(To Angel who’s transformed to Angelus)
Drusilla: “We’re going to destroy the world, wanna come?”
Angel: “No, I’m more interested in destroying the slayer.”
Spike: “Well, she’s in the world, so that should work out.”
Buffy: “This’ll probably go faster if we split up.”
Lilly: “Okay. Can I come with you?”
Buffy: “Okay, where did I lose you on the whole splitting up thing?”
(Buffy and Spike are engaged after a spell goes wrong)
Buffy: “Spike and I are getting married!”
Xander: “How? What? How?”
Giles: “Three excellent questions.”
Giles: “Buffy, you technically were dead.”
Buffy: “I was only gone for a minute.”
Giles: “That’s why Kendra is here. You were dead.”
Buffy: “Would you stop saying that? I was only dead for a little while.”
Giles: “Is everyting okay?”
Buffy: “It’s okay, Kendra killed the bad lamp.”
Joyce: “Have we met?”
Spike: “Yeah, we have. You hit me with an axe once. Remember ‘get the hell away from my daughter’?”
Giles: “It’s a trick. They get inside my head and make me see things I want.”
Xander: “Then why would they make you see me?”
Giles: “Oh, right. Let’s go.”
Spike: “Blood is life, lack-brain. Why do you think we eat it? It’s what keeps you going. Makes you warm. Makes you hard. Makes you other than dead.”
Xander: “Some of Buffy’s friends played a funny joke. They took her stuff and now she wants us to help her get it back from her friends who sleep all day and have no tans.”
(After Xander’s basement leaks)
Spike: “My soddin’ chair’s all. . . sodden.”
(Spike takes a lackadaisical approach to saving Giles’ life.)
Giles: “You might have let me in on your plan while he throttled me.”
Spike: “Oh, poor Watcher. Did your life pass before your eyes? Cup o’ tea, cup o’ tea,
almost got shagged, cup o’ tea.”
Xander: “Who’s a little fear demon? Come on. Who’s a fear demon?”
Giles: “Don’t taunt the fear demon.”
Xander: “Why? Can he hurt me?”
Giles: “No, it’s just tacky.”
Kathy: “Does this sweater make me look fat?”
Buffy: “The fact that you’re fat makes you look fat. That sweater just makes you look purple.”
(Standing before the gang as they prepare to leave to fight evil hell-goddess Glory)
Buffy: “Remember: The ritual starts, we all die; and I’ll kill anyone who comes near Dawn.”
(Turns and leaves the room)
Spike: ”Well, not exactly the St. Crispin’s Day speech, was it?”
(Picking up remaining weapons)
Giles: “We few, we happy few. . .”
Spike: ”. . .We band of buggered.”
Xander: “Hey, I happen to be. . .”
Spike: “A glorified bricklayer?”
Xander: ”I’m also a swell bowler.”
Anya: ”Has his own shoes.”
Spike: ”The gods themselves do tremble.”
Spike: “I’ve been all wrong-headed about this. Weepin, crawling, blaming everybody else. I want Dru back, I just have to be the man I was. The man she loved. I’m gonna do what I should have done in the first place. I’ll find her, wherever she is, and tie her up and torture her until she likes me again. Love’s a funny thing.”
Xander: “What are you doing?”
Buffy: “Looking for more evil trio cameras, or actually, evil uno.”
Xander: “Ah yes, the sinister yet addictive card game.”
Anya: “For a thousand years I wielded the power of the wish. I brought ruin upon the hands of unfaithful men. I offered destruction and chaos for the pleasure of the lower beings. I was feared and worshipped across the mortal globe, and now I’m stuck at Sunnydale High as a mortal! A child! And, I’m flunking math.”
(After Giles falls into a pit full of vampire chicks and is pulled out by Riley)
(Pointing to his foot which is missing a shoe)
Giles: “My, my shoe.”
(Moves to get back into the pit)
Riley: “No, no, no. No sir. No more chick pit for you.”
Anya: “Your Uncle Rory let me in. Does he always smell like peppermint?”
Xander: “The man likes his schnopps.”
(Making fun of Dracula before he knew it was Dracula)
Xander: “Where’d you get that accent? Sesame Street?”
(Counting on fingers in Transylvanian accent)
Xander: “One, two, three victims. Ha ha ha!”
(Talking to Xander)
Dracula: “You are strange and off-putting. Go now.”
(Talking to Amy, who’s been a rat for a few years, and has just recently been made human again.)
Buffy: “So, how’ve you been?”
Amy: “Rat. You?”
Buffy: “Dead.”
(Replies in a “that’s nice” fashion)
Amy: “Ah.”
Back to Page 2 of BTVS quotes
Back to *B*.
