1. What's worse than nailing a baby to a tree?
Ripping it off.
2. What's grosser than a dumpster full of dead
babies?
The one on the bottom eating its way to the top.
3. What's little, red, and goes round and round?
A baby in a blender.
4. What's little, black and blue, and goes round and
round?
A baby in the dryer.
5. What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan?
1 baby in 10 trash cans.
6. What's little, blue, and sits in the corner?
A baby in a bag.
7. What's little, green, and sits in the corner?
The same baby about a week later.
8. What's little, yellow, blue and on the bottom of a pool?
A dead baby and with a slashed floaty.
9. What is red and white and squirms in a corner?
A baby playing with razor blades.
10. How do you make a dead baby float?
Fill a glass with root beer and add one scoop of ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.
Take your foot off it's head!
11. What's blue and knocks on glass?
A baby in a fish tank.
12. How do you get a dead baby out of a tree?
Give a Mexican a stick and tell him it's a pinata.
13. Why did the dead baby cross the road?
It was stapled to the chicken!
14. Why do you stick a baby in a blender feet first?
So you can see the expression on its face!
15. What's worse than a dead baby in a trashcan lid?
A trashcan lid in a dead baby!
16. What's easier to unload: A truck full of dead babies or a truck full of bowling balls?
A truck full of dead babies -- you can use a pitchfork!
17. What's more fun than spinning a baby on the clothes line?
Stopping it with a shovel.
18. What's worse than running a baby over with a car?
Getting it out of the tires!
19. What's red and lies in all four corners of the room?
A baby that's been playing with a chain saw!
20. What's red, sits in front of the mirror, and gets smaller and smaller?
A baby coming its hair with a potato peeler.
21. What's a sure way to stop a baby from crying?
Use an axe!
22. Why does the husband always bring boiling water at birth?
In case the baby dies, he can make soup.
