"Better"
A 2x1/Anti-Relena SongFic to "I Can Love You Better" by the Dixie 
Chicks
Written By Ara Catwing
Disclaimer: Mild hinting at yaoi... but you can't even consider it a 
lime. It's pretty out-of-character for EVERYBODY. I don't own "Gundam 
Wing" or the song. This is a fan-derived work for enertainment purposes
 only. No refunds if you ARN'T entertained. So there.

Heero rubbed his eyes and stalked out of bed. "Doorbell?" the sharp 
ringing continued as he threw on a shirt and shuffled towards the front
 of his apartment. He flipped on a radio and threw open the door,


*She's got you wrapped up in her satin and lace*

Relena stood grinning on the other side, in a frilly white and blue 
dress with a basket in her arms. She shoved past him, "'Morning, Heero!
 I brought you breakfast!"
"Re..."
She interrupted him, "I hope you like scones, and tea! I have three 
kinds of tea..."
"Relena!" Heero yelled, "Stop!"

*Tied 'round her little finger*

Relena narrowed her eyes and whirled upon him with deadly deliberance,
 "Yessss...?"
A sweatdrop appeared on his head, "Nothing."

*She's got you thinkin' you can never escape*

She patted the now SD Heero on the head and continued setting food on 
the table, "So," she asked, "Do you like the meal..." she turned just 
in time to grab the back of his shirt as he tried to tip-toe off, "and 
where are you going?"

*Don't you know your hearts in danger?*

"I, uh, I was going to..." he bit his lip and paused, "Go get dressed!
 That's it!" He half-heartedly struggled himself free and slowly 
started to back away.

*There's a devil in that angel face*

She glared a little more and he froze. Slightly sweatdropping he sat 
down , defeated, in a chair.

*If you could only see the love that you're wasting*

"You can get dressed later, and dress nice! I have a whole day planned 
for us, just us tw... What was that?" she looked around for the source 
of a noise. As a door creaked open, all eyes turned.

*I can love you better then that*

"skrcha, skrcha...yawn!" finally the door opened all the way, revealing
 a still half-asleep Duo.
"What's heeeee doing heeeereeeee?!" Relena's shrieks rang through the 
apartment, waking up Duo (not to mention shattering a window or two)
Confused, Duo looked around, then pointed, "What in the hell is SHE 
doing here?!" Both he and Relena pounced and started fighting.

*I know how to make you forget her*

Duo grabbed Heero's arm, "What are you doing to him, you witch?"
Relena grabbed his other arm and stuck out her tounge, then pulled 
down an eyelid, "I;m feeding him breakfast!"
Tug-of-War commenced, "I was gonna make him breakfast!"
"Too bad, braid boy!"
"Watch it, you co-dependent psychopath!"
"At least I don't have dillusions of grandure, mister Shinigami!"
"Whatever, 'Queen of the World'!"

*All I'm asking is for one little chance*

Heero groaned as both Duo and relena leaned back on their heels, 
pulling. Both let go and dropped Heero into a heap on the floor.

*Baby I can love you*

"Oh! Poor Heero!" both said in unison, then each fell to their knees 
and began caring for him. But in a few short moments they snapped out 
of it and began fighting again.

*Baby I can love you better*

"Witch,"
"Braid Boy"
Duo's fist hit Relena in the chhek, then her open palm struck his.

*I'm gonna break the spell she's got on you*

Bits of hair and droplets of blood flew as they fought,
"Heero is my boyfriend!"
"Over my dead body!"
"You are talking to Shinigami!"
"Too bad you're mistaken, you're really the god of losers"

*You're gonna wake up to find*

Duo looked down and noticed Heero had passed out, "This is your fault,"
 he said darkly. The he carried Heero back into the room and heafted 
him onto the bed.

*I'm your desire, my intentions are true*

When Heero finally came to, he awoke to the concerned face of Duo on 
the other side of the room, while Relena was on the phone, frantically 
reschedueling everything. She ducked into the room,
"Heero! Feeling better?"
"Omaeo..."
She interrupted, "Great!" she blew him a kiss, "Today could still work
 out!" Heero collopsed back into the bed...

*I know this time you're gonna see what you mean to me*

*So open up your eyes...*

Duo coaxed Heero back awake...

*'Cause seeing is beliving*

"Can I have your breakfast?"

--END--

(The lights dim and a curtain closes as sets are carried off)
(Enter one fanficker)

Fanficker (Ara): I *gravely* apologize for the previous fanfic. It was 
a direct result of too much time on the road with only country radio. Thus, I blame my friend...

(Another girl is pushed on stage by 2 burly stagehands)

Ara: Sari! Well, her real name is Sarah Na...

(Sari clamps a hand over Ara's mouth)

Sari: Don't tell them my real name!

(Sari shoves Ara off the front of the stage)

::thud::

(Sari walks off)

(Set goes dark)