Split Personalities
Push Gold Stone
Road Work Ahead
::Cube press the stone, and the same sequence begins all over again. As if the fire from hell themselves lifted up upon mankind, smoke clouds them and flickering light makes it very difficult to see. After about 3 seconds, it's over and they can see normally again.::
Chris Hardy: I'm kind of afraid to look and see what I am!
Ice Cube: It can't be that bad, I mean it's not like we're going to shovel roadkill or something!
Chris Hardy: Don't say that it might happen!
Ice Cube: Well, let's check this out. I'm wearing a hellow hat... a whife-beater... a belt with a hammer on it and big ass boots!
Chris Hardy: Hey! You stole my gimmick!
Ice Cube: Oh no... look around!
Chris Hardy: Yeah so? We're in the middle of a road construction site... AAHHH!!! WE'RE ROAD WORKERS!!!!!
Ice Cube: Dude! This is good..... I think....
Chris Hardy: How so?
Ice Cube: Well, to be a road worker, you have to be really, super strong. So maybe our strenght increased like times a trillion!
Chris Hardy: Nah, you'll always be a puny wimp!
Ice Cube: I'll pretend you didn't say that!
::Just then from the distance...::
Foreman: Hey you jerks! Get back to work! We aren't paying you to stand around and play colored cars!
Ice Cube: We're being paid?
Chris Hardy: COLORED CARS!!!! I LOVE THAT GAME!!!!! I call pink!
Ice Cube: Shutup man, we have to do our job!
Chris Hardy: Uhh... explain to me this... what exactly, is our job?
Ice Cube: I'm not sure, let's go ask the foreman.
::Moments later....::
Foreman: No you cannot run the steam roller! No way!
Ice Cube: Come on! We promise not to flatten anyone!
Chris Hardy: What if we gave up our pay?
Foreman: Well.....
Ice Cube: Excuse me for one second, I need to talk to my associate here.
::The Jackasses walk back to have a private discussion.::
Ice Cube: You of all people should know never to give up money! Even if it's for the privelage to run a steam roller
Chris Hardy: You're right, I don't know what came over me!
Foreman: All right guys... if you promise to never come back to work... EVER... I'll let you run the steam roller for ten minutes.
Ice Cube: All right, we'll take that!
Foreman: Good, NOW GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!!!!
::The foreman walks away to take care of his duties. The Jackasses head for the steam roller.::
Ice Cube: What a deal! We're going to be leaving this place and never coming back anyway, so really aren't giving anything up!
Chris Hardy: Well, you certainly know how to cut a deal. That was way better than giving up our pay checks.
Ice Cube: Ok, I'll drive, and you ride right behind me.
Chris Hardy: Wait... why can't I drive?
Ice Cube: You drive? Hardy, you can't even ride a bicycle!
Chris Hardy: What are you talking about? The training wheels are coming off soon!
Ice Cube: Just leave it to me because I want to live through this.
::The Jackasses climb aboard the steam roller and start it up.::
Ice Cube: So far so good!
Chris Hardy: Now give her some gas man!
Ice Cube: Whoa! She's a little jumpy.
::Ice Cube tries the accelerator again, and this time everything goes smoothly.::
Chris Hardy: YAHOO! LOOK AT ME!! I AM RIDING BIG CONSTRUCTION EQUIPMENT!!! Now the next phase of my life is to comendere a farm vehicle!
Ice Cube: This thing sure is hard to steer....
::Cube runs over a road cone!::
Ice Cube: Sorry! My fault!
Worker#1: Hey watch were you are going with that thing!
Ice Cube: Don't tell me how to do my job!
Chris Hardy: LOOK OUT!
Ice Cube: AAAHHH!!!
::Cube tries to turn the wheel, but it's too late! Cube has demolished a fire hydrant! Water is going everywhere! The construction site is in malay!::
Chris Hardy: Look what you did!
Ice Cube: I didn't do it! I turned the wheel! This thing is out of control!
Chris Hardy: Looks like it's up to me!
Ice Cube: Where the hell are you going?!?!
Chris Hardy: I'll be back!
::Hardy jumps of the steam roller and heads off in a search. Meanwhile, Cube is trying to get the steam roller back under his control.::
Ice Cube: Look out! Run away steam roller!
::He topples a lemonade stand!::
Ice Cube: Sorry! I'll send you some potato chip coupons!
::Finally, Hardy returns with a jackhammer!::
Ice Cube: What are you going to do with that!?
Chris Hardy: Just watch!
::Cube remains at the wheel while Hardy takes his jackhammer several yards ahead. He's standing right in the roller's path! Hardy begins jacking into the cement road!::
Ice Cube: Get out of the way!
Chris Hardy: No! I've got it!
::Just then, without any warning what so over, the steam roller stops! Hardy ceases the jackhammer.::
Chris Hardy: What happened, I was about to save the day!?
Ice Cube: It ran out of gas!
Chris Hardy: Hey, look behind you!!!!
::The other construction workers are furious for the trouble The Jackasses have caused and are headed their way!::
Ice Cube: AAAHHH!!! DISGRUNTELED CONSTRUCTION WORKERS!!!!!!!
Chris Hardy: Quick! Press a stone on the saphire! That guy has a crowbar with my name on it!
Worker#2: THIS CROWBAR HAS YOUR NAME ON IT HARDY!!!!
Chris Hardy: See!! Do it! Do it now!!!!
Push Silver Stone