Halloween was fast approaching in Dragon World, and everybody was getting ready for the big day. Gohan planned to be a Namekian for Halloween(go figure), Bulma was getting Trunks ready for his first Halloween, Goku was looking forward to the candy, Piccolo decided to go meditate at that big ol’ gnarly waterfall, and Vegeta was in a bad mood as usual. But someone else was also planning for a very special Halloween scare.
On the morning of Halloween day, Goku woke up and got out of bed. Since he snored, ChiChi usually slept in another room. He groggily dragged himself to the mirror. On it was a small yellow post-it-note. He hadn’t totally woken up yet, and he never could read that well, so it took him a while to read the four-letter word on the post-it-note. First he saw a D…I…E…..T!!!! He screamed. Everywhere he looked, he saw the post-it-notes bearing the word DIET. He ran down to the kitchen, screaming at the top of his lungs. When he got to the breakfast table, his worst fears were confirmed. There, on his plate, was a lone rice cake.
Gohan slowly got out of bed. What was Dad yelling about now? He slowly went over to his closet to get dressed. When he opened the door, his screams mingled with those of his father’s. All his Namekian clothes were gone! When his stopped screaming, he noticed the little note on one of the empty hangers. It read,
Kid:
I took your clothes back. Don’t want a loser like you running around looking like me!
Piccolo
Gohan’s eyes popped. Then, he managed to force out a weak laugh. Piccolo has a weird sense of humor, he thought. This is probably just a joke. Still in his PJ’s, he went to join his parents at the breakfast table. His mom and dad were sitting there. “Don’t worry, sweetie, I’m not putting you on a diet. You must have had a bad dream.” His mother said to Goku. Goku looked unbelievably relieved. At Gohan’s place at the breakfast table, there was a large package. As he tore off the paper, his eyes bugged out once again. There, in the package, were textbooks. ChiChi was elated. “Advanced Calculus, Shakespeare, Biology, this is great! Read the card, sweetie!”
Gohan slowly and warily opened the card. Inside there was a little message.
Kid:
Hope you like the textbooks, loser!
Piccolo
Behind the bushes, a person wearing black laughed an evil laugh. It was a good thing that the Son family didn’t have door locks, she noted. Now, they should be noticing the changes at the Briefs house…
Bulma ran through her house. She frantically pulled opened closets and drawers. She had looked everywhere and still couldn’t find them. Where were they? “VEGETA!!!!!!!” she screamed. A few minutes later, Vegeta came into her bathroom. He was not a morning person. It was 9:00 AM, and he was still in his PJ’s. It’s sort of hard to imagine Vegeta with bed head, but try your hardest. He would have looked almost comical, if not for the horrible scowl on his face. “Yeh, wht’s th’ prblem?” he grunted. “Oh, Vegeta, I never could understand you in the morning. Anyways, I can’t find any of my hair care products? Do you know where they are?” Bulma said. Vegeta’s scowl turned even nastier. “I haven’t now make me breakfast or I’ll blast you into the next dimension!” Bulma sighed and went to make breakfast.
Vegeta was in his training clothes and going off to the training room. He turned the gravity up and started some one-finger push-ups. All was going well until…”EEEEEEEEK!!! NO!!!!! VEGETA HELP ME!!!!! IT’S CELL!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOooooo…” SUCK…SUCK… Vegeta’s eyes widened. His mouth was opened in horror. He ran screaming from the room. “GohankilledhimGohankilledhim NOOOOOOO!!!! BULMA!!!!!!! He was obviously too busy to note the little tape recorder in the corner of his room. It was on….
Vegeta was sitting in the kitchen, sulking. Bulma was laughing her head off. “I can’t believe that you actually thought that Cell was here! Hahahahahaha!”
“Quiet woman! Stop that or I’ll blast you into the next dimension!”
“Oh come on Vegeta, you’d never kill the woman you love.
“Love?”
“Oh, stop it, Veggie-chan.”
“Don’t call me that!”
That person wearing black laughed again, an evil laugh that rivaled Vegeta’s. It was very good that they didn’t notice her sneaking in to put the tape recorder in the training room. Now, to Master Roshi’s…
Krillan was waking up. He felt something on his head as soon as he woke up. Did he fall asleep with his hat on again? No, it was…hair! “18!!! 18!!! I grew hair!!!!” he screamed, running down to the breakfast table. His wife looked up at him from her morning paper. “That’s great honey!” she said. Then, she started to laugh.
“Hey, what’s so funny?” an annoyed Krillan said.
“Look in the mirror!” 18 said through her tears of laughter. Krillan went to he bathroom. Yes, that was hair on his head, all right. But there was something about it. It was…an afro!!!! Krillan screamed.
That person in black was laughing some more. That heavy-duty glue sure came in handy. Now, one last trick to play…
Yamcha was at his apartment, crying. “She used to go out with me every Halloween. We’d walk around town, laughing…but now she goes out with that homicidal freak Vegeta!” he sobbed. Puar sighed. Yamcha had never gotten over losing Bulma. “Oh come on Yamcha. You do this every holiday. Christmas, Easter, even Groundhog Day! Get over Bulma already!” Yamcha hadn’t even heard. “Well, we got some mail.” Yamcha opened the letter. Inside it said:
Yamcha:
I kiled you before, I’ll do it again. You still have your eyes on my Bulma. I know it. Die…
All my love, Vegeta
P. S. I’m watching you.
Yamcha screamed.
“OhKameohKamehesgoingtokillme!!!! Puar! Lock the doors! Better yet, bar them! Then bar the windows! Now!” Puar was confused. She floated over to read the letter. “This isn’t Vegeta’s handwriting! Plus, there are 2 L’s in killed. He has impeccable spelling, remember? This definitely isn’t from him.” Yamcha blushed. “Yeah, I knew that, I was just trying to fool you. Yeah, that’s it.”
The person in black was angry. “That’s the last time I take spelling tips from Ann.” She muttered. “She never could spell, and never will. And, I really gotta work on improving my handwriting. Well I guess I should reveal the secret.”
Gohan picked up the new letter on his front doorstep. “It better not be from Piccolo.” He said. Inside there was a small piece of paper. It said:
Come to the Satan City Park if you wish to know the secret…
Gohan dropped the letter and flew off.
When he got to the park, the first thing that he saw was Piccolo. “Hey Piccolo, why’d you take all my Namek clothes and give me those books?” The Namek looked puzzled. “I never did any of that stuff! I got a weird letter telling me to come here.” Then, Gohan saw Vegeta, Krillan, and Yamcha flying in. Bulma followed in her helicopter. After they all landed, Goku come flying in. Vegeta looked around. “So where is this “secret?” I want to find out who destroyed my saiyan pride in such a despicable way!” Goku looked confused. “What’s despicable mean? I saw that little note and…I’m hungry!” “And who glued that wig on my head?” “And who wrote me that death letter?” “And who hid all my hair stuff?” Then, the figure in black emerged from the bushes. “Oh, you’ll all find out soon enough.” Everybody gasped. Finally, Goku managed to squeak out a couple of words. “Who are you? Did you write that letter? Did you put up those post-it notes? Can you make me lunch?” She smirked out of the left side of her mouth, imitating Vegeta. “I TOLD you, you’ll find out soon-“ “Wait! I know who that is! The only two people who can do a smirk that evil are me and…Empress Sun!”
The figure in black threw off her hooded cloak. An annoyed look crossed her face. “Aw, jeez, I was gonna keep ya losers guessing for a few more minutes! Oh well, I am Empress Sun, and I DID do alla that weird stuff to you guys. Just some harmless Halloween pranks!! Heh..heh..” Everybody looked mad. Vegeta was gathering energy in the palm of his hand.
Empress Sun backed away from the angry crowd. “ooh, great, I am really going to get it… Hey! We’ve all got to go get ready for trick-or-treating! Hey, can I go with you guys? Pulleeeeeeeze? PPUULLLEEEEEEEZZEE????” Bulma looked happy. “Thanks for reminding me! Oh, yeah, you can go with us! I don’t mind a bit!” “Great!” said Empress Sun. She turned to Vegeta. “Hey, Veggie Boy, whatcha going as? A giant vegetable? A carrot perhaps?” She immediately hid behind Bulma. “OhsavemesavemeIknowhesgoingtokillmewithhismightysaiyanpowerspleeeeeeease!!!” Bulma laughed. “Chill out, kiddo! I’m not going to let him kill you.” “I am almost 12 and a half! Not a kid!!” said Empress Sun. “I sorry, Vegeta, but I just can’t resist the occasional vegtable joke. You know me.” A disgusted look crossed the prince face. “Unfortunately, yes. Now let’s get going.”
Gohan, Empress Sun, and Bulma carrying Trunks walked up to the doorstep of the house and rang the doorbell. A tall man opened the door. “Trick or treat!” they said in unison. The man scratched his head and went inside his house. He came back to the door with a box of plain number 2 pencils. “Now, only take one. No pushing.” said the man. All three looked irritated. They put the pencils in their bags and went back. Empress Sun went up to Vegeta and said, “Vegeta! That loser gave us pencils. Could you blast him into oblivion for me? Pleeeeeeeaze!!!” A little smile crossed Vegeta’s face. “With pleasure.” The saiyan said. He cracked his knuckles and was walking up to the door when… “Vegeta! Don’t crack your knuckles or you’ll get arthritis!” Yup, it was Bulma. “Shut up, woman! Saiyans do not get that stupid Earthling affliction!” “Oh yeah? How do you know? None of you ever lived long enough to get it because you always went out looking for a fight!” “Well, we were rarely defeated!” And the sound of the couple’s bickering echoed throughout the night.
The End
Thanx to Underware, Vegetables, and Japanese Dishes for giving me the idea for this with “Top ten ways to scare Vegeta.” I’ll admit I got the tape recorder thing from that. And some loser actually DID give me a pencil last Halloween! Milk Duds to him!
P.S.- If you strongly care about the messed up timeline, feel free to email me at: nobodycares@yousuckmold.com . Thank you for your consideration.
P.P.S. If you hated my story, please email the above address.
