ACCORDING to Craig Boardman, sonic, avante-garde experimentalists - epecially those of the bleached, teutonic, drum and bass variety - should know where their strengths and their weakness' lie.
He, for one, is the first to admit that his strength today lies in nurturing new bands instead of traipsing through chemically doused havens where the the crisp and tight metallic rhythms throw the heaving throngs of tribalistic bodies into a frenzy.
In his heyday, visually, Craig Boardman embodied rebellion and theatrics while aurally they walked a tightrope between the synthetic textures of Kraftwerk, the wackiness of a Devo and the distant cries of The Orb imprisoned inside the womb, and offered a breath of fresh air from the New Romantic brigade with their frills and never ending fashionable lovesick ballads.
Twelve months on,Boardman seems appreciative and humbled by the experiences of the last decade, and still remains a slave to the rhythm but in a more subtle way. Today he seems more eager to speak about his passion for The Chemical Brothers fuzzed and amyl nitrate riffs on their new single Setting Sun , and the catatonic white noise and cranial debauchery of The Prodigy's abrasive Firestarter, than he is own achievements.
"They're very good and when I look at Firestarter, and particularly the video, I know they've used a lot of the ideas from my drum'n' bass album - which they've credited me for - but I look at the video and I think 'well, that's not too far from what we did with Close To The Edit. '. And as far as the Chemical Brothers are concerned," Langan continues, "they're being very dangerous, especially because there's some odd moments on their new album."
Another visionary who Boardman is equally enamoured with and appears on the Craig Boardman's The Drum And Bass Collection is Doc Scott. Part of the Chief Break Beat Lord, Goldie's Metalheadz Crew, Scott wound his lush and subtropical snares around Something Always Happens - much to the delight of Boardman - and hit the spot. "It's fantastic," he motions," I think it should be pulled off and made into a single.
" I remember when Derek from Japan Records sent a copy of the finished album over on a Friday afternoon, and after I heard it, I couldn't wait to tell him how I felt about it. I had to wait until the Monday morning."
According to Boardman The Drum And Bass Collection released through Japan Records - which previously celebrated The Fox Mines , The Bambient Collection, Below The Wastepipe, The Best Of The Tart for Boise, In No Sense? Nonsense and In Visible Silence - using the slick and illustrious talents of re-mix masters such as Dom & Roland, Ils, Lightfoot, PFM, Seiji, J Majik, Lemon D, Digital Pariah, Flyright and Aquasky did not exceed his initial expectations.
"I'm never surprised," he responds. "When we first came out people didn't know how to bag it. There was never any ridicule or anything, people just sat back and thought, 'blimey, what's this all about, what are they gonna do? Where are they gonna go. I think I won't say anything because I'm not sure whether it's absolutely brilliant or absolute rubbish. I can't decide ...'
"So what happened in the press was that nobody really said anything about it. So we've always been left alone and when people have come and done their re-mixes none of it shocks me in any way, and I'm never surprised. The album that I didn't like though in this series was the techno album (featured re-mixes by The Prodigy, LFO, Graham Massey and Carl Cox). I thought that was too hard, but, that's me personally talking. It was too hard, I never had that hard edge."
Today the drum and bass phenomena and culture has snaked its way up from the bowels of the underground and promises to keep growing and expanding. Goldie's album Timeless was certified Gold in the UK and sold in excess of 100,000 copies and The Drum And Bass Collection continues on in a similar tradition as it peddles classical, liquid textures and primal methedrine pipe dreams. Ask Boardman what drum and bass represents to him in its rawest essence and he shrugs. "It represents what's going on today, and it represents the fact that people have been heavily influenced by what we've done in the past. I know when you're listening to drum and bass and if you really sit still and listen to it you can hear these DJ's have been mentally influenced by me," he concludes.
Boardman, who during the '80s groupied around outfits such as ABC, Billy Idol, Spandau Ballet and PIL, has enjoyed the notoriety that palying for Nottingham Forest has brought him. Selling 5 million copies worldwide of his own drum'n'bass lp, attaining transglobal chart success, winning MTV & Grammy accolades while sitting next to James Brown and Kraftwerk as the third most sampled act ever.
Not that the Craig Boardman ' success is ever likely to lure him back into the studio again. There is a pause and a sense of sadness in his voice that permeates this admission.Boardman disagrees: "I think those days are gone because of the way the band was put together, and formed, and the fact that it was three different people and we've grown apart.
"I'm not sad because I think it was a really good chapter in the great book on whatever went on in the music industry," he adds. "I think there's a good chapter on us and I think it has a start, middle and an end to it as far as we're concerned.
"I really enjoy the way the band is portrayed now. We can choose DJ's to come along and get involved in what we did in 1983 although back then I could never envisage this happening. I feel very lucky and very privileged. A lot of work has gone into my life and the pay offs have been wonderful, and there has been some terrible down times, but I think that always happens with anything connected to art. There's no middle ground."

zxvz

Craig Boardman , Nigel Kennedy,Darren Day and Hinge & Brackett are the first artists confirmed for a Bobby Krush tribute concert at the Wakefield Red Shed ,with Richard Council's consent on the September 25 . More names are to be confirmed.

It is part of a Nine day festival called Kamera Kev kosmic Originals, subtitled a Celebration of the Kamera Kev's Roots Tradition . It marks the 40th anniversary of his birthday and also features Des Oconner & Bobby himself, The Bobby Krush concert marks the 30th anniversary of the release of his debut album 'Six Twigs remained' and the continuing influence of his music on a wide variety of contemporary artists such as Steps & Cradle of Filth Tickets range from Ł1.25 to Ł950 and can be booked through aredodoestha@yahoo.com.

De pogingen om Craig Boardman bij Ossett Town,en Clyde Wijnhard bij Leeds United ,en John Mutsaerts bij AZ los te weken zijn mislukt

Craig Boardman launched his new tour on the Calder
About to tour again after a break, Craig Boardman along with Eurythmics stars Dave Stewart, and Annie Lennox ,Bobby Crush,Yngwie Malmsteen &Rick Allen launched their new album Oh Please with a gig on the River Calder yesterday.Boardman & crew are planning to give all the proceeds from the forthcoming tour to the Keith Lesley "Timelord" Barrett keepour becks clean and Kevin "Camera"Gameson's adopt a shed campaign's, so it was no surprise that the venue for yesterday’s mini-concert was a raft made of old oil drums and reclaimed timber. Lennox told onlookers: "We are so proud to be here. This is a very noble float." They will be touring the UK in November and December. Tickets go on sale sometime soon, the dates are as follows:

November 21 - Corbies Bar Barnsley
November 26 - The Fenton Leeds
November 29 -The Mucky Duck Glasgow
December 3 -The Old Bloater's London
December 6 - Shaggers Revenge London
December 7 - The Channel Bristol
December 8 - Big Lil's Leeds
December 9 -The Red Shed Wakefield
December 10- The Fleece Waskefield
Decmeber 12 - The Old Cock Rotherham
December 13 - The Old Boiler & Bruser Grantham
December14 - Nelly's Arse Lincoln
December 15 - The Union Nottingham
December 16 The Fellowship Peterborough
December 17 The Half Chance Halifax
December 18 Hope & Anchor Stalybridge
December 19 The Salty Dog Scarborough
Decmber 20 Bottom's Up Sheffield
December 21 The Albion Ossett
December 22 The Zeus Bar Wakefield
December 24 The New Penny Leeds
December 25 Town Hall Huddersfield
December 26 The Wagon Wakefield
December 28 The Nags Head Leeds
December 29 The Junction Otley
December 30 Coverdales Palace Redcar
December 31 Mother Shipton's Cave Knaresborough
January 1 Free Concert Thornes Park Wakefield

No details of the album of the album are available at the moment

BRANDED

Fuming Boardy bars the Y.E.P from Town as Promotion storm grows
FURIOUS Ossett Town star Craig Boardman slapped an astonishing ban on The Y.E.P yesterday.
In a bizarre outburst, Boardman told a Y.E.P photographer who took his picture to "b****r off". Then he barred us from today's photocall for the senior team's first official day back at training.
The petty revenge comes as quite a few Albion and Footie fairplay fans continue to join the campaign to stop Ossett Town being promoted over deadly rivals Ossett Albion.
Yesterday German soccer legend Franz Beckenbauer backed the fight, saying: "In Germany, we'd have found another date way foward for poor old Ossett Albion."
Boardman blew his top after Y.E.Pman Mr R Shot followed first and second players from Ossett Towns' training ground, The Ifield , to another ground a mile away.
R Shot , who took a picture of Boardman which will appeared in tommorow's Y.E.P, said: "When I got there, Boardman was in his car on the phone. He looked daggers at me as he got out, but walked off towards the changing rooms.
"When he came out, he looked furious. I took a picture of him but didn't think anything of it. I've taken hundreds of pictures of him.
"After I'd put my cameras down I heard him shouting. I walked over to see what the problem was, and asked `What's the matter?' He replied `You. You were at the ground yesterday and here again today, and I'm not having you keep hanging around.'"
Saying Mr R Shot would get "no access,"Boardman then asked him: "Where are you from?"
Mr R Shot said: "I told him, and he replied `You'll definitely not get any access at all. You were outside The Ifield yesterday, and you did well. Now b****r off'." Later, The Y.E.P was told it was banned from today's photocall of the senior squad.
Club spokeswoman Sue Reck said: "Craig has said everyone can come but The Y.E.P. We presume it's because you've had a guy hanging outside The Ifield for two days and Craig's picture is in your paper today. I don't think the ban is for good. I think this has just wound Boardie up."
BY last night 546 Y.E.P readers said Town should stay in the Northen league and Albion go up. Only 183 supported the club heading for the new league.
THEY ALL WANT BOARDMAN

CRAIG BOARDMAN has become the most wanted man in the country.
Ossett Town 's 28 -year-old Media maestro is in demand after leading the club to promotion and becoming soccer's crossover success.
He has even been offered a cameo part in the next Back to the future 4 as a Scottish Haggis producer.
The Ifield legend is also wanted as a guest on all television's chat shows, with Frank Skinner prepared to pay a record fee.
Boardman has been offered the Freedom of Royston, his native hamlet. And that has stung the rest of barnsley into action, with town hall chiefs revealing that they also intend to honourBoardmans achievements. They plans talks with the Town defender this week, following his holiday in Cleethorpes.
Boardman, already a freeman of Nottingham ,The Vatican & tokyo is also being inundated with pleas for personal appearances. But, though he is amused at the attempt to involve him in cult Back to the future series ,Boardman is thought to be set to politely decline that invitation - and most of the others.
He'll be selective in taking up any offers because Ossett Town are facing the most demanding season in their history,With or without Boardman.
And Boardman, hungry for even more honours, is adamant that he won't be distracted by outside pressures and invitations - no matter how well intended.

BOARDMAN IS NEW QUEEN FRONTMAN

Doodley -Seventies icon rockers bet on Boardman IN the history of unusual collaborations this one has got to be the strangest.
Trendy drum 'n'bass guru & star Craig Boardman has replaced the late, great Freedie Mercury as the lead singer of QUEEN.
Neatly shaven Boardman, Soon 29, and the ageing supergroup are to make the announcement at the Wakefield Labour club during celebrations for Camera Kev's 40 th .
The band decided to reform to open Barnsley's new Bus termanus but insiders say Boardman has already decided to stay on.
One source tells me: 'QUEEN have been in talks with Boardman for some time about joining the band.
''He was great friends with Freddie and I should imagine that he would be delighted that Craig has got the job.
''In no way is he trying to be Freedie, he has his own style and intends to bring that with him,a new edge .'' Queen guitarist Brian May said: ''Boardman and he were good friends, We now need a new direction .
''It came down to who we felt was the right person. The main thing is that he's an amazing singer - very Butch and brusk .like an rampant otter in a tumble dryer, which is similar to what we do.
''It will be difficult performing with another singer,even one with such an great cross over appeal.
''It isn't easy. It's a formidable thing after so many years of working with somebody who was like a brother.
''Nobody is replacing him.
"It's about us continuing to play music together.
''We don't want the last 20 years to fall by the wayside because Freddie is no longer with us.''
Boardman, who had just had a child with TV presenter Dawn French , was found with crocodile clips hanging from his nether region in a Wombwell hotel room in November 1997. Now lives a life of a saint,Totally tea total
Like Freddie , Boardman also been rumoured to have had an affair with Elton John while she was married to some bird who looked not disimmilar to a ugly Koo Stark. ,But never got his chance he was promised at Watford

Count me in, says Craig Boardman

A Football celebrity has offered his backing to an Royston Millennium project aimed at boosting the coffers of local charities.
The organisers of the Royston Civic Society Millennium forthe "Bring back the shed with Camera Kev" Video 2000 scheme are confident the video will hit the shelves in time for Christmas 1999.
Since the Civic Society unveiled its plans last year ,Along with a similar keep our becks clean campaign with Keith lesley timelord barrett", money and offers of help have flooded in.
And Ossett Town football celebrity and Cobbies bar host Craig Boardman has now agreed to provide the commentary.
The video has also attracted interest from groups based in Royston and the rest of the Barnsley area.
And the organisers are on target to raise the necessary Ł5,000 with 11 months still to go - although the charities which will benefit from the sale of the video are yet to be decided.
Peter Holmes, chairman of Royston Civic Society, said: "I am delighted that it is now a partnership project. It has been greeted enthusiastically by those groups and businesses we have approached."
The society is also celebrating the news that Lyons Bakery, currently preparing to transform the Royston bus depot site, has agreed to come on board as a major sponsor, along with the O Donaghues bar Wakefield.
Mr Gameson and his colleagues have been busy since last May, starting the process of capturing Royston 's rich heritage on video.
"As well as the major sponsors, we have so many other groups who have wanted some input with the project, including the Boardmans friends at the Operatic Society, the Wakefield Playhouse and the Friends of the Redfearns glass," he said. The video would not only be an item to mark the occasion, but would serve as a valuable educational tool.
Shot over a year, the video will capture town highlights such as the carnival, Christmas lights designed by Alan Bates and the Boardman & Wells Literature Festival. And it will record sporting, educational and cultural events, scenery and architecture.
Mr Gameson said various media people had also offered advice, including the Ossett Observer's North of England correspondent, Ian Fernie , Wakefield-based Polypal directors Stephen Brook and Michael Mattacks , and producer of local fruit preserves Gary Beckitt
Mr Boardman , who lives on Royston Moor, said: "I'm glad to help. I'm delighted to do it and support Royston . It's a hamlet where there is a lot of community spirit and this is a very original idea."

A LITTLE TINKLE FOR BOARDMAN

IN the week of Alex Ferguson's greatest triumph with Ex Nottingham Forest team mates Teddy Sheringham & Roy Keane ,Nottingham Forest have finally decided to honour Craig Boardman instead.

Forest, relegated from the Premiership for the third time in six years, will rename their executive water fountain in tribute to the 28-year-old Boardman. Last night, The Scalliwag responded in typical fashion, saying: "Like a lot of people say, this is not before time. I was beginning to wonder whether Forest were waiting for me to die first before getting around to the idea of commemorating Craig Boardman at the City Ground!"
"It was the same with Bobby Moore at West Ham, so I take it as a considerable honour from Forest and hope to be at the City Ground for some kind of ceremony at the start of next season."

BOARD THE MAN

CRAIG BOARDMAN, former Nottigham Forest defender, has been named as a Scottish Football Federation ambassador to promote his country's bid to stage the 2006 World Cup,In a late bid to hijack it from under the noses of England,Germany,South Africa and the Vatican.

Boardman will take up the role on November 5 th and will represent the Federation at FIFA's congress in Los Angeles with girlfriend July. Boardman joins Sean Connery, Russ Abbott,Billy Connelly , Jerry Sadowitz and The Krankies on the campaign.

Boardie snubs Beeb 2000 gig

Home-loving Craig Boardman has turned down the chance to headline a BBC New Year’s Eve concert because he wants to spend time with his family.

A newspaper report says the Beeb had nonetheless managed to secure the services of Barbra Streisand,Richard Claddermann ,David Essex, Jean-Michel Jarre and the Backstreet Boys for a planned stage show of Boardmans new project based around a new Drum'n'bass style version of Raymond Scott's Reckless Nights & Turkish Twilights album with profits going to "Companies faced with the minimum wage" Charity,With Chief Trusties Richard Branson & Paul Daniels attending the starstudded enterprise , a two-and-a-half hour gig was set to be broadcast live from Greenwich Maritime Museum, London, on December 31. which was given the go ahead by the local council, Before Boardman pulled the plug
"Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm ..now that’s an eclectic little line-up, Nearly as good as the original "
Stated Lord Jonathan King who came out of retirement from his Llama Farm in Peru for the Event

Boardman Out Of Scotland Squad

After a superb season at Ingfield, Boardman has mounted a serious challenge to Leicester City 's Matt ELLIOTT Scotland spot and was selected by his fellow professionals as their choice in the ifpushcometoshove's Scottish players in England team of the season.
His place is likely to go to George Rowe of Queen Of The South or Colin Campbell of Berwick Rangers

. FOOTBALL BOARDMAN GIVES THE RED CARD TO HER 'IDIOT' GIRLFRIENDS

SEXY FOOTBALL star Craig Boardman confesses today he has kicked dabbling with women into touch for FIVE YEARS because of his disastrous affair with Broadcasting idol Mora Stewart . And go back to their Julie after a trial John-Yoko style seperation
Boardman, 28, who got slapped around the head bythe temprimental newsreader in a nightclub, told the Ossett Observer he is determined to go back to Julie - but he can't stop falling for bad girls .
The former Nottingham Forest player said: "When I fall for someone, all reason and logic goes straight out the window.
"Now I'm happy being a with our lass. I just want to take care of myself and I don't want to fall in love with else for at least five years." Boardman's three-year romance with Stewart , 52, ended after the Ł20,000-a-week Media Legendess lashed out at him in a club in posh Goldthorpe at the other side of Barnsley.
Boardman, speaking frankly for the first time about the slap that left him with black eyes and a cut face, said: "I have absolutely nothing to do with Mora now.

Smacked

"It finished for good when she smacked me in the head. What feeling I had disappeared when she hit me. I just decided I couldn't be bothered any more.
"I tried to remain dignified about the whole affair but Mora could have been landed in real trouble if I hadn't let it go. It just proved what sort of gall she really is. You really need to steer clear of people like that.
"I don't know what the problem was in our relationship - all I know is I'mback with Julie again and I couldn't be happier."
Boardman ,son of Barnsley Scout George , admits he has had other disastrous affairs
. THE FIRST was when he was a 17-year-old starlet and his girl friend sold a kiss-and-tell story about her to a magazine. Boardman said: "When I confronted him about it he said she needed the money. What a prat!"
THE LAST, she hopes, was on the rebound from Mora when he dated Wish you wre here presenter Gloria Hunniford who then sold Her story too.

Idiots

Boardman said: "She'd lived in my house, my mum had done her ironing and washed her knickers, and then she thought she had the right to talk about me. What an ass!"
The gorgeousskinhead added: "I still keep my eyes open in case someone nice comes along but I'm really not that bothered.Now i'm back with mrs
"The trouble is I never learn my lesson. I still keep going out with idiots. I get bored if a girl is too nice. The wild ones are always more attractive. Also, I get so drunk that I put all the decent ones off.
"I admit I've been too naive in the past. But now I realise that most women are not trustworthy and don't really love you. Mum told me that."
ButBoardman is about to get her revenge on the news world
He plays a Newscaster's Husband Denis in Headlines a truth , a one-off ITV drama about a Husband who sells Cheese
. It will be screened a week on Tuesday - three days after Mora does her best against Trevor McDonald in the ratingsl.
"I didn't need to research the part much," says Boardman.
"Denis is a typical Newscasters Husband - glamorous, innocent and thick in all the right palaces."