"Well okay. FINE!" Rose kicked the door and sat on the floor in front of it. Tara screamed for no apparent reason, just to see if anything would happen. Nothing did. Erin crouched in a corner looking terrified. After quite a while, there were voices in the hallway outside the door.
"So they came? They're in there?" AJ pointed to the closed door, looking at Jobob.
"Yeah. I think." Jobob scratched his head. He couldn't remember. Hm. Oh well.
"What do you mean you THINK? Are they or not?" Brian glared at him.
"Uhh.." Jobob shrugged and went away.
"It's okay Jobob. Brian is just a little tense." Howie explained to his retreating figure. Nick tried to open the door, but it was locked.
"DAMNIT! I can't open the DOOR!" Nick punched it. "Ow!! Damnit."
"Are you turning the knob the right way?" Brian wondered.
"YES!" Nick turned the knob the other way. "HAHA!!! See??"
"Are you pushing the door? Cause it only opens if you pull it open." Kevin explained.
"Um.." Nick stopped pushing on the door and pulled it instead. "It still doesn't open!" He started pounding on the door angrily. "LET ME IN!!!!"
"Haha, poor Blondie can't open the door!" Rose yelled.
"Really? Girl Power, Yeah!!! Hey Baby Spice, WE LOCKED IT!!!" Tara shouted.
"What?" Nick was confused. He didn't see Baby Spice anywhere!
"I have your shirt Hippo!!!" Brian called tauntingly through the door.
"Well I have your fucking hat, so shut up!" Rose grinned.
"YOU took my hat!! Damnit!!!" Brian kicked the door.
"Haha. I wonder if they're nicer drunk or sober.. hmm.." Tara took off her shoes and threw one at the door.
"Jobob!! YOU HAVE A KEY!!!" Nick realized in a strange burst of intelligence.
"Shut up you pansy." Kevin commanded. Jobob unlocked the door and they walked in.
"Hey, I thought there were THREE of you." Nick looked confused, as usual.
"Oh, what? THREE? There aren't three of us, right Rose? What's he talking about? You must have been REALLY drunk last night, man..." Tara shrugged. Erin was hiding behind a couch in a corner.
"There's a girl in my dressing room!" Aaron had snuck out down the hallway when he'd heard Nick and his friends.
"Aaron, get OUT of here!" AJ yelled.
"What?" Erin peered over the back of the couch.
"There ARE three of you!" Brian said happily.
"Shut up." Kevin grumbled half-heartedly.
"Brian, why are you being such a bitch?" AJ wondered.
"In the words of Kevin, shut up." Brian said dramatically.
"You are all barking mad!" Tara declared.
"Heehee, barking mad!" Howie giggled.
"Please contain yourself." Rose requested. "Tara! Did you hear me? I said PLEASE! I never say please."
"Good job Rosie!" Tara wondered where her shoes had gone.
"What did you think of the concert?" Nick asked.
"Gag me with a pitchfork." Rose said calmly.
"NO!! A serrated steak knife." Tara nodded.
"A cleaver!" Erin called.
"Really, I hardly thought it was worthy of a plastic spork." Rose confessed.
"Shut the hell up! We sing better than YOU." Kevin was disgusted.
"You don't know that! I was on BROADWAY." Tara nodded proudly.
"Oh bull shit." Kevin glared at her.
"I WAS! Don't you DARE say I wasn't because I was you greasy old pedophile!" Tara frowned. "Yes, I saw you looking at those eight year olds!"
"Peda what?" Nick wondered.
"Oops, you know, we can't use big words around Nicky here." AJ explained.
"NOW you tell me." Tara shook her head. "And I thought he was only like that when he's drunk."
"Just shut up," Kevin repeated.
"You need a better vocabulary, Kevin," Rose informed him. "Shut up shut up shut up shut up, and don't forget shut the hell up, are the only phrases you know. Or so it seems."
"Yeah, why don't you try to be creative," Tara suggested.
"SHUT-" Kevin glared.
"Please contain yourself. Try that one. Always say please," Rose advised wisely.
"Greasy old pedophile," Tara repeated gleefully, watching Kevin twitch with anger. "Hey, where's my sister?"
"She's off raping that little blonde fly," Rose said dismissively.
"WHAT?!" Nick demanded. "My mom's going to KILL me!"
"Don't worry. She'll pass out again soon." Aaron ran screaming into the room again. He threw himself at Nick and latched his arms around Nick's knees.
"NICK!!!! Help me! Save me!" He whimpered. Shayna was close behind.
"Aaron, come back!" she pleaded. "Aaron, I love you! .." She looked around surprisedly <- not a word. "HOWIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" she shrieked, and passed out right away.
"Wow, Howie has a fan," AJ muttered. Howie pretended he hadn't heard.
"Wow, she loves me." He smiled happily.
"Little blonde fly, you're safe. I think she's out cold." Tara smiled.
"What did you call me?!"
"To spare confusion.. There's another person with a name kind of like yours. I know this is really confusing to you, but trust me; it's easier when there's one Erin and one blonde fly instead of two Aarons. Okay?"
"Nick, I don't LIKE her!"
"Oh... This is your shirt." Brian offered a blue t-shirt to Tara.
"NO way! It's MINE!" Nick snatched it. Brian glared at him. "Fine fine fine.." Nick handed the shirt to Tara.
"Now you have to give me my hat."
"First, my shoes," Tara said.
"What? What shoes?"
"I know you have them! I took them off and now they're gone! It was either you or Kevin," she decided.
"Why Kevin?" Brian wondered.
"Because Kevin spent the most time in the women's bathroom and also he's mad at me. Because I told him he was a greasy old pedophile."
"This sucks," Rose informed all of them. "I'm leaving. Hippo, you're responsible for your ...sister. Bye everyone." She started walking out of the room.
"Me too!" Erin jumped up. "Time to go. Now."
"Easter Egg!" Nick recalled. Erin froze.
"What?"
"Um, Easter Egg?" Erin looked venomously at Nick, then Rose and Tara. She smacked Nick and walked out. Rose shrugged and followed her.
"I guess I should follow them..." Tara looked at Shayna. "Naa, they'll be fine.. I just don't want to go home and babysit.. that.. girl." She watched Shayna distastefully. "But Erin and Rose are going to kill me.."
"Okay." AJ smiled. "JOBOB!!!! Don't let them leave. Please?"
"I dunno.." Jobob was doubtful. Those people seemed a little too eccentric and he didn't want to risk making them angry. They might kill him. Nick ran after them.
"Where the hell are my shoes?" Tara asked irritably. She noticed that AJ was looking at her evilly and walking around unsteadily, his feet crammed into a pair of beaded hemp sandals. "You are all drunk, high, and gay."
"SHUT UP!!" Kevin pushed AJ over.
"Please contain yourself! Hee hee hee!" Howie giggled.
"Don't leave!" Nick pleaded, catching up to Erin and Rose. "Easter!!!!"
"You bastard don't CALL me that." Erin smacked him again. "My name is ERIN."
"Really? My brother's name is Aaron too! WOW!" Nick grinned stupidly.
"Your brother belongs splattered across a windshield." Rose said thoughtfully.
"What?" Nick was confused.
"Like a bug." Rose clarified slowly.
"Ohhh! I get it!! No! Aaron isn't a bug!" Nick glared at her.
"Someone's been passing out crack." Erin stated. "Was it the one with the boa?"
"What?" Nick didn't remember that AJ had been wearing a feather boa. Oh well.. Poor Nick.
"What is going on over there?!" Rose looked interestedly up the hallway. "I think Kevin's about to kill somebody."
"Maybe he'll step on that little blonde thing," Erin mused. "Rose, you SAID we were leaving. Now let's go." She proceeded to drag Rose down the hallway. "Tara! We're LEAVING!" she yelled.
"NO!! I want my HAT!" Brian yelled. Rose and Erin started walking faster.
"Morticia!" Nick called.
"Little Debbie!" Rose retorted.
"Baby Spice!" Tara yelled.
"Hippo!" Nick yelled. Howie looked around furtively. Everyone seemed fairly distracted and the little blonde teenybopper was still unconscious. He'd never seen anyone pass out because of him before. It made him feel warm and fuzzy inside and stuff like that. He smiled serenely then picked up the blonde teenie and threw her over his shoulder. No one seemed to notice. Howie chuckled and started sprinting down the hallway. Tara looked at him and blinked.
"Where is that troll going with my sister? He can't have her. She's a minor!"
"Somehow, I doubt that's ever stopped a Backstreet Boy," Rose mused.
"SHUT UP!" Kevin yelled. "HOWIE, you pansy! Git back heeyeer!!" Howie looked behind him and smirked, then kept running. Tara shook her head.
"My mom is going to be so pissed...." She tried not to smile. But it was funny! "Where's he going?"
"Hey Howie!" Brian yelled futilely. "Come back! That's Tara's sister!"
"Nah, he can have her. It's okay." Tara shrugged.
"PAY ATTENTION TO MEEEE!" Aaron jumped up and down a few times, then did a cartwheel. No one even looked at him, so he decided to do some more cartwheels, forgetting there was a wall directly in front of him. *THUD*
"What was that?" Tara looked around.
"AARON! Are you okay?" Nick ran over to his little brother, who was lying on the floor.
"Uhhhh." Aaron moaned and rubbed his head.
"The little blonde fly smashed himself! He didn't need anyone to do it for him! Now that takes talent." Rose wandered back down the hallway to where the majority of them were congregating. Erin followed her reluctantly. "The troll's gone."
"Hm. Well I'm sure Shayna will be great company. All she does is shriek and talk about her obsessions, it'll bore him do death if he doesn't go deaf first." Tara glared at AJ. "Give me my shoes you transvestite!"
"Tran.. tranve.. WHAT?" Nick was getting a headache. These people had far too complicated vocabularies for his taste.
"TRANSVESTITE." Tara repeated. "Look it up."
"I'm not a transvestite!" AJ protested.
"Sure. Why are you wearing my shoes?"
"You took them off." AJ grinned stupidly. Tara looked around for a discarded pair of shoes. She saw a pair of fuzzy black platform slippers lying dejectedly on the floor, and went to go steal them. They had the word 'Rebel' written in pretty scripty letters over the toes in red, and there were red embroidered flames around the heels.
"Would these happen to be yours?" She held them up distastefully.
"Those are my favorite slippers. GIVE THEM BACK!" AJ shouted.
"I don't want them!" Tara looked for a window but couldn't find one. "Maybe Shayna would like them."
"Forget it. Shayna's gone..." Rose wondered where Howie had gone and if he would return.
"Shayna would probably like Howie's purple Princess slippers better," Nick said knowingly.
"SHUT UP! No one is supposed to know about those!" Kevin ordered.
"Fine, then. I won't say ANYTHING about Kevy's pink Hottie slippers!" Nick chattered. Kevin growled. "Or Brian's white Angel slippers. Or ..." He decided no one needed to know about his yellow fuzzy 'Baby' slippers. They'd been presents from a really crazed fan that for some reason didn't get thrown away. There were matching bathrobes.
"Shut up, Nick. My slippers are VERY manly!" Kevin declared.
"You mean it's not a joke?" Rose started laughing. "Hottie." She wondered where they'd gotten those slippers.
"Shayna has purple Princess slippers!" Tara realized. "She has a matching bathrobe. It's really disgusting."
"Wow! So does Howie!" Nick looked at Kevin and laughed. Kevin looked murderous.
"Nick, shut up."
"Oh, no. Someone call the witness protection program..." Brian knew that expression. This was when Kevin would break out the hockey stick and start swinging madly, judging by the last few weeks.
"I'm worried about Shayna. Where would Ginger Spice go if he didn't want to be found?" Tara asked.
"Who's Ginger Spice?" Nick wondered.
"Howie, you idiot." AJ smacked his head.
"I'm going to KILL Howie..." Kevin grumbled.
"Oh no. Posh is PMSing." Rose watched his face darken. "Midol, Kevy. Because your period is more than a pain."
"Careful, Rose. I think he's going to have an aneurism..." Tara watched as Kevin stomped into his dressing room and slammed the door.
"Please explain." Brian looked at Rose expectantly.
"Okay... As you all know, Blondie over there is Baby Spice. And the PMS Avenger would be Posh... Rebel is Scary Spice, or he wants to be. And Howie is Ginger. And you, my friend, are Sporty Spice."
"It all makes sense now!" Nick said amiably.
"You retard." AJ glared at Nick. He would never learn.
"Scary Spice," Nick retorted. He started thinking. Now he knew why someone had thrown the 'Baby' slippers at him.
"My sister." Tara reminded everyone impatiently.
"To the batcave!" Brian started marching down the hallway.
"Um." Tara looked scared.
"He means the busses, silly B-rok!" Nick skipped away after him.
"They're gay!" Rose said cheerily, following them. Tara shuffled off down the hallway, wearing AJ's Rebel slippers, and he followed her, still occupying the hemp sandals. Erin watched them leave, leaning against the wall.