One

"Where did Hippo go?" Erin looked around.

"Hip, hip. She'll be back." Rose shrugged. "Hey look at those guys. What in the hell are they wearing?!"

"They're cute, shut up. Where's TARA!?" Erin wrung her hands nervously.

"Tara, Tara. Hippo Hippy Daisy Veg."

"Listen to me! She's GONE!"

"So? Hip hip. Stop spazzing. That guy!! WHAT is that on his HEAD?"

"His hair, dumbass." Erin smacked her.

"Nope! It's a dead squirrel. It's a hippo skin!"

"Don't be morbid! Where's Hippo?? Usually she comes running when someone calls her that. And then there's bloodshed."

"HEY! IF THERE'S SOMEONE NAMED HIPPO THERE'S PEOPLE LOOKING FOR YOU!" A rather drunk Nick bellowed.

"Shut up you idiot!" Kevin punched him. Nick stuck out his tongue at him and repeated his message.

"Hey there's a person over there. Sitting on the bar. There's a hippo on her shirt!" AJ realized, pointing.

"Hippo's over there stupids!" Nick laughed loudly and hiccupped.

"HIPPO! What are you doing?" Rose sauntered over to her.

"DON'T call me hippo!" Tara whacked Rose with her purse.

"But you wear that shirt every day!"

"I DO NOT!" Tara zipped up her coat, pulling her arms out of the sleeves and took off her 'hip hip' shirt, pulling it out of the coat and throwing it at a ceiling fan. "THERE! I do not wear it every day."

"Hey!" Brian caught something blue that came flying at his head. He held it up. It was a shirt that had a light blue hippo decal on it and the words 'hip hip.' "Look at this! I have a shirt! Hee hee! [think All I Have To Give (The Conversation Mix)]"

"I want it!" Nick grabbed at it but Brian held it out of his reach.

"NO! It's mine you whale." Brian pulled the shirt over his head so it was like a collar, sitting on his shoulders with his head through the neck hole and the bottom of it. "Show me the meaning of Nick on a diet...."

"Shut UP you idiots!" Kevin punched Brian and tried to take the shirt. Brian ran off toward the bathrooms, Nick and Kevin following.

"Nick won't be able to catch me, he's weighted down quite a bit." Brian called happily as he went into the women's bathroom.

"Think those guys have been drinking much?" Tara asked sardonically. Rose was laughing hysterically. She noticed a blue Kentucky Wildcats hat sitting neglected on a table and snatched it, stuffing it in her bag.

"Hey! What are you doing? That's Brian's!" AJ glared at the girl over the rim of his beer mug. "Are you going to take your shirt off too?"

"I don't have a coat.." Rose smiled sweetly.

"So?" AJ laughed.

"Hmm.." Rose shrugged. "I'll think about it. But probably not, sorry."

"Get out!! OUT!!! OUT!" Erin cowered against the wall, staring at the three guys that had invaded the bathroom. "Wait! Why...." She noticed that they were fighting over Tara's shirt.

"Hi." Brian waved at her merrily. "My name's Brian but, uh, you can call me B-rok 'cause I'll be rockin yo house! HEE HEE."

"Where'd you get that shirt you pervert?" Erin glared at him.

"Someone threw it at me." Brian grinned.

"Give it! I WANT IT!" Nick whined. "I'm the blonde one! Everybody loves me!" He hiccupped again.

"Shut the hell up!" Kevin tried to drag him out of the bathroom, but Nick pulled his hair and bit his arm. Kevin let go of him and Nick fell on the floor, and stayed there, laughing.

"Slim Fast has 21 essential vitamins and minerals to keep you healthy from the inside out!" Brian yelled and ran out of the bathroom. Nick jumped up and followed him, shrieking. Kevin looked stupidly at the girl washing her hands madly at one of the sinks.

"Get out!!! This is a WOMEN'S bathroom you idiot! Get out of here!" Erin shuddered and got another handful of soap.

"You've washed your hands at least three times now." Kevin observed.

"Do you have a problem with that?" Erin looked down at the water pouring into the sink. "You're drunk, get away from me." Kevin merely shrugged and started washing his hands at the sink next to hers.

"I'm not drunk. Now, the other guys are drunk, but not me!" He said proudly.

"I'm sure." Erin glanced at him warily. "I said get OUT of here! Are you deaf? Or are you a woman?"

"Umm.. what?"

"You're drunk! GO AWAY!!!" she shouted. She frowned nervously at him then washed her hands again.

"Hey, stop that. It's scary." Kevin pulled her away from the sink.

"Stop it! Get away from me!!" She slapped him then shoved him backwards into a stall, slammed the door in his face, and ran out of the bathroom. Kevin stood up dazedly and shook his head. Maybe he was drunk.. He really didn't remember. He walked out of the stall in time to see a woman walking into the bathroom, giving him a very very odd look.

"Umm.. Hi!" He smiled cheerily and walked out.

"We should leave now!" Erin declared as soon as she found Tara and Rose.

"No! We're talking to a freak." Rose gestured at an entity wearing a cowboy hat, a wife-beater, a feather boa, and pants.

"I'm not a freak!" the entity protested. "My name is AJ and I am not a freak." He grinned stupidly. "I'm a rebel! I'm the bad boy!"

"Really? Well I'm a goth," Rose said in a serious tone of voice.

"And I'm a hippie," Tara added.

"She's kinda schizo," Rose said informatively, pointing at Erin.

"Schizo? I am not! I don't think it's safe here. There was a .. umm... A thing in the bathroom. It wouldn't leave me alone."

"Erin? Have you been smoking something?" Tara asked.

"NO! Tara, one of them had your shirt!!!!"

"Oh, yeah. I took it off a minute ago," she said nonchalantly.

"WHAT?!" Erin started massaging her temples. "This is NOT happening! I'm going home! And I'm locking you guys out, okay?! So I hope you remember where I put the spare keys!" She turned on her heel and stomped outside. Tara and Rose looked up interestedly as two either gay or very drunk guys ran past. One was holding Tara's 'hip hip' shirt and laughing maniacally at the other.

"Having trouble keeping up, Nick? Huh? HUH?!" He paused and yanked the shirt over his head. "Hee hee!"

"IT'S MY SHIRT, BRIAN!!!!" his tall blonde friend replied.

"Are they dating?" Rose looked at their new freak friend. "They're so cute together." AJ started laughing.

"My name is AJ," he said between breaths.

"Umm.. Stop laughing, AJ. It's okay.. It wasn't that funny." Tara looked worriedly at the cowboy hat-sporting entity that didn't seem to be able to stop laughing.

"What's your name?" It was the tall blonde gay guy.

"That's Hippo." Rose pointed at Tara, who promptly swung her purse at her again.

"Hippo!!" The blonde one giggled and hiccupped.

"And that's Morticia," Tara added.

"Morticia!!" he repeated.

"That guy was wearing my shirt.." Tara pointed after Brian, who was jumping up and down a few yards away pointing and laughing at his blonde friend. "Is he .. Um.. Are you guys.. together? Ya know?" AJ started laughing again.

"No!!! That's Brian!" he said as though explaining everything. "I'm Nick! I'm the blonde one and I'm the baby and everybody loves me."

"Okay, that's right. Of course you are, honey." Rose smiled complacently. "We love you."

"Hehe, I knew it." Nick giggled again. "I'm a Backstreet Boy! Hehe."

"What..." Rose looked confused.

"A what?" Tara was confused as well.

"A Backstreet Boy!" Nick screamed. He hiccupped.

"SHUT UP YOU IDIOT!" someone yelled. A tall guy walked up to their table. "Where'd that girl go? The one who was washing her hands?"

"Easter!" Tara chirped.

"Oh, so that's her name.." Nick smiled. Everything made sense, for once!

"Egg," Rose added. "Easter Egg.. She went home, so she can lock us out. But we'll get in a window."

"The living room window? Or the one in the kitchen?" Tara wondered.

"Remember, you broke the one in the kitchen. There's plywood on it now. It'll have to be the living room.."

"But what if she's asleep on the couch? She'll spaz!"

"Easter Egg?" Nick repeated.

"Yes. Her name is EASTER EGG!" Tara laughed.

"And you're Hippo!" Brian said happily. "And Nick IS a hippo!!"

"MY NAME IS NOT HIPPO! I'm going to KILL you Rosie."

"Eww. Don't call me Rosie! That's puke-inducing." Rose grimaced.

"Hahaha!! ROSIE!!!" Nick squealed. AJ dumped his drink over Nick's head. Nick screamed and grabbed his head. Brian ran past again and slipped on the beer on the floor, falling and hitting his head on a chair.

"Owww." Brian crossed his eyes and looked at the ceiling.

"What in the hell did that.....thing mean by Backstreet Boy?" Tara asked AJ.

"It's a group we're in." AJ replied knowingly.

"Oh really." Rose coughed. "A group you're in. Like a support group?"

"NO! We sing." AJ banged his fist on the table.

"Ohh. I see." Tara nodded, smiling. "You SING. And it's a group. Are you famous?"

"Hell yes!! We got girls all over the world fighting over us." AJ banged his fist on the table again. He really liked the sound it made.

"Of course you do." Rose glanced at Tara, trying not to laugh.

"I want it that waaayyyy" Brian sang loudly.

"AM I SEXUAL?!" Nick bellowed.

"Yeaaahhhh.." AJ chimed.

"Am I the only one?" Brian was only a little off-key.

"Yeeaaahhh." Nick and AJ said together.

"Um, Rose? Let's go." Tara stood up. Rose nodded and followed her to the door. Brian, AJ, and Nick didn't notice that they had left. As the door shut behind them, Nick looked up.

"Hey! They're leaving!" He got up abruptly and started following them but tripped over Brian.

"Owwwww." Brian frowned at Nick. "Lose some weight or get off my foot, Little Debbie."

"NO! I'm not Little Debbie and I'm not moving!" Nick laughed evilly. Brian whined piteously.

"I want my hat. Keviiiin! Where's my hat?"

"Shut up! SHUT UP! All of you!" Kevin felt he was surrounded by jackasses.

"My hat," Brian repeated meekly.

"Shut up you idiot! I'm Kevin! Shut up, haha." Nick laughed. Kevin tried to kick his head but he moved just in time. A few bodyguards ran in the door.

"What the hell are you guys doing here?!" one of them demanded.

"Jobob, where's my hat?" Brian whimpered.

"SHUT UP!" Kevin repeated.

"Hi Ken!" Nick waved at the other bodyguard from under the table.

"Come on, you guys! You have a concert tomorrow night!" Jobob exclaimed.

"What are you thinking? What if some little girls saw you like this?!" Ken added.

"Why would a little girl be in a bar?" Kevin demanded angrily. "That's just not RIGHT!"

"Come on. We're leaving." Ken dragged Brian to his feet, then Nick.

"NO! Bri has to find his hat." Nick protested.

"My hat! My hat!" Brian was distraught.

"Shut up," Kevin ordered.

"We're leaving. NOW," Jobob announced. And they left.