Q: How can you tell if a blonde has benn using your computer?
A: The joystick is wet

Q: What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her look more attractive?
A: Her ankles

Q: What do you say to a blonde who wont give in?
A: Have another beer

Q: How do you make a blondes eyes twinkle?

A: Shine a flashlight in her ears

Q: Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?
A: She did not want to wake the sleeping pills

Q: Why dud the deaf blonde sit on the newspaper?
A: She thought she could lip read.

Q: Why did the blonde have a coathanger in her car?
A: In case she locked her keys in it

Q: Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence?
A: To see what was on the other side

Q: Why did the blonde drive into a ditch?
A: To turn off the blinker

Q: What do you call a blonde with a briefcase in a tree?
A: A branch manager

Q: What do a blonde and a beer bottle have in common?
A: They're both empty from the neck up

Q: What is a blondes favorite potato chip?
A: Free-to-lay (Frito Lay)

Q: What do a blonde & a halogen headlamp have in common?
A: They both get screwed on the front of a Ford Escort

Q: Why did the blonde have her zip code tatooed on her stomach?
A: So her male could be delivered to the write box

Q: Did you hear about the blonde skydiver?
A: She missed the Earth

Q: What do a blonde and a moped have in common?
A: They are both fun to ride until a friend sees you on one

Q: What do you call an all blonde skydiving team?
A: New version of the lawn darts game

Q: How do you confuse a blonde?
A: Ask her to alphabetize a bag of M & M's.

Q: Why did the blonde try to steal a police car?
A: She saw 911 on the back and thought it was a Porsche.

Q. Why did the blonde call the welfare office?
A. She wanted to know how to cook food stamps.

Q: Where do blondes go to meet their relatives?
A. The vegetable garden.

Q: What do you call four blondes in a Volkswagen?
A: Far-from-thinkin'.

Q: Why don't they let blondes swim in the ocean?
A: Because they can't get the smell out of the tuna.

Q: How many blondes does it take to play tag?
A: One

Q: What happened to the blonde tap dancer?
A: She slipped off and fell down the drain.

Q: What's black and fuzzy and hangs from the ceiling?
A: A blonde electrician.

Q: What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios?
A: Oh look! Doughnut seeds!

Q: What can you hit a blonde with and she will never know it?
A: A thought

Q: How do you give a blonde a brain transplant?
A: Blow in her ear

Q: Where do you look for blonde obituaries?
A: In the Home Improvement section

Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
A: Gifted

Q: What is the difference between a refrigerater and a blonde?
A: The refrigerater doesn't fart when you pull out your meat

Q: Why did the blonde smile when she walked down the marriage aisle?
A: She realized she had given her last blowjob

Q: Why do blondes give great blowjobs?
A: It's what they train for all their lives

Q: Why did the blonde fail as a prostitute?
A: She kept having affairs with men

Q: What is the similarity between blondesblondes and a screen door?
A: The more you bang them the looser they get

Q: Why do blondes have T.G.I.F printed on their shirts?
A: So they know that Tits Go In Front Q: What do you call a zit on a blondes butt?
A: A brain tumor

Q: Why don't blondes eat pickles?
A: Because they get their heads stuck in the jar

Q: Why do blondes have T.G.I.F. printed in their shoes?
A: So they know Toes Go In First

Q: How many blondes does it take to change a flat tire?
A: 5- 2 to get sodas, 2 to cry,& 1 to call daddy

Q: How do you make a blonde laugh on Monday?
A: Tell her a joke on Monday

Q: Why were the blondes lips all swolen up?
A: From trying to blow out lightbulbs

Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of orange juice for 2 hours?
A: Because it said concentrate

Q: How do you confuse a blonde?
A: Line up 6 shovels and tell her to take her "PICK"

Q: Why do bondes wear ear-muffs?
A: To avoid a draft

Q: Why did the blonde put her finger over the nail when she was hammering?
A: The noise gave her a headache

Q: How do blondes kill a bird?
A: They throw it off a hill

Q: How do blondes kill a fish?
A: They drown it

Q: Name the best castle RPG site in the world!
A: Right here! Lord Ravens!

Q: How do you confuse a blonde?
A: You don't there born that way

Q: What is the official blonde person cheer?
A: I'm blonde I'm blonde I'm B-L-O-N.... ah well I'm blonde I'm blonde yeah yeah yeah

Q: Where do blondes wash there hair?
A: In the sink because thats where you wash vegetables

Ther once lived a blonde who wanted to buy a t.v. So she went to the store and found one she liked, and asked a clerk how much it is. The clerk told her they don't sell merchandise to blondes. So this frustrated the blonde and she went home and died her hair brown and went back to the store. When she arrived back she found the same t.v. and asked a different clerk how much it is . The clerk again told her they don't sell merchandise to blondes. Well this again annoyed the blonde and asked how he knew she was blonde. He said simple that is a microwave your looking at.

Ther were three blondes driving down to Disney Land. So they drove for about seven hours and noticed a sign that read Disney Land left. So this annoyed the blondes and they turned around and decided to go home. So on there way home they saw a sign that read CLEAN RESTROOMS NEXT 8 MILES. So by the time they drove 8 miles they had cleaned 42 restrooms

There once was a blonde who wanted to ride a horse, but had no experiance on how to. So she saddles up,grabs the rains, and the horse starts to gallop along at a steady pase. So all of a sudden she realizes that she is falling of horse. So she figures that if she jumps of the horse she won't get hurt. So she jumps of and lands. Then the K-MART MANAGER CAME OUT AND TURNED THE MACHINE OFF


How to tell if she is truly blonde!

1- She sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
2- She thought a quarterback was a refund.
3- She tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.
4- She thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.
- She thought Eartha Kitt was a set of garden tools.
5- She thought General Motors was in the army.
6- She thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats.
7- She thought TuPac Shakur was a Jewish holiday.
8- Under "education" on her job application, she put "Hooked On Phonics".
9- She tried to drown a fish.
10- She tripped over a cordless phone.
11- She spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice can because it said concentrate.
12- She got stabbed in a shoot-out.
13- She told me to meet her at the corner of "WALK" and "DONT WALK".
They had to burn the school down to get her out of third grade.
14- At the bottom of the application where it says "sign here," she put Sagittarius.
15- She asked for a price check at the Dollar Store.
16- It takes her two hours to watch "60 Minutes".
17- She studied for a blood test-and failed.
18- She thought she needed a token to get on "Soul Train."
19- She sold the car for gas money!
20- When she saw the "NC-17 under 17 not admitted", she went home and got 16friends.

One ady a blonde lady went out to her mailbox, looked in ti and closed it immediately. She went back to it a little while later and did the same thing. Well after doing this 10-15 times her neighbor came out and said to the blonde "boy you must really be waiting for something important" The blonde said back" No I'm working on my computer and it keeps telling me that I have mail" =)



A LETTER FROM A BLONDE MOM TO HER BLONDE DAUGHTER =)

>>A letter from a Blonde Mother to her Blonde Daughter >> >> Dear Stella: >> >> I'm writing this letter slow because I know you can't read fast. We >> don't live where we did when you left home. I read in the newspaper >> that most accidents happen within 20 miles from home, so we moved. I >> won't >> be able to send you the address because the blonde lady who used to >> live >> here took the house numbers when they moved so that she wouldn't have >> to >> change their address. >> >> This place is real nice. It even has a washing machine. I'm not sure >> it works too well though; last week I put a load in and pulled the >> chain >> and haven't seen them since. >> >> The weather isn't bad here. It only rained out twice last week; the >> first time for three days and the second for four days. >> >> The coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt Thelma said would be >> too heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so I cut them off >> and >> put them in the pockets. >> >> I locked my keys in the car yesterday. I was worried because it took >> me two hours to get your sister and your father out. >> >> Your sister had a baby this morning; but I haven't found out what it >> is yet so I don't know if you are an aunt or an uncle. >> >> Uncle Ted fell in a whiskey vat last week. Some men tried to pull him >> out, but he fought them off and drowned. We had him cremated and he >> burned for three days. >> >> Three of your friends went off a bridge in a pick-up truck. Judy was >> driving, she rolled down the window and swam to safety. Your other >> two friends were in back, they drowned because they couldn't get the >> tailgate down. >> >> There isn't much more news at this time. Nothing much has happened. >> >> Love Mom >> >> P.S. I was going to send you some money but the envelope was already >> sealed. >> ******************************************************* >> >SHE WAS SO BLONDE THAT*******************************************************

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Hey Guess what!!!!??? I won an award!!!! =)
=)It makes me Happy. Here it is!

The world is great now that I won an award! HaHaHa

OH great another 2 awards. The one I can't figure out how to post so i can only post the one. The other is the humor award So here they are!





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