When
I was asked to write The Loud Pipes Bio my first question was “Who?”
I was handed a tape and told to “write about this.” the tape
turned out to be a mix tape of some old AC/DC songs and some stuff that
I’d rather not mention.
The band is on a first name basis only, (something about warrants and
back child support) Jesse on lead guitar and backing vocals, Roxie on
bass, Joe on drums, Chris smoking cigarettes and playing rhythm guitar
and backing vocals when Jesse’s off beating his guitar to a pulp
and They're new singer who remains nameless. The members brought together
by a mutual love of Pabst in a can and really nothing else decided they
wanted to play music that didn’t suck (something they seem to think
they have done) and to play music that they like since no one else is.
The Loud Pipes have gained quite a reputation for themselves in the
short time they have been together. When asked about The Loud Pipes
the guy that lives in the Dumpster outside their studio mumbled something
about Nixon and asked me for a dollar. Backstage of MTV’s TRL host
Carson Daly was quoted as saying, “I wouldn’t play these guys
even if they had a @#!!*@ Video.”
And recently at the Viper Room in L.A Marilyn Mason asked the band if
they had any pills.
With endorsements like these the Loud Pipes are sure to disgust parents
and small farm animals alike. With songs like the catchy Jenny Won’t
GO, Reed Neck and the desperate plea in Stacy Won’t you Keep your
Legs Closed, The Loud Pipes have left audiences asking for ear plugs
and in some cities an explanation of what just happened, and could they
have their money back.
The Loud Pipes figure they have to tour at least 20 weeks to pay off
their gambling debts and title loans be sure to catch them at a state
fair near you.
These guys are great; they make no promises, play great catchy music
and are not out to change the world. To sum the Loud Pipes up in one
sentence…”I want the 5 bucks you promised.”
Cleothious Pandersnatch
