An Adventuring We Go!
Once on a lazy Thursday noontime, a groggy person walked his way down the escalator. The dividing line between the Draperies and Housewares departments, the escalator and its isle were in a very central part of the store and was the easiest way for the downstairs workers to get to their respected areas without going through the "Employee Only" halls. Now this groggy person could have easily taken the Employee Only halls but figured there would be time to waste later and went straight downstairs to his area which happened to encompass almost a third of the downstairs of the Friendly World of Sears. Taking a right off the escalator, the purple haired Sears employee tugged at the annoying tie he had to wear and hailed his coworkers.
"Hey Mike," Was the response from the three other workers at the counter by the registers. Steve, the short blond and rather cynical guy was pretending to look busy by checking everyone's sales flashes on the computer. Tracy stood by the isle, constantly perky and playing traffic cop with the customers who probably would not be able to find a book over in Waldenbooks. All the while Limp Pimp was behind the counter with his incessant drumming.
The hot summer's day ground along at a snail's pace. It was slow enough to bore the associates out of their minds yet the customers that did come were all of the completely stupid variety. After having to markdown yet another item because the customer couldn't seem to read the sign and made a fuss about it, and old man came asking about a nose hair trimmer. With a mental shudder at the thought of this man's nose hairs, Mike asked what he needed help with.
"Well. . . ." The old man rasped "I. . .I..I…I'd like one of thee. . theee. . these here t-t-t-t-trimmers for the nose."
With another mental sigh at the length it took for this man to spit out one sentence, Mike replied "I'm sorry sir but we don't have any on the floor. Lemme go look and see if there are any in the back room." Mike turned and went towards the stock room as soon as the old man managed to get out 'Ok.'
Limp Pimp, drumming away, this time with pens in hand, was at the register and nodded when Mike said he was going to check on some stock. Leaving the Housewares/Bedding department, Mike had to walk through refrigerators to get to the stock room. Craig, a 20-something year old guy who didn't fit the shirt and sports coat he wore was not selling any refrigerators like he was supposed to so decided to rag on the purple hair.
"Well I'm not paying Sears to be here today. It pays to be on hourly." Mike retorted. Craig grinned knowing he had been beaten this time but there would be another. Leaving Craig to his non-excitant customers Mike entered the stock room.
The presentablity (well…presentable to customers and high ranking employees from Chicago or Albany) declined rapidly as soon as Mike stepped beyond the swinging doors between Fridges and TVs. Right as someone steps in, that person is facing the worst rack back there. Stacks upon piles of luggage are thrown haphazardly onto flimsy wooden shelving. Giant hardside pieces of Sampsonite teeter off the edge of the highest shelves, ready at the slightest touch to fall upon an unsuspecting associate. An unsuspecting associate named Mike or Steve, them being two of the three in the entire store that knew anything about luggage. Mike looked at the one piece of Sampsonite that seemed to have his name on it. He knew that if nothing was changed the newspapers would read "Death by Luggage" and Sears would send his family a ham, not a good honey glazed one either.
Putting the luggage out of his mind for the moment, Mike went left one isle left to the mass amounts of product in the Housewares area. With an audible sigh, Mike began scanning the boxes for the one filled with the nose trimmers. "Ah crap!" he said out loud upon seeing that they were way up high. Not finding a ladder near by, Mike settles for a reaching stick. It was an adjustable metal stick with a handle on one end and a little U-shaped hook on the other designed for getting hangers down. But during an office supply raid of the Women's department, this useful object was 'borrowed.' Hoping the trimmers would rain down upon him, Mike reaches up for the box.
"AK!!!" he yells! Wait a sec, he thinks, it's just that damn George Forman cardboard cut out. The realistic looking arm of the heavy weight champ reached over the boxes and simply bothered Mike in its realism up on top of the shelf. With a curse at Forman, he reached the stick back up. This time while fishing for the trimmers the arm didn't startle Mike. The arm didn't, but the body that fell did.
More coming soon!!
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