It is not easy to understand a person suffering Anorexia. People living with the illness often have a low self-esteem and a tremendous need to control their surroundings and emotions. Quite often the Eating Disorder is a unique reaction to an array of external and internal conflicts, such as stress, anxiety, and unhappiness. Anorexia is a negative way to cope with these emotions. One patient described her disorder as, "...starvation fills a void inside when it's approval from you I crave. The desire for food is gone and you are there again... yelling... so negative. Times like this filled with the pounding urge to run far away and disappear..."
The person suffering with Anorexia may be abnormally sensitive about being perceived as fat, or have a massive fear of becoming fat, though not all people living with Anorexia have this fear. They may be afraid of losing control over the amount of food they eat, accompanied by the desire to control their emotions and reactions to their emotions. With a low self-esteem and need for acceptance they will turn to obsessive dieting and starvation as a way to control not only their weight, but their feelings and actions regarding the emotions attached. Some also feel that they do not deserve pleasure out of life, and will deprive themselves of situations offering pleasure, including eating.
Some of the behavioral signs can be: obsessive exercise, calorie and fat gram counting, starvation and restriction of food, self-induced vomiting, the use of diet pills, laxatives or diuretics to attempt to control weight, and a persistent concern with body image. It is not uncommon for people suffering with Anorexia to waver through periods of Bulimia, bingeing and purging, as well.
One young woman describes the feelings of Anorexia, "... lost in the darkness of my own circumstance, criticizing echoes leaving me awake in the night... the barrier and blockades that keep me safe and in control while I pretend that I am okay... "
It is important to point out that there can be a number of ways a person suffering from Anorexia can portray their disorder. The inherent trait of a person suffering Anorexia is to attempt to maintain strict control over food intake. In a number of cases a man or woman suffering will seem to eat normal meals with only periods of restriction. Anorexics are sometimes known to eat junk food, particularly candy, drink a lot of coffee or tea, and/or smoke. They may deny hunger, make excuses to avoid eating, will often hide food they claim to have eaten, use diet pills to control appetite, or attempt to purge the food away with self-induced vomiting, or by taking laxatives.
"...Emotions control me... make me hide in a safe place of silence." Says another victim of this disorder. "My mind stays distant from what my heart feels. If I say it... it's real... so I say nothing. I can't touch it... if I did I would curl up or crumble. I may seem to be made by heart of stone.... but really just chalk... and I'm afraid to face the possibility that I could easily turn to dust..."
Symptoms Of Anorexia Nervosa
