Serenade In Blue
Disclaimer:
For legal purposes, Joss Whedon and company own the characters from the shows
Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel the Series.
BUT IN ALL OTHER
WAYS THAT ARE MUCH MORE IMPORTANT- Buffy owns Angel and Angel owns Buffy.
Always and forever.
Feedback:
Hey, if not for me- then for all the terrific Sarah/David and B/A fanfiction
writers out there! They really could use all the support you have to give in
these dark times.
Dedication:
I’m dedicating this one to all the B/Aers who feel like they are losing hope.
All we can do is try. And continue to Chester.
This also goes to
all the nice B/A friendly babblers at the Babble Board, BA or BUST! And as
always- to all of the B/A and Sarah and David shippers out there! I hope this
makes you all happy. WE MUST KEEP THE FAITH! Don’t worry guys- I’m not going
anywhere, and YES- I will get my next big fics done soon. I PROMISE!
Rating: Possibly PG-13? Nothing at all graphic.
Distribution:
Wow? You actually want this? Well email me and I'll give it you on a silver
platter.
Background:
Did you ever have a song stuck in your head? I wrote this since I’m a big lover
of Big Band music, (I’d buy Royal Crown Revue albums if it wasn’t tainted with
B/Rness… also, I’d need money too) and wanted to rid this song of its B/R
taint.
Takes place RIGHT
AFTER the “off-screen meeting” of Buffy and Angel which happens after Buffy
Season Six’s FLOODED and Angel Season Three’s CARPE NOCTEM. Both Angel and
Buffy think about the meeting as they make their way home. Sigh… If only there
existed a copy of Brad Kane singing of SERENADE IN BLUE where I don’t have to
listen to mushy B/R in the middle of it…ewww….
“You’re listening to
Auguries, your host for tonight’s edition of NICE AND SLOW… The show where we
give it to all of you listeners nice and slow,” the female announcer began, as
Angel started his car.
Buffy was alive.
Alive and warm. In
his arms, or was- a few minutes that seemed like centuries ago.
“And while all of
you might not be with the ones you love, all of us here at NICE AND SLOW are
with you… Hoping that you can someday find that special someone,” Auguries
himself intoned, as Angel shook his head.
He found his
someone. On a sunny day in Los Angeles in 1996. And even though this Auguries
person sounded every bit sincere, knowing that a complete stranger who’d
probably never know WHAT you were, let alone who you were didn’t really console
the vampire who had- once again, let go of his sunshine. His light. His Buffy.
“I know for most of
you that isn’t a lot of comfort,” Auguries said, as Angel was completely
surprised this man had somehow known his thoughts. “All we can do in this
life… is try.”
Try… A
three-lettered word that sounded good on paper. But did trying ever REALLY
work? Sometimes he felt like he should just chuck it all together, drop all of
what made him special and just- blend… Blend so much that he became another
blissfully ignorant soul that had the job of saving. Goofy, even. Those kinds
of people didn’t have problems. Or cares. Or demons. Or lost loves that reached
out to him in his dreams but were never there when he woke in a cold sweat just
before dawn. They didn’t have to deal with the danger, the havoc this whole
fight did to your soul… They didn’t have to deal…
And somewhere, as if
his personality, that tiny corner of soul that made him REALLY care was a
switch… Angel turned it off, letting himself blend into the dark California
night…Those kinds of people didn’t have to deal. And neither did he.
****
“Try,” Buffy said,
monotonically echoing Augeries’s words as the bus radio droned on with the rest
of NICE AND SLOW.
Buffy curled up in
her front seat as she listened to the man. Try? Try… A three-lettered word that
sounded good on paper. But did trying ever REALLY work? Buffy didn’t know where
to even begin with that question. Did she even know how to do that anymore?
Try? It seemed like something innate. A fundamental part of existing. But even
that bit of knowledge from Mother Nature seemed missing, as she rode the bus back
to Sunnydale. Making an effort, working through everything- the how’s, the
actual doing… How? Buffy had nothing to fall back on, nothing to start with.
Nothing.
She was empty
inside. Devoid of anything. Even when she had seen Angel tonight- she had been
more at ease with him than she had with any of the friends since she…returned
here. But later and later on in the night, she felt that emptiness return- and
completely swallow her whole as she boarded the now sparsely occupied bus.
For the good of… everyone,
they parted again. It wasn’t anything new. Though that didn’t make having to
leave each other any easier. Not one bit.
Was there anything
in this world that could ever make her snap out of this? Any way to escape?
Couldn’t she just do… something, anything- to just be Buffy again? All she
needed was that anything to stir her up inside. Something to fill her. It
didn’t matter what it was- just as long as she wasn’t empty anymore. She
couldn’t be empty… Even walking around the tombstones of Shady Hill Cemetery
with nothing but self-loathing and contempt sounded nice… Was there anything
worse than being empty? Free from life… When did the proposition that had
disgusted her as high school girl, that she still abhorred and spat upon-
become more alive than she was now?
“Life can be empty,”
Augeries continued, as Buffy snapped out of her thoughts and tuned into the
faceless radio voice. “And life can be hard to deal with. We only hope, all of
us here can make it better for you to bear. Nothing should ever have to be
borne alone…”
****
“Borne alone,” Angel
remembered, any indifference that had built up in him came rushing out of
his body and the current of longing settled in his heart again.
“Some things are
forgotten. But we have our memories… And we can share those with others,”
Augeries said, making Angel screech his car to a stop right then and there.
“There’s a memory I’d like to share with you. For all of those of you who
wonder… Its never too late… ”
A lump deep inside
his undead throat formed as he whispered, “Never?”
****
“Never,” Buffy
repeated as she nodded in agreement, clutching her purse. “Its never too late.”
His voice soft and
kind, offered, “And so, I have for you… A dance while we… Serenade in Blue.”
Buffy further eased
into her seat at the sound of the song title. Did she remember it? There was
something… It didn’t matter now. It tugged at the edges of familiarity- but in
the end, all Buffy really saw wasn’t a memory. It was a dream. A dream of soft
melodic beats, strong cool hands, big soulful amber eyes and lips that filled
her with love and the world.
Buffy sat up as she
heard the song, “When I hear that Serenade In Blue…I'm somewhere in another
world alone with you, sharing all the joys we used to know…. Many moons ago.”
****
“Once again, your
face comes back to me,” the singer harmonized, as Angel saw Buffy’s face in his
own reflection-less car mirror. “Just like the theme of some forgotten melody.
In the album of my memory, Serenade In Blue.”
Over his nearly
three hundred years of existence, he heard a gaggle of countless and nameless
pretty tunes. Memorized a few only to forget them as time wore on. And even
though he hadn’t expected it, tonight- the music lightly played in his heart.
***
“It seems like only
yesterday, a small café, a crowded floor… And as we dance the night away, I
hear you say, "Forever more”,” Buffy sang out, to the amazement of the
driver, suddenly struck by the small young thing…
Her tone. Her words…
Her… feeling… It was real.
***
“And then the song
became a sigh- Forever more became goodbye, But you remained in my heart,” the
song went on, as Angel nearly stood up from the driver’s seat.
It drove him to his
heart, to break the carefully constructed shade he built and just be confronted
with the truth.
****
Buffy’s eyes opened
at the words she had just sung. He remained in her heart. She wasn’t empty.
Angel was a part of her- part of who she was… Of who she’d always be. Buffy felt the emotions bubble inside of
her, she didn’t realize she had missed her transfer- or that the bus was at the end
of its route… Turning and driving back to where it came from.
“So, tell me,
darling, is there still a spark,” she sang.
***
“Or only lonely
ashes of the flame we knew? Should I go on whistling in the dark,” he quietly
sang as he sat back in his seat, asking the air.
He already knew the
answer.
***
“Serenade In Blue,”
Buffy sang the end of the chorus, as the bus stopped at the spot where she had
met with Angel.
The feel of the
music, as the trumpets and clarinets has their moments in the spotlight filled
her and gave her the answers she had been seeking. Quickly- she hopped off the
bus and dashed to the backroads that with two hours of pathway- connected city
to city.
***
The song waltzed on,
as Angel sped forward- hoping to catch the most important bus he’d ever chase
after in his entire existence…
***
Her legs worked
fast… running to him- not wanting him to slip away…Running…
***
Driving…
Running…
Speeding…
Stopping…
And all of a sudden-
they were there together. A spark suddenly became the grandest fire either of
them had ever felt as they were rushing- rushing to be in each other’s arms
again. To hold, to kiss and to love.
With all of what was
standing in their way- of everything that told them otherwise, could it ever
outweigh the power of the love between them? Could it ever hold the tiniest
flicker of a flame to the heated passion they would always have for each other?
Not to them.
And even though these things squarely glared at them plainly in the face, as sunrise would loom over them at any minute- they took each other’s hand, together dancing and listening to the last refrain…
“So, tell me,
darling, is there still a spark? Or only lonely ashes of the flame we knew?
Should I go on whistling in the dark? Serenade in blue…Serenade in blue,” the
singer spoke for them, as they danced- wrapped tight in their lover’s embrace,
kissing and softly shuffling their feet….
THE END