to Becca?"

Howie thought about the question for a minute and then said, "I could never be mad at you for that, Angel. You meant well but you have to realize, Becca’s NOT you and she never will be. Just be her friend and set an example for her, offer her advice, but DO NOT try to make her into you. What about apologizing?"

"I’m just gonna let it go. Becca and I’ve had arguments before and we go on."

"Just how long have you two known each other? There are times when it seems like you’ve been together all your lives, like real sisters."

Sarah laughed at that. "Seven years, when we started college at Florida State and we’ve had some real knock down drag outs but we always manage to get through. Neither one of us had a sister and when her father died, I became her family."

Howie gave her a quick kiss. "You know what’s best for the two of you. Just do me one favor."

"Sure."

"Before you say anything else to Becca about her relationship with Nick, think about what you’re gonna say FIRST, don’t say it in the heat of the moment."

Sarah laughed, "Yes, dear."

The whole time the two had been talking, Sarah had been lightly stroking Howie’s thigh and now he was uncomfortably hard. He put his hand on hers and said, "Sarah, you know what your touch does to me."

Sarah moved her hand up to his lap to feel his hardness and whispered, "I’ll take care of that, if you want me to."

Not waiting for Howie’s answer, Sarah unfastened his belt and his pants, freeing his erection from its prison. She lay down taking him into her mouth and running her tongue around the ridge.

Howie sucked in, "Oh, god…Sarah!"

"Like?" she whispered against his shaft.

"I’d be stupid to say stop…but I have to drive."

"So drive," purred Sarah as she stroked his shaft. She moved back down taking him into her mouth. She worked him like a lollipop, licking and sucking every delicious inch of him.

As Sarah worked her magic on him, Howie had to concentrate very hard on driving. One hand gripped the steering wheel, his knuckles turning white from his grip, while the other ran through her hair, guiding her up and down. Occasionally he would glance down at her as she’d moan, the vibrations of her mouth causing his body to shudder.

"God, Sarah…you’re gonna make me come," he groaned after one particularly lustful moan.

Sarah pulled off long enough to say, "Don’t hold back, D. I want to taste you."

That was all it took for Howie and as she sucked him hard, cradling his balls in her soft hand, he felt the familiar sensation of his own release flow through him. Sarah recognized the familiar signs, erratic breathing, legs and balls tensing, as he began to shoot his load into her mouth.

Somehow, Howie had managed to pull off the side of the road before he came. Now, he let out a moan, "OH, GOD! SARAH!" as he gripped her hair in both his hands and thrust into her.

Sarah sat up and found an old towel to help clean up. She looked at him as he leaned back in his seat, a look of complete satisfaction on his face. Leaning to him, Sarah kissed him lightly on the lips.

"God, that was good, Sarah," said Howie when he could breathe somewhat normally again.

Sarah smiled, "I’ll do anything for you."

He took her into his arms, "I know how hard those months were for us, but I’m glad we went through them."

"Why would you say that now?"

"Because, before all that, you NEVER would have done something like this! It should have come sooner in our relationship."

"D…all you had to do was ask."

Part 65        The Dance Index