Prep: Huah! Double popularity kick! Punk: Foolish prep, you are no match for my street cred! Hardcore rocking attack! Geek: Have you guys seen my calculator? Prep: Like, ew! You will totally die a virgin! Punk: I pretend to be down with the unpopular kids, but really, I love to exclude! Out of my face! Goth: Life. . . is . . . worthless. Punk: My clique brother, we must unite! Prep: You have no chance to survive! Jock boyfriend, go! Goth: Uwaa... (The goth is stuffed into a trash can by the prep's beefy football playing boyfriend.) Ah, blissful suffering! This persecution will allow another month of poetry! Punk: No! Now who will provide me with Wiccan death spells?! Prep: Hahaha! Now you must accept me as the true leader of this school! Punk: Never! Punk is not dead! We will one day inherit the earth and exclude all who do not meet our fashion standards! Prep: Like, no way! We totally had that goal first! Gangsta: Awright, I'ma smash you both down! Wigger: Totally, homies! Gangsta: But first, this slug's for you, yo! (Runs off shooting the wigger.) Punk: Hip hop is for losers. Sk8r: Yeah! Punk: Ah, the scum of the world! (Drop kicks the sk8r into the horizon.) Prep: Um, isn't anyone going to, like, watch me? Punk: Ah yes, you. Remember all those years you made fun of me? When I would cry like a girl in the bathroom? Prep: No. Punk: Well, this is payback! SUPER OLD SCHOOL PUNK PUNCH! Prep: (Casually steps out of the way. The punk flies into a wall.) Punk: I have been bested...why? Is garage coming back as the new statement for loners? Prep: Ahhhh! You broke my nail! Punk: Then it is a draw. We are both badly wounded... Non-Box: What happened here? Punk: My semi-popular sister! You must finish off the prep and avenge your people! Prep: Like, no! I would so totally get a jock to date you if you just finish off that punk! Non-Box: Huh? Why are you so obsessed with fashion that you would go at each other's throats like that? Punk: I am not obsessed with fashion! It's cool to be uncool! Help my excluding clique! Prep: No way! It's cool to be popular! You have hot guys hanging on your every word! Help my excluding clique! By now, the preps, jocks, gangstas, and wiggers are chanting for the Non-Box to kill the punk, while the punks, goths, garage kids, and sk8rs are chanting for the Non-Box to kill the prep. Non-Box: This is stupid. I'd much rather be a freak who doesn't revel in their freakiness and can be friends with anyone, regardless of clique. (Non-Box walks off.) All: ... Punk: Don't listen to her! She was just another wannabe-popular! Prep: Don't listen to her! She was just another grimy loser! The various cliques carry their respective fighters off, until next time...