Massachusetts where I am currently a junior in high
school. As you will see, I love to write. I enjoy
using metaphor's in my writing. My musical influences
are Tool, A Perfect Circle, AFI, The Dresden Dolls, My
Chemical Romance, Nine Inch Nails, and many others as
well. I write about life and how I see it and where I
fit in this side show cabaret of a world. I also love
to create art, I'll try to get some of my work up
soon. My friends are like my family. I love them very
much. You can usually find me hanging around the mall
on Friday nights. No matter how much older I get, my
mallrat lifestyle will probably never change.
My first love and talent has always been acting. I
have been in about 70 different drama and musical
productions since I was 4 years old. In the future, I
would like to attend Emerson College in Boston, and
major in acting.
I idolize Maynard James Keenan, Davey Havok, and Alex
Grey. They inspire me in 3 totally different ways. And
without them, I wouldn't know where to find
inspiration.
~*"underneath her skin and jewelry, hidden in her
words and eyes, is a wall that's cold and ugly, and
she's scared as hell"*~
 Locked Goblet
in love that is forbidden
there is a labyrinth
lined with vines
fresh grapes, posion filled
like hearts willing to break glass
to fufill their own desires
he is owned by the forest maiden
pure in her white gown
and glowing face
the young man can not escape her snare
a mistress in black watches him from the hollow
how she wants him for her own
to lock him in a glass goblet forever
then he will be hers
alas, the forest maiden can not wither
but the mistress can
she knows he will never be hers
he will never be hers
he will never be hers
now wither away to dust
and it is polished away
Dusk
Dusk as the wind
Summer in the eve
How is it so
Love
Dirt in the rain
Like a rose
Quiet
Lonely
The meadow
Dusk is now gone
Morning
Dew on the grass
Covers
Like a blanket
Dusk is back again
Enchantment
My life is filled with enchanting memories
About past lives
And witchcraft
Do I dream, or is it real?
I still don't belive this is my life
I want to learn magic
I want to live that dream of
Enchantment
For Karel
the dust has now settled
but the winds will howl again
the whispering of hate thru the Autum leaves
will flood my lobes
like the eternal flame, you have places on top of my grave
disguised as a candle that we bought together
and you have kept it on your shelf
'til this day
when our nightmares came true
your velvet eyes weep for me
like when we watched the rain drip down the window sill
in English class
my seat there is empty now
but my six foot hole is now filled
you were the one that brought the fog into focus
as the howling wind begins again
the leaves, they dance for you
they circle around the graves
and try to paint on your skirt
red orange yellow brown
red orange yellow brown
red orange yellow brown
bones, dead bodies, your best friend
next year, when the Autum comes again
raping and tearing the sky
you will fall to your knees
and trace the engraved words on my stone with your cold fingers
the letters feel deep and final
the only sounds that escape your mouth
are the words
why, Bethany!
why! WHY!?
Greed
wouldn't it be nice
if you could end it all
watch strangers scramble for their most prized posessions
those possessions,
made by other strangers who
are scrambling to save themselves as well
a cycle of pathetic self obsessed humans
with nothing more to care about
other than their coffee and business deals
and then there is me
sitting alone on a hill
watching it all slip away
i am protected by the hill's innocence
this grassy pile of dirt,
has never walked by a starving homeless man
and refuse to give him spare change
so atleast there would be a chance that
he could buy something nourishing to eat
even if it meant he would only live one more day
the hill that i sit on has never done such things
the ball of fire that once was the sun
comes crashing down
down
down...
it is soon extinguished by the tidal waves
i still sit
i let an ant crawl on my leg
it can't hurt me,
it doesn't carry a gun
the world is now
silent
and
dark
but, isnt that how it all began?
so all the technology and buildings
will have to be invented all over again
so now i understand that no one is original
there was always a similar version of ourselves
before we ever came into existance
we just couldn't see it
we were to blinded by
our greed
Heart
in the quiet corner of shattered dreams
i sit alone
and think of lovers
how much i despise such lust
to be touched, held, and fucked
so hard that the virgin whore weeps
regret the pleasure
i crave the secret
a couple of about my age pass by
they stare, laugh, then move on
my gentle hand wants nothing more
than to tear their hearts out
and hear them beat on the ground
a wave of muffled sound
two prostitutes dead...
Hit
Fine
Take them away to prove your point
Sheild their images from my eyes
But you can not erase them from my brain
There is nothing you can do to stop the memories
Nothing you can do to stop the beating of my heart
Hit me again you fucking coward
Are you happy now?
Is the red mark on my face comforting to you?
Good
I'm glad it helps
I would rather die than be "strong"
Like you pretend to be
I know who I am
I am only being me
You don't like the color black, do you?
Yes...It dark like a shadow
But its not as dark as your heart
Mold me again why dont you?!
Bring the tower of my soul crashing down
You like the sound of that
I know you do
I know it when you say "fuck you"
Haven't you ever realized that those words
Stab me like one thousand mocking knives
Its not the words
Its that they are coming out of the mouth of someone
I thought loved me
You are pathetic
You really are
You can call me a "sterotypical teenager"
But I see things as they are
I find comfort in the world of music
Maynard's
Beautiful
Voice
But I seem to never find comfort in my home
You don't like what I say
So you hit me again
fucking coward
I bet it makes you feel good to see me cry
But the blood flowing thru my veins is crying as well
But you can't see it
Not unless I spill my own blood
THEN you can see all of me cry
I laugh at your posing omniscent eye
And yet
You hit me again
Music and my friends are my only condolence
Your violin string of apathy
That I wish to break
Go ahead
Throw me into my room again
Where I will sit, cry, think, listen to Tool
And write a poem to no one
Thats what you wanted, right?
Mask
i'm waiting for 5 o' clock
i'm waiting for the last petal to fall
the last one to laugh
as always
the last one to leave
as always
the red death drops its cloak in the hall
the prince is dead
a very deserving death
the cold warmth of the shocked faces
thanking the stars that i'm not one of them
masks can hide you
but who will hide you from your lie
they lived a lie
and it came and killed them
but spared me
excuse me but
have you seen my mask?
Maynard's Spiral
inhale the knives
exhale your knowledge
push it up
bring it down
uncover your spinning eye
embrace my trembling figure
my mind clouds
my heart continues the red river
flowing carelessly thru my veins
the shadow closes around us
the ground shatters
we fall thru
a great spiral
down
down
down
all i can say
ride to the end with me Maynard
ride to the end with me
ride to the end with me Maynard
ride to the end with me
let it close
do not forget
how much you inspire me
love can not describe it
so until i find the right words in the tunnel
ride the spiral to the end again with me Maynard...
Porcelain
please don't damage the porcelain
the paint on it shines like my eyes
when they are full of tears
like right now
i want to freeze your heart
then throw it against the wall
and watch it shatter into dust
please don't damage the porcelain
Slate
my screen clutching through the face
beats such time
i shall find lovely harm
i embraced the feelings you have only to see
that you are not enchanting enough for me
Secret Hope
I walk thru the field of enchantment
Under the deadly harvest moon
For I am searching
But for what?
I collapse onto the addicting grass
It enters into my imagination
For what I am searching for
Has led me to my
Death...
Tears Hate Judgement
with each moment of pain
you take my innocence away
i can remember the times
when we used to sit under the stars
and dream of my future
when you hit me
i can't help but cringe like a coward
i don't want to hurt you
i hope the pain you give me is comforting
i'm falling apart
to all the shoulders i've cried on
thank you
to all the mouths that have laughed at me
fuck you
i wish kind words would saturate me
like the water saturates a drowned body
t e a r s
h a t e
Utopia
chimes of wisdom echo
harmonic tones of the vocal instrument
flood the silver streets
great fields bloom new life
my pale vision captures the essence
all is a perfect dream
cruelty and malice
are nothing but grains of sand
sinking into the bottomless ocean floor
the sun never sets
the moon always rises
gemstones flicker the mood
brilliant colors
forever happines
laughter and french horns
and where am i?
sitting alone dreaming of this imaginary place...
Worms
your screams are symphonic
and so very pure
haha, touch me again
and i'll rip open your skull
with my rust covered crowbar
and scramble your brains
then scatter them amongst the ground
food for worms
Copyright © 2003, Sprial for her artwork, All Rights Reserved.
Copyright © 2003, Flair & Dysis, All Rights Reserved.
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