Today marks a tremendous occasion in McDonaldLand as Ronald McDonald called for a press conference to announce new members to the McDonald's family and the McDonalds Menu. Welcome the McTurds! After the people of the world became tired of the same old Chicken McNuggets and Retarded Purple dog humpers Ronald decided it was time for a change. He called upon a group of instrument playing turds from the south side of McDonaldLand to fill the void in the McDonalds menu. "It's the new millennium and the world has gone to shit... so why not add singing poo to my menu?" joked Ronald with press. The new ad campaign starting in the coming months will show the McTurds and singing and dancing about how much they love to be eaten... pooed out then eaten again! Ronald went on to tell the press "It's the new millennium, people love to recycle and the McTurds are the ultimate in recycling! The very FIRST recyclable food!! It's groundbreaking and I for one am glad to be alive to see this dream become a reality! Thank god it's finally cool to eat your poo and they eat it again after it exits your own poo warming oven!" You will be able to buy a 3, 6, or 98 piece McTurd "Toilet pack" or in a valu meal with a soda and a blue urinal cake for desert. Ronald promises that every McTurd will be made fresh instore every morning after breakfast and again after lunch. If the McTurds are as a good of sellers as Mr. McDonald expects them to be you will see other flavors arrive like the prototype "Peanut pack" and the McTurd Diarrhea shake. Also expect McTurd Happie Meels and toys of all your favorite poo nuggets. And if you think this is just some idea with no backing... think again. Ronald has already gotten Homer Simpson to endorse the McTurds and taken him away from Burger King and their whopper promotion. When asked for comment Homer said "Mmmmmmmm turds..." He then posed for pictures after taking a bite out of a McTurd. When asked why Ronald needed to introduce a new food and a whole new ad campaign he said "There is only one reason to do such a thing... Love of food!!!" <<Back To Main>>